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I took myself to lunch !

When I was still dating an over-the-top god person, we discovered this fun, and reasonably healthy restaurant, that we had frequented now and then. Due to our vast unworkable differences regarding religion - the relationship ended almost a year ago now, but I missed the restaurant !

So the other day, I went to a cool art fair that happened to be close to the eatery, and decided to go eat alone. I came armed with a good book, got my food (buffet style), and settled in to a cozy booth for two. Though it was busy, I felt comfy in the little booth. I had forgotten just how pleasant dating one's self can be.

Have you ever tried it ? A good way to treat yourself !

evergreen 8 Sep 24
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28 comments

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12

I am the best date that I have been out with. 😁😁. I even went home with myself on the first date, and I still respected myself in the morning.

You sound like the Tom Waits song " Better Off Without A Wife".

6

I had a date with a college professor, and she asked me if my atheism might be due to my father's influence growing up. I confessed that he probably did influence that, and she suggested that I could get 'help' to fix that. I asked her if her father influenced her devout Christianity, and she agreed, so I suggested that she get 'help' to fix that. What started as a very possible romance ended for me when she asked that question.

6

I go to concerts, movies, museums, cultural events and such on my own. With family far away I travel long multi-leg flights on my own. There is a wonderful freedom and peace in experiencing events and making decisions just as you wish, and I strike up conversations easily and meet the nicest folks that way. Somehow, I do struggle with attending a restaurant on my own, which I plan to overcome in my recovery time off in a couple months. Seems like a fine time to do things differently!

I eat alone all the time. If it’s difficult, go to a place that has a bar and eat there. You won’t be obviously alone, and not the only single either. Many nice brew bumps w nice bars and good food. It’s also better for the server, they dread a low one person tip table.

Oh - I do too. I discovered early on, it's better to go to all kinds of things alone than to be with someone else just for the sake of accompaniment . And I generally don't eat out much at all - much healthier to make my own stuff ! But eating out alone was something I hadn't done in a long time - and it was refreshingly nice !

6

Good for you!!! I do believe this is a good thing to do for yourself. Nice that you went back to the "reasonably healthy restaurant"!!! I too have started going out on my own. In fact today, I treated myself to a hair appointment and afterwards decided I needed a pedicure as well. It was nice just having a few hours doing something for myself.

Good for you!!!
I'm glad you tended to yourself. You deserve it.

5

I go into restaurants from time to time with just me. Sometimes as a treat, sometimes as a girl has to eat and eating in the car is not an option for me. I try to take a book/tablet with me, or grab a newspaper. Whether with someone or alone, we still gotta eat.

5

It was ok for a while after my wife was separated from me with her dementia getting really bad, but it was not that long before I remembered how lonely it was for me before I met her and how much we used to enjoy being together before she got dementia. Since then, now that I have actually had some real dates lately, I really enjoy being with someone to experience them together and have a companion. Everyone is wired differently, I guess.

4

I take myself out to lunch a few times a week. I usually go a little after the lunch hour when it's less crowded And I never go to restaurants that don't have booths. It's like a little nest you can cuddle up in for the duration. The only time I don't enjoy this is when they seat loud talkers right next to me because I don't like being a captive audience to other people's conversations

4

When I could still drive, I would often do things by myself.
I'd eat out, go to movies, and a whole host of other things I enjoyed.
One of my favorite things to do was go on road trips by myself.
I've always been happy being left to my own devices.

While it's usually fun to do things with friends and family,
I really miss the freedom to just get up and go off by myself.

I love road trips by myself too. I always loved the solitude. I also get to play all my favorite CD's and drive as long as I want to. I'm sad that you can't do that anymore.

4

I was an outside sales rep for years-many overnights and lots of eating alone. Would usually sit at the bar and befriend the bartender. Never sat at a table or booth by myself unless I was feeling non-social. I guess I've always been a social butterfly-got great business leads at the bar!

4

Have I ever tried it? 😁😁😁😁 Almost every day

3

Yes...I have adapted to life on my own. I sometimes just take myself off for the day somewhere, and usually find a nice place to eat. It’s not a big deal really, but I still prefer dining with my girlfriends if really given a choice.

3

These days, it's just me more often than not. One thing about it, it's a LOT cheaper.

3

All the time. No agendas and expectations of talking drivel just because you happen to share the same space.

It’s ideal.

3

I always wanted to see Book of Mormon. Last March when it came to the Bass Hall in Ft. Worth I made a last minute decision to go by myself. Looked online Saturday for the Sunday evening performance. Almost sold out, but some excellent single seats available. Easier to purchase one seat. Great seat, great show.

3

I frequently go to restaurants alone. I also take a book.

CS60 Level 7 Sep 24, 2019
2

Many years ago I read a book called, "The Artist's Way" by Julia Cameron. She recommends that we set up a time to have a date with ourselves every week. I tried it, but I kept taking myself to cheesy movies, bad restaurants, and loud concerts. It was when I asked myself to meet my parents that I knew I had taken it too far.

2

I'm a big fan of going out on my own. Why should I hold off doing something or trying something new just because I can't find someone to do with me. There's a lot of great things I would have missed out on if I passed on them just because I was alone.

So true !

2

Dating yourself makes several things easier. The last person I dated hated fish and seafood, where I love it. Compromise is a big part of a relationship, but sometimes you gotta get your lobster fix!

I happen to eat only plant based stuff - so it's nice not having to have that discussion about why. And I always enjoy my company !

2

I go to lunch, the movies, even vacation by myself all the time. I was in a similar situation. My ex-husband and I were not on the same page with anything near the end and I ended up sequestering myself in the house because he would rarely go out. Once we split, I started slowly with lunch and eventually worked myself up to a solo vacation down Hwy 1. It was the BEST vacay ever! I'm pgoing on another one sometime this fall. Good for you!

2

If you are happy why not

bobwjr Level 10 Sep 25, 2019
2

I eat alone in restaurants ALL THE TIME. Recently I've been taking women out to eat just for the company and conversation.

2

A couple of times I went on months-long job assignments in distant parts of the US.
My wife came to visit each time about halfway through -- once company-paid, once we paid.

Both I stranded in Houston and Ft Lauderdale, and my wife stuck back home in Phoenix, took ourselves out to eat sometimes to discourage tedium. We're both independent adults and didn't have too much trouble getting through.

The biggest problem was probably my wife's reaction when I got back -- emotionally for her it was 'What the hell are you doing in my house?'. Ha, ha.😊

The biggest pleasant surprise was that a dog we'd gotten a couple of days before I left one time remembered me -- I was sure she'd forget but she got so excited when I returned that I was briefly afraid she might hurt herself. Ha, ha.😊

1

Yess! I take myself out to eat and I go to the movies by myself! It’s one of my favorite things to do. I don’t have to wait on anyone, I always get to choose the movie, but the only problem is I never know what I want to eat haha 🤦🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️.

Yeah - doing movies solo is something I find very satisfying. Definitely better than going with someone who is not as into it as you might be !

@evergreen so true! I loved the secret life of dogs, but when my friend saw it she said she wanted to kill herself it was so boring🤦🏾♀️.

@FinallyFreed perfect example !

1

I do take myself out to lunch from time to time, but lately also to concerts and festivals, that I used to attend with my ex-boyfriend. He's been off-island for 4 months, so I've been able to go anywhere I like alone without worrying that I'll run into him. 🙂

He's coming back in a couple of weeks, so I'm going to make the most of my time and attend some events coming up with no stress.

Then after he returns, we'll likely have to check with each other, as we've done in the past, to avoid the very bad result of being in the same place at the same time, though not together, where he possessively stalks me which irritates his date, if he has one, or throws us together, which is not good either

So, I'm making the most of these next couple of weeks, since I'll be skipping half the events I love, once he returns. There is a bit of good and bad with knowing all the places an ex frequents. I'm fine with avoiding places I don't like anyway, but when I have to give up events I love, that's a sacrifice.

Then it sounds like he'll be moving off island in May, so then, my life will be all mine. Taking myself out to lunch to celebrate my freedom will likely become a common event for me! 🙂

1

I have and still do! I love it!

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