My wife and I courted for ten years on and off before we married, less than four months after that she died. Life is short it is better to fill it with a lot of mistakes made in haste, than play safe and make none but the mistake of emptiness.

I have to say that saying you waited 6 months to a year sounds like you were holding back all that time, rather than being honest about how you felt. So, one could say you were as needy as anyone else, which is just a matter of desperation, not whether you're worthy or anything. It's not necessarily unhealthy to grab a life preserver when you're drowning, it's just a situation you both should be aware of and work with. It's not against the law to be lonely. If you can't handle meeting someone who's more than ready to start a relationship and who's willing to jump in with both feet, fine, but don't make it a crime and run into the night screaming. Of course building trust and everything takes time, but that's not the same as having the hots for someone. Just a thought. Personally I've held off getting involved with anyone for a very long time. That hasn't earned me any brownie points, and one could just as well say I haven't been willing to be open enough. Putting arbitrary time limits on how you feel and whether to express it is just another form of game playing.

However, I do agree that it takes time to know if you really love someone for who they are, not just how bad you need to be in a relationship. If you know someone hasn't gotten to know you well enough to love you, then yeah, they are at least a bit needy if not delusional or deceptive. For example, online dating sites are full of scammers who pelt unwary men and women with flowery promises of love, betting on their loneliness so's to take advantage of them.

The right time to tell someone you love them is the instant you feel it.

When two people feel strongly for one another, love knows no time or boundaries.

I'm not going to live my life counting how many days, weeks, or months go by before I tell the man I love that I truly love him. It could be too late.

I'd rather have loved and lost than not have loved at all.

Love is worth every smile and every painful tear.

This is bullshit. What do you call trust? Loving can happen anytime weather you just met someone or you have been together for years, and simply because you have been with someone for years and he or she "I love you", make them real. Most domestic violence is done by people we have known for decades.

That depends. It is only words and what do they actually mean. So many people say I love you but in the next breath call you horrible names.

The rules are, there are no rules.

yes there has to be a comfort level and on going affection for quite a while to make sure the chemistry is accurate,,i agree saying it too soon scares the other person and may cause a break off of the relationship,,so best to take it eay and enjoy life,,the right moment will come along in the future

I also think that love takes time. And certainly more than one week! It would be nice to hear what particular thing he loves..."I love your smile", "I love your sense of humor", "I love the way you handle disappointment"....particulars. If he says it again....maybe you can see what it is and if he can define it. Somehow that would be more of a buildup of getting to know you as the person you are and if your feelings are mutual or heading in the same direction! I find it odd when people throw that word around so casually.

it's all very complicated, but usually it's right after pancakes.

Depends on what you mean by love. In the context of a relationship it can be dicey. I would explore why he said it. Use it as a way to talk about your relationship and were it is and were you are both looking to have it go. I find the idea of being threatened by it interesting. I get it I do and am in no way judging your response. Outside your specific situation which I know nothing about I think love means many things to many people. I mean can you take it as simply a sign of affection and a sign your relationship is growing? If you talk to him perhaps you will learn why he may feel needy. I think what you are both looking for is an important consideration. If you ask him about it and are honest about your reaction it may help either strengthen your relationship or end it before it gets deeper and more traumatic if it did end. Honesty is hard on all sides. But if he really values you as a person and partner he will listen and understand. If he reacts badly perhaps you will dodge a bullet as it were?

It seems that men often use it as a lever. A week is way too soon. Love needs to be demonstrated before it is spoken.

"I love you" shouldn't mean "I think we need to be together forever"...

Why would there be a 'time' love is a feeling. honesty is important, saying it without feeling it wold be dishonest, not saying it while feeling it would be too.

a week, a month, seems right.. honestly waiting 6 months to a year is strange to me. if love hasnt bloomed in that long, welcome to the friend zone, Ive moved on to someone that understands their needs.

You have to feel it to say it...there is no time limit...

I trusted the man I love very quickly so it was easy for me to say I love you in a short time...

That sounds like love bombing to me. I had an ex that started talking about our future and if we were to be exclusive and about the future after just 1 date. It seemed bizarre then, but he was using it as a manipulative tool since he was a narc. Now I would be leery of any man that professed seriousness so soon.

It's too soon for you but it wasnt for him. You have different backgrounds and experiences. It doesnt mean he is needy . And it doesnt obligate you to say anything.

IMO, way to soon! After one Week of having met. I agree with the needy assessment and not sure I could ever trust the person. Unstable comes to mind.

my thought is that it doesn't run on anyone's calendar or schedule. this is an impossible question. there is no time-related answer. when you feel it and are not afraid to say it, that's when.

g

Yes, totally agree. There is no need to say anything like that when you are just getting to know each other and barely got a start on that just after a week. One must actually like someone first before even thinking about taking it to the next level.

When you really mean it.

Must have been 'love at first sight'........

Love is a good thing. I don't see anything wrong with it.

I proposed marriage after one week.

She said, "But, I don't know if I love you."

"It will grow," I said.

"You need to talk about this to my mom," she said.

We've been married quite happily for more years than anyone in the family wants to remember because of how old it makes them feel.

So, in answer to your question: It depends on the people involved.

I don't set any time limit on when I say it, however I do want to know the person before I do. Getting to know someone does take some time... more than a week, however if someone told me that they loved me after only a week it would not bother me.

Not letting things progress at their own pace seems a bit like fishing for reciprocation, but it would probably be preferable, at least from my perspective, to qualify these feelings instead by saying things like, "I love spending time with you, I love your take on the world, I love your personality, etc."

At this early stage, "I love you," seems to involve more questions than one might have later in the relationship. It's also an unfortunate reality that dating and partnering often pressures some people to try to "close the deal" as it were, out of fear the person they desire and have strong feelings for might "get away."

That being said, I remember someone once pointing out, "emotions are neither good nor bad, they just are."