Agnostic.com
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Hello, I'm Dave and I'm an alcoholic and addict recovering from a plethora of diagnosed mental health issues. I won't go into those in that a) they are directly related to my addictions and b) I was informed I was "over diagnosed" by a state agency in order to increase funding and boost their success rate.

This group is also for those "recovering" from religion and to provide a safe form for us all. "Recovering" in this context can mean overcoming the belief, overcoming the self doubt of "fence sitting", moving toward a universal model that works for you and becoming confident in said universal model.

I will refer often to the methods used in the institution in which I gained my counseling certifications decades ago. While my formal education ended then (I've done much directed reading in several related fields since), I was a residential counselor trained in a one year program with a holistic approach that boasted a 99% recovery rate.

By holistic I mean we counseled and taught life and coping skills while mediating daily groups sessions. Each client also received private psychiatric, educational and occupational counseling.

While I cannot say their recovery rate wasn't inflated as well I was in the meetings which proclaimed both our successes and the one "failure" who had come to us from the juvenile court system and was in prison (as an adult) within a year of graduating our program. The reason of this focus was to discuss where we went wrong.

Decades later, when I sought recovery (I was an active alcoholic and experimenting with several drugs while working at the above center), I came to realize my several other psychological issues were a direct result of my addictions.

With enough of my story told for now, I will add your story IS IMPORTANT!!! Telling it is not only therapeutic in and of itself but the feedback you'll receive could be very beneficial to your own recovery!

DangerDave 9 Feb 23

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All I know is brain damage from any kind...be it head injury or addictions of any kind...takes a long time and work to rebuild brain cells or revamp misconceptions of reality from a long or short duration! That is what I know for sure...this rest is just day to day living as best as we can!

@DangerDave it looks like you have yourself a challenge before you and having recovered from my spinal leak, that pretty much sucked out my strength and did give me a moments pause. I can assure you, there is 'still life in them there old bones!' Here is the plan...we don't quit until it is over and the way we know that it isn't over...you are still expressing yourself articulately, so just build off of that! Now, if we get a lot of #&$¥&%×@#& ,...then we will start to worry! So leave a contact number!

@DangerDave...as an older person recovering from an illness, I learned, that it really does take longer to regain your strength! And, another force in our subconscious mind, knows that we are aging and running out of time! I find that bringing it to the conscious mind and facing it as a truth...gives momentum! I have regained all my strength and I feel more competent than in recent memory! I value what time I have left, however short or long that may be! And I am just going to do what I do and that's it...We can help our brain (a little struggling matters now), and I get excerise and I am aware of fluids and what food I eat! That is all there is! So by best to you...

@DangerDave I just came across, this quotation that applies to what we have been discussing...'There is no ache more Deadly than the striving to be oneself.' Yevgeniy Vinokurov

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My main problem is the way I come over to people. I also tend to post after a couple of vodkas which is not a good idea.

I have had a couple of private conversations with women on here and the impression they get is absolutely NOT what I'm sending out. I'm feeling very down right now because I seem to be able to piss off people before they've met me.

All advice gratefully received.

(Look, in real life I used to be an upstanding, responsible person. Now I'm retired I'm not. A friend says "This isn't you".)

El-loco Level 7 Feb 23, 2018

@El-loco I used to get into arguments and yes even fistfights when i was drinking, was never a beligerent drunk but like you simply could not relate after several beers. (I could make what I thought was a funny joke and end up fighting, wondering what it was I said that pissed em off so much they would swing on me). I gave up heavy drinking a long time ago and life has been much easier. I don't have that problem when I smoke weed btw...

@RobCampbell I should tell you about my weed experience in The Gambia. In my youth it was much milder, I took three or four puffs and nothing happened. Then it did. If Lisa hadn't had the decency to see me back to the hotel I would still be there. Then the electricity cut off.

@EL-Loco. I have never had chemical addiction problem, but I have been exposed to many (in recovery and otherwise), I do believe that until a person has his own self respect (self knowledge), you will not present your 'real' self to others...because you don't trust that part of your nature (it is foreign) ...you are not really connected to it! Not really convienced of all it's validity! Alcohol changes the brain operation...it is altered! And, maybe that state of being is not who...in your deepest nature that you believe yourself to be! With alcohol...one gives a performance...he is an actor in his own life! Do you really respect the 'false self' that you are presenting to others? And, have you operated against your own actions and principles! My addiction was to another person...co-dependency...'I AM nothing without you,' kinda of thing! I can remember making statements, making critical decisions...completely opposite to what I wanted to do. I had a little voice in my head, that completely overrode what actions and statements that I (vaguely) wanted to make! My 'vague notion,' was overpowered! I had put my nature in the hands of others to affirm and support me as I did not believe that my nature as it was...was good enough, the right kind of person or I was just basically a flawed human being! This caused me great pain and conflict, as i kept trying to operate in the real world! And, suduced by my desporate need for that other person! This is what happens when we create another person (inside us) to help us cope with reality! Once, I found my 'authentic' voice, it has changed everything! My decisions are more appropriate and work better for me and I am not beholding to others! I am responsible for my actions and can adjust them when I need to, without feeling like I will be annihilated OVER them!

@DangerDave Don't resort to suicide. You will live to regret it.

Yes, I'm an alcoholic too.

@DangerDave I said I was an alcoholic. And I didn't lead you to suicide 17 years ago. Completely lost it with Lisa. She owes me!!!

Gonna sober up tomorrow and see if my favourite prostitute will visit.(May need to check my bank account first)

Her name is Suzana and she is the second best prostitute I've ever known.

@El-loco Creeper weed does that, gotta be careful with that. Mostly it just mellows me out after a toke or two. I've noticed that weed is kinda weird in it seems to affect everyone differently. Some freak out, some mellow out, some get the giggles, some hate it, some love it, some just flat out lose it. For me its just an effective stress reliever that I use only moderatly (As the Budda said!), and I've never pissed anyone off smoking a J (except for that idiot Jeff Sessions, the only person I would gladly disrespect and blow smoke in his face if I ever met em).

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Hi, Dave! I love that ritual. Thanks for sharing. We've had some interesting posts here about recovery, 12-step groups etc. @Admin wondering if we can import other posts with their comments into these new groups. As soon as I figure how I'll sign up for this group.

kmdskit3 Level 8 Feb 23, 2018
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I'm also in recovery. 16 months ago I decided that heroin and cocaine should be my higher power. In working the na program I was relieved to hear that I don't need a "god" and that the feeling of being helpful and useful (a new concept to me) can be a good enough higher power. The feeling of knowing that I, a former detriment to everyone, can actually make someone's day easier is a great reward.

Should NOT be**

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Former/recovering alcoholic here. Well met.

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I spent a few years working and teaching Peer Specialists in mental health, so I’d do believe in the need to sometimes tell your story. I don’t know that I’d view this forum as a place for recovery support. However congratulations to you on overcoming and developing your own strength.

Tony80223 Level 7 Feb 23, 2018
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Best wishes and thanks for looking out for others who struggle!

mmcki1 Level 5 Feb 23, 2018
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Thank you for sharing...I'm in the begging stages of writing my memoirs (as I remember them). Thanks for the reminder that Your Story (Mi Cuento) is important. And thanks for being part of the community. Next time I head up to Vegas (Valley of the Fire), maybe we can grab a cup of coffee. (Real coffee...lol!)

Nena Level 6 Feb 23, 2018
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Its all good mate im a recovered ish substance abuser in as much as I still have problems but I don't touch anything anymore and im a big step away from it.

there's normally nothing wrong with weed and it should be legal but I just did a little too much of too much and I'm an all or nothing kind of person.

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