Lucy_Fehr's Profile

If someone truly wants to be with you, will they say they need space or time to think about it?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 3, 2018:

Unless some life changing event prompted it in and they are taking a break from everything to reflect, I would certainly see it as a break up attempt.

What would be the most memorable travel adventure you have experienced?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 3, 2018:

So far it's a toss up between a cruise I took where I took in Mayan pyramids in every port and renting a jeep in Cozumel and driving around the less touristy side with my daughter.

What's the next fun thing you plan to do?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 3, 2018:

I'm going geocamping in a couple of weeks

Why is it that life breaks some people down, and makes others more resilient?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 3, 2018:

I've often wondered that myself. My brother and I had the same childhood but I eventually stood up for myself and he didn't. We both used drugs as teens but he got addicted and I didn't. As adults he became a violent person and although I am like a storm when angry, I am known for showing little emotion and having a little too much self control.

Does anyone think being somewhat cynical is bad?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 2, 2018:

Nope

What's something that has never (or will never) changed about you?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 2, 2018:

My propensity for flipping people off and dropping F bombs. And my eyes are gonna stay brown

Why Men Get Insulted When Women Agree With A Compliments

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 2, 2018:

Never thought about it but now yeah it's happened although most compliments these days are about work performance rather than appearance because I kinda like dressing like a refugee from goodwill when I'm not at work.

Im now level 6! All hugs are welcome!

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 2, 2018:

And be ready to stay there forever LOL

What is your opinion of the use of therapy dogs at the reopening of the Florida school where the ...

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 2, 2018:

Kids will often respond to an animal when other humans can't get through to them. They're trained dogs and I can't see any harm

What is the worst thing anyone has said to your face ?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 2, 2018:

At my age several come to mind but as a child I was promised a cheerleading outfit if I stopped being cold to my mother's boyfriend. After they were married, I asked for my costume and he told me I was too fat to be a cheerleader. My first husband told me he would treat me better if I looked better. I would have been around 18 at that time. I don't consider myself all that physically attractive but in my experience people became attracted to me after knowing me for about a year. But that doesn't mean I think I am ugly because I don't. So I am not fishing for compliments here.

Just curious how you guys feel about dating a religious person if you yourself are atheist/agnostic.

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 2, 2018:

I won't again. I have to deal with them in my family, work, most social interactions so I am unwilling to deal with it in a significant other. In my experience, they say don't care but they just can't help themselves in that they must try to convert me. I've dealt with conversations that start with "I know you don't believe" that immediately launch into why they do along with the ridiculous "I will pray for you" etc. Or they complain about how their family is hassling them for my failure to go to church but what really irks me is the passive agrressive digs at me intended to shame me into converting. As I said, I deal with it in regular life but I won't deal with it in a partner

Temper Temper..

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 1, 2018:

I am not easily offended but if I do get mad, it's ugly.

Hello everyone! I went to get my haircut and got butchered! Why don't hairdressers do what you ask...

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 1, 2018:

It has happened a few times usually at one of those chain salons. The last time was about a year ago and my hair was several inches shorter than I asked for. I looked like a man. So I dyed it lavender til it grew out.

Simple questions for those that prefer Women. What is your choice... Wig or Hat in a woman?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 1, 2018:

I have never dressed to upstage other women. Most of the time, I am dressed very casually; as in threadbare, stained or ripped clothing because it feels good to me.

Are you the only nonreligious person in your family? Or are some or all of them nonreligious?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 1, 2018:

Just me and the most assholeish of my children. Hmm.. My oldest grandson at 18 is probably one but just isn't there yet. My daughter thinks her youngest will become atheist because "she likes all that science shit like you do" So my daughter equates education with atheism. Interesting

Are you more calculating or spontaneous?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 1, 2018:

Im spontaneous only if I get pissed LOL

What are some double standards that bother you?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 1, 2018:

That I am immoral for not believing yet they are still going to heaven despite cheating on their spouse. Repeatedly.

Are there humans in here?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Mar 1, 2018:

I dunno; I go by Lucyfer at work.

Celebrity Atheists | List of Atheist Actors

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 28, 2018:

Hey. the smoking man's on this one

How well do you listen actively?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 28, 2018:

Probably less well than I think I do.

What's your favorite color?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 28, 2018:

red

I am having a time wishing for my old life back.

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 28, 2018:

Do background checks on the roommates before you rent to them I have a couple of really really bad roommate stories and they're from just a few years ago

Gun violence

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 28, 2018:

I had two boys 5 years apart that played video games in the 90's. The older boy was 2 when I married his father and had some issues. The younger one was simply spoiled The older boy had to have therapy around 10 and during the course of therapy, we all had sessions. Anyway, the younger one had to be taken off video games because unlike his brother, couldn't seem to separate the game from reality. The therapist said that some kids can while others can't. Now these boys are 29 and 34-still daily gamers and the older one is usually calm with rare flashes of intense anger whereas I half expect to find out my younger one is behind some swatting event. edited to add that I do not think gaming is the cause although I used to. Violence predates gaming and every generation blames it on something.

Has anyone else attempted university in their 30's+ (after years out of school)?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 28, 2018:

I did it in my 40's.

Nicknames: Do you have one? What is it? Who gave it to you and why?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 27, 2018:

At work I go by Lucy. Short for Lucyfer Or Lucy Fehr

Have you ever bought a home?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 27, 2018:

Bought a house with my husband in the 90s but after we divorced, I refinanced it alone. Sold it when I got downsized by my employer about 10 years later. I bought my current home by myself 3 years ago

There have been several mentions of the "political compass" in politics discussion recently.

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 26, 2018:

I take this test every couple of years and I creep more left and less libertarian as I age.

Do you consider yourself a humanist?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 25, 2018:

Yup I am. A dues paying member of the local humanist chapter

What is the best way to get started here?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 24, 2018:

We were all new at one time. You will get to 5 pretty quickly. After that, you have to go days without sleep to get anywhere LOL.

Does pineapple belong on pizza?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 23, 2018:

Yup. I also drizzle balsamic glaze on my pizza

How do you feel about Brussel Sprouts?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 23, 2018:

Love them. You can buy them sliced now and fry them but I will eat them cooked by any method

What is the worst thing you have ever done. (be honest)

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 23, 2018:

LOL. Nope

There's lots to complain about okcupid and such dating sites but I'm REALLY glad they include ...

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 23, 2018:

LOL. I do check out the questions when I get notifications that someone likes me. Usually do not have to go far before I see the creationism should be taught in school.

Church

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 23, 2018:

weddings and funerals are the only reasons I have been in a church in over 40 years

Want to See Gun Control Enacted? Support a Movement to Arm Black Folks En Masse | Alternet

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 23, 2018:

I fear even more cops would get away with killing black men using the excuses "I saw a gun" or "I feared for my life"

How important is it to people to have political compatibility?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 23, 2018:

Opposites attract. Then repel

I have come up with a simple rule of thumb: the more interesting someone you meet online is-- the ...

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 23, 2018:

I feel your pain

Does anyone fancy meeting up in Rome the third week of April?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 23, 2018:

Oh I fancy, but it aint gonna happen LOL

When Considering A Relationship With Someone, How Important Is The Person's Annual Income ?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 23, 2018:

I'm less concerned about what a person makes than I am about whether they have a reason to get up and go do something besides lay around the house all day. That being said, since my earnings are barely middle class, and I help support my grandchildren, anyone I entered into a relationship with would have to at least not be a drain on my finances.

Introvert, extrovert, or in-between?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 22, 2018:

I selected extrovert because I can and do engage strangers in conversation and am called funny by nearly everyone I interact with yet, I must have time alone where I do not interact with any other human.

What is your favorite genre of music?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 22, 2018:

Voted classic rock but like nearly everything except classical and modern rap.

Is the site broken?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 22, 2018:

same here

Have any of you ever taken a cruise ship to another country? Did you need to have a passport?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 21, 2018:

Not on a closed loop cruise but it is strongly recommended in case you get left in port or have an emergency. Last year my daughter took me on a cruise to the western Caribbean and we did not yet have passports On the second cruise we did which was fortunate since she had to fly home from Jamaica.

Have You Ever Been Molested As A Child?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 20, 2018:

From 9 to 14 and although the fucker pretended to be a devout christian, it had nothing to do with any church

Since joining this site I have had an ongoing question that I ask myself.

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 20, 2018:

Although I would feel a bit intimidated, I think I would prefer to be the least educated and learn something

Does anyone have a problem with scammers.

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 20, 2018:

Every damn day

How's meetup.com?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 20, 2018:

I found the local humanist and atheist groups via meetup but not only do I have to take a bit of a drive for the meetings, they are full of retired people that are significantly older than me. For the most part they are retired educators and academics but most of them do not seem to like social media or modern technology. Quite a few of the male members are a product of their upbringing and treat women with a lack of respect- particularly unmarried ones. They will talk over a woman even to the point of raising their voice to drown her out. In one instance at the atheist meeting, a man looked at me and said something along the lines "am I right?" and when I started to say that the way he spoke to her was unfair, he immediately did it to me as well. I have not been back to a meeting since and do not even pay dues for the atheist meetup because I will not go back. Many of those members are also in the humanist group but behave better because it is a larger group So meetup has not worked for me in this little backward town I live in

If you had to get a song lyric tattooed on your body, what would you choose?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 20, 2018:

Too many song lyrics that speak to me to narrow it down.

To Shave or Not to Shave

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 20, 2018:

I have almost no body hair yet the hair on my head is super thick even in my 50's. I selected pits because that is the only thing I shave with any regularity. I shave because the hair increases body odor so I do it for myself. I have never shaved my legs above the knee and might shave my legs once every 6 months because the hair is so sparse and fine. Don't have noticeable arm hair either. I do have ONE damn chin hair that I cannot see but others can. Supposedly it is 2 to 3 inches long As for pubes, I used to get rid of it but no matter what method of hair removal I used, I would get painful bumps that would get quite large and gross when it grew back so since it is sparse anyway, I quit bothering.

Your tattoos and the story behind it/them

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 20, 2018:

I used to have a fear of needles and got a tiny on my wrist 25ish years ago in order to face that. After surviving cancer a dozen years ago, I became a more peaceful person and got a peace sign on my upper back/lower neck. About a year after that I got a black rose on my right foot in memory of my grandmother and first granddaughter. I also got a Korean one on my left calf that translates into "never satisfied." At least I hope it does LOL The only one I regret is a moon face on my right thigh. I used to tend bar at a tiki bar and one of the regulars owned a parlor in a strip mall and kept telling me to come get one on him. I ran into him while shopping and for some dumb reason allowed him to talk me into getting one right there and then. Since it is the only one that I got with absolutely no thought or meaning behind it other than it was a decorating theme I was into at the time, it is a reminder to not act in haste Only the wrist is somewhat visible when I am in uniform and even that one is hidden by a bracelet I rarely remove.

I find true actors absolutely inspiring.

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 19, 2018:

I'm hooked on that show myself

How do you handle talking to a parent when they are politically opposite of you?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 19, 2018:

My mother is just one of those that says mmm hmm to whatever anyone is saying. Wish I was more like that LOL My step father on the other hand will yell and tell you that you are dumb or not listening etc so I avoid discussing i or at least I will not begin a discussion

Is there a reason we should speak respectfully of the dead?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 19, 2018:

That has always pissed me off. My brother was a cruel violent person in life and then when he got killed by one of his cohorts, everybody wants to talk about great he was? Bullshit

What was it that finally made you doubt the existence of A God?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 19, 2018:

Stories at sunday school when I was a child. I wasn't exposed to church until I was 9 and my mother married a weirdo. I questioned some things and got in trouble. I was forced to read the bible from cover to cover and still had questions but knew not to ask anyone at church. I spent a lot of time at the library as a child and must have done some research As a young adult, I tried really hard to believe and tried out a few other belief systems but just couldn't get into it.

Is intelligence or wisdom more useful?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 19, 2018:

Probably wisdom

What food did you dislike when you were young that you learned to like later?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 19, 2018:

Hummis; black eye peas; snow peas In all honesty, I never even tried them because I did not like peas and that was enough for me. I ate a snow pea to be polite in my 20's and loved it. Black eyes, I ate by accident and hummis was something I didn't even try until a few years ago because it just didn't' look right

What is your biggest fear?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 19, 2018:

Dying and my body not being found until it's decomposed And surviving a nuclear event; drowning; extreme heights make my stomach flip

Hugs & kisses.

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 19, 2018:

Good question. If I see it coming, and it is someone I do not know well, I will turn away but it does make me look rude. Most of the time, I just put up with it if it comes from another woman.

Hidden Gems found on a road trip.

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 18, 2018:

My parents live in Alabama now so my first visit to Enterprise was a few months ago and I drove around geocaching which often takes you to historical sites. On the way back I headed east through Georgia and found an oak tree that was over 300 years old.

So I posted something earlier that I took down because my intentions were being misunderstood.

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 18, 2018:

I am open to dating if someone compatible comes along whether online or offline but I am on this site simply because it is non religious. I can have discussions about all kinds of things without it being peppered with religious crap.

If the Object of Your Affection became allergic to your pet, what would you do?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 17, 2018:

I've never had anyone say they were allergic but my most recent ex initially complained about my dog living inside and that I loved her more than him. My response was "I've had her longer" He had been raised that dogs lived outside. My dog was well behaved and was good at catching anything you threw mid-air. A few years later, his brother asks him to watch a dog for a few weeks. It's been going on 10 years and he still has the dog. Inside.

I'm currently struggling with some stuff and someone made the comment that "if I had a husband,I ...

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 17, 2018:

Women of my generation were not taught how to do a lot of things. Many of them I learned how to do on my own but now I lack the upper body strength due to age and a damaged shoulder. Frankly, I am paying people to do things that even a man in his 50's could do easily.

Do you have a family member (or person in your life) that you just don't want to deal with?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 17, 2018:

My half-brother born and raised in Ohio posting memes saying shit like "the south will rise again" and "the war was about states rights" shit knowing my grandchildren are mixed. Every time I would say something but it bothered me enough that I unfollowed him Aside from my feelings about the southern pride shit, the little asshole has never spent more than 2 weeks in south

A little over a year ago, I was diagnosed with Hodgkin's Lymphoma.

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 17, 2018:

I had a relatively easy time with cancer as I had no chemo so I consider myself very fortunate. But I was initially told I was stage 4 and was 2 weeks before that information was corrected. Facing death changes a person. Happy it was for the better with you and I

What do you do that makes other people say "ew?"

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 16, 2018:

I will discuss bodily functions with the guys with no embarrassment. As a matter of fact, at a friends house I mentioned that half of what of what we eat is excreted out and that I have weighed myself before taking a dump and again after. The men all laughed but the women were like ew.. and I told them that they curious but didn't want to admit it LOL I bet they all weighed themselves before and after the very next time they had to go.

Why Do We Allow Blatant Bullying Here?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 16, 2018:

I haven't noticed but to be honest, I do not read every post. I probably only read about 1/4 of the posted threads and often do not read subsequent comments on the ones I do participate in. Can you provide some examples?

Who are you actually?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 16, 2018:

I go to some effort to show the world that I am unfeeling and am successful for the most part. People underestimate all the time and although it sometimes bothers me, I continue the charade. I am rarely serious and turn nearly everything into a joke. Most people think I'm funny or will tell me I'm not right while laughing. I used to say that I would marry the first man, woman or ET that saw the real me. I am not the least bit suicidal but i understand how comedians end up doing it. It is exhausting to always be the life of the party in public and yet spend most of your personal time alone.

Gun control? Yes or no and why?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 16, 2018:

I have always said no because I feared it would be a first step in taking other freedoms but since Sandy Hook, my views have been changing although I wouldn't support a total ban

To what extent do you believe "with age comes wisdom?"

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 16, 2018:

When I was young I didn't believe it lol

Have you had your DNA tested?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 16, 2018:

I did but it had a low call rate and is still being processed. I sent it in mid December so I am not feeling super confidant about the results. My daughter sent hers in 2 weeks after I did and is further along. I post then read. Then have to edit My mother is adopted and although we know her birth mother, there is a question as to who her father is. My father died when I was young and wasn't interested yet. Additionally he lied about a number of other things so the few things I recall may not be accurate anyway.

Does your hair salon or dresser listen to how you want your hair cut?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 16, 2018:

Yes she does and is super affordable to boot which is why I sometimes have to wait over a week to get in to see her. But I have zero complaints

Online Employment - Community's Experiences

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 16, 2018:

I have been thinking about picking up some work online but my skills are very narrow. I seem to be a whiz at proof reading and am asked to proof read letters the higher ups send to their higher ups. Guess I'm pretty good at keeping my mouth shut as well now that I think about it LOL I could teach or tutor but again only a few subjects.

Can anyone tell me what being "tagged" means on this website.

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 16, 2018:

The garbage can is there in case you wish to delete your own post; the rest of us cannot see the can on someone else's post

What do you know well enough to teach others?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 16, 2018:

How to turn any sentence into one containing sexual innuendo. Sarcasm 101: how to make everyone dislike you I could probably teach several subjects regarding criminal justice since I have a degree in it which was inspired by my family being either connected to or a victim of crime.

How did you spend Valentine's Day?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 15, 2018:

Spent the morning running around trying to get my daughter's car back because she waited til it was repo'd before telling me she needed help. I would never admit this to anyone I or she knew in real life LOL They had said they would wait til end of month when she would have her tax check but guess they didn't believe her. In her defense, she missed a lot of work this past year because her son accidentally ingested muriatic acid and spent a lot of time in the hospital over the last year and a half. Got on here for a bit, showed up an hour early to pick up kids at school, came home and started dinner, went back and got kids at correct time then came home and found out about the shooting. Spent the rest of the day watching/reading about that.

What were the major turning points in your life?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 14, 2018:

Getting pregnant at 16 Death of grandmother at 23 Death of father at 30 Cancer at 44 I could list all the aftermath- some of which took time to manifest but most of the changes in my life both good and bad stem from those events.

Is blocking someone on Facebook because of too many religious "shares" intolerant?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 14, 2018:

I generally choose to unfollow or unfriend unless it is a relative in which case I go to a little extra trouble by blocking the page or group they shared it from. Most people tend to share from the same few pages I have found.

So, I "met" a guy on another dating site months ago, we have exchanged emails sporadically, ...

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 14, 2018:

I get several a week that are captivated by profile pic. And they're always shocked that a treasure such as me is still single I did fuck with one once for about a month on facebook. I told I had a grand master that had approve out relationship and a bunch of other stupid shit I made up as I went along. Eventually I told him he had to donate money to a gofundme that I chose at random. He was pissed that I expected him to pay to date me. Another time I went off on one and called him all kinds of names and shit then the next day told him my daughter hacked me and did it because she thought he was a scammer. Unfortunately, both of those got me on a list because I was deluged with friend requests for a while.

What movie fucked with your head the most?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 14, 2018:

Whatever happened to baby Jane?

At what age did you first have a skepticism about the existence of gods?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 13, 2018:

Around 9 or 10

Hello I hope everyone is having a wonderful Monday.

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 13, 2018:

I like the truth but it is possible in most cases to be truthful without being an asshole. That being said, I frequently fail at it and piss people off if I do not stop and choose my words carefully LOL

Do you think your birth order has impacted your personality?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 13, 2018:

Without a doubt. Everything was my responsibility

What are you here for?

Lucy_Fehr comments on Feb 13, 2018:

Although dating or finding an eventual partner would be nice, I am here to hopefully find some friends for hanging out. So far I have not made any as there are not a lot of people in my area that god hasn't co-opted but I am still having a good time with discussions.

Tell Me About The Worst Date You Have Ever had....