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Sooo... I have one of those super loving yet embarrassing mothers. The one that tries to set up dates for their handsome single son. Yeah. Shes THAT mom lol. Well I have been having trouble with this. And a coworker of mine has had the same thing happen to him after his divorce. Since my divorce I have dated but nothing serious has come along and recently I have kind of stopped trying because I feel I have wasted an unforgivable amount of time on the wrong people. Well My mother want me to meet some girl that she goes bowling with, a younger girl my age of course. She is very insistent on this even though she knows how I feel. But she just thinks, oh well you just have to find the right one. And I'm like, eeeh... I don't really HAVE to....Well she keeps bugging me so I agreed to humor her with this girl she keeps talking about recently. She says we will get along great and blah blah but she is really shy. Right off the bat I'm thinking, Well this is not going to work mom.... I'm shy too. haha
Anyway she wants me to meet her soon and I am not sure how to handle it. I don't want to act disinterested and hurt her feelings but that is kinda how I feel but it's nothing because of her. I have never met her how could I not like her. But I don't pretend well. I don't know how to react to this situation. I don't even feel like dates should be "set up". they should happen naturally. I'm going to meet her to make my mother happy for now. But she will never stop until she has a grandchild.....Sorry ma not a chance.... Well what exactly should I do here? Not sure how to handle it. I don't honestly have any interest in going and Im not even in a good position to be dating right now haha. Been slow at work all winter so I'm broke as hell for one, and I just don't have the time. Who has the time? I got to much shit to get done. Thoughts? Opting out is not an option because that will just start and argument with mom. No one wants that.

SilverDollarJedi 7 Feb 1
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5 comments

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0

Tell your mom that she can tell her friend that if she wants to meet you she can call and ask you out. And tell your mom its okay to give this woman your number. If she calls, be a super cool gentleman with her, and agree to do something with her. Hey, maybe she has a good paying job, and she might be really cool! You really don't have anything to lose. I mean, yeah, it could be awkward with long uncomfortable silences, but, hey, you are a grown man, you can handle a couple hours hanging out with a new person. Be open to the possibility that you might like her at least as a friend.

@SilverDollarJedi LOL. Yes it is remotely embarrassing. It really depends on what kind of relationship you have with your mother. So how are you going to address it?

1

You know you're going to go, so just suck it up and get on with it. Address the issue of it being awkward for you fairly quickly to your "date" and have a laugh about it. Perhaps you'll make a friend. And MOST important, give us all the excruciating details when it's over! 😉

0

Your mom doesn't want you to meet a girl and settle down....no, what she wants is to become a grandmother...to have somebody (kid) to mold exactly as she thinks is OK.
I had a "mommy" like yours....I never gave into her tricky ways....in fact, I put thousands of miles between her and myself.

@SilverDollarJedi My dear...there are all kinds of bullies. Yes, there are people who always want to impose their ways; they usually end up alone.

2

Here is an idea...
Your mom and this girl bowl together and I assume are part of a bowling league. If you can then stop in at the bowling alley to see your mom (you can come up with a reason for doing so) and she will introduce you to everyone there including the girl. If you like the girl you stop and talk if not you can leave. No harm no foul, you satisfy your mom and no pressure on you.

Betty Level 8 Feb 1, 2018

Brilliant

@MrLink

Thanks. I thought it could be an option. The girl could be just as reluctant as he is and it could have released the pressure on both of them to meet casually without expectations. He didn't seem to like the idea and I have no other. I wish him luck with whatever choice he makes. 🙂

@Betty you have good instincts on this

@MrLink

🙂

1

For a first time meeting, sight unseen, I would agree to meet this woman at a local coffee shop and not go on a date. You, and she, will be free spend as much time together as you are comfortable with, to size each other up and to see if you would want to take it to the date stage. If you are not interested you can just end the meeting gracefully and go on your way.

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