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The Top Ten Things a Man would like To Hear From a Woman, Wife, GF or Significant Other...but probably won't

  1. You had 5 beers left in the fridge, but it was on sale, so went ahead and bought another case.
  2. You know, I really don’t think it is a good idea for my mother to move in with us, do you?
  3. Even though Pretty Woman is on the movie channel, let’s watch MMA instead, I know your favorite fighter is on there tonight.
  4. It really doesn’t matter if we go to church or not, let’s just have a brunch with steak and eggs Benedict, some bloody mary’s and go back to bed.
  5. Your hairy belly is so sexy, I could just lick you.
  6. I wonder who first found out that getting a mouthful was so much fun?
  7. I think restoring a vintage car in the garage is a great idea. I can just park outside.
  8. Let’s play Deathmatch Doom, I just love killing Imps
  9. You were right, it feels great doing it that way and it doesn’t hurt a bit
  10. I’m bored, let’s shave my _____.
GuyKeith 8 May 8
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6 comments

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0

that's hilarious - #7 work very well for me. #6 is interesting....is it her belly hair or his? 😉

His, of course. This is an old post and probably got me blocked by several people.

1

You're funny! Although I would probably actually do 10, 9, 7 (I'm obviously not a church goer and I love a good Bloody) and 1.

I about died laughing at 6!

3

AAAANNNDDD that's why he's single!

Actually, a widower, married 34 years.

1

I'm sure there are some men who would love all of these . But many more that would definitely be quite happy with some of them !

0

I do think #4 is a great idea! Could I help?

Some of the others, meh

It was written as satire, to elicit a chuckle or outrage. Thanks for reading.

@GuyKeith No vintage car sniff 😉

@pixiedust

I live in MN where it snows for 6 months out of the year.....not giving up a garage stall! However I'd be happy to have you build a man-garage for said vintage cars.

@GuyKeith I feel much better now 🙂 Is it yours?

@pixiedust It was. I no longer have it 😟

1

You must live in a weird household?

Mostly satire, man.

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