Have you ever sabotaged a relationship?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 14, 2018:

Every one I've ever been in. I find that at some point I'm overwhelmed by ambivalence and will become extremely passive-agressive to see how much they'll tolerate before growing a backbone.

Were You Raised In A Single Parent Home Or 2 Parent Home

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 13, 2018:

Watching my parents taught me that marriage is hell.

Have you ever been fired from a job?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 13, 2018:

Yes, my first job at a Hoosier Pete. The assist manager left a garbage can of chicken out of the freezer. I didn't put it in the fridge because she didn't tell me about it. Needless to say, she wasn't the one held responsible.

Out of the many dangerous diseases, which one terrify you the most?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 13, 2018:

ALS. I can't imagine anything worse than having no control over my body with no loss of conitive ability.

Afterlife

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 13, 2018:

I'd like to be reincarnated as a spoiled housecat but don't think its gonna happen.

Considering you don't believe in God or heaven, are you afraid of dying?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 13, 2018:

I have no fear of being dead, hope to have control of the when but don't worry about it at all. There's too much that is out of my hands and I can't do a single thing about other's actions.

Easter

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 13, 2018:

Probably plan an egg hunt or scavenger hunt for the kiddos at work.

Do you have any dietary restriction or are there any foods you can't or won't eat?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 13, 2018:

I don't eat bread, limit sugar and don't drink pop all self-imposed because I feel better physically and mentally when I avoid.

How to 'come out?'

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 13, 2018:

Tell her as soon as you no longer need her financial support for school. No relationship is worth maintaining as an adult if you have to lie or pretend to be someone you're not.

Liquid calories. Yes or No?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 13, 2018:

I only drink water, tea, coffee or a rare glass of wine. Juice usually has more sugar than a can of pop. I gave up pop about 6 years ago.

Is what you do professionally now, what you wanted to do when you were growing up?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 13, 2018:

Not what I wanted to do growing up; however, I didn't know my career existed until I was 22 and my son needed speech therapy. I've thought about going back to school but haven't found anything that interests me, yet.

My desire to travel is kicking in again. I would love to go somewhere by railroad. Suggestions?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 12, 2018:

I want to take the ride down the Pacific coast line when I can take a vacation that doesn't involve time spent with family.

During a movie, do you root more for the villain or the good guy?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 11, 2018:

Generally speaking, the villian because their motivations are usually clear while we're told 'here's the hero...cheer'.

When wilI I stop going broke over his appetite??

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 9, 2018:

Encourage him to move out as soon as possible after high school graduation. He'll eat a lot less when he's buying his own food.

What Do You Think Should Come First, Marriage Or Kids?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 9, 2018:

Children without marriage. Chances are you'll end up on your own anyway. At least if you're on your own from the beginning, there's no one to interfere.

Getting Over Sugar Cravings

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 9, 2018:

Sugar is killer. I have to go cold turkey.

Moment of Silence or Saying Grace

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 9, 2018:

I fidget or find someone else looking around to roll my eyes at with a shrug and a smile. It lets me know someone I can talk to when I get bored.

If you knew that if you came out as an atheist that you would lose everyone you called family would ...

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 9, 2018:

Absolutely, anyone who would turn their backs on me isn't worth having in my life. I've tolerated their beliefs, they owe me the same consideration.

What is your average monthly budget/expenditures for food? Be it grocery and/or prepared foods.

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 9, 2018:

I spend a fortune but always have a full freezer and pantry,

How do you react when people say “ I’m praying for you “ ?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 9, 2018:

Thank you. As misguided as they are it's comimg from a good place.

Eating while watching medical shows.

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 8, 2018:

I used to watch Tauma: Life in the ER nightly at dinnertime. I can always eat.

If you had one wish that you were guaranteed to come true would you choose something for yourself, ...

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 8, 2018:

All babies born would be healthy. I see way too many unhealthy babies and children every day.

What do you do for a living?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 8, 2018:

Pediatric SLP. If I could do anything, I'd probably be a librarian.

Do you find yourself still telling people to go to hell, even though you know there is no such ...

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 8, 2018:

Sure do. They believe in it.

What's the most "sinful" thing you've ever done?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 8, 2018:

I've never committed a 'sin' though I have many fun 'wrong' things.

Hey ladies, what is your opinion on child support?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 8, 2018:

It cost me more than 20% of my income to support my child and my ex couldn't be bothered to kick in $60 a week because "he had a family of his own" to support.

If There Is No God, Murder Isn't Wrong - Christopher Hitchens responds from the grave - YouTube

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 8, 2018:

If there is a god, then murder is not wrong. Obviously, god wanted them dead or he would have saved them right? I heard about god answering prayers the whole time I was growing up, but no one could give me an acceptable answer to that one.

When did you KNOW you were agnostic or atheist?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 7, 2018:

Honestly, I went to church and was even baptized without ever giving it any thought. I went along because life was easier when I didn't cross my mother. One day when my son was in high school, he was filling out some kind of form and asked if we were Christian. I responded without thinking and said, "I'm not a christian." His response: Does grandma know?

Going on 10 years being a closet atheist, in my case a "shadow mormon", and it's very challenging! ...

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 7, 2018:

I'm a truly horrible person. If my mom had said something like that to me, my reaction would have been to say, "Do what you have to do" then walk away.

Do you bring lunch to work or eat out?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 7, 2018:

Eat at home 2 work days and take lunch 2 days. The days at home I have a 2.5 and 3 hour break in the middle of the day. The days I eat at work I only have my 1 hour lunch break.

Think for yourself and question authority...any of you take this advice to heart?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 7, 2018:

I drive most people crazy because I never outgrew the WHY? stage of development.

If applicable, how did you quit smoking?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 7, 2018:

Cold turkey. I decided that I wasn't going to smoke anymore and didn't.

Kindle worth getting?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 7, 2018:

I love my kindle for travel. I just throw it in my bag and I'm set for 2 weeks. My son got me 6 months of kindle unlimited one year for christmas. I've kept it up ever since.

I am really down about my new job.

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 7, 2018:

I'll give you the same advice I just gave my son...give it some time. BUT, keep an eye out for an opportunity to find a job that doesn't make you miserable. No amount of money is worth your peace of mind.

What's something that has never (or will never) changed about you?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 7, 2018:

Resistance to any type of authority or groupthink. I find very little value in popular ideas, objects or really anything. If everyone is doing it or wants it, I don't.

Fear, is it a motivator in your life?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 7, 2018:

I don't think its fear. More like an acceptance of the reality that everything can change tomorrow. All we have is now, make the most of it.

Your version of a Healthy Relationship?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 7, 2018:

Separate spaces. Independent lives that come together for shared activities. No pouting...if there is a problem, say so.

Are you a night owl, a morning person, or both?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 7, 2018:

I'm up early every morming and stay up late every night. I find myself needing an afternoon nap around 3:00. Unfortunately, I'm usually at work.

If you are atheist, what information led you to this?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 6, 2018:

Nothing ever convinced me that god exists or that religion was anything other than nonsense.

Informal Poll - Your Politics

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 6, 2018:

I'd classify myself as liberal with libertarian leanings. I generally believe if no one is getting hurt leave'em alone. MYOB

Would you accept a job or position within a company that was built around religious beliefs?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 6, 2018:

It would depend on how badly I needed a job. I would never leave a job to take a job with a place like that, but if I were to find myself unemployed, I wouldn't turn down employment. I would continue looking for another position that better suited me.

Do you ever quote Theodor Geisel?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 5, 2018:

No, but I read a section of Cat in the Hat to go with a Thing 1 painting activity at work on Thursday and Friday.

Why did you get married?

PhoebeCat comments on Mar 4, 2018:

Today would have been my 29th wedding anniversary. I got married for 2 reasons. I loved him and for some reason getting married was important to him, so I went along. Added bonus, it got me out of my mother's house.

What is something you should never say to the opposite sex?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 28, 2018:

Are you done yet? Can I watch TV?

Do you prefer showers or baths?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 28, 2018:

Bath unless I'm actually dirty then I'll wash quickly in the shower before soaking in a hot bath.

Why would anyone want to be asexual?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 28, 2018:

It's not want. It just is. Why would anyone want to be heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual or any other for that matter?

What pay rate would you be satisfied with?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 28, 2018:

$100k/year. I don't need a lot of things, but I've put off many experiences to get to this point in my life and am unwilling to give up the opportunities anymore.

Are you a romantic person?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 28, 2018:

I don't have a romantic bone in my body. I tend toward the cynical side of things. In fact, my first question whenever does something romantic is 'what do you want?'. The second 'what did you do?'

What Are Your Views On Cosmetic Surgery

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 28, 2018:

I'd never do it but not because of a judgment of plastic surgery. My problem is a total lack of trust in doctors. I'm not certain I would have medically necessary surgery, but know I wouldn't submit myself to elective surgery.

What creative outlets do you enjoy?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 28, 2018:

I head into the kitchen to bake something. Cooking is fun, but baking is my true passion.

How long have you been an atheist or an agnostic?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 28, 2018:

I never believed. I went through the motions without ever professing belief. I just let people assume because it was easier to avoid the hassle. I officially 'left' the church in 2004.

How did it go for you when you came out as an atheist?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 28, 2018:

My family didn't react much. I don't think they have a clue what to make of me because everything about my life is so different from theirs. The distance helps because my physically closest relative lives over 4 hours away and the majority are 1900+ miles away. There's not a lot of interaction.

OPNIONS

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 28, 2018:

Children need to be surrounded by supportive people who love them gender is irrelevant.

Has anyone else attempted university in their 30's+ (after years out of school)?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 28, 2018:

I started at 28 (1999) and finished my masters degree at 33 (2004). I found I had a much easier time than my younger peers because I knew what I wanted and was very focused on achieving my goals.

Has anyone read the, "Left Behind" books?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

I read them years ago. I can't remember anything about them.

GOPer: God Forgave Me For Pressuring My Mistress To Have An Abortion - The Intellectualist

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

Convenient the way people grant themselves absolution, isn't it? The most amazing thing is that they manage to convince other people to believe them.

Toilet seat etiquette.

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

In my house, toilet lid down when not in use and paper over. I do the same when I visit other houses.

Was I blocked from posting?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

No. I see ya.

Can a "normal" upper middle class blue/white collar person truly love a mentally ill disabled ...

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

Yes, but getting the opportunity may be a challenge. It takes a special person to be open to a relationship with someone with a disability.

If you had the chance to start over with someone, would you go back and meet them again or choose ...

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

As good as a second chance sounds, I'd probably make the same mistakes again or even worse.

FAFSA was approved today! I'm going to college!

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

Congratulations!!!

Have you ever bought a home?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

No, I've never bought a home and don't plan to ever.

How has the influence of your immediate family and that of your extended family influenced the ...

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

Everything I am is a result of trying not to be like them. I don't know if I'm better or worse, but my mistakes are all my own.

What goes through your head when you see someone wearing a cross necklace?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

Usually, pretty necklace. I don't wear jewelry often because of work, but I love me some sparklies.

What do you think?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

I think as a general rule most people need to feel needed and long time singles may want a partner but don't need a partner.

INDOORS OR OUTDOORS?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

My cat was indoor/outdoor until I moved to the desert. Even then, she was let out occasionally. Now, she's indoor only because she's over 16 with absolutely no survival skills because I destroyed her ability to "cat". If I had it to over, I'd let her out more.

Why do people think you need to believe in a god and read the bible and or go to church to live a ...

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

Honestly, I believe they are looking for an easy way out that lets them avoid taking responsibility for their own actions. The whole 'if you do this' everything will eventually be great.

Does anyone else enjoy saying goddamn in front of Christian's or is it just me?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

My personal favorite Goddamn Jesus fucking Christ. If I can reasonably add 'to hell', I do. Makes me smile because the ones who are offended are usually the ones who complain about the "poor little snowflake libtards needing a safe place".

How would you feel if a surgeon asked you to pray with him before he operates on your family member?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

I'd ask for a qualified surgeon because he doesn't believe in his ability to successfully complete the procedure.

Is there a lesson to be learned from a "failed relationship?"

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

The thing to be learned is that all relationships have a beginning, middle and end. Don't look at it as a failure. It's an opportunity. The end of a relationship is a time for reflection - what worked, what didn't, and what should "I" do differently?

When was the last time you fell in love?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 27, 2018:

December 2004 was over it by January 2006. I never plan on doing it again. I honestly don't think I have it in me to maintain any relationship deeper than friendship.

Do you think the religious really believe?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 26, 2018:

I think they want to believe it for various reasons - some have and continue to do horrible things and like to believe they've been forgiven, the "God's will" aspect removes personal responsibility for actions and decisions and rich people believe they're rich because god sees them as superior and poor people are being tested for the ultimate reward that awaits them for knowing their place as inferiors.

It is frequently asked if we announce that we are atheists.

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 26, 2018:

I don't generally announce it, but I think it's very obvious to anyone that has ever shared a conversation with me. I took online quizzes that say I agree with 99% of liberal ideas, 52% of libertarian and <5% of republican.

Death or Old Age - Which Do You Fear More And Why?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 26, 2018:

It's not so much old age as reaching the point where I have to rely on others to make my decisions.

Statistics published recently suggest 42% of US households have at least one gun.

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 26, 2018:

I've never owned a gun, but I did allow my son to buy/bring one into my home after he turned 21 once he met my criteria.

Do you hate arguing or do you enjoy it?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 25, 2018:

I enjoy a spirited debate of issues. I don't have the time or energy to argue.

Which religion in your opinion is the worst? Islam or Christianity?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 25, 2018:

Both suck, but Christianity has a more direct and negative impact on my life.

What do you miss most about going to church? For me it's definitely the music and singing.

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 25, 2018:

Choir practice. We had our own rock band and made a couple of CDs back in the day.

How Has The New Tax Legislation Impact You?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 25, 2018:

I pay a little less now, but it'll end up costing me more in the long run. I don't mind the kid thing as much but losing the interest on my student loans pissed me off the first time it happened. I'm penalized because I used the education I borrowed to pay for to establish a successful career. Not having to support a child is priceless.

How are you all spending your Saturday?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 24, 2018:

Out sick on the couch with my cat.

How do you feel about the bump stock ban?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 24, 2018:

I have nothing against guns. I just have no use for them in my life. I don't actually support banning any gun or accessory. [unrelated] The hardest thing for me is not seen around here and this group gives me hope. The same people who are pushing 2nd amendment so hard are fighting just as hard to end the 1st amendment. Give them guns and forced Christian prayers in schools, and we'd be living in a perfect utopia. I'm not sure about everyone else but the tone in my family has changed so much in the last 10 years, they scare me. Nothing bad has happened to a single one of them or anyone they know; yet, they live in a state of constant fear and paranoia.

What makes a relationship work

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 24, 2018:

No clue. Experts say respect and communication, right? From observing couples that claim to be happy, there's usually an overbearing jerk with a partner that goes along just to get along. I'm kinda cynical.

When Considering A Relationship With Someone, How Important Is The Person's Annual Income ?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 23, 2018:

I don't care about income. I want someone to have a job with regular hours. My last relationship ended because I couldn't and wouldn't take time off work at the last minute and he worked when he wanted.

How was your process of leaving religion?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 22, 2018:

I just quit going to church.

If a guy or girl straight up asked you to have sex with them, how would you respond to it?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 22, 2018:

No, thank you.

Would you date/marry a Muslim?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 22, 2018:

I've never dated anyone with religious beliefs before and am unwilling to give it a try at my age. I absolutely will not be marrying anyone.

What is the bible to you?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 21, 2018:

Poorly written historical fiction anthology

What makes SCIENCE so believable?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 21, 2018:

A scientific hypothesis is formed and tested then retested again and again to prove validity. If the hypothesis is proven wrong, a new one is formed and tested until a conclusion is reached. Faith generally goes something like this: Jesus loves me this I know for the bible tells me so

Do you feel like the arts are undervalued in society?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 21, 2018:

I developed a long and lasting respect for any and all creative ability based on my total lack.

Amazing how much atheists know more about religion then believers.

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 21, 2018:

I actually listened to the sermons in church rather than getting caught up in the emotion.

The gentlemen I'm seeing, who's catholic, set me this funny picture and said, "I thought this would ...

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 21, 2018:

Seems to me you got yourself a good man.

Why is it so difficult for people to disagree, without being disagreeable, anymore?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 21, 2018:

Defensiveness and lack of respect for people. Too many people attack the person instead of the belief. For example, I feel I'm surrounded by intelligent people with stupid beliefs. Not stupid people. Plus, never tell someone their beliefs are stupid...no matter what you're thinking.

What is the purpose of life?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 21, 2018:

While I believe that life has no inherent purpose, I decided a long time ago that I would like to have a positive influence in the lives I touch. I do that mainly through my chosen career.

What are your beliefs and values?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 21, 2018:

Honesty, independence and integrity. I don't care if someone disagrees with me on every point. I can respect anyone who demonstrates these characteristics,

Billy Graham, dead today at 99.

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 21, 2018:

This is one of the times when I wish hell was real. If anyone deserves to burn for eternity, it's Billy Graham. Holding a spot for dear ole Franklin.

How to get someone to stop snoring without waking them up .

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 20, 2018:

Superglue works every time.

Who gave you the 'birds and bees' lecture

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 20, 2018:

My best friend in 6th grade. Her older brother told her. I tried to discuss it with my mother, but she pretended not to hear me.

Do you take after anyone in your family?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 20, 2018:

I feel like I'm a very balanced combination of both my parents, but also very different from both of them. It's really hard to explain.

How old were you when you first watched porn?

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 20, 2018:

About 13. My aunt and uncle had a satellite with all kinds of interesting channels. It was probably soft-core crap but where I lived cable is still not available more than 30 years later. Hard core porn came after I was married. I refused to watch porn that didn't include male/male sex. If I had to watch two women, he had to watch two men. Only seemed fair.

Teach your daughters to be breadwinners.

PhoebeCat comments on Feb 20, 2018:

I taught my son to always be prepared to take care of himself because no one was gonna do it for him. Partners leave or die without warning.