And with respect to that second picture: even if you are also trans, it's still none of your fucking business (at least until the individual makes it your business..) How can we expect cis people to play by the rules when trans people so often don't?

I've often joked "Never ask a trans person about their genitals. Just chat to them for 5 minutes, and they'll tell you." But there's plenty of truth in that. The ones who want to discuss it will raise the subject and disclose their own transition history and goals without being prompted. Those who don't wish to discuss it won't raise the topic, so leave them alone. Maybe if you open up about your trans status, they'll open up about theirs, but it's inappropriate to ask directly what's going on in someone's pants, regardless of your own trans status.

If it's natural curiosity, then why do we blame cis people for being just as curious? Personally, I think it's more sinister: a means some trans people use to distance themselves from those who aren't sufficiently dysphoric or committed to transition to qualify as 'twuly twans.'

These are the people who complain when TERFs tell them they aren't really women, but who in the next breath will tell someone they aren't really trans because they're not on the surgical path. Demanding respect for your own sincere gender identity while disrespecting the sincere gender identities of others is the epitome of hypocrisy.

I love John Oliver and he’s right, the decision is yours and no one else’s business

Thanks.
mee too.