So what is the next step

Their “conservative “ views are rooted in bigoted christian ideologies, good riddance to them.....

I really needed to see this post. I just had a bad experience with a person commenting on my post. My post was not intended to gather ire. It was more of an outlet for myself and how to handle my situation. My situation is not one many in society would approve of, however, it was only intended to post down my thoughts. I have made it private now and written to the person offended or angry about it. It had nothing to do with anyone but me. It was not condemning anyone or ugly. It was about my relationships. I find it sad people say ugly things to one another. When I post I prefer keeping in on a level that is civil and not ugly. What I got was pure ugliness. I like what you lhave to say and appreciate it highly. I look foward to any updates.

Thank you for the post. You should participate more often.

Lots to think about. But, whatever you wanna do is fine with me. If a new feature is used you will know it is good, and presented well.

If not, it may be in the presentation and not the substance.

In any case, you should at least allow donations.

“...to help bridge the growing divide in society. My thought was if I could raise the view of non-believers in the eyes of religious people...”

A noble cause indeed; one I support 100%. But that is only one half of the task. You don’t save a marriage by talking only one member out of their contemptuous ways, and giving the other partner no support. It’s a two-way street.

What goes on in this site is not in view of any religious eyes. They aren’t welcome here.
And for the nearly two years I’ve been trying, I’ve had approximately zero success at raising the view of religious people in the eyes of non-believers.

People don’t come here to sacrifice themselves to those “inhuman others”. They come here to vent about them and lick their wounds. Same goes for the political divide.

I admire your desire to heal this problem, but I have to admit I have doubts that twitbook, whether it’s embraced or ignored, will solve that particular problem. I don’t think it’s status updates that we crave, but maybe status itself.

One thing I’ve noticed in my time here is how attuned we humanoids are, myself included though I’m loath to admit it, to the status conferred by points and levels.

If a point system could be devised by which members could assess each other’s “relative tribalosity” based on, for example, a three position rating - up, down, or neutral - with cumulative “T” ratings visible on the person’s profile, (you rate per member, not per encounter, but you can change that rating as often as you like) and higher cumulative ratings would gain access to site features not available to lower rated members...
who knows? Maybe people would compete by learning how to be civil?

Nah! They’d prolly compete to see who could keep the lowest score! Oh well, I tried.

I have confidence in your insight.
We ,in my family have that NEUTRAL TERRITORY.
I firmly believe in honesty and self discipline, so i
almost always refrain from a negitive OR attack comment.
I am here to learn and grow- i don't restrict the
of this knowledge ¤ If i cannot control my words~what do
i control.
P.S. I have seen similar data facets sited
through other sources.

Perhaps we should do the Jewish thing and demand a land for ourselves?

I've been kind of a negative guy since my father passed in 1960, Mom raised 4 boys by herself, never remarried. It was just one struggle after another, mostly with money. We all stayed in 1 bedroom.......yeah, i have a chip on my shoulder...BUT......i've had some good times too. i regret getting married but I ended up with 2 magical daughters who are doing very well. I hardly believe they are my kids. NOW......today, it is very sad. The world seems very dark and I worry for my grand kids. I don't see it getting any better. I'm better than I was 20 years ago, I don't worry like I used to, and life is getting shorter and shorter.....but wow......Trump ain't helping matters. We have all this bullshit going on with the politicians.....and wow....watch the news coming from the Sudan!!! There are so many people starving to death......and just trying to find some food and a pair of shoes.....THERE ARE TOO MANY FUCKING PEOPLE!!! SAUDI ARABIA AIN'T DOING ANYTHING, DUBAI AIN'T DOING ANYTHING.......and the whole world wants America to solve their problems. This guy told me that 65 million people want to come to America!! Geez, I wonder why? Well, one thing, here in America if you want to rip a page out of the Bible and use it for butt-wipe.....YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT GETTING YOUR FUCKING HEAD CUT OFF!!! (.......hey, wait a minute.....maybe YOU DO!!). Organized religions and the struggle for power, greed......it's ruining the world. We will not be here as long as the dinosaurs were.

I'm sorry if our conservative members are feeling bad. I don't remember any ad hominem attacks, but if that's happening it should stop.
On the other hand, I fail to see what a "conservative" would be doing here, if by that you mean religious. If you mean politically rightist, again, it's hard to reconcile that with a group of agnostics and atheists, because Republicans are the antithsis of godlessness.
But okay, if some members think these people are trolls, they can't be blamed, but neither does it give anyone the right to disrespect them. I admit I'm confused.
As far as getting believers to think agnostics and atheists are "good people," good luck. Speaking personally for myself only, I could care less what they think. Nor do I engage them in debates or call attention to myself in any way. I just go about my business and mind my own. In fact, people without a religious affiliation are now the majority in this country. Why should I feel defensive and want to convince anybody of my goodness?
So I suppose overall I don't understand your concern, but I DO ask all fellow members to express disagreements based on issues and refrain from personal attacks.

Give it a try, after all if it helps that's a good thing, if not, hey you gave it a shot!

125 comments on this at the moment. Maybe the discussion has gone on long enough and it’s time to take some action and just see how it goes.

I've seen both nasty liberals, libertarians, progressives, conservatives, and just plain trolls on here. It's difficult to argue against a great number of "left-leaning" individuals on this site, because they are a greater number in population than conservatives. Some people are looking to fight, troll, and post their opinions without concern for opinions that aren't theirs.

I'd love to say that just being "Agnostic" means we're more open to questioning everything... Including politics. However, politics, like religion is learned from our parents and environment as much as it is our own conclusions, and we bicker with the same ferver as we debate our religious standpoints. It's easy to deny it, but difficult to prove.

I'd consider a warning system to give people the opportunity to recognize when they're acting in an overtly hostile and potentially uncouth manner. Maybe demoting people's levels for aggressively trolling or insulting others and give them a chance to learn their lesson, and if not lvl 0 is banned.

It's difficult to gauge where someone's free speech is being attacked and when we need to silence people who have no desire to provide beneficial discourse. It's also difficult to gauge when enough is enough and people need to actually be silenced. People say hate speech is and should be protected speech, and I agree to an end. Consequences must be had for speech that causes egregious emotional harm or is meant to be offensive to an individual in retaliation for a differing opinion.

I've personally tried to moderate myself and on occasion we may all fail to police ourselves, once in a while. I wouldn't suggest a 3 strikes policy, unless it had a limited time duration, as it may inadvertently penalize longer term users. Maybe add emojis to point out logical phallacies and the ones most used (top 3 maybe) will be shown public facing. For example the "Liberals want to murder babbies" strawman used on this very strain of comments. The truth is some people have a definition of baby. Everyone agrees brain is necessary for something to not be a growth, but beyond that it's up for debate. I try to stay out of this debate because I will never be pregnant and forced to make that decision.

Sorry, I have a habit or writing dissertations, rather than comments.
For the general public, I'd just say read your writings and decide if you are the recipient of your own message, would it bother you?

It's about learning to argue, or debate, or disagree...

Fairly.

Both in a relationship (the link you posted) and here on our website.

When you've stooped to "name calling" or "insinuations"....you've just shown that
you either

1. Don't know how to debate fairly
2. Don't think it's worth it.

So you have 2 choices.

1. Improve the disagreement style; remove the sneers, the degrading remarks; focus on the issue...or
2. Find a lawyer and proceed to divorce/get blocked/stop using/leave the website.

I'll end this with a favorite guide that I check often and leave on my "desktop";

You're not going to be able to avoid jerks of any kind. I suggest stronger responses to bad behavior like removing them from the site. Blocking them just lets them harass someone else. Just my two cents. And, if you're just trying to make the world a better place, it's like solving the Middle East crisis, not going to happen.

I don't know. If it encourages people to be supportive, then I'm all for it. I've seen some of the nasty things that have gone here, and I know for myself I don't participate because it's a waste of my time and energy, and instead I focus on interactions that have been thoughtful or supportive -- that's been my favorite thing about being on this site, that even though there may be some confrontational threads, there's way more a feeling of belonging here than on any other social media... All this being said, I don't know how a status update would function. I'd suggest to try it and see. "Schrödinger's Cat," right? -- you won't know until you find out.

I do see an intolerance towards conservatives for sure. I think this ideal that we can get along and be civil with them though is misguided. I understand the desire to go back to time when people could be civil even if they disagreed politically. The problem is those times are long gone because that environment was made possible because we all lived in a shared reality. Now the right wing is so lied to they are living in a world that is almost as delusional as the society in North Korea. The Christian Coalition won the war on facts and knowledge in that community so they now believe anything they are told no matter how crazy it is. Flat earth, anti-vax, climate change deniers are all a symptom of this war. Since the people that lie to them get paid for lying and the biggest lie gets the most rewards, is it any surprise we have the environment we have now. So unless you can bring them back into a shared reality so we have a foundation that can be agreed upon I don't see any of that stuff helping at all. Teaching people to be able to defend their point of view better might help but the right wing does tend to be more aggressive so I can understand why many don't want to get into that confrontation. I'm just an aggressive asshole so I don't mind fighting with them. I just enjoy debating really. I enjoy humiliating them with the truth, it's pretty easy since the live in a fantasy world but I don't imagine that is seen as a positive thing by you either. Fighting this shit over the internet is much preferable to fighting it out in the streets so I don't see it as bad as most do. I can also understand why your goals of attracting more people are not the same as mine so you do whatever you feel is best as long as you are not censoring people I won't care.

Well . To anyone who got to know me on this site , u are aware that I am not the best educated one , or the best spoken , or the bright star on any category ( I ll take " who does not give a rat's behind for 1000 Alex ).
So don't jump on my English , u can do that any other day and I will be actually thankful for .
Contempt :
6 , maybe 8 yrs ago , I worked on a patient for several hrs in the ER setting . Chronic issues , non compliance , and there w sepsis onset . Fair enough and easy deal . She was chatty and in a preaching mood despite of a high fever and a half way dead bp .
I have heard that night several times of how her faith is keeping her alive and how the good lord provides . I can be funny and tell u who I think was keeping her alive and who the good lord was , but u already know what I stand for I hope , and does not matter . She went one to ask me if I have the lord in my life and if I am happy . She went on to tell me , that true happiness is when u forgive your enemies and u accept lord's plan for everything .
U know , I was dying to say " u have enemies ? How so ? A godly woman like u ? Who can possibly hate your guts ". But Bcz paying bills is more important than been smart ass , I ate it AND I smiled . Of course ! Just when I was about to be done w her and ready to put orders for her admission up stairs , I asked her One question : do u have any kids ? She said :" two growing up daughters and 7 grandkids ".
I asked , if any of your grandkids get raped and killed tonight , would u forgive the killer ?
She replied without any hesitation , " absolutely . This will had be my lords plan for my grandkid and the killer must had his own reasons and plan by the lord . My job is to not CONTEMPT but to forgive him ".
And that's where I thought , a) she is crazy . B) I must be an a?!$@ apparently . And u know , Bcz I can't know for sure if she was crazy , I decided I am an A,?$& . I must be . Evidently , I contempt murder , rape , lies , indoctrination of children , oppression of minorities , abuse of men , abuse of women , discrimination / gay rights , and anyone who makes education and health access / services not accessible for humans . I also contempt anyone who stops progress , anyone who cuts funds for vital organizations and social services and science research . Let me see , what I forgot . I am sure I contempt much more . Ah , here is one , religions ! If u are religious thou AND u have legit questions Bcz u do want to learn , ask me .

That patient taught me a lot about myself that night . And I am thankful . It also taught me , debating is Useful and possible when the basics are there on both sides . U can have all the good manners and fancy words u want and all that , point is , if u believe that abortions are murder , we need a wall, Brett kavanaugh was an honest victim , and the earth is flat , well , I will just smile and say u are crazy , and u can smile and say I am an a$&@".
We can sugar coat it all day long , provide each other with links , and ? At the end of the day u vote for what I contempt and I vote for what gives u hives . On a web site u have even more options : block , scroll and ignore , leave a site that the majority seems to not be " your people " ? I think everyone utilizes what fits him / her best .

Your idea on " how u feeling " tab / posts seems like a good option for many members . I think they will like it .

I think it could work...but it seems to me that the answer to ‘how are you feeling?’ needs more than a few words...unless people answer ‘just fine,’ which would end most conversations. I can’t see how people will open up and reveal their deeper nature, by asking them ‘how are you feeling?’

I think part of the problem is that many of us don't have a model for how communication of this sort should work. I think we need a code of conduct, or at least examples of good communication that we can encourage people to follow. If someone fails to follow the rules, and shows no interest in doing so, that's a good reason to boot them from a group, or from the site as a whole.

One example of "rules of thumb:"

-- No personal attacks. You can criticize an idea, or offer support/evidence for a different idea, but it is not appropriate to say "your group" or "you" do X, Y, or Z Stick to the key idea or topic.
-- No sarcasm or virtual eye-rolling. This means that your communication has to stay direct and to the point, and refrains from trying to make the other person seem or feel foolish.

I guess I don't have much hope of us finding common ground, so I at least want there to be ground rules that attempt to make communication civil.

can't seem to paste anymore. any others having the same problem? if this is the case then this site is pretty useless.

The answer, actually, is very very simple.

Ban completely the use of the terms "they" or "them".

Would absolutely work and is absolutely impossible to actually do.

But think about it.

Great and much-needed post!

Classic idea, give it a go and see how it works out, maybe giving the REAL trouble-makers a 3 warning minimum and then handing out a PERMANENT Expulsion could be useful also.

My view of the right wing is not congruent with me responding to them in a "kindly" manner. They are the enemy of the working class people, plain and simple, just as the Nazis were enemies of the Jews. I see them as an entity that wants to limit/lower the standard of living for me and mine by turning this country into a oligarchy of the rich while the rest of us are left to struggle in desperation to eke out a standard of living that has been falling behind that of the progressive northern European countries and moving towards a life more like those unfortunates in the third world. Therefore, it is not reasonable that I deal with them in a "kindly" manner. Your willingness to do so is evidence that you do not have a realistic view of what they represent and what their aims truly are.

I've been more active on twitter lately and had to make a DM group that I called "we can be adults" because the group I was part of had a split because some people decided just because people didn't do things the way they thought it should be done and disagreed with them on some topics. We ended up being rape apologists, white supremacist apologists and transphobes all for the crime of agreeing with someone they didn't like and choosing to continue supporting a certain youtube channel. Anyway we haven't figured it out yet. I've had to unfollow a bunch of the people involved because of the hate they have been spewing. It makes me so sad I had considered them good friends."Guilt by association" that was the crime I had committed. Like you said some people just live for the fight and there is nothing that can be done.