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Just wondering, about past experiences. Im on a couple dating sites, and have had several dates with women are church going Christians. My Bio clearly states agnostic, but yet they continue to agree to, even ask for a meet and greet. they say they understand the meaning my beliefs, but once expressed, face to face, you can see the expression change all most instantly. Has any one on here had these same experiences. A couple have even came back for 2nd dates. Most just bail out . LOL

malibu64 4 Oct 11
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35 comments

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2

The meaning, to them, is that you are on the fence and it really doesn't matter. I lived with a woman for 12 years. She was agnostic and I Catholic. It really didn't matter. I did not push my beliefs on her and she even went to mass a couple of times because she liked the ceremony. We broke up when I left religion and became very vocal about environmental issues (and she relapsed with her drinking).
I too have been contacted by women who were religious (i have since left dating sites). Finally, I added atheist to my profile and when a religious person contacted me I told them our different belief systems would make this a no-go. One has to be proactive from the start.

2

Ha! Maybe to them, being agnostic is not as bad as claiming atheism. It leaves some wiggle room for possible conversion. Christians have always been big on conversion!

3

To identify yourself as "Agnostic" specifically identifies you as not being sure about religion. Many (most?) Christians are going to see that as an open invitation to "show you the light of Jesus". I agree with the suggestion that these religious women who want to meet you assume they can convert you and when you appear to be a hard sell they bail. Even if you are on the fence in this regard you might want to try identifying yourself as Atheist which will probably turn off a lot of women but those that respond would seem to be much better candidates.

OCJoe Level 6 Oct 11, 2018

There can be theist agnostics and atheist agnostics. I identify myself as an atheist agnostic.

Ocjoe, exactly what I was going to say.

Pbuck, I keep saying this as well. Claiming that you "know" there is no god is no better than claiming that you "know" there is a god.

I think that people that identify as agnostic or atheist mostly have a different opinion of what that means than believers do.

I identify as an agnostic atheist , meaning while I don't know that there's not some sort of god out there, I certainly don't see any reason to believe in one.

But when you tell a believer you're agnostic, I think that most take that to mean you have no specific religion, but you don't have an opinion one way or the other.
On the other hand, telling a believer you're atheist seems to mean you hate god, reject god, want to destroy god,etc. I think most can't seem to fathom that I don't feel any differently about their god than I do about Santa Claus or The Tooth Fairy.
I may have strong opinions about the ideals of their fictional character, but c'mon... It's fiction people ?

1

Distrust or dislike of atheism or agnosticism is learned behavior, you have to think through why you don't like someone using that as a basis. Dating and courtship, on the other hand, are heavily influenced by raw animal magnetism, which you clearly possess in quantity. 🤓

Please don’t think I’m laughing at you! Your raw animal magnetism just got me in the giggle box! ?

@Beverly256 No worries, I was going for a laugh, though Malibu is obviously a stud. ?

0

You may be viewed as easy to convert,"Putty in their hands".Why do Women want to change a Man? Maybe into their fathers image and habits?

Please don't generalize this to women in general.

@Emerald No,just my opinion on some Women.

@Emerald Word

1

I'm dating someone who is a Jehovah's Witness and before her, I dated a Baptist Christian and before that one, I dated a nondenominational Christian. None of them cared that I didn't believe. The Jehovahs Witness says she believes because it makes her feel better about the loss of her sister and it gives her hope that she can apologize to her. I'm fine with that as long as she keeps her beliefs out of our relationship.

Excellent explanation.

3

These ladies sound like, “Broken wing menders.” They think they can “fix” you if they nurture and care for you enough. I’ve had my share of men who were the same. They thought I was broken from previous unhealthy relationships and all I needed was a “good man to show me the way.” Once I made it perfectly clear that I didn’t need to be fixed, things never worked out.

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Yep. I always post, don't try to evangelize me. Still, they want to. It sucks. All I want is for someone to accept me as I am and someone to accept as he is. Seems I ask too much and get nothing.

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The very nature of their religion tells them to rescue you and straighten you out. If your bio says you are agnostic everyone in church knows that you haven't got a clue about god, or that you just haven't found the right god yet. Yes, agnostics and atheists need to be fixed and evangelized. The believer thinks they just need to be straightened out.

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I would say that there is no base answer, I've had some work out well and others not. as a rule I lean away from the spiritual just because I don't like the disappointment when they realize they can convince me, also I feel a little bad when they realize there is no evidence for any gods and I was the one who took there entire world view and shook it up.

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My experience has been that believers actually think that anyone who identifies as agnostic or atheist just need to hear the 'good words' and they'll be magically converted. I think they believe it gives them brownie points towards 'heaven' if they can save some pagan souls.

Sometimes even includes some superiority. But that's people. I know some non believes that act superior as well. Like political arguing... Hardly ever ends with "oh I see it your way now!" All beliefs and non beliefs are pretty deep rooted and are slow to change. But Christians call that planting seeds, they are taught this is godly work to convert you.

2

I avoid (like the plague? Is that too biblical a simile?) anyone who appears to be somewhat serious about their religion. But I have good friends (some of them women) who are religious but are very cool about it.

As long as they don't intend to convert me, or exercise their religion in a harmful way, I am no longer concerned about it. I am content with being an atheist, no longer care so much about being an antitheist. 🙂

Oh no biblical similes are the best! To understand the potent literary references therein is the only reason to study the Bible, other than more effectively pissing off christians. Best simile in the Bible is Ezekiel 23:19-22 I think, where the good lord saw fit to inspire the comparison: the men of egypt are hung like donkeys and they cum like horses! Apparently it's a pleasure to be a harlot there. Good to know, god. No yelp reviews for where a fella can get some action though? Oh duh, I'll just conquer a neighboring tribe and take their virgins then shall I? Oh god, you're a hoot. ?

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It depends on their level of belief/tolerance. My first wife was tolerant but still wanted to save me. I've dated believers who didn't care about my beliefs but I'm trying to stay away from believers.

3

They think they understand but dont. Reality is not their thing lol

1

I instantly block/delete anyone who claims to be Christian/religious, and if they don't say so in their dating profiles, I ghost them the moment they reveal Christian religious beliefs to me.

I have no reason to argue with or communicate with them further, at all.

1

Maybe they are trying to keep an open mind? That’s hard to say these days. I was raised Christian and date all types of beliefs. I’m agnostic now mainly because the evil I see in those people, not the actual religion itself. Maybe they are looking for a way out?

1

It would seem that clearly they've ignored your beliefs up until that moment. Surprised they don't try harder to convert you! I hope you have better luck in the future. It's definitely worth waiting to find someone who's on the same page.

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Which begs the question of why are YOU wasting your time with this?

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Thanks every one for such a wide variety of answers, suggestions and comments. I know religion, I was raised Baptist, baptised Mormon, and married to 2 catholics LOL

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Lol have some similar expirience they probably wonna to save you, Russian idiom days: religion is an opium for the people's 🙂, evermore I'm not so believer I'm must say that religion is needed but it Almaty always overrated

2

At this point in my life I would not even agree to date a jesus fan boy.

6

Well my experience is that Your lack of belief doesnt matter at first but it will later..
SHe will try to slowly get you into church and praying and oh the headace you will have to go through..

They arent alway honest in the beginning...

3

I usually say something along these lines

hahaha excellet LOL

@malibu64 Well said. I may have to steal that statement.

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I have had the same problem, but never went to meet anyone. Just deleted my profile.
My profile specifically stated no Christians. Made me jokingly think to myself that they were illiterate.

The worst ones nearly all use the King James and read no other book, you should write. "Therefore show thowself not to be likend unto a Christian before my face." They should understand better.

0

I think beliefs are personal matter. u can have 2 people with different beliefs and opinions marry have kids and be very happy. u don't want to marry your twin ! And dating is dating. Many men date for casual friendship and SEX. religion is suppose to unite not divide.

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