Has anyone else out there spent a relationship or two, however short lived, with someone who fits the Cluster B Personality Disorders profile of a psychopath? Narcissistic Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, etc.? If so, what have you done to recover? How successful have you been? And how long has it been?
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Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.17 years. The last 5 is when he decided being unmedicated was better for him. He forgot I owned my own home so I was not dependent on him financially. I left.
I cut him out of my life completely. Blocked him on every social media platform possible. Changed all my passwords since he had stolen all of them (he was an IT guy). Loaded all photos & docs to my email & left my computer sans hard drive. I have yet to buy a new laptop or tower & it's been 7 years since I left.
Most days he doesn't cross my mind. I gleaned the lessons I needed to learn & incorporate in my life so I don't make those mistakes again & let everything else go. Unless someone asks about him, he is a non-entity. When I am asked about him, I just say I don't know, we aren't friends.
Once I heard the opposite of love is not hate. Its apathy. I believe that because to hate someone means you still have an emotional investment. I cannot waste time & energy allowing him to still have that power over me. Living well really is the best revenge.
SallyInStitches
Level 7
Aug 5, 2019
3
33 oblivious years with last (and I mean Last!) hubby.....he seemed so much better than hubby #1 because he did not beat the crap out of me 3-4 times a week, actually never. But in hindsight, I would say physical bruises heal, the mental pain inflicted by these "there must be something wrong with You" weasels is far harder to recover from.
However, I can say that the last 9 years, after a year of intense counseling) have been the very best of my life! I still fight the demons he saddled me with when things go awry, but I have the strength to do it! Big shout-out not only to my counselor but also the woman who "stole" him! Good luck, girl!
AnneWimsey
Level 9
Aug 5, 2019
0
Time and zero contact, block all communication, get rid of items that act as reminders, if at all possible. Not sure my problem mate had all the same disorders as yours, but some for sure.
We were together off/on for 8 years. I ended it 18 months ago and did very well for 6 months, with no contact, until he knocked on my door one day and imposed himself on my life again. That only lasted a few months.
Going on a few months again apart, without him being in the same state as me. Unfortunately, he pulled one of his common tricks and left something in my care, so I will have to see him upon his return, but I am determined that we will NOT be together when he returns. Not doing that again.
Time and zero contact... and month by month I can recover. (Kinda like learning to deal with PTSD)
Julie808
Level 8
Aug 5, 2019
2
@Bierbasstard Not in this particular case, but definitely it it ever comes up in the future. I can leave this item with his roommate before he returns, if it seems the best thing to do. Will cross that bridge when I come to it.
Thank goodness we no longer share a storage unit, and I said no when he asked if he could keep some items in mine while he was gone this time.
Many baby steps and great leaps to create a chasm between us, but on a small island it's hard to escape bumping into one another frequently. Gotta keep it civil, but a hard line "no" to getting friendly again. 
It would be best to avoid that person in a cold-turkey, common sense way. And avoid all triggers, i.e., reminders, of that person. That is my experience and it works quickly.
AnonySchmoose
Level 8
Aug 4, 2019
1
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