Date who you want, however, remain open to Black men, too. You have experienced horrible things. Try not to stereotype, though. The world is full of wonderful black men, too.

There is nothing wrong with the way you feel but it would be wise to understand why you have those feelings. It reads like you have. I'm reminded you only have one life so you may as well live it to it's fullest. BTW, yes Virginia, we are idiots.

Without much time to read other comments....have you found a survivor of sexual assault group? I think you should consider joining one and talking about this. "Shy, goofy nerd/geeks" need help, too and you've been hurt! I want you to recover. (Sending hugs.)

I have seen white women on dating sites say they are only interested in dating black men or only looking to date other women. It’s really no different than wanting to date thin women or full bodied women, short or tall women. Most people have a phisical preference they gravitate to, even if it isn’t put in stone. Go for what makes you feel comfortable and what you want. I did note that you mentioned several times having a mental illness. I hope it is not related to the assaults and regardless of why, that you are getting help with it. There is non religious support groups and therapists out there, seek them out.

I don't think it is racist. You like who you like, and you're attracted to who you are attracted to.

Love is love. It is color blind. Love well.

Everyone has superficial preferences...some rooted in past experiences. Recognizing it is half the battle anyway. It takes a lot of positive traits to make a match, just concentrate on what makes you happy.

Sounds like you've been traumatized against men who look a certain way. I'm sorry this is how things have been for you. I view racism as more of a situation where the power structure is there to keep the non-favored race in a subordinant position. I don't see your views on dating in that construct.

You like what you like. As long as whomever you are with treats you good, that should be all that matters.

Ok. It's totally understandable. You have to do you. If your stats say that too many black men are a certain way I can't disagree with you. You should live your life the way you want. I feel there are so many problems with the culture of blacks in the US. It doesnt mean all are. For example, most girls wanted a thug for a boyfriend. NO black girls look my way. I don't hate black girls I just view them differently because of my child hood. Dont be afraid to break from culture. Just do YOU! ITS YOUR LIFE! I date all cultures. I'm personally more interested in intellect than looks.

Keep being you. You don't need to explain anything to anyone, especially about who you are, or are not, attracted to. You are great just like you are and should be very proud of yourself for surviving your family nastiness. All people have likes and dislikes about the opposite, and same sex. It's NOBODY's business but yours and the one you love. Be with who you want to be with. And be your authentic self. I hope you heal from the trauma and have a long and happy life.

Ummm........ you have been through so much traumatic stuff that I do not think that you should be concerned about having any form of romantic relationship until you work on yourself I would say that you would probably might want to consider counseling

I don't think liking a particular race is any more racist than liking a particular gender is sexist.
I'm intrigued how you feel about mixed race people though. If people are attracted to different races then that will create more mixed race people, but if no one is particularly into mixed race people that would be sad.

There is only one race as far as people go. And that is the human race.

What difference does it make? If you are attracted to a man, who cares what the race is? If your father treats you like that, why are you in a relationship with him? He apparently is disrespectful and abusive. Do you need that in your life? Also, forgiveness is highly overrated. He doesn't sound like he cares, so why should you? Live your authentic life with no excuses. You will be much happier. Also, j hope you are pursuing help for your mental illness.

"Is it racist to not be at all interested in guys of your same race when it comes to dating?"
For the sake of argument, let's say it is. So? Are you going to date people you don't have a good opinion of? What you do in your personal life is up to you. Furthermore, it wouldn't be fair for the black dude you would be dating unless you are somehow able to see the person beyond the race. So, you not dating people you don't like is a win-win!
What you should be careful about is generalizing from yours and your friends experiences. It's a slippery slope. I hope that is obvious. You don't have to justify your choices, but if you try to do so by maligning a race, I think that is racist. My opinion!

If your not attracted to someone, it's that simple, no explanation required.

If you are attracted to him but won't date do to "lack of interest"... You might have a problem.

Hope I'm being fair.

Oh hell I hope not.

I think so. Whenever you close a race out of the competition ther seems to almost be a fetishist element to it.

You don't have to explain yourself.

I do not think you are using race as a criteria for any of what you say, but the character of the individual and that is absolutely the criteria that EVERYONE should use in all relationships and associations.
To paraphrase a famous American, you are not judging anyone by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

Racism is the belief that by virtue of birth or DNA or genetics one race is superior o another. So my dear sister girl, you do what is right for you. Culturally I would not choose to date an American black man as once was enough. I would date an African American man who fit my criteria. Culturally black American men are similar to men of the 1950's. Stay home, cook, clean & stay pregnant without me being around much. NOT! You my dear are struggling up stream against the tide of black male sexism & I applaud you for demanding your autonomy. This doesn't make on racist. It makes one a strong, independant American woman. Hear me roar. Vote in '18.

It has nothing to do with race.

I have a member who I keep trying not to block simply because he reminds me of a cousin. Sound familiar?

You can't help what experiences you had - but you can be determined to stay away from repeating them.

For you that means something in appearance and behavior.

Is it conceivable you could overcome the trauma? Maybe. But as you still have a sizable dating pool - don't sweat it! There's only so much therapy one wants to have in a lifetime right?

I personally think it's racist to judge you on your dating preference.

To me, from a purely evolutionary, atheistic, genetic point of view. We all evolved our traits in relative isolation for locations we no longer live in, at least the typical non native in America of any race. There's no advantage to keeping bloodlines "pure" and there would be benefit to intermingling thereby spreading specific traits among the general population would lead to an stronger gene pool and deeper genetic diversity.

So whatever trips your trigger, floats your boat (or whatever euphemism you like) is what does it for you. That's not being racist, it's a preference, and arguably better for the species in a modern, globalistic world. (Not that a dating choice is concerned with propagation, at first anyway) With the history you laid out, I'd think its more than reasonable your preference is outside of the race of those men. "Keeping the (insert race here) family" together would seem even more racist to me anyway as it's exclusive to a single race.