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Do you consider yourself a good lover to your partner or spouse and why?

Nardi 7 Oct 25
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35 comments

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10

Hmmmm......being a "good lover" isn't confined to what you do when clothing is off.
Being a "good lover" entails creating a healthy relationship filled with security and support -- emotionally and physically.
I am really surprised that everyone seems to read this question and reduce the whole thing to physical acts performed in the nude. You aren't a "good lover" if you rate yourself on your sexual performance only....you may be great at sex, but not as a complete lover.
Love does NOT equal sexual acts.

The number one key of being a great lover is the ability to listen....and to provide emotional support as needed. If you can't do that, you may be a great fuck, but you will never be a great lover.

well said 🙂

Deep 🙂

9

Absolutely. I love sex. I'm fabulous. Wish someone else knew how good I am. Lol

8

I do consider myself a good lover. I genuinely love him. I am turned on by his body, his mind, his ethics, his parenting skills, his love. There is nobody in the world who I would rather be with. His pleasure is important to me. I am willing to try new things to please him. I would willingly step out of my comfort zone for him. I trust him and respect him. I know that he respects and loves me. I accept him as is with no warranty. He fulfills me in ways I never expected and I strive to do the same for him.

@irascible I am happy to have been helpful in some way. Loving somebody IS awe inspiring. Communication is key to becoming the best you can be for another person. You are on the right path and with your mindset you will only become a better lover!

7

Yes - I’m very attentive and more than happy to be devoted to her pleasure.

6

Hmmm. I’m going with yes. I believe that making a woman comfortable, plenty of fore play, and trying different things to please her goes a long way. To include making her feel beautiful from the moment she wakes up. I believe actually caring about making your partner happy goes a long way. It doesn’t hurt if you enjoy giving oral. I believe in bringing a woman to climax before penetration is key as well. I always try to have a Monday morning quarterback discussion about what she liked, or didn’t like. So that I can improve on future sessions. Communication is key. I’ve learned over the years that women can climax more once you get the ball rolling. The rest are trade secrets. ?

trade secrets is what i'm after lol !

@Nardi well, a woman is like a car in winter. Warm her up before you go full blast. ??

@LetzGetReal I’m not sure what you mean by that. ?

5

My performance during sex depends upon and reflects on the person Im with, I suppose. My ex would probably say im lacking, but he treated me badly. Since I left him, Ive been told otherwise. So fantastic

5

Since the only person I'm doing right now is myself, I'm going to say yes. But that's probably biased.

5

If my wife was into sex, I would do mu best to be a great lover and try to make her satisfied and content. If I ever find a partner will strive to rock her world.

4

Thanks for asking. It's none of your business.

If it's none of my business then there was no point responding unless you either wanted to start an argument or wave a pitch fork like an angry farmer protesting that such a question could be asked!

4

I am not. I'm selfish and distant. I don't give second chances and I don't persue.

4

Everyone thinks they are a good lover.

Untrue! I knew I wasn't for a long time, until I developed some new skills. I was actually quite conscious and humiliated about it, even with my STBXW.

That kind of thinking really does damage to one's psyche, btw.

4

To my late partner absolutely. The simple reason being I was there more for her than myself. What she wanted she got. She didn't have to worry about me because she knew (thought) I was a slam dunk so she could focus on herself. BTW sometimes men fake it!

I relate to this a lot (my partner is currently fighting rheumatoid arthritis). Hope you find happiness again x

4

Yes, passionate sex two or three times a day that last long. I make sure she's exhausted before she goes to sleep. Nothing make a women happier than that.
and I'm free to date outside the relationship so it's the ultimate relationship for both of us.

4

I was, when i had one. In my younger years, I made it my "business" to find out what guys Really like!

3

I would like to think so. My ex-husband and anyone after him will agree. I've always treated those in my life with respect. My ex-husband cheated on me, not because I wasn't a good lover, but because he was deployed over 6 times in less than 4 years. I forgave him, but I chose to divorce him because he crossed the line with whom he cheated on me with. Had it been any random person, I might have forgiven him. My ex-boyfriend, whom I met after my divorce, might tell you I was a good lover. After 2 years of dating, he asked me to come with him to California. He was being stationed there to be a 1st Sgt for the Army. I had just taken a job with the State of Texas, good pay, benefits, and I had just transferred my military time in service into my retirement plan with the State so I could retire early. I had to let my ex-boyfriend whom asked me to marry him on the same day he told me he was asked to get ready to go to California a few months later. I chose my job. Bad timing. Had I known he was going to ask me to marry him prior to me accepting my job, I might have gone with him. We kept in touch, but I decided to cease all communication. I don't do long-distance relationships.

FYI my ex-husband and I are cordial. Took 8 years for him to accept that I had good reason to divorce him. I never lied, cheated, or stole from him. He was just butt-hurt that I chose not to want him in my life. He found a wonderful girl that loves him as much as I did and whom loves our kids. I'm happy he's happy. He thinks I haven't remarried because of what he did and that I'm scarred. Uumm... nope. I don't want to get married again because it's expensive as f**k to get a divorce! 😅

@SleeplessInTexas Seems like you are kind of content with your life now but could you, if it happened again, improve the way you love your significant other?

@Nardi improve? lol

@SleeplessInTexas yes improve, maybe not just you but maybe your other half too?

3

I can say all I want but that's a question for the other half to answer

3

I'll have to find a partner and get back with you ?

3

I would hope so @DoDapper

I have kept you, with reason.

3

Never has the nausea emoticon been more welcome.

sorry you feel that way but there is a 'grrr angry' emoticon which is not the same but still a dislike.

@Donotbelieve I expect to lose friends over this. 😛

@Donotbelieve I thought I was doing pretty well. I hope the 'cake' you're 'baking' is going well btw. 😉

@Donotbelieve Be sure to let us know when it's cooked. x

2

Yes, because I give attention in so many different, sensual through bruisingly rough, consentual ways.
(@coralisthree)

2

Right now, not at all. My wife is pregnant, and our emotional intimacy is null and void. Most of our time is spent rounding up our kids, coping through isolation into our iPhones, and avoiding each other. We are going to go to a counselor, but it may be too late.

Try the counciling. It can really help.

Counseling will only work if you BOTH want it to work !!! Keep THAT in mind 😉 If you believe it's already too late , counseling will only reinforce that fact.

2

I'm kind of a jerk but yes when we get down to it I've got what she wants and give er all I've got

2

From what I read on Yelp I'm pretty good with both of them. ?

2

Yes, cause when we are done, we're both satisfied.

2

I think so. I tend to focus on my partner and their pleasure

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