That’s one way to end a duel.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 25, 2019:

Talk about Johnson and Johnson

Illinois becomes the 11th state to legalize marijuana for adults! Earlier today, Illinois Gov.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 25, 2019:

I'm about 6 hours away from Springfield. Hmmmm

What comes after ....

RobertMartin comments on Jun 25, 2019:

The teacher asked the class to prove the law of gravity. So the kids threw him out the window.

The man in the hood is my hero [youtube.com]

RobertMartin comments on Jun 25, 2019:

Mexico judo. Judo know I gotta knife, judo know I gotta gun.

Howard Cosell ...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 25, 2019:

A tranny and a murderer

(Let me try this again) See kids? That’s how it works

RobertMartin comments on Jun 25, 2019:

Eve was Adam's clone?

What’s wrong with this dude?

RobertMartin comments on Jun 25, 2019:

That is the definition of so called unconditional love. See, unconditional love does not exist.

What's another word for Thesaurus? :)

RobertMartin comments on Jun 24, 2019:

A prehistoric lizard.

A lot has changed in 20 years.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 24, 2019:

I wasn't aware that Trump was a serial rapist

Sunday schools. Is it a form of child abuse?

RobertMartin comments on Jun 24, 2019:

And so is telling the children that their imaginary friends, Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy don't exist, yet drag the kids to church every Sunday.

Study: Trump Tax Cuts Failed to Help Anybody But the Wealthy

RobertMartin comments on Jun 23, 2019:

I know I didn't get any tax cuts, I'm still paying Obana taxes.

No comment

RobertMartin comments on Jun 23, 2019:

Talk about being stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Who knew there was help for this affliction....lol

RobertMartin comments on Jun 23, 2019:

I recognize the tune. It's from the Wizard of Oz, that song "if I only had a brain "

Why Men Watch the Food Channel - [youtu.be]

RobertMartin comments on Jun 23, 2019:

I remember about 10 years ago it sowhen stumbled onto 30 Minute Meals, I was digging Rachel Ray, and to me she's still hot.

Check it out...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 23, 2019:

It would be funnier if they were on a bridge. One of the avengers would say "damn, this water's cold". Another avenger would say "yeah, and it's deep too".

I guess it’s ultimatum day.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 23, 2019:

Maybe a compromise on splitting time between you and the his granddaughters, if possible. Obviously I don't know the whole situation, I'm merely offering a suggestion.

The free encyclopedia

RobertMartin comments on Jun 23, 2019:

I like the edited version.

The blue or the red what choice would you chose? [web.nmsu.edu]

RobertMartin comments on Jun 23, 2019:

Red.

Pollo tropical

RobertMartin comments on Jun 22, 2019:

The colonel don't want chickens with good taste, he wants chickens that taste good.

A perfect couple

RobertMartin comments on Jun 22, 2019:

It looks like there's a guy pouring booze in his hand. Getting his date drunk.

Alabama governor signs law allowing church to have its own police force

RobertMartin comments on Jun 22, 2019:

Aren't churches places where crimes are not committed? Oh, wait, I forgot about the Roman Catholic priest sex abuse scandal.

Roommates fighting ... 😂

RobertMartin comments on Jun 22, 2019:

And this is why I live alone. I keep the heat down in the winter, usually at 67 degrees. Can't wear tee shirts and shorts in the house, but it saves me money.

Pollo tropical

RobertMartin comments on Jun 22, 2019:

El pollo loco. Mucho loco in la cabesa.

Becoming a pilot.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 22, 2019:

I already know that I will die alone, I have accepted that.

Puntastico!!

RobertMartin comments on Jun 22, 2019:

Whose closet? 😆😆😆😆😆

Check it out...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 22, 2019:

Peeing or big dick contest. The man with the biggest tool Wins the pool.

I guess it’s ultimatum day.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 22, 2019:

Just make sure you carry out your ultimatum. I've had people do that to me to get their way. Knowing this, I go the other way and leave them standing there looking stupid.

Honesty in an interview

RobertMartin comments on Jun 22, 2019:

Or being homeless

Reassured?

RobertMartin comments on Jun 22, 2019:

Meanwhile at the emergency room.....

Hang on, it's going to be a bumpy ride.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 21, 2019:

Fuck yeah, let's roll.

I just hit Level 7. Do I get anything for that?

RobertMartin comments on Jun 21, 2019:

You'll get to level 8. It seems impossible, but I know you'll get there.

Repairman wanted

RobertMartin comments on Jun 20, 2019:

That is definitely wrong. Racial profiling at it's worse.

Me? I am doing fine!

RobertMartin comments on Jun 20, 2019:

After my last marriage that ended in divorce 12 years ago, life's been great

Owchies! It's even more stitches than i expected :( the ones in my thigh hurt worse though

RobertMartin comments on Jun 20, 2019:

What happened? I hope you're ok, let us know here, por favor.

I am really sick of living in the USA. What country can I go to where they don't hate americans?

RobertMartin comments on Jun 20, 2019:

Then fuckin leave already. Quit your whining and get the fuck out, simple.

Yeah, that looks like something else.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 20, 2019:

If you make it rainbow colored, well that would be gay lol.

As if chickens can read 🤗

RobertMartin comments on Jun 20, 2019:

Puk

So that's the answer

RobertMartin comments on Jun 20, 2019:

Why yes it does. It's also beneficial to snort coke off of her titties.

SORRY FOLKS.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 20, 2019:

They dropped the ball on this one. Maybe New York needs to talk to the people in Colorado and see how it is done there.

For those of you who like Vin Diesel and NSYNC, I present to you....

RobertMartin comments on Jun 19, 2019:

Groan

Over the years I have realised that my motivations are more philanthropic than for material ...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 19, 2019:

Working sucks ass, no matter what we do.

The pros and cons of being single! Just ran across these today.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 19, 2019:

Pro: freedom to do what I want, when I want and how I want to.

Justin Bieber is 25, Tom Cruise is 56.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 19, 2019:

Who all is 87 or older? Clint Eastwood maybe.

Found this amusing.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 19, 2019:

Maybe should've gotten gander reassignment surgery.

I, for one, appreciate the dedication to public service.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 19, 2019:

Why does his balls itch? Try washing them with soap and water.

Problem solved!

RobertMartin comments on Jun 18, 2019:

If the earth were truly fat, then cats would've pushed anything they could over the edge of the world.

Problem solved!

RobertMartin comments on Jun 18, 2019:

How did the retard that first stated the earth is flat get other retards to actually belive that bullshit.

TRUCKLA: The world's first Tesla pickup truck - YouTube

RobertMartin comments on Jun 18, 2019:

I don't trust any vehicle that runs solely on electricity. The battery runs out in places that don't have rechargeable stations, you're screwed.

Good Morning.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 18, 2019:

Nothing, I just live my life.

He does want a parade

RobertMartin comments on Jun 18, 2019:

So if Trump dies what problems are solved? Pence would carry on Trump's policies. If you don't like Trump, then vote for someone else in 2020.

Doe, a deer, a female deer.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 18, 2019:

So B-sharp

Well, I guess that's one way.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 18, 2019:

Call before you dig, you dig?

Probably a good idea to avoid these countries. [independent.co.uk]

RobertMartin comments on Jun 17, 2019:

Those would be countries I'd never visit.

Two for one

RobertMartin comments on Jun 17, 2019:

No, you got the right Grinch movie.

Is it too much to expect one man to be satisfied with one woman?

RobertMartin comments on Jun 16, 2019:

Personally I don't see how couples be together for 15, 20+ years. Over that period of time, people change, usually for the better. I would think that after 2 decades or more the couple would grow apart. I myself have not had a relationship last more than 8 years.

We Have Five Years To Save Ourselves From Climate Change, Harvard Scientist Says

RobertMartin comments on Jun 16, 2019:

I have a theory. The earth's axis wobbles possibly as much as a quarter degree. That little bit of wobble is responsible for both ice ages and global warming. Less than 200 years of industry is not causing global warming, the wobbling of the earth's axis is the cause. We've only been keeping records of weather for a little more than 200 years, that's like 3 seconds when compared to 2+ billion years that the earth has existed.

What would you have said?

RobertMartin comments on Jun 16, 2019:

I would've said yup or something, I let these people think that God has something to do with the weather. Most of us know that weather has to do cold and warm fronts and barometric pressure, simply put.

Good thing...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 16, 2019:

When you can take the pebble from my hand, it will be time for you to leave or something.

Adios friends

RobertMartin comments on Jun 16, 2019:

Should be. Adios, amigos.

Would you ever eat human meat?

RobertMartin comments on Jun 16, 2019:

Pass on cannabalism

Makes perfect sense

RobertMartin comments on Jun 16, 2019:

The cross is how he died for our sins, whatever that means

Have you.....

RobertMartin comments on Jun 16, 2019:

I think most of us have unfortunately

I think we all know who they really are.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 16, 2019:

Crockett and Tubbs?

[youtu.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 16, 2019:

If these Muslim scumbags want sharia law so much, let them go back to the hellish nightmare they call a country. Fuck muslims.

Even alternate universe Spock is in the background, goatee and all.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 16, 2019:

I almost forgot I had this one too.

I know nothzing...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 15, 2019:

That's every white house press secretary for last 200+ years.

Babes of Chernobyl - classy or no?

RobertMartin comments on Jun 15, 2019:

Careful, if she's radioactive she could possibly have mild, moderate or severe hulkism. Nonetheless, I'd take her on.

F@%& you and your best friend.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 15, 2019:

But Jesus does odd jobs for a reasonable price.

[aol.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 15, 2019:

$7 million dollars to Trump is like $100 for most of us.

I wonder if the European union is going to propose that a wall should be built to keep Americans ...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 15, 2019:

Now they know how we feel over here.

With all the rain, it is going be at least this bad.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 15, 2019:

Eating garlic will keep the mosquitoes away.

So they stopped making my hair color about a year ago.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 14, 2019:

There's absolutely nothing wrong with the color of your hair. You are beautiful just the way you are.

This is true life in India - but you just have to smile and hold your breath Harrods, the very ...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 13, 2019:

That's what they get for charging people to use the loo.

Mike Pence reportedly visited his conversion therapist Thursday for a routine gay-preventative ...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 13, 2019:

Why would anyone get that kind of exam unless he's a closet faggot who won't come out.

The electronic industry has progressed to the point that they can measure a width of a gnat ass at a...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 13, 2019:

Anything that's fun to do is either illegal, immoral, fattening or causes cancer in laboratory rats. We can't win anymore.

Gooooooood Lord...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 13, 2019:

She's no cougar, she's a damn sabertooth.

Does anyone else struggle with OCD?

RobertMartin comments on Jun 13, 2019:

I have a mild form of OCD. I call it VOCD. The tv, car radio or anything with numerical volume display, I have to have the volume set as an even number, 0, 2, 4, 6 or 8. The volume can be for example, 22, not 23 not 27 not 31, 24, 26, 30, 32, ect is ok. Sounds crazy doesn't it, I can't help myself that way

The Most Popular Slang the Year You Were Born

RobertMartin comments on Jun 12, 2019:

1962, I'm guessing groovy was a thing.

Who do you trust more than the Government?

RobertMartin comments on Jun 12, 2019:

A daycare center run by Casey Anthony Riding in an elevator with Ray Rice When I'm told that the check is in the mail Recieving oral sex from a cannibal

The infamous bowl cutting.. not very trendy.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 11, 2019:

Looks like Kim Jong Il, or whatever his name is.

Just try it...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 11, 2019:

Dayum

Bubble-heads found in a Killarney Ireland shop...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 11, 2019:

The leading actors for the sequel of Brokeback Mountain.

All about shits and giggles

RobertMartin comments on Jun 11, 2019:

It was about a year ago when I ate McDonald's. I was on a road trip, needed breakfast so that's where I stopped.

Okay. That's what this is.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 11, 2019:

Mine ain't no shrimp, unless it's considered a mega jumbo shrimp.

Congratulations Kynlei for making it to level 8!

RobertMartin comments on Jun 11, 2019:

G.I. Joe gets a knock on the door. Someone leaves a baby in a car seat at the door. There's a note attached "next time use a condom you jerk".

Congratulations Kynlei for making it to level 8!

RobertMartin comments on Jun 11, 2019:

Congratulations Kynlei. Nothing greater than a level 8er When us level 8ers break 200k, Nothing finer than a level 9er.

So, God is in control.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 11, 2019:

My condolences. These Christians claim that their precious God kills people at random for a reason. I lost my fiancee 4 years ago to cancer and people were telling me it's God's will and there is a "reason" for it. Been 4 years and I still don't know what the so called reason is. I honestly don't know how to respond when folks say this kind of thing. It has never made me feel better about the situation. Again my condolences on your loss.

Rick Dees and His Cast of Idiots - Disco Duck [youtu.be]

RobertMartin comments on Jun 11, 2019:

I haven't heard this in over 40 years.

I’ve been building a solid friendship with someone lately and it’s suddenly progressed to ...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 10, 2019:

Congratulations

She fell out of the chair! Someone help her get up and maybe she'll help you get up...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 9, 2019:

I'm already hard

Step right up my little window licker.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 9, 2019:

Funny Too bad there's no such thing as a soulmate.

Posted this on Links... (now in General Hellos) yesterday. "LET THE HATING BEGIN!" [nypost.com]

RobertMartin comments on Jun 9, 2019:

The best way to stop a mass shooting is to shoot back, and whenever possible, take the shooter out before he kills.

Science fiction done right.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 9, 2019:

Attack of the 50 foot woman?

Ha ha ha. Not even a question.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 8, 2019:

In a heartbeat.

Why is it that most men have absolutely no problem considering dating a woman ten, or even twenty, ...

RobertMartin comments on Jun 8, 2019:

I don't date women 10 or 20 years younger than me. The crazy thing I tell myself is that I can't keep up sexually with a younger woman. I prefer them to be around my age, 5 years older or younger.

Hilarious....

RobertMartin comments on Jun 8, 2019:

Too big or not too big, that is the question.

It’s faaaaaabulous!!!

RobertMartin comments on Jun 8, 2019:

See them raise property values in any neighborhood that they all move into.

More Americans have died, this year, because of guns than there were Americans killed on D-Day.

RobertMartin comments on Jun 7, 2019:

Just saying

Oopsy, forgot to do my hair.. Still interested?

RobertMartin comments on Jun 7, 2019:

Very much so . For what I have in mind, fixing your hair is unnecessary.

But she's too old anyway

RobertMartin comments on Jun 7, 2019:

Fake. Roman Catholic priests like young boys.