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Where do you draw the line?

What difference in age is a limitation for you in a relationship? 5 yrs/ 10 yrs/ more?

  • 20 votes
  • 35 votes
  • 52 votes
SadbDanae 5 Nov 28
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47 comments (26 - 47)

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2

There isn't one.(Providing it's legal of course) A big difference can come with certain issues or difficulties but if the two people are comfortable with it then so be it.

2

It seems like the older you get the less it matters. An 18 yo with a 28 yo.... But 45 and 55? Who cares

2

I voted for 10, although I wouldn't regard it as inflexible. My parents were 10 years apart. They had a loving relationship, but it did mean that when my father died of cancer at the relatively young age of 68, my mother was only 58, and she lived a widow until she was 91. Longer a widow than married! As for my own case, I am almost 75 and am eight years older than my wife. But at the moment I am in better health than she is, so it's a toss-up which of us will cark it first!

2

Hell if I know.

2

I said five, but I’ve been with older (19 yrs). And why I said five.

2

Age is just a number, but usually it is wise to stay within 10 years or you will not have a lot in common. But if you are talking about a fun weekend or something then what ever...

1

I didn't vote because my answer doesn't neatly fit into that poll. My late wife was 16 years older than me, but at that time I was a lot younger than now. At my present age, 60, I will only date 8 years older than me because at this stage of life, I don't want to end up a caretaker again with a partner so soon after my last turn. But I realize also at this stage, that I could be the one needing a caretaker just as much as my partner or that a woman even ten years older than me could be in great health and well out live me. So, I'm leaving the range at 8 years older to hedge my bets and ten years younger, knowing full well that few women that much younger will ever give me a look in these days of widespread cougaring among women 50-55 yo.

Yes Tom there are practical limits and the longevity gap is 81 men 88 women. ...you are spot on inside the practical love window UNLESS YOU ARE LIKE ME RADICALLY SHOOTING TO LIVE PAST 133 YRS of age. ...I need a radical vegan woman to marry maximizing our life expectancy through healthiest lifestyle

@GreenAtheist Your comment is kind of confusing. Maybe you can clarify it a bit. I'll be satisfied if I live another 15 years. Who knows after that?

@TomMcGiverin OK ....my goal is clear to live to be the oldest human 70 years from now with a scientific Feminist Atheist woman enjoying life together with me all those decades

@GreenAtheist I don't care that much about longevity. I care more about quality, which for me would be having a compatible partner who was Agnostic/Atheist, a fellow hipster, and someone who would enjoy music and travelling with me for as long as both of us had the good health to do so.

@TomMcGiverin of course BOTH QUALITY makes longevity possible and worth it to be the oldest couple around

@GreenAtheist Once again, longevity doesn't matter that much to me past a point. I don't want to live past the point that my health or quality of life becomes poor, with or without a partner. Don't care about being the last ones around, because, frankly this country and probably most of the world, are going to be pretty shitty places to live in say 15 years. So why be so excited about living another 30 years? I hope I'm wrong, but I see little evidence to convince me otherwise.

@TomMcGiverin I see abundant evidence of my peers not only to make the future better BUT OUR DUTY AND OBVIOUS NECESSITY to make America GREEN AGAIN. ...SORRY that you feel aligned with the climate change defeatists. ...we elected a GREEN DEMOCRAT JOE CUNNINGHAM to Congress from Charleston not only to stop off shore and arctic drilling but he is an ocean visionary like Bob Ballard where over 70% of the planet can be inhabited under water and managed sustainable

@GreenAtheist Enjoy your optimism. May you live long and prosper. Yeah, I know I'm stealing here. I'm done here Larry.....

@TomMcGiverin peace and long life. ...Admiral Kirk will be born on my birthday and maybe I shall live to see him born BY THE THOUSANDS in Riverside Iowa

@GreenAtheist Everybody needs a dream....

1

Being in my early 40s I have no problem with marrying a woman in her mid 20s or late 40s

1

I date a person, not their birth certificate

1

As long she's 18 I won't give a fucking damn we'll wait Until she turns 21 the rare fun commence

1

A wise friend of mine (who was dating someone less than half his age) once said "you are only as old as your girlfriend".

1

It never mattered to me. I've went both older and younger.

1

For men 5 years younger is almost too much, 15 older is fine.
It's why nursing homes are filled with women.

MsAl Level 8 Nov 28, 2018

Nursing home are filled with women cuz they nagged to death the men they were married to.

@Lop-Eared-Mule That's the kind of thing my ex husband used to say. He was a traditional type and didnt like it if I disagreed or questioned him. That's why we're divorced.

1

For myself I usually look in the 5 year older to 10 year younger range. But that's just browsing the field. Each person is a unique case, and I love to break rules, especially my own.

1

I’ve only dated +/- about 7 years each direction but I would go more

1

I relate a lot it’s with the younger crowd 20’s to 30’s because I forget that I’m older sometime and I keep a youthful mind , some say I’m immature not that someone in their 20’s or 30’s are immature but I always have a sense of humor and I have a sense of wonder and adventure .

1

Obviously there are exceptions but I said 10. I've dated women mostly younger, some older. At my age (55) it doesn't really matter that much. My most successful relationships have been with women 5-8 years younger

I'm more concerned about if they have kids and are they financially independent. I prefer someone with no kids or older kids who live on their own. I can pay for my own retirement and I'd like it if they could too. And all that other stuff like chemistry, values alignment, intelligence...

1

I don't, married twice, 1st wife 10 years younger, married for 10 years. 2nd wife. 15 years younger, married 5 years now, I'm 65 she is 50, better than ever!

1

In which direction?

0

I would like to find a women in about her mid to late 30s' because many women my age really seem to be rather conservative in their thought patterns due to their upbringing in the highly paternalistic culture. I doubt seriously one much younger would find a guy who is 61 to be what they are looking for.

0

A practice that even if accepted as mainstream shouldn’t alter evolutionary consequences.

0

You love who you love. I've dated women in their 20's, 30's, 40's, 50's, and 60's. In true love the age difference knows no bounds. Here in Virginia Beach, VA I hear that "Oh I wish I could be younger again" from many people. In my book age is just a number. To be honest, there are bad apples in any pot regardless of age and gender. When it comes to dating, more need people rid themselves of the thought of there is a soulmate i.e. the one for them. I’ve personally never believed in the whole concept of “soulmates”. No matter how ahead of the curve you think yourself to be, there will be thousands like you walking the same curve. You will think that you are the only one who has those odd habits, odd idiosyncrasies, or you are the only one awake at that particular hour of the night. But the truth is, there are hundreds, perhaps thousands who are exactly like you. There are plenty of people who would satisfy an individual criteria of Ms. Right and Mr. Perfect. It’s just pure coincidence that you found one of them and were acquainted to him or her and now consider them your “soulmate”. In the end, “the one” is the one you choose, so choose well!!

My stance for many years is its better to be single and lonely than together and miserable with the wrong person. The time we are blessed with on this Earth is very finite. Time spent in a bad relationship is time wasted finding the right one. You can’t find the love you deserve if you’re giving attention to a dead-end relationship. Once you become the person you want to meet wants to find, you will find yourself in the right place to find the person who’s right for you.

You don’t choose who you’re attracted to, but you definitely choose who you fall in love with and (more importantly) who you stay in love with.Real love is an unconditional commitment to an imperfect person. Real love isn’t just a euphoric, spontaneous feeling—it’s a deliberate choice—a plan to love each other for better and worse, for richer and poorer, in sickness and in health. At the end of the day, what matters is that we VALUE and LOVE the people that are in our lives. It's essential to learn that happiness is more than just a feeling. It is also a choice and the result of a series of choices. We have to choose to appreciate and love those around us.

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