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Growing up in a secular family, I was not indoctrinated into any religious or theistic beliefs.
Unfortunately that means I can never be an apostate. I will never experience the thrill of being excommunicated, disfellowshipped, or even the joys of shunning a loved one.
Alas, I will never feel shame for my thoughts or experience the fear of Dante's Inferno.
I will live this life being the best person I can be because it is the only life I will ever have.
And that is good.
Sayeth me.

dumasarok 7 July 17
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23 comments

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8

I get what you're saying, but this also seems a little flippant to me, only because people who have grown up in very restricted religious families and found their way out often deal with some very difficult stuff that isn't easy to overcome. Trauma, abuse, and shunning are just three things that come to mind regarding what many have had to face.

Growing up Jewish I'd always felt like an outsider. But as we were Reform bordering on secular and for me it's always been more of a cultural thing more than anything else, I saw what strict religion did to ultra Orthodox Jews who wanted to leave, and it was just about as bad as anyone raised in a strict Christian household. I also have a friend who was raised Scientologist and the control there is not much different either... Any belief system that puts faith before free will and family and demands blind adherence to rules and doctrine is frightening to me, and I can't imagine anyone growing up with this having to deal with it. I applaud anyone's who's made the effort to find out for themselves what's right and wrong, and lives their truth despite their upbringing and loss of family support.

8

Since I was baptized as a Catholic as a baby, I will always be counted as a Catholic according to The Roman Catholic Church. You used to be able to file a Declaration of Defection to get removed from their roster, but so many people were defecting that the church stopped that process in 2009 and now there is no way to formally defect. The Church wants to make their attendance numbers look high even at the cost of lying by disguising the accurate number of real members.

There was a "Count Me Out" movement in Ireland that precipitated the Church denying formal defections.They just want to artificially inflate their membership since so many people were/are leaving. From Wikipedia" "single acts of apostasy, heresy or schism (which can be repented) do not necessarily involve also a decision to leave the Church, and so "do not in themselves constitute a formal act of defection if they are not externally concretized and manifested to the ecclesiastical authority in the required manner""

It's all BS - better to just leave and say MEH..... The only way the Catholic membership rolls will be reduced is over time as less and less people get their babies baptized. I was at the tail end of my belief when my oldest was born, so I had her baptized..... but by the time the next one was born, I refused, so both my sons are unbaptized (unless you count my mom baptizing them in the kitchen sink because I refused - yes she actually did that).

7

umm you found a way to make a positive thing into a woe is me thing. Being shunned by one's family or loved ones or even community is not as fun and exhilarating as you may think. But why take it from someone that was indoctrinated into that fckery and constantly has to deal with family members trying to convert me back? This is truly the life! wheee heavy sarcasm -_-

6

Your one of the few lucky ones. Unfortunately a lot of children are indoctrinated from an early age. Without that I seriously doubt there would be very many religious people.

5

I am sure someone can lay a beating on you ... if you really want to try it.....

blzjz Level 7 July 17, 2019
5

I keep trying to tell my family that I'm an apostate, it's best to just drop it, I can't be saved, I hereby officially blaspheme the holy Spirit, etc. They just won't stop trying. I kinda wish they'd excommunicate me.

5

Cool. I will say it doesn't happen that way all the time. You could have been a person like me. Wake up one morning and say "what the fuck am I doing?".😂

4

You are fortunate. Unlearning the brainwashing I received as a child was a very hard thing to do!

But it was worth it! 🙂

4

That's great. Have fun burning in HELL, non-believer!

@avron There's plenty of room for all of us. Bring a friend and Satan will waive the entry fee.

4

I was christened as a baby and I believe that there are dechristening forms that can be copied from the internet, but why bother.It's a load of nonsense anyway.

Yes! I just commented that I got an in-baptism certificate years ago

3

I don’t think it would be a good experience to be shunned by one’s family, and thankfully, like you never having had a belief, never have been. I realise you are speaking in a lighthearted manner, but I think to some this may be a painful topic.

3

Great attitude you have there. Wish more people felt like you do.

3

Same

GwenC Level 7 July 17, 2019
2

Off topic, or is it. I have shunned most of my family for having almost religious belief in something I consider evil in it's intent and execution. BREXIT.

Savage Level 7 July 17, 2019

Thankfully we all sing from the same hymn sheet in my family!

2

Lol. You don't know what your missing out on. Lol

t1nick Level 8 July 17, 2019
2

Same here!

Remi Level 7 July 17, 2019
2

Hahahahaha that's awesome

RaiGab Level 5 July 17, 2019
1

WHY do people put all this faux importance on bullshit little ceremonies and rituals? We are ALL going to the same place. period. No human ceremony or ritual or act or saying or anything will change that. duh. The only thing we can do is prepare ourselves for it and guide how we live before it happens. That's where religion comes in. In theory we choose our own path but in reality it's often chosen for us before we're even born. you were done a favor even if it doesn't seem so.

1

My family attended a Congregational church but it fulfilled many more secular than theological purposes. I never got the impression my parents were deeply, or even shallowly, Believers. That upbringing made it much simpler to jump from "there is possibly a God and He may be keeping an eye on me" to "if there is a God, which I seriously doubt, He and I don't cross paths."

0

The church had Sunday School, and sister and I were put in it. After 2nd grade, the church told my Dad that, if I was to continue, he, my Dad had to teach 3rd grade SS because I had so annoyed the teacher with my questions contradicting the Biblical stories.

0

When my belief started going South I thought for sure I'd get kicked out. My husband-at-the-time even did the favor of reporting me to church authorities and suggesting to them that they ought to excommunicate me. Unfortunately, the church leaders were a bit more lenient than him. Not so much as a slap on the wrist. In the end, I had to withdraw my membership myself.

I got plenty of the shunning and shame, though. More than my fair share, perhaps.

0

...yep like other personal growth its worth
the effort to be free...

BBJong Level 7 July 17, 2019
0

I was baptized Catholic but I don’t recall EVER going to church unless it was for a wedding or funeral.

I did happen to see a link online years ago to get in-baptized and did that

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