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I was doing some reading about men being afraid to flirt and approach women. It reminds me of a time when I was approached in a parking lot by a man. He was around my age at the time, 30 or so. I had just bought curtains for my new apartment and I was loading them inside my car, along with my child and his things. The man approched me with his arms raised, and was asking me to remain calm, saying he was not going to hurt me. I stood there and looked in disbelief wondering what the hell was going on. So, he just asked me for a cup of coffee and I agreed. I still do not understand why that instance took place, but I was wondering what the men think? Are men worried about the legal repercussion of approaching a woman? #metoo, Harvey Weinstein, Bill Cosby, that guy from the today show...have women made such examples of men in hollywood that the average man, is now to worried about what will become of him if he approaches a woman?

ShellyBean 6 Feb 20
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59 comments (51 - 59)

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1

YES, THEY ARE AFRAID....Now, while some men are out there to harm you many more are not.

Women need to understand the difference between harassment and a compliment. In Latin America, for instance, to say to a lady "GOOD BYE, PRETTY..." is not perceived as harassment but as a compliment.

1

I had a woman on a dating site that I messaged and introduced myself and asked about flea markets in her town. She answered with just no so I asked about antique shops in the area. Got the answer back that if I didn't quit harassing her she'd report me.

Ignorance comes in all colors and sizes

1

I do have insecurities partially because of the laws and being accused of something.

1

Men need to understand that keeping your hands to yourself and your junk in your pants is the best way to make a good impression.

1

Men have to deal with the stigma of being wrong during the 11 seconds of fame. It is true (at least from my point of view at 50 years old). "Treat others that you yourself would be treated" no longer seems relevant because of the #metoo.

0

There is absolutely a fear of men in a lot of women. I think this is a new thing, but some women seem to think the only men who aren't serial rapists are murderers. I don't see this as only a problem with males. This fear is almost completely irrational but instead of being a mental illness it is supported by society. An entire gender is being judged by some of our worst examples.
The point is a cat lady who can barely leave the house isn't due to men and girls who freak out by approach or even persistence are responsible for their feelings not some guy hitting her up.

0

Yes we are. its a roll of the dice

0

Not sure if I ever truly 'flirt' . Express interest but not flirt? Otherwise I try to always listen for the word 'no' . Sometimes it's body language which can be more difficult. If I'm not sure I ask. I also need to see where I am at. Sometimes it's better to not even try. Kind where I am at right now.

0

We live in an age of professed equality , at least as a goal , & yet women still are under the impression that they are to be approached , & never the other way around . This is not the mentality of a mind that seeks to be equal , & yet , conflicting values persist . I'm at a loss for words , like that Jerry Sinefeld joke , where men are beeping their horns at strange women , that they would like to converse with , but are out of ideas , thus , they beep the horn , as if to ask , "Now what ?" "I'm out of ideas".
I don't beep my horn at strange women , but I have to admit , for the majority of my life , until about 20 years ago , I was out of ideas . As women age , they play fewer games , & are more assertive as to what they want in a partner , at least for the most part . . . They can maintain what they are shown & taught , to remain what they are shown & taught , as feminine , or they can be equal , & make the first move , at least from time to time .
But to answer your question , the new trend has encouraged them to do what they know , is , equal . It's that simple , & for guys like me , it's actually refreshing , to see the majority having to practice what they've been preaching since the 60's. Making the first move , should not be felt as uneffeminate . If it does , then you are dealing with the bonds of a gender roll that dates back to at least the 50's , if not beyond . SAD 😟

Dougy Level 7 Feb 20, 2018
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