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This is how a church should be. Your thoughts?

As an atheist, I have not been in a church for decades. But this week a friend invited me to the Cascade Unitarian Church.

It was wonderful! I knew nearly everyone and felt loved and welcomed.

The minister's message was about improving the Golden Rule. Treat people as they want to be treated, not how you want to be treated. Over 22 religions have some form of the Golden Rule.

This message resonated with me. I felt centered and grounded. No mention of Jesus.

Members were invited to light a candle and share joys or sorrows. One man talked eloquently about how he refused to accept help and it resulted in loneliness. He spoke of his "trembling and vulnerable heart" and the weight of "carrying the flaming saber of justice."

"Your words hit me in the center of my chest," I told him afterward. I got lots of hugs and enjoyed connecting with old friends. Found two new female hiking partners!

Next week they will celebrate Paganism. I plan to go. This is what church should be: acceptance and connections between people.

LiterateHiker 9 Dec 9
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31 comments

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3

Sounds like they know what to emphasize; in a word, community.

1

Four of the US presidents were Unitarians, including John Adams and his son, John Quincy Adams.

1

Sounds interesting. Glad you enjoyed.

0

i have never been christian; i don't go to churches (i mean, to visit, like for the architecture of the history, or a concert, yeah, but "go to church" isn't something i have a history of doing. so why would i want to choose a church and see how a church should be? it all sounds very pleasant if you need a church, and i am not being sarcastic. i don't happen to need one.

g

@genessa

I went for the community.

@LiterateHiker there is nothing wrong with that, if that is what you want. i don't want the community of people in a church. there are other communities.

g

1

Looking at earlier posts, I agree with both sides. I was invited to a Unitarian X-mas party and to a 'service' a few years ago. I came away with very mixed feelings. Good people, but not my kind of people.

1

When I was in High School in Denver, I did a program with the Unitarian Church where every weekend for a couple of months we went to a different church service. We did just about every denomination out there. It was interesting and fun.

1

When I was in High School in Denver, I did a program with the Unitarian Church where every weekend for a couple of months we went to a different church service. We did just about every denomination out there. It was interesting and fun.

3

When I was going through a rough patch in a relationship I felt I needed some kind of guidance or uplift. I went to the local Unitarian Universalist church a couple of Sundays. It didn’t help. Still felt shitty, didn’t get any insight and it’s still involves a magical entity in the Universe somewhere. Went to see a shrink, it was much more productive! ?

That is a good point, some UU congregations are more theistic-leaning than others. In theory, they all accept unbelievers with open arms, but how that works out in practice is somewhat local. I attended a UU service in NC for example and the order of service and liturgical style there in the middle of the Bible belt would be weirdly familiar to any southern Baptist. And I do mean weird. It is as if the service were designed by a Baptist on cocaine.

1

I hear good things about them .. I'd be interested just to meet liberal minded people

1

Would it be the same if you knew no one there?

2

I have been to Unitarian churches before and found them as you describe. If they would take "church" out of their title and hold get-togethers on other days of the week, I might still attend occasionally.

The do not refer to themselves as a church, but as a congregation or society. In most areas the name of the local congregation reflects some form of this, but some people tend to refer to it as "the UU church" because they aren't aware that it's a post-Christian phenomenon or because prospective attendees aren't looking for a "society" to attend and find the terminology confusing.

Fellowship not church, I never use the word in describing my group.

1

Carrying the flaming saber of justice sounds a tad overwrought and probably reflects that he's a social justice warrior, which is fine ... but the intensity can be a little off-putting to me. The local UUs here have been known to chain themselves to the entrance gate of the local fracking facility, and social status is tied partly to how many time's you've been arrested. Not my cup o'tea but I admire their devotion to their ideals.

I haven't felt the acceptance and connection you describe with the UUs here but it's probably more me than them I suppose.

I, too, admire their devotion, but the flaming saber of justice part seems a little over dramatic to me.

@PalacinkyPDX As I said, there's nothing wrong with it. I'm also not speaking to social justice in the abstract, but to being a SJW ("social justice warrior" ) which is that intense, crusading sort of ethos that often (though not always) comes with second-class citizenship for those who are not into same level or intensity of involvement. I have said before that the UUs have a tendency to eradicate theological dogma as a source of exclusion and virtue signaling, only to replace it with political activism.

If making the world a better place gives you the label "SJW", then bring it on!

1

I might have to try one☺

1

I love that. I wish that it was in my neighbourhood

3

Religion is simply nothing more than a tool for which you can either build or destroy with it.
That’s why I don’t judge religious people until they give me a reason to. Yet sadly the concept of unity and fellowship has been lost on most of society let alone the church but it’s also said that religion is merely a reflection of society so it’s next phase should be very interesting.

1

My family was invited to a wedding at a Unitarian Church a month ago. I didn't mind the service at all and it was quite affirming. At the reception the minister, or whatever he is called, poured drinks for all. Really upbeat.

gearl Level 8 Dec 9, 2018
1

Some of my clients attend Unitarian churches all around the country. Seems that some are a bit theistic minded and some are totally secular, humanistic even. Some love it, some left due to a bit too much spiritual talk. I like the idea of gathering for life-affirming messages and discussion.

I think each congregation defined how much religion goes into their services. Supply and demand, I guess. Glad you found a great fit for you in your area.

I agree that the golden rule should be to treat others how THEY would like to be treated, not necessarily how you would like to be treated. Sometimes they are one and the same - sometimes not. 😉

1

That sounds great! I'm currently trying to start a Unitarian church in my area because there isn't one. I did briefly attend one in college, and my impression was "this is where the smart people go" because there was a lot of interest in different cultures and religions, and tolerance for other views, including atheism.

Orbit Level 7 Dec 11, 2018
2

Cool. We've talked about trying to start a little UU church here. We have a chance to talk about it with someone from the UU organization sometime in the near future. It would be amazing if we could make it work. Reading this made me more excited to see those conversations get started.

2

That’s what we need more of. If we had churches giving out messages without mention of religions I think we can convert some to our way of thinking.

1

Brilliantly! Sounds like the ecumenical services that joined the Catholic and (Protestant ) Church of Ireland communities in my home in Ireland. It's fantastic when people put aside their differences and acknowledge that we are all human, fragile and vulnerable. This to me is community, regardless of religion.
My parent recently went to a Quakrr wedding and reported a similar experience to yours, very all encompassing.
Now, if only we could put the invisible friends aside.....

Tilia Level 7 Dec 31, 2018
1

I was surprised to learn that a Unitarian church in my area (northern Virginia) actually mentions Jeebus and sings hymns. But apparently the local UU churches have a wide latitude. Some congregations actually call their buildings meeting houses, not churches.

1

yes I enjoy going to UU meetings every now and then . I love it when its an all women group too, I don't mind it when its not but somehow just a wee bit more evocative and clearer when its nearly all in one range

1

Interesting (to me) information about Unitarianism: Four presidents of the United States were Unitarians. One of our greatest founding fathers, John Adams, was one of them. He was a strong advocate of the separation of church and state. In 1797, he signed the "Treaty of Tripoli", in which he wrote, "“As the Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion,—as it has in itself no character of enmity against the laws, religion, or tranquility, of Mussulmen [Muslims]..." Some of our modern politicians would be well served by re-reading that passage.

0

My UU fellowship is lay led, we have programs of interest to the community. Never a mention of any personage you must believe in or dogma to believe. Good people with lots of different viewpoints but nobody pushing anything on anybody. I was recently elected the president of the board of directors and am en living the place up a bit. We are called a liberal religion but there is no religion present in my fellowship.

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