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LINK The Lack of Opposite-Gender Friendships Among Evangelicals is Itself a Problem | Beth Stoneburner | Friendly Atheist | Patheos

Patheos article on lack of opposite gender relationships among Evangelicals

Hages 7 Sep 27
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I have also found that emotionally healthy hetero people tend to have some friendships with queer people as well as platonic friendships with opposite sex heteros. Having friendships with queer people of the same sex helps hetero people learn that relationships don't have to be mainly about sex and sexual attraction. It helps people learn to not be threatened by sexual attraction that is not mutual and to be clear about their boundaries and secure in their own identity and orientation. Those people tend to make better relationship partners once they do choose a monogamous relationship. However, I have found that most hetero people who have not had any friendships with queer people and have also been raised in traditional religious homes have problems with jealousy regarding platonic opposite sex friendships by their partner once they begin a commited relationship with someone. Too much conditioning from their background that makes them distrustful.

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First reason: They believe all men are supposed to think alike and all women are supposed to think alike.
Second: They're all hypersexualized in reality so this is no surprise they can't trust their friends to talk to their wives. Everything is about conning people, one reason is sexual submission...it creates a culture of distrust, which, ironically is ALSO considered immoral to them.

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I can't even manage one with an agnostic.

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Same problems with same sex schools.

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Very telling statement

bobwjr Level 10 Sep 27, 2020
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All religions are obsessed with sex...the more extreme the faith the more obsessive the belief that sexual behaviour must be controlled because unless it’s within the sanctity of a heterosexual marriage, It is sinful. This is unhealthy and it leads to repressed sexual feelings and activity, because normal friendships between men and women must be treated with suspicion and curtailed, as they are potential temptations which could lead to sexual acts. Teenagers are encouraged to marry as early as possible the first boy or girl of the opposite sex who takes an interest in them. We all know that most of us find our way through quite a few relationships with the opposite sex before we eventually find someone we feel we want to spend the rest of our lives with, and even then the divorce rate proves that we don’t always get it right. Can you imagine the number of those hastily arranged early marriages that must prove to be unhappy and monotonous..only ever having intimate knowledge of one person of the opposite sex during one’s entire life must arouse the desire to try out some new “forbidden” fruit and “sowing of wild oats” which the rest of us do prior to marriage and not after.

Western marriage was developed as a way to record the provenance of children, thus making closely related procreation less likely, especially in the days when travel was rare.
It has outlived its usefulness.

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I once knew an Evangelical who required his wife to walk behind him. No joke.

That is common in Africa and in many Eastern societies. I saw it often in Kenya amongst both Muslims and Christians. Fortunately, many modern Kenyan women now are less subservient.
This reminds me of the following tale.
There was a time when the man rode ahead on the camel, whilst his wives walked behind, carrying his possessions on their heads. However, recent events have changed all that. and now the wives walk ahead whilst the man rides behind and the camel carries his possessions.
You see, there are many unexploded land mines about.

They’re stuck living in the 40s and 50s. They are a lost cause.

Mmm sounds like he’s still living in the Stone Age.

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Evangelical men want their women to serve them.

Except when it comes to the drinks!

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You could not invent it.

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