That ought to keep things toasty as we sit by the roaring fire, realizing we don't have a fireplace

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 18, 2020:

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A little help for your holiday get togethers.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 18, 2020:

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the porn star.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 18, 2020:

I hope he didn't fart and burn the house down....

You know in someone already tried this & thought it would work.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 17, 2020:

I hope they had a lovely funeral....

Nanu nanu

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 17, 2020:

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Canadian Problems (2 memes)

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 16, 2020:

Re: #2 the answer is that you are sarcastic not Canadian....

please feel free to share because with all this Christmas Star hype its getting nuttier than usual ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 16, 2020:

I have never found ANY credible evidence that Jesus even existed much less was born in December. Just another in a long list of fairy tales told by the Romans for political reasons is all... Keep in mind they were infamous for making shit up as they went along and their "histories" have been found to be mostly bullshit.

Even Mitch is done with you.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 16, 2020:

If it were WW2...

Opinion: Supreme Court's scientifically illiterate decision will cost lives - CNN

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 15, 2020:

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Taco Tuesday

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 15, 2020:

Shouldn't have gone through the drive through....

Too soon...?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 15, 2020:

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5 a day or more, give me a break

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 14, 2020:

Just keep asking them why they couldn't get a real job flipping burgers instead of making illegal robocalls....

A person's got to eat, butt

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 14, 2020:

Hungry, going to sell them for money or maybe just a sexual thing?...

Vaccines, everyone?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 14, 2020:

I love the Babylonbee one of the best parody sites on the Internet....

Rock on...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 13, 2020:

Damn you beat me to posting this one...

Blizton's balloon knot up close and personal

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 13, 2020:

Think about it there he is flying along with no windscreen and suddenly....

How can evil atheists not let the nativity be displayed on public property?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 13, 2020:

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The end of Captain America

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 13, 2020:

In the words of a Master Sargent I once knew "Go ahead and jump mother fucker..."

Got a huge kick out of this. [youtube.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 13, 2020:

https://youtu.be/WYbteM7KLhI

And a side of bacon, please.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 13, 2020:

Now I would make my own as a double with cheese and bacon but I use 93% patties and have an oven rack for the bacon because I like mine crisp. As much fat as that has in it if you ate those even twice a week you would need a quadruple bypass by your 25th birthday...

Yesterday was my 23rd birthday.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 13, 2020:

I didn't think you were the idiot who wrote that....

When I was a young kid in elementary school there were many dangerous contagious diseases common in ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 12, 2020:

Unless you were born before 1953 you are a liar because that is when the vaccine for polio was introduced....

Republicans Talk Secession After Supreme Court Rejects Texas Election Challenge After the ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 12, 2020:

These people are so stupid they don't even realize what they are doing is called sedition... How about we turn Texas into a giant prison camp for them and those who aren't a part of the problem can move out while the rest of the treasonous scum get tossed in...

Family therapy: it's just around the corner.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 12, 2020:

Parents are lucky they didn't try that shit on me...

Would sum up this year perfectly.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 12, 2020:

Sums up me every year....

Do it..do it...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 12, 2020:

An elf swirly...

Santa, get your leathers out you fat fuck

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 12, 2020:

Looks like Santa was lucky to get out alive....

Oh Canada... 🍁

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 11, 2020:

He even said "sorry"...

WHO will get this??

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 11, 2020:

Revenge...

Lord of the clueless

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 11, 2020:

Sounds more like Orc from the land of Morondor....

Hee Hee .

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 11, 2020:

And people actually believe these ...

Where ice cream cones really come from...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 11, 2020:

Mmmmm Frostys.... But where are the chocolate ones?

And my all time favorite..

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 10, 2020:

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Ah yes, the elf bitches are back at it again.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 10, 2020:

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Don't even ask about the eggnog . . . .

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 10, 2020:

Like some cookies with that lemonade?...

Is a $30,000 fine or gaol time reasonable with that meme that you just shared?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 10, 2020:

According to Comcast it is...

When you really need expert medical advice

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 10, 2020:

Oh look @BD66 is now a "medical expert..."

Good for him, I guess.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 10, 2020:

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Stay safe at home in your pajamas once the streetlights come on.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 10, 2020:

Please remember to have your next of kin post your obituary I am sure people here will get a good laugh saying "we told him so..." I am sure your boss will consider you easily replaced in whatever minimum wage job you work at as well...

Mostly Questionable Christmas memes.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 9, 2020:

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...Like Ice Cream??? WTF?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 9, 2020:

I don't know you can ask the rest of the people you meet in the cardiac ward and they should be able to tell you....

Public Service Announcement!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 8, 2020:

"When the ER nurse asks you what the fuck is wrong with you...."

Grade 4 math??

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 8, 2020:

Trumpanzee math....

A few aminal memes.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 8, 2020:

The first one is my cat's attitude towards his bowl.... No matter how much food is still in it after he eats in that one spot and can see the bowl he is convinced it is completely empty...

Ok! I got the message!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 8, 2020:

Ugh I get robocalls about three times a week from these scammers and I don't even own a car in addition to being on the national do not call list!

I'm sorry it's a link, and I'm even more sorry if you click it. ...Click It!!! [l.facebook.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 7, 2020:

Where the fuck is the vomit emoji when you need it?...

Worst case of morning after regret ever!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 7, 2020:

Kind of the attitude the entire Japanese high command had the day after... Hirohito had no say in anything by the time Japan had invaded China...

Good answer to religious Trump fans.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 6, 2020:

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My mom just sent this to me.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 6, 2020:

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Pictures with Satan! Funny typo and story. [friendlyatheist.patheos.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 6, 2020:

Seems to fit right in with the Capt Thunderpants appearance... Crispy Fries have no sense of humor....

Something for all you bird watchers here

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 6, 2020:

https://youtu.be/ZfYFx6MOTYU

Isn't capitalism great

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 5, 2020:

I see interesting times in our future...

This is an interesting topic, for me, pretty much everything i did

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 5, 2020:

If answers were honest #1 would be "Not wanting to go to church..."

Actually, many people are much safer, now that they commute from their bedroom to their kitchen.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 4, 2020:

So far we have more than 186,000 admitted dead from this virus and the curve is increasing so fast now that it will soon go vertical. We are already past the point of no return and in 10 to 12 days by my estimate more than 1/10 of 1% of this country's population will be dead from COVID and COVID related health problems. Doesn't sound like a lot does it?.... one person out of every thousand may not sound like a lot but it also means that with the number who are admitted to be infected being under 3% now and 5% by the first of the year that number of dead can easily top 2% of the population before a vaccine can be distributed. For the uninformed that will mean one in every 50 people dead. 320,000,000 was our population before the pandemic started so that will be 6,400,000 dead before a vaccine is available. How many members of your family will be in that number?....

Redneck logic

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 4, 2020:

I would have lit up a road flare and tossed in his lap at that point....

Just in time for the holidays. (just keep reading) 😉😄

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 4, 2020:

I dealt with their advertising department 30 years ago (such as it was) and believe me they would have loved this...

really catty

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 4, 2020:

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I bet he had fun in the drunk tank

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 4, 2020:

What are we going to do for entertainment on the Internet when Floriduh sinks beneath the waves?...

Going to have to get one next dr. visit. Hope it doesn;t turn out this way

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 4, 2020:

Only if you are related to the doctor....

🎶 All I want for 🎄

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 4, 2020:

https://youtu.be/z8LmMtScH3g

[youtube.com] Funny video and a great song

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 3, 2020:

I could have used a couple friends like that to help me get custody of my daughter from my ex-wife LMAO...

Agnosticism is the natural attitude of the evolutionist.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 2, 2020:

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The Season of Reconciliation has begun!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 2, 2020:

Let's put those camps Bush built to good use and declare groups like the KKK, Nazis, Proud Boys, Militias, antimaskers and others domestic terrorists then 'lock them up...'

Proof!!!!!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 2, 2020:

Alcohol also affects your driving Jesus doesn't....

I'm one of those people who appreciate the phrase "wonderfully horrible".....

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 2, 2020:

Sending this one to my granddaughter Celeste's father he has a dog and is allergic to cats....

A little picker upper

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 1, 2020:

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Warning, (I had to learn the hard way)

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 1, 2020:

Well somebody is getting ready to file BK and loading up those high interest creditcards...

So, God is a cat!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Dec 1, 2020:

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Whatever floats your house...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 30, 2020:

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Guess who's Harvard-bound?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 30, 2020:

Other answers... #1 Are the branches in the same tree or different ones?... #3 A pond has no exit so it still has 8 fish in it...

I always wondered what made them special

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 30, 2020:

Advertising money....

Shhhhh, don't tell.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 28, 2020:

Middle cat: I think I smell a rat..." Dog: Don't look at me I am spying for the dogs...

More fish now!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 28, 2020:

So long and thanks for all the fish..." Douglas Adams

Arrrr. Here be pirates!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 28, 2020:

Give her a broadside Matey....

good ad for an ancient auto ...[agnostic.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 28, 2020:

Beautiful cars but as far as mechanical dependability they sucked...

Aw! He packed her a lunch!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 28, 2020:

Wait until she reaches into her purse for the car keys and mistakes that mouse for the rabbits foot she keeps it on...

No-good dirty-rotten tattle-telling elf.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 28, 2020:

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Mystery no more. Suffer in your jock's flat Earthers! [scontent.fbne6-1.fna.fbcdn.net]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 27, 2020:

Probably the only way to get them to agree.... Give them an alternate conspiracy theory to prattle about...

If Trump had won reelection.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 26, 2020:

Actually this may still happen sooner than people think if Joke Biden doesn't stop playing games. But it will likely be the entire West coast, Canada, Mexico, New Mexico and Colorado that break off and form a new country with a good possibility of adding in Hawaii and the North Eastern US. If that happens the Red States are going to literally self destruct within 10 years.

The Why of the We. People are jumping platforms to MeWe.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 26, 2020:

No the reason people are going to that platform is that they welcome White Supremecist Terrorists...

I probably should have informed my doctor about this one... [youtube]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 25, 2020:

Probably....

Last supper...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 25, 2020:

Anyone who gets 2 or more is doing better than the average Crispy Fry does on the religious version.... Most of them are lucky if they can pick out pretend Jebus in their version. Question how many of you found Curie and Pasteur.

Naked booty shake?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 24, 2020:

Fucking Arizona.....

Not a Meme, but definitely a WTF?!!? Getting Fit With Jesus. [facebook.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 24, 2020:

3:20 time mark... https://youtu.be/7SZ2cDG84RI

Trump dump

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 22, 2020:

Right now the first one hurts because I found out that yesterday my 34 year old daughter died of the virus because she didn't believe in it and failed to seek medical help.

Name this band.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 22, 2020:

MegaMeth....

Water god(s)

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 21, 2020:

Romans never came up with anything original ever religion for instance was just someone else's with the serial numbers filed off and the names and storylines changed a bit... Come to think of it the Jews did the same thing...

Cats vs Humans

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 21, 2020:

Three links proving him wrong... https://abc7news.com/cute-cat-video-bobo-the-vacuumed/335752/ https://youtu.be/1nWMqVJrsgc https://youtu.be/vf9wHkkNGUU

They never listen.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 21, 2020:

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Uh...maybe a bit too stylized...?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 21, 2020:

He should have sent it to Rome....

Don't you hate when you're minding your own business and someone spoils it

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 21, 2020:

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Sometimes it pays to listen before you speak

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 21, 2020:

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Something I'm sure a lot of us have thought

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 21, 2020:

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Who else has ever had this boss?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 21, 2020:

This one is even worse...

One final salute to the Senior Senator from Vermont.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 20, 2020:

Stupid meme to post as it just shows ignorance.... All those deaths are the result of capitalism not socialism...

Public service announcement

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 20, 2020:

Brought to you by...

A dilemma....

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 20, 2020:

https://youtu.be/46LVYr3Q784

Follow me.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 20, 2020:

https://youtu.be/urglg3WimHA

Let's hate Florida!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 19, 2020:

I don't have to hate Florida all I have to do is stock up on popcorn before their next hurricane.... Not long now... https://www.fox35orlando.com/weather/two-areas-being-monitored-in-the-tropics

Just found this meme on the Circus Peanut's insane Twitter account between rants of fraud.BURN!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 19, 2020:

Who can't?...