I am indian

Just because you live long distance doesn’t mean it’s not a relationship. You are both interested in each other, therefore he shouldn’t be dating.

Demanding to read your private conversations. No, I don't think so. I once dated a woman in Texas who upon us first having sex she says to me "now I need to know the names of everyone you have had sex with." Sorry. No, I don't think so.

You keep him as your friend unless he breaks it off and you have no choice. If he won't stand up for you to her and explain your platonic relationship then he's not much of a friend. If she gives him an ultimatum it's his choice not yours and you accept what happens.

Back when my ex cheated on me, she did so with a guy who lives in Pittsburgh. We were, and still are, in Florida. So the distance between the two of you is meaningless. An affair can begin from anywhere and between anyone. She's not being unreasonable to be suspicious if there's something to be suspicious of. I DID read the private conversations my ex and the scumbag she cheated with had and it confirmed my suspicions. The distance wasn't a factor at all. An affair can be had over the internet, the phone, text messaging, whatever technology is available until such time as the participants can arrange for an in-person roll in the hay.

I will never forget the pain I felt when I found out Suzanne was cheating and it's the most intense pain ever. It's the reason I would never have an affair with a married woman because I don't want to be the scumbag he is. My advice would be to discontinue contact with him until such tine as it no longer threatens the current relationship OR you should come together as a couple with him if that's how you two feel and quit dancing around the issue. If he is just using her as a sex toy with a pulse then he's being a selfish prick.

Either back off or come together.

Just my $0.02

If she loves him, she will love his friendships and not be jealous of them - she hates him

That is a lot more drama than I would want cluttering up my life. Perhaps it's time to explore what interests you in your area that are conducive to actual social interaction, and cultivate some new friendships.

Sounds like you guys should fix your geography problems temporarily and see if that is all that is stopping you from being "more than online friends". I mean geography is a pretty thin reason to not find out at least, in this century

I mean she isn't wrong from your own description and without his input we will assume he is somewhat attracted to you.

He is your friend. Whether in person or via other means he is still your friend that you have invested time and energy with. About 17 years ago I talked about this with a Psychologist who said in fact - that the folks we interact with online are "real people" - when it's to that degree.

It's as real an any other relationship. Particulary when you realize that many of our IRL friends we see in person rarely - that most of our interaction is over the phone or online. She saw that today's world was coming.

I have a great friend that I've known since college and we can talk about virtually anything. He got a new girlfriend and she's jealous. He told me that when he told me about her.
I'll only hear from him on holidays I suppose for now. If they remain together and she becomes more secure I may get my friend back - or I may not.

It's a pain each and every time. And up until this one - he would have told them to go pound sand if they'd tried to step between us. So that was on him.

All I know it is - it's a pain when relationships change. Don't know what to advise you to do. Really he needs to work it out on his end.

I would lay low until he either decides to or not to get close with this gal. Demanding that he drop friends, insisting on seeing private correspondence etc sounds like a potentially huge amount of drama to me, which I would steer clear of, personally.

Is distance the only reason you and he are not together romantically? After 3 years, Whose excuse is that? Yours or his? I'd have these questions if I was a third party. Sounds like nobody in this triangle is ready for an intimate relationship. Just an outsider's view. Hope it helps. Best wishes to all of you.

I had a best friend at work . We had lunch together for years . When a man from work became interested in her , he told me to find another lunch partner , because he wanted to be alone (in the cafeteria ) , with her . I told him if he wanted to date her, he should ask her out on a date . It didn't last long . Later I began dating someone else , who worked in a different building . She was taking a class there , so they got together for lunch . Long story short , they eventually got married . Although it hurt at the time , I think I was the winner in the long run . Bide your time . Your feelings are strong for a man you've never met , and the chances of your meeting are small . Tell him , if his new love goes south , you'd love to get back in contact with him . Make some new friends . Won't be easy .

"He's the Only one I have at this point" sums up your problem nicely! Please get out there & build a life for yourself where you are!

I don't think that it is for you to handle. It is his business. He is a good friend and friends should be valued. Relationships should not demand the exculsion of all other friends. More friends would be good too.

Do you have any pets? Maybe you need a pet.

she is broken nothing you can do. Either you move near him or him near you see if its real.

You are right. She is insecure about something and it has nothing to do with you. Demanding to see your private communication with him is completely out of line She should solve her own issues before engaging in any further relationships.

I stopped at “demanded to read our private conversations”. Eject this stupid bitch from you lives.

Honestly, I'd delete and block the lot of them. Make newer and better friends.

Sounds like he’s the one putting you between them. I’d strongly question the motives and emotional stability of anyone who would put the onus of their relationship decisions on a 3rd party.

First, if he is the good friend you portray, ask him directly if his feelings for you are stronger than his feelings for her. If he says no, then go back to your female friend, and tell her that you value her friendship a great deal, but (1) she needs to get her head straight, and (2) you are not going to end your friendship with the guy simply to soothe her ungrounded fears.

You can't lose what you never had. Your buddy has a choice. You can wait for him to do that, or make your own move. Sometimes, you just gotta book. Good luck, hon.

I can't see a positive reason to respond to either of them. There's over 350 million people in America, find another friend, this is drama you can't win.

Let's be clear first. Are your intentions to be intimate with this man or just friends? In my view that is the first question to fully clarify.

What is the meaning of emotionally intense?

It is my view that if he likes her a great deal then the flirting should cease or he should make the move on pursuing you. If you were my partner I would not be a huge fan of flirting or sexually driven discussions of intimacy. I am impressed that she could feel that you have deep feelings for him. Very keen she is. It appears to me that a decision needs to be made. Hope everything works out to the benefit of all.