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I really can't justify my own overwhelming personal discomfort at watching my friends embrace ...
Benthoven comments on Feb 22, 2018:
It's all part of our fear of the unknown, I think. We want to know what lies ahead, and not knowing is pretty scary. That's what makes mediums, tarot, and astrology so popular. It's our way of trying too look into the future and see what might be... to prepare for it, or to give us peace in the midst of situations that are causing us stress now.
Benthoven comments on Feb 22, 2018:
It's all part of our fear of the unknown, I think. We want to know what lies ahead, and not knowing is pretty scary. That's what makes mediums, tarot, and astrology so popular. It's our way of trying too look into the future and see what might be... to prepare for it, or to give us peace in the midst of situations that are causing us stress now.
What were 1-3 of the most interesting part-time jobs you ever held in your life?
Benthoven comments on Feb 22, 2018:
I guess my most interesting part time job was working for Batesville Caskets. I worked in the warehouse, putting caskets on the truck to go out every day, and receiving caskets once a week. When they interviewed me, they were concerned that I might not be able to handle the job... you know, caskets... but after a while I started singing Monster Mash, pretending to be Dracula shopping for a new "bed," and making other weird jokes. Then they worried that maybe I was responding too well to the job.
Benthoven comments on Feb 22, 2018:
I guess my most interesting part time job was working for Batesville Caskets. I worked in the warehouse, putting caskets on the truck to go out every day, and receiving caskets once a week. When they interviewed me, they were concerned that I might not be able to handle the job... you know, caskets... but after a while I started singing Monster Mash, pretending to be Dracula shopping for a new "bed," and making other weird jokes. Then they worried that maybe I was responding too well to the job.
When someone says they'll pray for you what's your response? Doesn't matter the reasons.
Benthoven comments on Feb 22, 2018:
You pray for me, I'll think for you.
Benthoven comments on Feb 22, 2018:
You pray for me, I'll think for you.
Would you be a better god than the god of the bible? If so - how?
Benthoven comments on Feb 22, 2018:
I think I'd focus too much on getting laid... Then there would be all these demigods running around, and I'm not sure what kind of parenting skills I would be able to exhibit at that point.
Benthoven comments on Feb 22, 2018:
I think I'd focus too much on getting laid... Then there would be all these demigods running around, and I'm not sure what kind of parenting skills I would be able to exhibit at that point.
I'm an open book so ask me anything.
Benthoven comments on Feb 22, 2018:
Which is quicker, to Brooklyn or by bus?
Benthoven comments on Feb 22, 2018:
Which is quicker, to Brooklyn or by bus?
Who gave you the 'birds and bees' lecture
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
Believe it or not, I learned from magazines. I managed to get my hands on Playboy and Penthouse in Jr high and high school, and that taught me how men and women go at it. As a gay man, I had to guess about that stuff, but I was able to put a brief snapshot together.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
Believe it or not, I learned from magazines. I managed to get my hands on Playboy and Penthouse in Jr high and high school, and that taught me how men and women go at it. As a gay man, I had to guess about that stuff, but I was able to put a brief snapshot together.
Does anyone else struggle with feelings of despair?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I have pretty much struggled with depression most of my life, and without even trying tend to have a nihilist bent philosophically. Needless to say, there are days that almost break me. And sensing that there's nothing coming after this, I don't see the need to prolong it either. So it's quite a challenge.
As to the science deniers and conspiracy theorists, I find hope that they will some day be forced to acknowledge it... but I doubt that I'll be here when that happens.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I have pretty much struggled with depression most of my life, and without even trying tend to have a nihilist bent philosophically. Needless to say, there are days that almost break me. And sensing that there's nothing coming after this, I don't see the need to prolong it either. So it's quite a challenge.
As to the science deniers and conspiracy theorists, I find hope that they will some day be forced to acknowledge it... but I doubt that I'll be here when that happens.
Can a homosexual attraction occur in a person who defines themselves as heterosexual?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I think we're finally getting to the point where the ideas of sexuality are not so black and white. We're starting to see it all under the heading of "sexuality," then below that are the various forms it takes. For some, gay or homosexual fits perfectly. For others, hetero sexual fits. Others can comfortably call themselves bi-sexual.
But there's a growing number of people that really don't fit into any of those buckets and don't have a good tag to stick atop their sexuality. I think that's especially true of the younger generation where they are growing up without the negative connotations of being anything other than "straight."
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I think we're finally getting to the point where the ideas of sexuality are not so black and white. We're starting to see it all under the heading of "sexuality," then below that are the various forms it takes. For some, gay or homosexual fits perfectly. For others, hetero sexual fits. Others can comfortably call themselves bi-sexual.
But there's a growing number of people that really don't fit into any of those buckets and don't have a good tag to stick atop their sexuality. I think that's especially true of the younger generation where they are growing up without the negative connotations of being anything other than "straight."
Is there a reason we should speak respectfully of the dead?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I've never understood that thinking either. There are people who walked the earth and did so much damage that the earth is actually a better place now that they're gone.
There's also the idea of speaking honestly about someone as opposed to whitewashing their lives. Saying that Roger Ailes sold his soul for money and destroyed journalism, not to mention created a cadre of scared conspiracy theorists is not speaking ill of the dead. It's simply telling the truth. And as far as I'm concerned, there's nothing wrong with telling the truth.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I've never understood that thinking either. There are people who walked the earth and did so much damage that the earth is actually a better place now that they're gone.
There's also the idea of speaking honestly about someone as opposed to whitewashing their lives. Saying that Roger Ailes sold his soul for money and destroyed journalism, not to mention created a cadre of scared conspiracy theorists is not speaking ill of the dead. It's simply telling the truth. And as far as I'm concerned, there's nothing wrong with telling the truth.
I've noticed most on this site don't think Trump is a good president.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
No one has offered proof? Seriously? Do you READ? Or do you get your news from Fox "news."
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
No one has offered proof? Seriously? Do you READ? Or do you get your news from Fox "news."
Is it easy or hard for you to get to sleep?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
It's both. Some days I'll sleep for... well... days. Other days I can't sleep at all and struggle to keep my mind from running away with me. I'm to the point where I want to drink a gallon of NyQuil just so I can get some sleep.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
It's both. Some days I'll sleep for... well... days. Other days I can't sleep at all and struggle to keep my mind from running away with me. I'm to the point where I want to drink a gallon of NyQuil just so I can get some sleep.
How do you deal with a relationship where someone believes in conspiracy, gods, aliens, racism, etc?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
Put as much distance between me and them as possible. These are people who have abandoned rationality, and there's no way to communicate with them without at some point triggering them. It's safer to avoid it altogether.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
Put as much distance between me and them as possible. These are people who have abandoned rationality, and there's no way to communicate with them without at some point triggering them. It's safer to avoid it altogether.
Does anyone pay any attention to the match percentage?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
To be honest I haven't even noticed them. That or there simply aren't any matches for me... which makes sense, I'm one-of-akind!
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
To be honest I haven't even noticed them. That or there simply aren't any matches for me... which makes sense, I'm one-of-akind!
Would you deny someone a date if they were wearing something you didn't like?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
If they were wearing a clown outfit, I can pretty much guarantee that the date is over. But if it's jeans and a shirt... no biggie. If they stink... well, that's another problem.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
If they were wearing a clown outfit, I can pretty much guarantee that the date is over. But if it's jeans and a shirt... no biggie. If they stink... well, that's another problem.
If you had to get a song lyric tattooed on your body, what would you choose?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I see a little silhouetto of a man
Scaramouche, Scaramouche, will you do the Fandango?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I see a little silhouetto of a man
Scaramouche, Scaramouche, will you do the Fandango?
Can we have a scar thread?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
Most of my scars are on the inside, and only Vodka can hide them.
I don't have a belly button though... at least not much of one. I had to have part of it cut away when something underneath ruptured and they had to go in and clean it up. It's a little weird, but I never take my shirt off and don't touch my belly when I don't have to.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
Most of my scars are on the inside, and only Vodka can hide them.
I don't have a belly button though... at least not much of one. I had to have part of it cut away when something underneath ruptured and they had to go in and clean it up. It's a little weird, but I never take my shirt off and don't touch my belly when I don't have to.
Do you try to avoid chemicals in products you use?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I remember getting sick one day and one taking some sort of cold medicine. My coworker, annoyed at me, said, "You always go for the chemical option." I was a bit surprised by her response. "It's all chemicals. I'm just chemicals..." So it was the weirdest thing to be reprimanded fur using chemicals.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I remember getting sick one day and one taking some sort of cold medicine. My coworker, annoyed at me, said, "You always go for the chemical option." I was a bit surprised by her response. "It's all chemicals. I'm just chemicals..." So it was the weirdest thing to be reprimanded fur using chemicals.
What are some of your favorite films?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
Princess Bride; Life of Brian; Johnny Dangerously; Prince Caspian.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
Princess Bride; Life of Brian; Johnny Dangerously; Prince Caspian.
Why isn't it socially acceptable on the first date to just hand each other questionnaires you've ...
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I've always said that the first date is really just a job interview.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I've always said that the first date is really just a job interview.
Who else gets annoyed when someone like a cashier says have a blessed day?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
If it comes across as over "spiritual," I'll just smile and say, "Hail Satan."
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
If it comes across as over "spiritual," I'll just smile and say, "Hail Satan."
Easter is on April Fool's Day this year.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
OMG! How cool is that. I just found out that Friday the 13th was on April Fools this year too. ;)
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
OMG! How cool is that. I just found out that Friday the 13th was on April Fools this year too. ;)
Is it just me, or does it seem like the more religious someone is, the more they seem to fear death?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I think that's why they embrace religion in the first place... Religion offers an alternative to death. There's a heaven, a hell, or reincarnation. Which, believe it or not, is far less troubling to most people than to simply "stop existing." I think that frightens them over everything else.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I think that's why they embrace religion in the first place... Religion offers an alternative to death. There's a heaven, a hell, or reincarnation. Which, believe it or not, is far less troubling to most people than to simply "stop existing." I think that frightens them over everything else.
Single
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
About two decades.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
About two decades.
How do you feel about profanity in music?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I don't mind a little "Baby got back," or "Shake that ass for me..." One of my favorite songs is Bad Touch by the Bloodhound Gang, which is about as profane as it gets.But the rest of their songs seem to be profanity for profanity sake.
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I don't mind a little "Baby got back," or "Shake that ass for me..." One of my favorite songs is Bad Touch by the Bloodhound Gang, which is about as profane as it gets.But the rest of their songs seem to be profanity for profanity sake.
Just how precious is human life?
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I would argue that that religious don't believe in the sanctity of life. They're very protective of the fetus, but once that child is born, they're on their own. And if they're born poor, then they deserve every horrible thing that happens to them. As to who gets to decide when life ends, that again they don't care about so long as it's not you making a decision to end your own life. Get killed by guns? That's the price of freedom. Die from starvation or disease, that's what you get for being poor. Get sick, don't see a doctor, and die? That's your lack of faith.
As to the actual question, I think this is a difficult question to answer. We see in nature that it's willing to sacrifice the week to protect the herd, but humans now have a conscious. That means life takes on a more complicated aspect to it. Then there's the added aspect that we cannot ask the actual person which they prefer. They are given no voice in their future.
We've seen babies born that weren't expected to live and end up being great additions to their families. Others suffer horribly. In my mind, this isn't a subject I can answer. It is one I have to leave to the parents and their medical team. I also think it's dependent upon what the medical team thinks is possible. These people have a lot of education on the subject, and they don't take decisions lightly (most of the time).
Benthoven comments on Feb 19, 2018:
I would argue that that religious don't believe in the sanctity of life. They're very protective of the fetus, but once that child is born, they're on their own. And if they're born poor, then they deserve every horrible thing that happens to them. As to who gets to decide when life ends, that again they don't care about so long as it's not you making a decision to end your own life. Get killed by guns? That's the price of freedom. Die from starvation or disease, that's what you get for being poor. Get sick, don't see a doctor, and die? That's your lack of faith.
As to the actual question, I think this is a difficult question to answer. We see in nature that it's willing to sacrifice the week to protect the herd, but humans now have a conscious. That means life takes on a more complicated aspect to it. Then there's the added aspect that we cannot ask the actual person which they prefer. They are given no voice in their future.
We've seen babies born that weren't expected to live and end up being great additions to their families. Others suffer horribly. In my mind, this isn't a subject I can answer. It is one I have to leave to the parents and their medical team. I also think it's dependent upon what the medical team thinks is possible. These people have a lot of education on the subject, and they don't take decisions lightly (most of the time).
I think this is a pretty decent list of things we should consider giving up.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
The problem with procrastination is right there in the word. PROcrastinator. I'm a PRO... It's the one thing in life I do well.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
The problem with procrastination is right there in the word. PROcrastinator. I'm a PRO... It's the one thing in life I do well.
Whats The most frightening thing anyone’s ever said to you?
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
Let's make America Great Again!
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
Let's make America Great Again!
Can you give a brief review of a favorite, but perhaps little known, book you frequently reread?
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
One of my favorite books is from C.S. Lewis' Chronicles of Narnia: The Horse and His Boy.
First of all, it played with my boyhood dreams. Shasta, the main character has a horrible father, runs away, discovers that he was adopted, and his real father was a king. In the process, he meets Aslan, one of the most interesting characters I've ever read.
To this day there are parts of that book that stick out to me. For example, Shasta asks Aslan why something happened to a friend of his but not to him. Aslan informs Shasta that what happened is her story, not his. That has stuck with me to this day.
It's one of those stories that I used to escape my reality, and now that I'm an adult, it takes me back to the place I used to run to.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
One of my favorite books is from C.S. Lewis' Chronicles of Narnia: The Horse and His Boy.
First of all, it played with my boyhood dreams. Shasta, the main character has a horrible father, runs away, discovers that he was adopted, and his real father was a king. In the process, he meets Aslan, one of the most interesting characters I've ever read.
To this day there are parts of that book that stick out to me. For example, Shasta asks Aslan why something happened to a friend of his but not to him. Aslan informs Shasta that what happened is her story, not his. That has stuck with me to this day.
It's one of those stories that I used to escape my reality, and now that I'm an adult, it takes me back to the place I used to run to.
Hello potential friends.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
I wanted to be a pastor at one time. I started the classes, studying the bible, and before I knew it, I was out of the church and trying to find a new imaginary best friend. I imagine it sucks being in AZ. I grew up in Riverton, Wyoming, and it was a scary place to grow up. I'm grateful that I've never had to go back. New York is much easier.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
I wanted to be a pastor at one time. I started the classes, studying the bible, and before I knew it, I was out of the church and trying to find a new imaginary best friend. I imagine it sucks being in AZ. I grew up in Riverton, Wyoming, and it was a scary place to grow up. I'm grateful that I've never had to go back. New York is much easier.
At what point will the mass shooting become, too horrific?
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
I thought Sandy Hook would be that point... but we barely even blinked. So I don't think there is a point. I think that this is something most Americans have decided to be okay with and to accept in the name of an inanimate object that has been turned into a deity.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
I thought Sandy Hook would be that point... but we barely even blinked. So I don't think there is a point. I think that this is something most Americans have decided to be okay with and to accept in the name of an inanimate object that has been turned into a deity.
I'll probably post a lot in this category because I'm silly, random and fun.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-ORHKxaXmA
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-ORHKxaXmA
Did you arrive at your decision of belief by means of research and critical thinking or merely ...
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
Both. When I was into studying the Bible, the more I learned, the more challenging things became. A god of love who was also a genocidal maniac. In my own life it seemed that there were areas that God simply wouldn't touch (or couldn't touch). when my life fell around me, there wasn't any help coming from above. So eventually I came to the conclusion that I probably wasn't dealing with a real entity.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
Both. When I was into studying the Bible, the more I learned, the more challenging things became. A god of love who was also a genocidal maniac. In my own life it seemed that there were areas that God simply wouldn't touch (or couldn't touch). when my life fell around me, there wasn't any help coming from above. So eventually I came to the conclusion that I probably wasn't dealing with a real entity.
What's your favorite book? I loved Atlas Shrugged, Anna Karinena, and Guns, Germs, and Steel.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
Dracula. I read the book in high school and was so fascinated by the psychological game that Dracula played with his victims. It wasn't just a monster, it was a game... and the way he told it, through the journals of those being stalked, that made it all the more interesting and intense.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
Dracula. I read the book in high school and was so fascinated by the psychological game that Dracula played with his victims. It wasn't just a monster, it was a game... and the way he told it, through the journals of those being stalked, that made it all the more interesting and intense.
Who's your favorite superhero of all time, and why?
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
Does Samantha Stevens count as a superhero? When I was very young, I used to fantasize that I was really her son, and that I was kidnapped by my current parents, but that some day I would find my way back home... to the REAL Darrin.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
Does Samantha Stevens count as a superhero? When I was very young, I used to fantasize that I was really her son, and that I was kidnapped by my current parents, but that some day I would find my way back home... to the REAL Darrin.
How many republican atheists/agnostics are members of this website?
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
While it seems to be a stereotype, or a bias, it does appear that Conservatives and Republicans are pushing themselves further and further away from reality and branding everything they disagree with as "fake news."
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
While it seems to be a stereotype, or a bias, it does appear that Conservatives and Republicans are pushing themselves further and further away from reality and branding everything they disagree with as "fake news."
A man cooking. Is it a turn off or turn on?
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
Depends on what he's cooking.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
Depends on what he's cooking.
Do you have a family member (or person in your life) that you just don't want to deal with?
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
That pretty much defines most of my family. We are "friendly" per se, but I don't talk to them much or hang out.
With your grandfather though, are you sure it's not dementia? I know you said he's a difficult person, but some form dementia may also play a role. Who knows, he may have been dealing with something like this for a while.
One thing I've noticed as I watch seemingly nice people suddenly go crazy when they get old is that they seem to be holding a lot of their "true" feelings in to fit into a "polite" society, but as we age, our feelings just come eeking out. And it seems that those were already obnoxious to begin with simply get worse as their self-control mechanism starts to fail.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
That pretty much defines most of my family. We are "friendly" per se, but I don't talk to them much or hang out.
With your grandfather though, are you sure it's not dementia? I know you said he's a difficult person, but some form dementia may also play a role. Who knows, he may have been dealing with something like this for a while.
One thing I've noticed as I watch seemingly nice people suddenly go crazy when they get old is that they seem to be holding a lot of their "true" feelings in to fit into a "polite" society, but as we age, our feelings just come eeking out. And it seems that those were already obnoxious to begin with simply get worse as their self-control mechanism starts to fail.
I still see more liberal gun grabbers making poor arguments for gun control.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the People to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.
That's it... that's the entire text of the Second Amendment. Nowhere do I see any notion that gun control is an abridgment or alienation.
As to the "don't like it, move," comment, that's just ridiculous. If you love something... say democracy... school children... human life... you don't bail because there are things happening that you don't like. You stay and make it better. You find a way to make it better. If you cannot tolerate a variance of opinion... especially on this subject, perhaps you shouldn't be discussing this issue at this point.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the People to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.
That's it... that's the entire text of the Second Amendment. Nowhere do I see any notion that gun control is an abridgment or alienation.
As to the "don't like it, move," comment, that's just ridiculous. If you love something... say democracy... school children... human life... you don't bail because there are things happening that you don't like. You stay and make it better. You find a way to make it better. If you cannot tolerate a variance of opinion... especially on this subject, perhaps you shouldn't be discussing this issue at this point.
How do you feel about supplements?
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
I take some of them. Nature Made is supposed to be a legitimate brand, and so I take their supplements. I am never going to get the nutrients I need from food, and so I feel I need to add supplements, but I'm pretty careful with them. I don't take the fad drugs, just the ones that I know I can't get enough of. Vitamin D is especially hard for me. I seem to always find myself lacking that.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
I take some of them. Nature Made is supposed to be a legitimate brand, and so I take their supplements. I am never going to get the nutrients I need from food, and so I feel I need to add supplements, but I'm pretty careful with them. I don't take the fad drugs, just the ones that I know I can't get enough of. Vitamin D is especially hard for me. I seem to always find myself lacking that.
Arranged marriage is still a thing in some places.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
To be honest, I think it may be just as viable. Here in the US people marry for "love," and most of those marriages end in divorce, sometimes disaster. The biggest worry I have is that both parties in the marriage have equal power, and that one isn't forced to do the bidding of the other. Aside from that, I may be more practical that what we're doing over here.
Benthoven comments on Feb 17, 2018:
To be honest, I think it may be just as viable. Here in the US people marry for "love," and most of those marriages end in divorce, sometimes disaster. The biggest worry I have is that both parties in the marriage have equal power, and that one isn't forced to do the bidding of the other. Aside from that, I may be more practical that what we're doing over here.
Share one song that you cannot help but sing along with when it comes on the radio.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
This song right here: Every time I hear it, I have to sing, dance, and shake a tail feather.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdbrIrFxas0
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
This song right here: Every time I hear it, I have to sing, dance, and shake a tail feather.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdbrIrFxas0
God must be very busy with 2 trillion known galaxies in the universe with billions of planets in ...
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
That's only if he's a micro-manager. He'd be better off to outsource a lot of it. Maybe earth just got stuck with a newbie, or just a really bad manager, and we need to find a way to get this guy fired and bring on a new guy... somebody more qualified.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
That's only if he's a micro-manager. He'd be better off to outsource a lot of it. Maybe earth just got stuck with a newbie, or just a really bad manager, and we need to find a way to get this guy fired and bring on a new guy... somebody more qualified.
Which Holidays if any have meaning to you and why, Which have no significance to you whatsoever.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I love Christmas: Partly because of the lights. I gets dark at 0-stupid-thirty, and that can be so depressing. But during that time of the year people everywhere put up beautiful and colorful lights, which adds a sense of serenity to the mayhem of darkness. That, and also because it's the one time we actually entertain the stories of hope and human kindness and... dare-I-say... miracles. Our myths fly free, and our minds entertain higher ideals that we don't tend to entertain during the rest of the year.
And in 2017, Memorial Day became a big thing to me. As I've said before, I lost my brother-in-law (Marine) in July, and that is going to be a hard day for quite some time. He's buried at Arlington National Cemetery, so it will probably be a pilgrimage for me every year. He'd been with my sister for twenty years, and that's a lot of time to get to know and love someone.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I love Christmas: Partly because of the lights. I gets dark at 0-stupid-thirty, and that can be so depressing. But during that time of the year people everywhere put up beautiful and colorful lights, which adds a sense of serenity to the mayhem of darkness. That, and also because it's the one time we actually entertain the stories of hope and human kindness and... dare-I-say... miracles. Our myths fly free, and our minds entertain higher ideals that we don't tend to entertain during the rest of the year.
And in 2017, Memorial Day became a big thing to me. As I've said before, I lost my brother-in-law (Marine) in July, and that is going to be a hard day for quite some time. He's buried at Arlington National Cemetery, so it will probably be a pilgrimage for me every year. He'd been with my sister for twenty years, and that's a lot of time to get to know and love someone.
Best thing about sex besides an orgasm ?
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
It's a great way to kill a couple of hours.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
It's a great way to kill a couple of hours.
The Roman's were jealous of Jesus and his popularity because they did not have it over the people, ...
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
Actually, the Romans had no idea who Jesus was. They nothinged him. It wasn't until his raid in the Temple that he even came to the attention of the Romans. It was at that point that Pilot decided to kill him. There's a good chance that the Sanhedrin and the Priestly class had heard of him... we know that the Pharisees had, but he was pretty much just a shaman until that event.
It was Paul, who turned Jesus into a Greek God that ended up having the last word. Jesus brother James, and Peter the disciple dogged Paul everywhere he went, telling Paul's followers that Paul was lying. However, when the Jewish wars began in 66, and Rome finally destroyed Jerusalem in 70, Jesus' disciples were wiped out. Paul was in Rome, along with Peter, but it was Paul's story that won the day.
Paul created the church in Rome which would eventually come to prominence in the late 200s, and finally be codified in the middle 300s. And as to Roman persecution of Christians, Romans didn't really care about Christians all that much. When it came to gods and other mythologies, they were quick to adopt the gods of the countries they conquered. It was an insurance policy for them. Take on all the gods so as not to piss any of them off. But Christians, very much like their counterparts the Jews, insisted on making a huge deal out of their sect. They invaded Roman festivals, threw over altars, and vandalized Roman statues, thus giving Rome a good reason to persecute them.
Religion is just a form of relating to our mythology, and the human species has been doing it since it became conscious. To call that a disease is the same as Christians calling homosexuality sin... these things are part of our evolution, and they're here for a reason. Religion is a blunt tool, and it has definitely brought much suffering upon the earth, but that's because religion incorporates not only our mythologies, but also our bigotries, our biases, and our tribalism... and then makes them "sacred."
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
Actually, the Romans had no idea who Jesus was. They nothinged him. It wasn't until his raid in the Temple that he even came to the attention of the Romans. It was at that point that Pilot decided to kill him. There's a good chance that the Sanhedrin and the Priestly class had heard of him... we know that the Pharisees had, but he was pretty much just a shaman until that event.
It was Paul, who turned Jesus into a Greek God that ended up having the last word. Jesus brother James, and Peter the disciple dogged Paul everywhere he went, telling Paul's followers that Paul was lying. However, when the Jewish wars began in 66, and Rome finally destroyed Jerusalem in 70, Jesus' disciples were wiped out. Paul was in Rome, along with Peter, but it was Paul's story that won the day.
Paul created the church in Rome which would eventually come to prominence in the late 200s, and finally be codified in the middle 300s. And as to Roman persecution of Christians, Romans didn't really care about Christians all that much. When it came to gods and other mythologies, they were quick to adopt the gods of the countries they conquered. It was an insurance policy for them. Take on all the gods so as not to piss any of them off. But Christians, very much like their counterparts the Jews, insisted on making a huge deal out of their sect. They invaded Roman festivals, threw over altars, and vandalized Roman statues, thus giving Rome a good reason to persecute them.
Religion is just a form of relating to our mythology, and the human species has been doing it since it became conscious. To call that a disease is the same as Christians calling homosexuality sin... these things are part of our evolution, and they're here for a reason. Religion is a blunt tool, and it has definitely brought much suffering upon the earth, but that's because religion incorporates not only our mythologies, but also our bigotries, our biases, and our tribalism... and then makes them "sacred."
Does anyone here believe in post death existence OTHER than religious afterlife?
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I think its fun to entertain those things. As a writer, and since I write ghost stories, I think about that a lot. Of course I don't "believe" that there's anything beyond this, and I assume that once I'm gone, it's over. BUT... it's still fun to play around with all the various myths and stories that have been told over our lifetime as a species.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I think its fun to entertain those things. As a writer, and since I write ghost stories, I think about that a lot. Of course I don't "believe" that there's anything beyond this, and I assume that once I'm gone, it's over. BUT... it's still fun to play around with all the various myths and stories that have been told over our lifetime as a species.
In the past I have tried to have debates/discussions with individuals who were against any gun ...
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
Yah, I've kind of headed that direction myself. I get sick every time I see another shooting, but when I watched Sandy Hook, and how our leaders chose to handle what was, for me, one of the most tragic episodes in recent memory, I realized that this is an issue we're just not going to tackle. As long as there's an NRA, pretty much nothing is going to be done. So I don't debate ammosexuals anymore.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
Yah, I've kind of headed that direction myself. I get sick every time I see another shooting, but when I watched Sandy Hook, and how our leaders chose to handle what was, for me, one of the most tragic episodes in recent memory, I realized that this is an issue we're just not going to tackle. As long as there's an NRA, pretty much nothing is going to be done. So I don't debate ammosexuals anymore.
Well let me ask, does anyone here believe in the theory of evolution?
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I don't "believe" in evolution anymore than I believe that the earth is round(ish), or that the sun is our major source of light, or that the Kardashians are a secret plot to destroy the youth of America. Beliefs are created in the absence of data, but once we have the data, beliefs are no long necessary.
As to "theory," it does not mean in science what it means for the rest of us. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scientific_theory
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I don't "believe" in evolution anymore than I believe that the earth is round(ish), or that the sun is our major source of light, or that the Kardashians are a secret plot to destroy the youth of America. Beliefs are created in the absence of data, but once we have the data, beliefs are no long necessary.
As to "theory," it does not mean in science what it means for the rest of us. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scientific_theory
Do people of above average intelligence have a harder time finding a partner?
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I think people who "THINK" they're above average tend to have a had time. Pretension can be very off-putting.
Please don't take this to mean I'm speaking about anybody on this site, please don't take it that way. I meet a lot of smart people, and they can be weird, but it's the pretentious ones that are difficult to handle. I know a lot of nerds who find dates, a lot of geeks who find dates, but those who think they're so much smarter than everybody... they don't last long in a relationship.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I think people who "THINK" they're above average tend to have a had time. Pretension can be very off-putting.
Please don't take this to mean I'm speaking about anybody on this site, please don't take it that way. I meet a lot of smart people, and they can be weird, but it's the pretentious ones that are difficult to handle. I know a lot of nerds who find dates, a lot of geeks who find dates, but those who think they're so much smarter than everybody... they don't last long in a relationship.
What type of god is more likely?
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I would assume, if this "god" was a creator, it would be interested in all of its creation.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I would assume, if this "god" was a creator, it would be interested in all of its creation.
Is it just me or does others find it undignified for our VP Mike Pence, who said that he 'ignored ...
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I think for the first time in American history we've elected children to office. And not just children, but brats, urchins, imps, devil's seed, children of the corn... and they are behaving as those types of children would. There have to be some amazing parents out there who have dealt with these types of kids who can tell us how we can quell some of the craziness.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I think for the first time in American history we've elected children to office. And not just children, but brats, urchins, imps, devil's seed, children of the corn... and they are behaving as those types of children would. There have to be some amazing parents out there who have dealt with these types of kids who can tell us how we can quell some of the craziness.
People that don't believe in God... why do some of them believe in ghosts or supernatural?
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
People believe in all kinds of crazy things. Why do supposedly scientific people fall for pseudo science? Why do well read people fall for conspiracy theories? It's biological... our minds want to believe. They were designed to believe. We've only barely entered that part of our history where we can even understand the difference between reality and make believe. Our minds must make a fairly significant shift in the coming years to move beyond what they've been doing since we stood upright.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
People believe in all kinds of crazy things. Why do supposedly scientific people fall for pseudo science? Why do well read people fall for conspiracy theories? It's biological... our minds want to believe. They were designed to believe. We've only barely entered that part of our history where we can even understand the difference between reality and make believe. Our minds must make a fairly significant shift in the coming years to move beyond what they've been doing since we stood upright.
I've never been into prostilatizing my lack of religion, but I do try to stand up for what I believe...
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I don't often tell people that I'm "non-religious", but I've started to feel stronger that it is important to deal with lies. Lately, the God-pushers have gone into some terrifying territory, by turning so many things into lies. I know that by recognizing the lies they aren't going to change, but they'll at least know that lies wont work with me. That and it will make their "space" smaller, and that's necessary. We need to give their lies less space and once we do that, we can somewhat quarantine this problem.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I don't often tell people that I'm "non-religious", but I've started to feel stronger that it is important to deal with lies. Lately, the God-pushers have gone into some terrifying territory, by turning so many things into lies. I know that by recognizing the lies they aren't going to change, but they'll at least know that lies wont work with me. That and it will make their "space" smaller, and that's necessary. We need to give their lies less space and once we do that, we can somewhat quarantine this problem.
Besides a partner or desire to find one, what helps bring meaning and purpose to your lives?
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
Writing. Creating characters and stories has a very rewarding aspect to it. I also think watching stories, listening to stories, telling stories... they add so much to life.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
Writing. Creating characters and stories has a very rewarding aspect to it. I also think watching stories, listening to stories, telling stories... they add so much to life.
Can an atheist be happy for the future
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I think atheists tend to be more depressed. Reality doesn't offer the same happy endings that fairy tales do, and that can sometimes be a real challenge to get hold of.
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/atheism-has-a-suicide-problem_us_5a2a902ee4b022ec613b812b
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I think atheists tend to be more depressed. Reality doesn't offer the same happy endings that fairy tales do, and that can sometimes be a real challenge to get hold of.
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/atheism-has-a-suicide-problem_us_5a2a902ee4b022ec613b812b
Is blocking someone on Facebook because of too many religious "shares" intolerant?
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I'm very glad for the "Unfollow" feature on Facebook. I can stop seeing people's posts, but we're still friends. There are a lot of reasons I choose this option, but too much pseudo science from my new age friends, too much religion from my Christian friends, and too many food pictures from my friends who place way too much value on food. And ANYBODY who posts a Nickleback video.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I'm very glad for the "Unfollow" feature on Facebook. I can stop seeing people's posts, but we're still friends. There are a lot of reasons I choose this option, but too much pseudo science from my new age friends, too much religion from my Christian friends, and too many food pictures from my friends who place way too much value on food. And ANYBODY who posts a Nickleback video.
Cremation or burial for your funeral?
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I'm pretty sure I'm going to go with cremation. But the idea of being buried under a tree to provide nutrients is a really cool idea too.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
I'm pretty sure I'm going to go with cremation. But the idea of being buried under a tree to provide nutrients is a really cool idea too.
How do ya’ll cope with an office job?
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
That helps. It's too bad the company doesn't bother to try and make the room more 'human friendly.'
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
That helps. It's too bad the company doesn't bother to try and make the room more 'human friendly.'
How did you spend Valentine's Day?
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
Binge watching Supernatural.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
Binge watching Supernatural.
I just found out that the guy I contract to in the morning doesn't know what evolution is.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
Damn... I'd be that dumb if it would make me a millionaire. well... maybe not.
Benthoven comments on Feb 15, 2018:
Damn... I'd be that dumb if it would make me a millionaire. well... maybe not.
Do you have a favorite outspoken atheist?
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
No atheists come to mind, but I live Neil deGrasse Tyson.
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
No atheists come to mind, but I live Neil deGrasse Tyson.
Does the idea of God work as a placebo drug?
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
Not as a drug, but as a placebo.
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
Not as a drug, but as a placebo.
Favorite Anything?
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
I love music, especially music with a really strong back-beat.
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
I love music, especially music with a really strong back-beat.
Who is your favorite intellectual?
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
Homer Simpson.
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
Homer Simpson.
What fiction made a big impact on you?
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
Dracula. The book, not the movies. It was the first time I saw "evil" in a psychological drama, and not just some mindless killing demon.
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
Dracula. The book, not the movies. It was the first time I saw "evil" in a psychological drama, and not just some mindless killing demon.
How to respond to the "God is energy" belief/claim.
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
What type of energy? Magnetic, Kinetic, Thermal, Light, Nuclear, Red Bull?
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
What type of energy? Magnetic, Kinetic, Thermal, Light, Nuclear, Red Bull?
Emotional Armor
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
That love is not the be-all end-all that everybody says it is, and that it doesn't always win in the end.
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
That love is not the be-all end-all that everybody says it is, and that it doesn't always win in the end.
What made you wake up?
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
Today it was my alarm clock.
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
Today it was my alarm clock.
How important is it to the average athiest or agnostic to debunk religious beliefs?
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
It doesn't really matter. If reason worked with these people, then we wouldn't be having this debate in the first place.
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
It doesn't really matter. If reason worked with these people, then we wouldn't be having this debate in the first place.
How important is it to the average athiest or agnostic to debunk religious beliefs?
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
Because they're beliefs, people are going to hang on to them regardless of the facts. That's just the way beliefs work. However, I think that it's imperative that begin to point out every lie "as a lie." It probably won't do much good to get into a reasoned debate since they're not interested in facts, but it is important to simply call it a lie... We're at a point where lies need to be called out immediately and quickly. If nothing else, we can at least narrow the places where they and their lies can hang out.
Benthoven comments on Feb 14, 2018:
Because they're beliefs, people are going to hang on to them regardless of the facts. That's just the way beliefs work. However, I think that it's imperative that begin to point out every lie "as a lie." It probably won't do much good to get into a reasoned debate since they're not interested in facts, but it is important to simply call it a lie... We're at a point where lies need to be called out immediately and quickly. If nothing else, we can at least narrow the places where they and their lies can hang out.
What movie fucked with your head the most?
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
Brazil. Certain aspects of that movie still haunt me to this day.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
Brazil. Certain aspects of that movie still haunt me to this day.
What is the purpose of life?
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
Maybe the idea of life having a purpose is a byproduct of having evolved advanced consciousness and the prefrontal cortex. Animals don't seem to worry about such things. For them it's pretty much survival. Pets are a little different since their survival is taken care of, so they can live without worrying about those things.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
Maybe the idea of life having a purpose is a byproduct of having evolved advanced consciousness and the prefrontal cortex. Animals don't seem to worry about such things. For them it's pretty much survival. Pets are a little different since their survival is taken care of, so they can live without worrying about those things.
Excellent point
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I tell my evangelical friends who threaten me with hell, "Hell, for me, would be spending eternity with you. You have no idea how awful you are to be around and I can't wait until you're all stuck with each other forever, and ever, and ever, and ever."
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I tell my evangelical friends who threaten me with hell, "Hell, for me, would be spending eternity with you. You have no idea how awful you are to be around and I can't wait until you're all stuck with each other forever, and ever, and ever, and ever."
Masturbation might not be sex but it damn sure is good enough in the meantime.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
It's not sex? Damn! And here I thought I was dating my hands.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
It's not sex? Damn! And here I thought I was dating my hands.
Do you have any beliefs that aren't supported by evidence?
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I tend to ask for evidence when people say things to me that sound "untrue," but I have a ton of beliefs that I'm not even aware of, so it's possible that they're back there. Unfortunately, I don't find out about them until someone says something that's opposite that belief, then I get my hackles up, and that's how I know I have a belief... because it's just been challenged.
But I've said often that "beliefs only happen in the absence of data," and therefore any belief would, by definition, be unsupported by evidence. Once evidence is present, there's no need to believe anymore.
Still, I have lots of beliefs that I allow to hang out because they're useful. For instance: I "know" that ghosts and demons and other mythical creatures don't exist, but as a writer, and one who writes about ghosts and vampires and demons, I allow myself to think about them 'logically' as if I did believe in them. I know magic isn't real, but I'll watch Harry Potter over and over and over again. I understand mythology is simply a series of stories we tell ourselves about the world around us, but I still love the Lord of the Rings trilogy. So much that I've read the book a hundred times, and spent the extra pennies on the special version of the movies that added in all the extra scenes.
I'm pretty sure that nothing happens after we die, but I still play with what it would be like to come back as a ghost, or to have to find my way to the gods the way the Egyptians did, or what Heaven might look like if it were real.
For me, it's about the story. While these things can't happen in real life, they can in our minds, and that fascinates me. In my mind I can come back from the dead, levitate the TV remote to me when I forget to bring it with me, or point my finger and make something appear from thin air. These things happen in my head while I read or tell the story. So I play with them.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I tend to ask for evidence when people say things to me that sound "untrue," but I have a ton of beliefs that I'm not even aware of, so it's possible that they're back there. Unfortunately, I don't find out about them until someone says something that's opposite that belief, then I get my hackles up, and that's how I know I have a belief... because it's just been challenged.
But I've said often that "beliefs only happen in the absence of data," and therefore any belief would, by definition, be unsupported by evidence. Once evidence is present, there's no need to believe anymore.
Still, I have lots of beliefs that I allow to hang out because they're useful. For instance: I "know" that ghosts and demons and other mythical creatures don't exist, but as a writer, and one who writes about ghosts and vampires and demons, I allow myself to think about them 'logically' as if I did believe in them. I know magic isn't real, but I'll watch Harry Potter over and over and over again. I understand mythology is simply a series of stories we tell ourselves about the world around us, but I still love the Lord of the Rings trilogy. So much that I've read the book a hundred times, and spent the extra pennies on the special version of the movies that added in all the extra scenes.
I'm pretty sure that nothing happens after we die, but I still play with what it would be like to come back as a ghost, or to have to find my way to the gods the way the Egyptians did, or what Heaven might look like if it were real.
For me, it's about the story. While these things can't happen in real life, they can in our minds, and that fascinates me. In my mind I can come back from the dead, levitate the TV remote to me when I forget to bring it with me, or point my finger and make something appear from thin air. These things happen in my head while I read or tell the story. So I play with them.
What is your response when people threaten you with religious punishments? (i.e. Hell/Jahannam)
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
You show me ONE person... Any person, who has suffered in Hell, and I'll buy your premise.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
You show me ONE person... Any person, who has suffered in Hell, and I'll buy your premise.
Night owl, or early bird?
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I can never decide. Sometimes I'm super creative at night, but other times I'm super creative in the morning. I think a lot of it has to do with my work schedule. When I'm working, I like to go in super early. But when my schedule is open, then I prefer late at night. But I have never liked staying up all night, because then I feel as if I'm sleeping the whole day away, and I don't like that either.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I can never decide. Sometimes I'm super creative at night, but other times I'm super creative in the morning. I think a lot of it has to do with my work schedule. When I'm working, I like to go in super early. But when my schedule is open, then I prefer late at night. But I have never liked staying up all night, because then I feel as if I'm sleeping the whole day away, and I don't like that either.
I just love absolutely cheesy jokes.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
A man went to visit a friend and was amazed to find him playing chess with his dog. He watched in astonishment while they played. "I can hardly believe my eyes!" he exclaimed. "That's the smartest dog I've ever seen." "Nah," his friend replied, "he's not so smart. I've beaten him three games out of five."
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
A man went to visit a friend and was amazed to find him playing chess with his dog. He watched in astonishment while they played. "I can hardly believe my eyes!" he exclaimed. "That's the smartest dog I've ever seen." "Nah," his friend replied, "he's not so smart. I've beaten him three games out of five."
If you were given the chance, would you like to stay a certain age forever?
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I think I'd like to keep the body of my middle-thirties. I was in great shape, I was kind of cute, I still thought life could work out, I could climb a flight of stairs without passing out, I could eat a doughnut without suddenly shredding my pants, and I didn't need farm implements just to get me out of the tub after a bath.
But I'd like to keep the learning stuff. The things I've picked up in the years since have been pretty valuable. I feel like if I had all that when I was in my thirties, my life would be so different than it is now.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I think I'd like to keep the body of my middle-thirties. I was in great shape, I was kind of cute, I still thought life could work out, I could climb a flight of stairs without passing out, I could eat a doughnut without suddenly shredding my pants, and I didn't need farm implements just to get me out of the tub after a bath.
But I'd like to keep the learning stuff. The things I've picked up in the years since have been pretty valuable. I feel like if I had all that when I was in my thirties, my life would be so different than it is now.
Believer Bashing?
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I think it depends on who we're "talking to." When we're dealing with a demonstrated homophobe who wants to make it impossible for a gay person to make a living or who wants to enact laws that will subjugate them to second-class citizens, then we must absolutely condemn them. When they attack women and go after women's health, we must condemn them. To be open and accepting of others means that we must also deal with those who would harm others. We cannot stand on the sidelines.
Even at a personal level, if someone wants to tell me they don't "believe" in evolution, I'm not going to necessarily engage. But if they decide that they have to tell me WHY, then I'm going to engage. And I'm at the point where I no longer feel the need to be "gentle." There's no excuse for them not to know this. The evidence has been there for decades now.
If someone close to me wants to believe in God, and even wants to pray for me, but they pray for me that God will make my life 'better,' I have no problem with that. If their god is about love and compassion, then I have no problem with that. But if their god is a homophobic, child-molesting, women-abusing, warmongering genocidal asshole, then I'm not going to pretend that it's okay for them to believe that.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I think it depends on who we're "talking to." When we're dealing with a demonstrated homophobe who wants to make it impossible for a gay person to make a living or who wants to enact laws that will subjugate them to second-class citizens, then we must absolutely condemn them. When they attack women and go after women's health, we must condemn them. To be open and accepting of others means that we must also deal with those who would harm others. We cannot stand on the sidelines.
Even at a personal level, if someone wants to tell me they don't "believe" in evolution, I'm not going to necessarily engage. But if they decide that they have to tell me WHY, then I'm going to engage. And I'm at the point where I no longer feel the need to be "gentle." There's no excuse for them not to know this. The evidence has been there for decades now.
If someone close to me wants to believe in God, and even wants to pray for me, but they pray for me that God will make my life 'better,' I have no problem with that. If their god is about love and compassion, then I have no problem with that. But if their god is a homophobic, child-molesting, women-abusing, warmongering genocidal asshole, then I'm not going to pretend that it's okay for them to believe that.
Are religious people really less smart, on average, than atheists? – Research Digest
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I worry about this "smart/intelligent" conversation we're having at the moment. It is true that non-believers and "liberals" are better read, and it can be said that they're more open to education, but are they "smarter"? And when I say that I'm not just talking about IQ. Are they balanced, open, compassionate... in other words, what's their "emotion IQ."
There's a movement afoot among non-theists to disavow all emotion and focus only on reason. The problem is, emotions are built into us, and they are what motivates us. To try and subdue them, even in the name of reason only makes us more unreasonable. We have emotions for a reason. They tell us what's going on. Fear tells us that our lives may be in peril. Anger tells us that our values or boundaries have been violated. Guilt tells us that we have violated our own values. Hate tells us that someone or something seeks to do harm and we must forever put space between that.
These are generalities, I know, but it's a place to start. The ability to see from another's point of view, to recognize why they might be reacting as they do... all those things make us gentler, kinder people, and that also makes our actual knowledge even more needed. It was Jonas Salk's compassion that drove him to find a cure for Polio, and the world has been changed for the better.
Emotional IQ is also the ability to look inward, and to assess our behavior, and determine if our actions are hurting others and whether or not we are presenting ourselves to others as we think we are to ourselves. I think that's got to be the greatest gift we give to ourselves... the willingness to look inward.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I worry about this "smart/intelligent" conversation we're having at the moment. It is true that non-believers and "liberals" are better read, and it can be said that they're more open to education, but are they "smarter"? And when I say that I'm not just talking about IQ. Are they balanced, open, compassionate... in other words, what's their "emotion IQ."
There's a movement afoot among non-theists to disavow all emotion and focus only on reason. The problem is, emotions are built into us, and they are what motivates us. To try and subdue them, even in the name of reason only makes us more unreasonable. We have emotions for a reason. They tell us what's going on. Fear tells us that our lives may be in peril. Anger tells us that our values or boundaries have been violated. Guilt tells us that we have violated our own values. Hate tells us that someone or something seeks to do harm and we must forever put space between that.
These are generalities, I know, but it's a place to start. The ability to see from another's point of view, to recognize why they might be reacting as they do... all those things make us gentler, kinder people, and that also makes our actual knowledge even more needed. It was Jonas Salk's compassion that drove him to find a cure for Polio, and the world has been changed for the better.
Emotional IQ is also the ability to look inward, and to assess our behavior, and determine if our actions are hurting others and whether or not we are presenting ourselves to others as we think we are to ourselves. I think that's got to be the greatest gift we give to ourselves... the willingness to look inward.
What are you here for?
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I was told that after I hit the highest level, I would be promoted to Admiral and be Lord Vadar's personal attache.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I was told that after I hit the highest level, I would be promoted to Admiral and be Lord Vadar's personal attache.
Okay single folks, how are you spending Valentine's day?
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
Well, I would love to actually have someone to spend VD with at some point. It seems like a great way to spend a day. That being said, I guess I'll just have a couple of drinks and watch Hallmark.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
Well, I would love to actually have someone to spend VD with at some point. It seems like a great way to spend a day. That being said, I guess I'll just have a couple of drinks and watch Hallmark.
Ghosts are as mythical as God but what if an atheist believes in Ghosts.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I don't care that they believe, but as long as they're not going to try and convince me that I need to believe too. And it's highly unlikely I'll hear their story without wondering if that's they're brain playing tricks on them.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I don't care that they believe, but as long as they're not going to try and convince me that I need to believe too. And it's highly unlikely I'll hear their story without wondering if that's they're brain playing tricks on them.
"I still say a church steeple with a lightning rod on top shows a lack of confidence"
Doug McLeod...
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
Here is the church, here is the steeple, open the door and see all the people pretending to be something they're not.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
Here is the church, here is the steeple, open the door and see all the people pretending to be something they're not.
Proofreading Matters
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I wonder what types of lenses they have to use, and how they light the place.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I wonder what types of lenses they have to use, and how they light the place.
Everyone & their dog is fretting about tomorrow, being valentine's day, even non-believers: saint ...
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I call it VD. Still, it might be fun one of these years to actually have someone to celebrate VD with. ;)
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
I call it VD. Still, it might be fun one of these years to actually have someone to celebrate VD with. ;)
Took me a minute ... LMAO!!!!
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
Tuna... it's the chicken of the sea.
Benthoven comments on Feb 13, 2018:
Tuna... it's the chicken of the sea.
From the movie Interstellar:
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
It makes for a great time-travel movie.
I have wondered about this a lot. Is there such a thing as love outside of our existence. For example, is there anything in the Universe that experiences love. Would people from other societies on other planets know what love was? After all, our default emotion is fear and self-preservation. Love seems to be something added later to help us care for our young and ensure there would be a next generation. But love also comes with vulnerability. The ability to love seems to be tied with how vulnerable we're willing to be with the objects of that love.
It's just stuff I think about a lot.
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
It makes for a great time-travel movie.
I have wondered about this a lot. Is there such a thing as love outside of our existence. For example, is there anything in the Universe that experiences love. Would people from other societies on other planets know what love was? After all, our default emotion is fear and self-preservation. Love seems to be something added later to help us care for our young and ensure there would be a next generation. But love also comes with vulnerability. The ability to love seems to be tied with how vulnerable we're willing to be with the objects of that love.
It's just stuff I think about a lot.
Most common atheist stereotypes or misconceptions you've encountered?
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
Although I think the education will have an affect on how a person will relate to the current and popular mythology. When you don't understand how science works, comments like "believing in evolution is like believing a tornado came and built a jet airplane." If you don't understand how medicine works it's easier to convince someone to pay a shaman for a cure for your cancer, or eat only red peppers, or go on a colon cleanse.
Although there's another element that I see that transcends education: and that is "wisdom." I don't quite know how to define it, but there are those who have a certain emotional intelligence in that they are able to think deeply about stuff, to be introspective, to ask questions from life. Those people tend to be more "expressive" in how they view the current mythology of our day. So they can believe, or not believe, or live somewhere in the middle. I also think that they can be much more open to other opinions.
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
Although I think the education will have an affect on how a person will relate to the current and popular mythology. When you don't understand how science works, comments like "believing in evolution is like believing a tornado came and built a jet airplane." If you don't understand how medicine works it's easier to convince someone to pay a shaman for a cure for your cancer, or eat only red peppers, or go on a colon cleanse.
Although there's another element that I see that transcends education: and that is "wisdom." I don't quite know how to define it, but there are those who have a certain emotional intelligence in that they are able to think deeply about stuff, to be introspective, to ask questions from life. Those people tend to be more "expressive" in how they view the current mythology of our day. So they can believe, or not believe, or live somewhere in the middle. I also think that they can be much more open to other opinions.
Can a moderate have a place in this agnostic site?
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
That's what I love about being agnostic... it's a big tent with lots of options. That being said, I personally draw the line with Deepak Chopra. ;)
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
That's what I love about being agnostic... it's a big tent with lots of options. That being said, I personally draw the line with Deepak Chopra. ;)
But let's be honest
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
See, that's what I'M talkin' about!
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
See, that's what I'M talkin' about!
Hello to everyone.
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
I've never had a QI... or IQ... or IQI... whatever it is. I never was any good at spelling. ;)
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
I've never had a QI... or IQ... or IQI... whatever it is. I never was any good at spelling. ;)
Has anyone else suffered night terrors?
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
I have had a few, where I felt something was attacking me, and I somehow had to "wake myself up..." and I tried, but couldn't. When I finally did wake up, I was exhausted and terrified to go back to sleep again. Fortunately, when I turned the TV on, it helped me sleep.
But I think there are biological reasons for it as well. I did a quick Google search, and the first site to come up was the Mayo Clinic. They said:
Sleep terrors are classified as a parasomnia — an undesirable behavior or experience during sleep. Sleep terrors are a disorder of arousal, meaning they occur during N3 sleep, the deepest stage of non-rapid eye movement (NREM) sleep. Another NREM disorder is sleepwalking, which can occur together with sleep terrors.
I had a really good friend who had the sleepwalking disorder. When he lived alone, he woke up in the hallway to his apartment, lying on top of the washers in the laundry room, out on the lawn of his complex in the middle of winter (of course it was Seattle, so it was rain, and not snow, and it rarely goes below forty). And he slept in his underwear, so it got to be a thing when the neighbors spotted him. He even tried putting on pajamas, and yet still ended up in his underwear. When he got married, a lot of that stopped, and his wife was able to run interference for him.
I remember one year I got really curious about dreams and dreaming, and so I read a lot of books, some of them just weird. I did like Carl Jung, though, even though most of his ideas are outdated, I loved he me made dreams and dreaming such a personal thing and making our connection to what he called "cosmic consciousness." It was a fun concept to play with as a writer, so I go back to his books a lot.
The Mayo Clinic also listed some factors that contribute to sleep terrors. According to them, "Sleep terrors sometimes can be triggered by underlying conditions that interfere with sleep, such as:
Sleep-disordered breathing — a group of disorders that include abnormal breathing patterns during sleep, the most common of which is obstructive sleep apnea
Restless legs syndrome
Some medications
Mood disorders, such as depression and anxiety
In adults, alcohol use
So for years I thought Restless Leg was a made up sickness. I jiggle like Jello in an earthquake, but I just assumed it was because I'm super hyper (which I am...)
Then they had to bring alcohol into the mix. Okay, that's crossing a line. ;) If they think I'm going to quit drinking just so I can get a good night's sleep, they have another thing coming. (Just kidding.)
I also felt exposed when talking about it... especially since I grew up in a rather fundamentalist family, and to them it was "demons," or "Satan," or some sin in my life. But hearing ...
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
I have had a few, where I felt something was attacking me, and I somehow had to "wake myself up..." and I tried, but couldn't. When I finally did wake up, I was exhausted and terrified to go back to sleep again. Fortunately, when I turned the TV on, it helped me sleep.
But I think there are biological reasons for it as well. I did a quick Google search, and the first site to come up was the Mayo Clinic. They said:
Sleep terrors are classified as a parasomnia — an undesirable behavior or experience during sleep. Sleep terrors are a disorder of arousal, meaning they occur during N3 sleep, the deepest stage of non-rapid eye movement (NREM) sleep. Another NREM disorder is sleepwalking, which can occur together with sleep terrors.
I had a really good friend who had the sleepwalking disorder. When he lived alone, he woke up in the hallway to his apartment, lying on top of the washers in the laundry room, out on the lawn of his complex in the middle of winter (of course it was Seattle, so it was rain, and not snow, and it rarely goes below forty). And he slept in his underwear, so it got to be a thing when the neighbors spotted him. He even tried putting on pajamas, and yet still ended up in his underwear. When he got married, a lot of that stopped, and his wife was able to run interference for him.
I remember one year I got really curious about dreams and dreaming, and so I read a lot of books, some of them just weird. I did like Carl Jung, though, even though most of his ideas are outdated, I loved he me made dreams and dreaming such a personal thing and making our connection to what he called "cosmic consciousness." It was a fun concept to play with as a writer, so I go back to his books a lot.
The Mayo Clinic also listed some factors that contribute to sleep terrors. According to them, "Sleep terrors sometimes can be triggered by underlying conditions that interfere with sleep, such as:
Sleep-disordered breathing — a group of disorders that include abnormal breathing patterns during sleep, the most common of which is obstructive sleep apnea
Restless legs syndrome
Some medications
Mood disorders, such as depression and anxiety
In adults, alcohol use
So for years I thought Restless Leg was a made up sickness. I jiggle like Jello in an earthquake, but I just assumed it was because I'm super hyper (which I am...)
Then they had to bring alcohol into the mix. Okay, that's crossing a line. ;) If they think I'm going to quit drinking just so I can get a good night's sleep, they have another thing coming. (Just kidding.)
I also felt exposed when talking about it... especially since I grew up in a rather fundamentalist family, and to them it was "demons," or "Satan," or some sin in my life. But hearing ...
I live on a Jehovah witness training run so they call about once a month.
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
I had a JW approach me in the parking lot of a store one time, and he wanted to "discuss" our ideas of faith. The thing was, when it we got into the discussion, I realized that he was really just looking for ways around my philosophy where he could insert his own ideologies. That's been my experience with most of these conversations. And the challenge is, churches like JW and Mormons and Evangelicals are on the cultier side of cults. To believe anything other than their doctrine, is to risk ostracism from family and friends, and ultimately... God. There's just too much at stake for them to even consider listening to others.
So when they come to my door I ask them what kind of porn they like and whether or not they have any baby oil. Just kidding, but I don't waste a lot of time. I love a good debate... but not a monologue, which is what these guys usually have. They listen to me only to know how to respond next.
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
I had a JW approach me in the parking lot of a store one time, and he wanted to "discuss" our ideas of faith. The thing was, when it we got into the discussion, I realized that he was really just looking for ways around my philosophy where he could insert his own ideologies. That's been my experience with most of these conversations. And the challenge is, churches like JW and Mormons and Evangelicals are on the cultier side of cults. To believe anything other than their doctrine, is to risk ostracism from family and friends, and ultimately... God. There's just too much at stake for them to even consider listening to others.
So when they come to my door I ask them what kind of porn they like and whether or not they have any baby oil. Just kidding, but I don't waste a lot of time. I love a good debate... but not a monologue, which is what these guys usually have. They listen to me only to know how to respond next.
When a church is destroyed by an “act of god” like lightning or earthquake, could the insurance ...
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
It would make for some great standup comedy.
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
It would make for some great standup comedy.
Can you enjoy media that has religious themes
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
In fact I can LOVE them as well. To this day no movie has made me laugh harder than Monty Python's Life of Brian. The Meaning of Life had some strong spiritual implications as well. Dogma, and Leap of Faith jump out at me as well as being stellar productions. And anytime Morgan Feeman gets to play God... that's a treat.
But I think so much of our TV has religious themes whether we realize it or not. The whole concept of good versus evil is a religious concept, but it plays well in our actions shows and Star Wars has Turned "the dark side" into a whole thing... In fact, Star Wars has a real strong connection to eastern religions, with things like "the Force," or the somewhat "reincarnation" of the main characters like Obi Wan, Yoda, and Anakin Skywalker.
Any show that involves magic or sorcery, or any kind of mythology is also pulling on some deeply held religious themes. Vampires are still killed by holy water. Ghosts must still actively seek the light and move on. Shows like Supernatural and Lucifer (awesome shows) play with all the religious themes humans have played with for centuries.
There are some amazing types of media out there, and a lot of these religious themes make for really great stories. It goes bad, though, when the creators of the stories take it way too personally.
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
In fact I can LOVE them as well. To this day no movie has made me laugh harder than Monty Python's Life of Brian. The Meaning of Life had some strong spiritual implications as well. Dogma, and Leap of Faith jump out at me as well as being stellar productions. And anytime Morgan Feeman gets to play God... that's a treat.
But I think so much of our TV has religious themes whether we realize it or not. The whole concept of good versus evil is a religious concept, but it plays well in our actions shows and Star Wars has Turned "the dark side" into a whole thing... In fact, Star Wars has a real strong connection to eastern religions, with things like "the Force," or the somewhat "reincarnation" of the main characters like Obi Wan, Yoda, and Anakin Skywalker.
Any show that involves magic or sorcery, or any kind of mythology is also pulling on some deeply held religious themes. Vampires are still killed by holy water. Ghosts must still actively seek the light and move on. Shows like Supernatural and Lucifer (awesome shows) play with all the religious themes humans have played with for centuries.
There are some amazing types of media out there, and a lot of these religious themes make for really great stories. It goes bad, though, when the creators of the stories take it way too personally.
Please Tell Me One Body Part You Hate Or Find Least Attractive About Yourself
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
For me it's my stomach. No matter how hard I try to hold it in, it keeps sneaking out there. I hate it when my shirts touch it, and I only wear baggy clothes to cover it. I never even take my shirt off unless I'm in the shower. If I go swimming in public, I wear a tank top. I'm grateful for all the stuff my stomach does for me, but if it could stop storing fat, that would be awesome.
Benthoven comments on Feb 10, 2018:
For me it's my stomach. No matter how hard I try to hold it in, it keeps sneaking out there. I hate it when my shirts touch it, and I only wear baggy clothes to cover it. I never even take my shirt off unless I'm in the shower. If I go swimming in public, I wear a tank top. I'm grateful for all the stuff my stomach does for me, but if it could stop storing fat, that would be awesome.
Who is Your Favorite Philosopher?
Benthoven comments on Feb 9, 2018:
Homer Simpson!
When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV!
The code of the schoolyard, Marge! The rules that teach a boy to be a man. Let's see. Don't tattle. Always make fun of those different from you. Never say anything, unless you're sure everyone feels exactly the same way you do. What else...
Because sometimes the only way you can feel good about yourself is by making someone else look bad. And I'm tired of making other people feel good about themselves!
I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.
Benthoven comments on Feb 9, 2018:
Homer Simpson!
When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV!
The code of the schoolyard, Marge! The rules that teach a boy to be a man. Let's see. Don't tattle. Always make fun of those different from you. Never say anything, unless you're sure everyone feels exactly the same way you do. What else...
Because sometimes the only way you can feel good about yourself is by making someone else look bad. And I'm tired of making other people feel good about themselves!
I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.
A flat earther group is standing in a town square preaching that the earth is flat and the ...
Benthoven comments on Feb 8, 2018:
I call groups like this "conspiracy theorists." We have the science, we can test the data, we've spent generations now studying this. But despite this, there are groups that deny the science. And why? To Creationists, the science is a trap from the pit of hell. To flat-earthers, the science is an attempt at holding us back... Behind every one of these groups are conspiracy theories, which is why they refuse to "believe" anything other than their own ideologies.
Benthoven comments on Feb 8, 2018:
I call groups like this "conspiracy theorists." We have the science, we can test the data, we've spent generations now studying this. But despite this, there are groups that deny the science. And why? To Creationists, the science is a trap from the pit of hell. To flat-earthers, the science is an attempt at holding us back... Behind every one of these groups are conspiracy theories, which is why they refuse to "believe" anything other than their own ideologies.
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