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What do you think?

lalaland52 5 Feb 27
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26 comments

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9

I wouldn't say hardest to love. I'd say more discerning. I prefer being alone than settling. I'd like a partner, but I don't need one.

I don't necessarily want a partner. I would prefer a friend who likes me, wants to spend time with me, enjoys doing things together that we both enjoying doing and I would feel the same about her.

6

Not hard to love at all, unless you require dependence, rather than partnership, to deem someone lovable.

That long-time singles likely have very high standards for what they would give up their singleness for, absolutely. Personally, I do not see that as a bad thing.

Zster Level 8 Feb 27, 2018
4

I think as a general rule most people need to feel needed and long time singles may want a partner but don't need a partner.

4

Yes,in my case,I have been single well over ten years and your post is very accurate to my situation. I want a solid relationship with someone,but just can't seem to find a person who can be both friends and lovers without all the b.s. I absolutely cannot sleep with someone else in my bed anymore,but love to be affectionate and cuddle. I'm not used to someone keeping tabs on me,and I don't do well with having to call or txt someone everyday----i run out of things to say and it seems forced to me. Interaction should happen more natural in my opinion. But it sucks to be alone and especially frustrating to have a lot of gals reject me ,due to my lack of religious affiliation.

It does NOT suck to be alone!!!! Embrace it, enjoy it .....it is in our minds / society that we have to Have to have somebody to be happy!

Get a REALLY big bed.

4

Having been single and living alone for 50 years, I agree with this. However, I am not sure I would use the expression "hardest to love" but perhaps "hardest to have a serious relationship with". IMHO

3

I think they have it the wrong way around,
instead of being single so long making us hard to love and be loved,
we find it hard to love and be loved, hence being single so long.

3

People who 'need' other people in their life and go on to rate independent people as harder to love are actually THEMSELVES harder to love.

Choice is a far more nourishing element in a loving relationship than need. Admiration of another person's individuality and independence is preferable to rejection of them because they aren't also needy. People who remain single for long periods because of independence and out of choice are the easiest to admire, trust, respect and love. Why? They bring something to the table and are therefore able to give and share. Who gives and shares need? How can they believe it to be attractive and the makings of a strong, loving bond?

Those are my thoughts it

I loved your answer. !!! Perfect !

3

Not sure I agree. I think there are many reasons people are single. But if someone has become independent and at home with themselves, it makes them easier to love, not harder.

3

Sounds like BS.

I suspect the opposite is often true. Hard to love people wind up single for a long time.

2

I don't need someone to "complete" me as I'm already complete.

Now, it would be nice to have a companion who likes the same thing as I. But to have them around every minute of the day.... no thank you. I've already raised my children.

2

I think it's better to want someone in your life, rather than need someone. Maybe that's why I'm without a partner now. I truly do not understand the idea of requiring someone to "need" you to have a fulfilling relationship.

2

The longer I'm single, the more confident and picky I get. I'd agree with that meme.

1

When you are content alone you are far less likely to settle or to take on risks you may have considered due to loneliness.

1

You got to know when to hold them, know when to let-go, and know when to run.

1

I don't know, it depends on the person I guess. I spend a lot of time alone but I'm not stuck on the idea. I just think sometimes it may not happen again for me becouse I have to many deficits. I'm nearly deaf so communication is difficult sometimes. I'm a truck driver so I don't have a lot of time to get to know someone, maybe one day when I retire. I think the best feelings in life is loving someone and being loved by someone. It's just hard for me to make the connection to begin with but it wouldn't take much to convince me to try.

1

I agree, especially if they have been traumatized. My wife was open for brief flashes, but had a closed sign that I never understood.

But I can read, and she may be out of business now.

0

I actually agree with this statement. I've been divorced 40 years.

0

I actually agree with this statement. I've been divorced 40 years.

0

The opposite is true...single for so long means ready for loving the best NOT JUST THE NEXT

0

We are not harder to love, we just know that we are able to go on living a meaningful happy life and not be dependent on someone else for that. We do not have to settle, and the person that comes into our lives has to be super extraordinary.

0

Probably so

0

I'm still willing to give it a shot...life is short.

0

I disagree, I simply don't need anyone in my life.

0

Not in my experience, people still seem to love me. B-)

0
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