We wanted to spend almost all of our free time together, even during the mundane.

I now realize we could have done that without a license. Back then, though, married couples were treated much more kindly socially than couples "living in sin" were. If I was to meet someone now, I am not sure about the license as I deeply resent others thinking that they get to decide whether or not my living and loving is legit or not.

The only hesitation I might have would relate to the legality of any inheritance preference following my demise. Sometimes that piece of paper greatly simplifies the estate/probate process.

You hit the nail on the head. I am conditioned by society to believe so many things are necessary. I got married, had kids, divorced- now like so many guys I effectively paid my ex to shack up with another dude, whilst she took everything I owned. Left me to consider truth. She was very religious and I had tried to fall in line. Tried to make a bed and lie in it. Guess my heart wanted love but my brain rebelled being turned into a thick paste. Some days I feel I rise above it, above the programming. I know ill never get married again, but I also know I might because im stupid lol. as society keeps pumping out what I apparently should want into my brain its very hard to convince myself that its just constructed BS. Hard because finding anyone like minded seems virtually impossible lol. Plus I see the sheeples around me wallowing in the construction and they seem happy, they get human contact... its like everyone is sleep walking and it makes me I want to sleep walk too.
Gah I think marriage is a bad idea. I like the notion but it seems either im crap at it or it really is a toxic turd.

The first time I was a senior in high school and pregnant. Our moms put their heads together and decided we would sneak off to the county court house to be married. 1964. Against the rules to be pregnant in high school then, so it was a secret. After graduation, we set up housekeeping. I lost the child at 7 months pregnant as a result of an auto accident. Marriage lasted maybe 3 years. I ran away to NYC in the middle of the night while my husband was away on duty at the Naval Air Station. Second marriage: This man said we should get married for tax reasons. We went to court house again. NYC 1966-7? That marriage lasted maybe 5 years? I had 2 sons in that marriage. Geesh! I was so duh...Third marriage: I was told by an attorney in Illinois that I couldn't win custody of my kids if I was living with someone. Off to the courthouse, once again. it was1977 I doubt that I'd marry again. I'm 71 years old, and learned a heck of alot about who I am and what my needs are. Walking the fire, I call it. I believe in commitment, if I were to find another mate. I can't imagine meeting anyone who could tempt me to join up with them.

I was 21 years old. Still married to the same gal 44 years later. Sometimes we get lucky

Which time?

I wanted to raise a family.....and the sex wasn't bad. You have to remember, for me this was a long time ago.

I think you nailed it. Because it was expected by my family and society. I told my last wife when I married her, "I don't even believe in the institution of marriage," but still did it.

Now I'm extremely done with marriage. It's stuuuuuuuuuupe.

Tax reasons would be the only reason I would not get the need to otherwise . Maybe it was my instincts or summit like that

I'm still asking myself that same question.

Not important. I want to be with someone. I don't need a contract.

I felt sort of like my mom expected me to get married after college. I married my ex 2 months after graduation. I was 22 and 20 when we met. He was 9 years older than me so we started a family right away. Raising kids is hard business. About 10 years in I realized how unhappy I was and that I was WAY too young to know what I wanted in a spouse. Took another 10 years before I finally divorced.

I genuinely hope my daughters wait longer than I did to get married and start a family. But....I’m also going to be an empty nester when I’m 45 so that is a big plus.

I am 99% sure I’ll never get married again. I’m also a bit cynical about love and if men actually have feelings so who knows, that could change.

I was drunk

The first time I was twenty four and I didn't know any better I suppose. The second time happened because I knew it was important to her, she wanted kids. So she got off the birth control and on to the prenatal vitamins and once she was pregnant, I asked her to marry me. The kids being the biggest reason to get married I suppose. Would I do it again? I don't think it brings anything to the table but if it was important to who I was with and if I'd decided that yeah, I'm planning on staying with this person then yeah, I'd do it again.

I was young, naive, and had low self-esteem.

Well the first time was to escape an abusive home. The second time, I suppose because it seemed like the thing to do at the time. There really were a whole lot of reasons for the second time, none of them had anything to do with love though. At least on my part.

It was 1979, I was 17 with a baby and if the parents got married before a child was 6 months old, it could have the father's name. More than 6 months required adoption. I had 3 weeks to spare.

Second time, I gave into family pressure and married who everyone thought was a nice guy that would take care of me blah blah blah.

Not married but I'm in the same mind set as you. Mostly I think it would be nice to find a special someone who's weirdness compliments my own. Share private moments, do things together, but still be able to give each other space.

She was the “one”. . So elusive, but that partner exists.

I married more because it was looked down upon to have children out of wedlock. This is also because of religion in a way. I married a second time because I believed that I should not be a single father. With no love in the thought process it’s no wonder these things failed. I see no reason to marry again. We value connections. “When your with me be with me, when your with them, be with them”

On my first attempt, I thought I had found someone I could spend my life with. Won't make that mistake again

Rode that bike at 19. Found out 11 yrs later that it had no seat. I try not to speak in absolutes, nothing is certain except death and taxes. But, I don't aspire to be married again. And won't consider it until anyone can marry who they want, across the globe. Otherwise, the institution of marriage is meaningless.

I have never been married. I have dated but nothing really series. No kids in fact when I had to go through chemo (long story but if you want I’ll tell you.

We had children and it seemed the right thing to do which was not the right reason going in so I was and am not surprised that it didn't work out. That being said the reason it didn't work wasn't quite what I imagined.

Weddings can be a sign of commitment (no snarky comments here!), legal/financial reasons or especially if one is going to start a family. "Marriage" can be/mean many things, but the legal commitment is usually just that, for the peace of mind of financial/familial security. What may not be needed for a couple may be important for a "family".

I was young, and in love, and thought life was like a Disney movie only better.