I have three kids. Two are grown and one is 16. I have dated several women with kids. I have had mixed results with trying to blend all of the pieces together. IMO dating a woman with kids changes the way a relationship develops. Decisions have to be made more carefully because young hearts could be effected if things don't work out. So one must be fairly certain that the relationship will be healthy and long lasting prior to getting the kids introduced to their counterparts. There is also a responsibility and resulting commitment of time to the kids that both parents must allow for each other. Consequently the relationship develops more slowly compared to a situation with no kids.

Having said that I have plans to travel after i get my youngest situated in college. So I really don't want to get serious with anyone who has kids younger than 16.

If you can't like the offspring of someone that you claim to like - then in my opinion you are just a self-serving A-hole.

I personally don't want to sire kids, but I'm open to dating a woman with kids.
However, my reluctance to have kids has been off-putting to some women who interprete it as not liking kids.
shrugs

Four things that place a guy in the "NO" category.

Believer
Kids
Too young
Distance

I never wanted kids so to be with somebody who has them is a big NO....unless, of course, the kids are over 21 y/o.

It is more about the person than the kids. There are people that it is an absolute "No. Thank you very much." But that is because there are underlying issues around why they are single to begin with. Adding children into that situation is very bad.

I put maybe as I have s 3 year old and his mum's kids made my life hell ...long story ....so not sure if I could do it again if I'm honest I'm not even sure I will date again at the moment

This is a more complicated question than yes/no/maybe.

How many kids? What age(s)? Is the person divorced or a widow/widower? Do they have serious impulse control or attachment issues? How about debt? Do they actually have a life outside their kids or are they going to expect every date take place with kids in tow?

There's a long history of relationships falling apart after children are born because the couple starts neglecting each other in favor of spending their time/energy on their kids. It shouldn't be surprising that single people wouldn't want to jump directly into exactly that scenario

I dated a girl my age who reminded me constantly that she "had to accept" or "deal with" the fact that I had a kid and a divorce under my belt. She treated it like she got "points" for "being able to do that." Which is insane. You don't get points at all for accepting someone who has kids. Sure, you get points for being great with said kids, but nobody is handing out medals for sacrificing and just dating someone with a kid. Things didn't last long with her.

I can't win either way/
My kids are grown now,
but when they were younger I did have issues from women who did not have kids and just did not understand who a single parent family works.
Then the ladies I went out with that did have kids,
all had problem kids.
Problems at school, behavour problems at home,
not wanting mum to have time for herself, then if they were older, trouble with the law and/or drugs.
It turned out easier to stay single.

Yes, but I have kids. It does make any sort of a social life much more difficult. If the person you are dating has custody fun with you time and sex time won't be their priority. Its just a fact of having kids around. Of course "baggage" is a disrespectful way to refer to children, but "amazing little human beings who you would be lucky to meet" is greatly romanticizing the situation.

I have an 11 year old daughter. Beware the constant giggling, chatting, questions, hanging on, tagging along....... I’m sure I’ll miss it when it’s over.
If you have a problem with kids, then you probably should move to a desert island and live in a hut.

Maybe. The kids would definitely have to be older (teens or above).

Wow. As a 42 year old with a 5yo, I find these comments disheartening. Just because I waited until later for the right time to start my family, shouldn't mean I'm undateable. ?

when I was single, I found it very difficult to date someone with children. Almost every first date I've had planned with someone who had children was canceled. I understand that their kids come first, but I always felt as though I was somewhere beyond the back burner. The few women I did date with children, I was so far away from being a priority in their lives that I started refusing to date anyone with kids. Maybe it's because I don't have kids, and I just don't understand where they're coming from.

Wouldn't bother me although it could complicate things. Probably unlikely but I guess I could really like a woman but not like her kids. Maybe?

Children under 18 has always been and will always be a deal-breaker for me.
I have never lived with children other than my younger sister when we were children.
I don't like them in the house and, from what I hear, they cost a lot of money and suck the life out of you.

Under most circumstances no, but an exception could be made if the kids are grown up. I refuse to raise (be a surrogate father to) another man's offspring.

Yes but I prefer if they’re older. My girls are 19 and 17 so I’m not really interested in helping to raise more kids for the next 15 years

Well, I did. And I married her.
Her two kids (and now one grandson) provide great entertainment. I pretty much think of them as 'ours'. Unless they screw up... then they revert to 'hers'.

Maybe!

1. I'm not dating.
2. I don't have kids...cause I didn't want kids after like 26.
3. If they didn't get the world needs less humans than more then I wouldn't be dating them anyway.
4. unless they adopted or for some reason had children because they are improving the world ... an not because they were selfish.

I like kids but i couldnt eat a whole one

It certainly wouldnt be a deal breaker but most (not all but most) women around my age have grown up kids - like i do. Women with kids at home are probably more interested in my son than me

I grew up religious and thought that flirtation of any kind was a sin until I got to college and became an atheist, so my social skills and whatnot are severley stunted and I’m not even sure how ready I am to date effectively let alone navigate a relationship where I have to think about someones children too.

Very off putting. I don't want kids, and I don't want to help someone raise their kids. You can call me selfish, picky, inconsiderate, asshole, or whatever; but it's my life. I'll choose to live it the way I want.

Don't get me wrong though. Kids can be cool and funny, but they can also be little destructive monsters. I work with kids (and their parents), so I don't want to have to come home to more kids.

Someone with older kids like mine