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I've been widowed for three years following a 20-yr. marriage. My late wife had dementia for several years. Seek someone kind for dating, companionship, and hopefully leading to a long-term relationship. Am now retired. My politics are very left-wing, Bernie Sanders-type socialist. Partner would have be at least liberal. Dating range is women age 51-69. See my profile questions and answers to find my interests, but I'll list some of them at the end. But first, I'll save some time by listing what seem to be the usual deal-breakers with most women

Full Bio

Comments

Are you mocking me ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 11, 2019:
Poor insulted kitty...
I love the new Justice Dems. The frightrned Dems addicted to big donors have lost their mind. ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 10, 2019:
I hate corporate, establishment Dems even more than I do Repubs, because at least the Repubs are more honest about whose side they are on. The Dems have nothing left to offer the masses but identity politics and empty, false rhetoric about wanting to help the middle class. As Chris Hedges said in The Death Of Liberalism, all these neoliberals will not fight for anything on behalf of the bottom 90% of the classes, so they stand for nothing, and most of the working and middle classes know it. They aren't being fooled anymore by the same old crap from the Dems like Hillary, Biden, etc.
A new couch ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 10, 2019:
Would Scotchguarding help?
Or... just as you are falling asleep.
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 10, 2019:
Smug and arrogant look.....Beautiful coloring....
For those of us of a certain age, how mind-blowing is this: "All Six ‘Brady Bunch’ Kids Are ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 10, 2019:
I did watch that show regularly as a kid, but honestly not interested in this renovate show or any of the nostalgia. I got much more cynical as I aged out of childhood and saw how fake and sappy the original show was, so, not my thing. By the time I was a young adult, The Wonder Years came along and that show fit perfectly for my tastes and my experience as a kid. I was born the same year as the Kevin Arnold kid on the show.
To all the begging lovers out there! Come up to meet you, you ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 10, 2019:
I sang this at a church talent show several years ago while my late wife was still alive, but beginning late stage dementia. The song totally captured my feelings about my experience with her before and during the disease. It was painful, but cathartic.......My fav Coldplay song along with Fix You....
Music is a weapon ✌❤
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 10, 2019:
Music is one of the things that have made life worth living for most of my life. Life without, such as if I were deaf, would be unimagineable, if not unbearable...
This...character is more important that reputation or looks.
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 9, 2019:
True that, but I also care about my reputation to the degree that if someone slanders me and I hear about it, I will be looking them up or contacting them to let them know about it, and, as Clint said in Gran Torino, it's going to get ugly, at least verbally......As far as looks, let's not kid ourselves, few if any of us will settle for someone with wonderful character in the dating scene if their looks are more than one or two notches below our own level of looks, like an 8 settling for a 6. Don't make me message Gwendolyn to come here and back me up again on this fact of life and dating.....
The beauty of being Atheist or Agnostic is that we do every act in our lives with straight ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 9, 2019:
I just try to do what seems morally right and fair, because acting that way seems more emotionally comfortable for me and allows me to sleep well. So I guess I am rewarded in that way even if it never helps me get ahead in the competitive parts of life.
The beauty of being Atheist or Agnostic is that we do every act in our lives with straight ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 9, 2019:
I don't know that I agree with it, but that seems to be the argument for non-believers to feel morally and ethically superior to believers.
And so it goes....
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 8, 2019:
I can relate. I am generally very articulate when speaking, but have always and continue to be tongue-tied when I try speaking to a great-looking woman that I am attracted to. If the woman is unavailable tho, it's no problem speaking to her because I know there is no potential and nothing on the line, so to speak. I am able to immediately move into friendzone mode and talk to her like she was a guy or not someone great-looking. I'm sure all this is obvious to the beauties that I encounter.
This doesn't concern you ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 8, 2019:
There you had to go and ruin my day......
How do you deal with manspreading?
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 8, 2019:
It is bullying and on airline flights it is usually tolerated by the flight staff. Everbody for themself is the rule these days on flights.
How do you deal with manspreading?
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 8, 2019:
I am tall and have long legs, but I try to be considerate of those who sit near me. A couple nights ago I went to see a stage play and I deliberately sat in the back row so nobody would have their view blocked by sitting behind me. I always try to do that. There was a group of guys sitting right in front of me that were clearly all friends ( all seemed to be gay men as well, not that it matters) and, tho I didn't say anything to them after the show, a few of them were regularly whispering or talking softly to each other throughout the show. One of them right in front of me was even making comments frequently out loud in response to the action so loud that everyone in the next several seats could clearly hear him. I'm talking normal volume for conversation. What an ass! I used to act in community theater when I was young and I remember how distracting that kind of thing was when I was on stage. Of course, nobody said anything to these guys after the no-intermission show was over, probably because they had some clout in the theater program and were sitting in marked reserved seats because they had probably donated big bucks to the program. But having money and donating it doesn't give you by itself any class as a person (esp. when you act that way), same as some people who fly first class. I'm thinking, with what I've heard about the hell of airline seating for the common folks, that I will spend the $ to fly first class the next time I travel. I can afford it if I only take a couple trips a year.
Alpha cat? Lol
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 8, 2019:
I thought only cruel young boys gave swirlies.......
.......lol.........
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 7, 2019:
I must have led a very sheltered life, but even now I continue to shake my head in wonder every time I hear about men sending dick pics. It seems so weird and incomprehensible.....
The paid dating site I'm on-rhymes with Batch-just removed 4 traits from its checklist of member ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 7, 2019:
There are always exceptions, and the ladies of Agnostic are part of that group, but my guess is still that about 40% of the women out there in the general population, which is who is on a paid site, prefer a man with hair, all other qualities being equal between a man with hair and one without. That is my point.
I shared this in a comment, but @sassygirl3869 thought it merited center stage. So, here is a quote ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 7, 2019:
I totally agree that doing those courageous things is the difference between really living and just existing. I struggle a lot tho these days to take the risk and live....
Newborn kitty
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 7, 2019:
Man, I've never seen a kitten that tiny...
What is the worst??
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 7, 2019:
I don't know which one, but in my case it would undoubtedly be a country song....
The Dating Life:
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 7, 2019:
So common and true, but almost never mentioned....
Do you have trouble taking that first step? I don't usually. If I'm attracted to someone and at ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 7, 2019:
If women at a bar concert or event make the first move, I am ok with it, even now. I can handle myself ok there. But making the first move, no way. I have no way of knowing if they are available or interested, so I will stay in my seat. Not at all like when I was young, single, and still had my hair. Ladies, try making the first move if you see a guy in public that seems interesting and attractive enough looking. Most of us will be thrilled to be approached and the truly nice guys, like me, will not see you as sluts or easy. We will be kind even if we are not attracted. The men who are not like that will be very easy and quick to pick up on. Try walking in our shoes. You will learn a lot fast and will have no problem being kind and sensitive to us after that if you aren't already. I should also add that in those younger days I also drank a few beers each time that I went out and approached women and I'm sure that made a difference, along with having piled up much less rejection than I have had since being widowed. I haven't drank since '96.
Just had a poem published. [poets.media]
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 7, 2019:
If I still feel attracted to someone as more than a friend, I won't stay involved with them in the friendzone. I can't take it. Maybe might reconnect with them after I had someone of my own, but until then, no.
I’m in N Carolina USA and am seeing ads for dating sites for farmers. What’s a speciality dating...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 6, 2019:
One just like this that actually had the numbers in most areas to offer real dating options. I am serious. Maybe also one for people who are childless by choice, because all of them would also likely be non-believers, hipsters and other kinds of fellow non-conformists. Problem is their numbers are likely to be just as small and scattered as we are.
Thought some of you might enjoy this exchange I had today with a new user
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 6, 2019:
Now Gwen, or should I call you Jenny, lol? Please don't be mean. I spied your pics and you are a gorgeous woman, so at least he had that part right, even if a bit inappropriate. What can I say, some guys are too clueless to know not to lead with that. Maybe he might have turned out to be ok, just a little inept. Aren't we all sometimes, I know I am?
If you knew of a way to use your estate following your death to greatly benefit humanity would you ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 6, 2019:
Of course there is. I am leaving nothing to my siblings and everything to my longetime loyal friends, unless I find another partner. Then I'll leave most of it to her and some to those friends. I am widowed with no kids and my friends have been my family and support for most of my adult life. My siblings have not been supportive during my adult life and they also don't need the money either, like most of my friends do. Depending on how long I live, there could be a sizeable amount to leave. It all depends on how long I live and what happens with my health as I retired young and have only a small income to live on ( SS) and use my retirement money to supplement that. I live pretty frugally and inherited most of my savings and retirement money. Hate me for that if you like, but I feel I deserve most of it that I got from my late wife as I stood by her and looked after her after she got dementia several years ago. Some of it I inherited from my parents and growing up in my family and dealing with the abuse and misery, I feel I deserved a lot of that inheritance too as I continued to be as supportive as possible with my parents after they got old and sick. I sleep well with a clean conscience.
I do remember the 80s fondly
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 6, 2019:
Me too. I was young and single, out of college and in my first real job. Very involved with the local community theater group and also enjoying all the punk/New Wave music that was coming out and going to hear it also at concerts and shows by cover bands at bars. Used to really enjoy dancing to that stuff too, but haven't gone dancing to a live band in many years. I also used to have a lot more hair then even tho my waist size isn't that much bigger......only a few inches.
LOL! I forgot about this picture of Lucky! It popped up in my Facebook memories today. ???
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 6, 2019:
Seems to be proud of all its teeth...
I know this is more of a cat meme group, but I thought I would share a pic of a real feline. I work ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 6, 2019:
Such unusual ears...
What Do You Consider Alcoholism
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 6, 2019:
I think that so far the group is giving some good definitions and examples. Addiction is a slippery thing and it sometimes can involve binge drinking and sometimes not. And we haven't even gotten into the subject of "dry drunk" behavior after someone has stopped drinking, which is a whole other discussion....
Michele Bachmann has made it clear she thinks it's the end of time, Jesus will come back soon. ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 6, 2019:
Even if Jesus was real and was more than just a man who lived long ago, I wouldn't fear him. I fear his more fanatical followers.
We all seem to be irritated all the time by the world around us. What do you HATE the most about US ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 6, 2019:
Don't get me started my friend... All of what's said below plus mindless consumerism and the widespread lack of critical thinking skills by the sheeple....
Tomorrow, I'm heading for a small festival in Pendleton, South Carolina. It's about nine miles from ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 6, 2019:
Going to see a stage play, by myself as usual, on Sat. then going to my monthly film club meeting on Sun. eve. Both events indoors...
For those who have a long distance friendship. Distance means so little when friendship means so ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 6, 2019:
I have only one LD friend and I wish he still lived here. I rarely see him even tho we talk on the phone every month or so.
Having a blast at my first punk rock concert!
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 6, 2019:
I used to love going to hear punk/New Wave bands in the late 70s and early 80s.
A group of cats is called a glaring. No idea why.
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 5, 2019:
They're all glaring, but they're still cute as hell....
I know we'd have threads before about dealbreakers in dating relationships. I don't want to repeat ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 5, 2019:
I'll briefly violate my own instruction and list my few dealbreakers, all of which are very important as being part of my core values and identity or how I want to spend my time. No strong religious believers or intolerant of my Agnosticism No smokers (tobacco) No country music fans No women who have college sports as their main interest or center of their social life. No conservatives No women who are very family-oriented or unwilling to accept me as not being very family-oriented (meaning not interested in seeing her family or grandkids more than once a month, at least not with me along). Nos. 2 and 5 are the only ones where I seem to have many women to choose from that don't fall into these dealbreakers. Sorry for the self indulgence here......
I know we'd have threads before about dealbreakers in dating relationships. I don't want to repeat ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 5, 2019:
Can't get it to add this with edit: Also, this woman said she almost settled recently in a relationship with someone, but didn't and she thought that settling was just as bad as being alone from having unrealistic dealbreakers.
For a lot of folks today, their "identity" is the most important anchor in this confusing, messy ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 5, 2019:
While here in the US the Dem party keeps pushing identity politics, instead of economic and democratic revolution (in hopes of avoiding violent revolution, which I see as more likely eventually), with the exception of Bernie Sanders and AOC, meanwhile the planet cooks and the oligarchs worldwide continue to rule and get richer as everybody else fights over identity and tribalism. If this continues we are all doomed, even the rich who delusionally think they can escape to another rock or at least move on to their underground or isolated enclaves to wait it out and escape climate change.
Just noticed that according by my Grumpy Cat Calender today (April 4) is Grumpy's birthday... Dare ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 4, 2019:
Grumpy won't mind. Grumpy is my hero and spirit animal....
Janis Lyn Joplin in 1968 Died October 4, 1970 (aged 27) Los Angeles, California, U.S. Cause of ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 4, 2019:
I loved so much of her music and she had such a gift and so much soul. Too bad that most people only know her for the shitty country song she recorded- Me And Bobby McGee-which became her biggest hit and was so uncharacteristic of her. I'm sure she was encouraged to record it for an easy hit single, but man I have always hated that song. I go to karaoke a lot and without fail that song is always the only song of hers that ever gets sung, as I sit there and cringe. It got so bad that once in a while, old white man that I am, I honor her by singing Get It While You Can, just to break up the endless selection of Bobby McGee as the only one sung. You would think that at least some women might try Piece Of My Heart, since it's been covered by Melissa Etheridge as well as Faith Hill ( for country fans).
The hard life of cats in an alcoholic family.
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 4, 2019:
This is great! The cat as disgusted spouse...
Lol... Mewbacca!
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 4, 2019:
Angry looking cat.
Interesting that most "thinkers" were/are in tune with cats:
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 4, 2019:
This one appears to be plotting world domination...
Rather good advice/example about consent. [facebook.com]
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 4, 2019:
Much as I enjoy sex and affection, I am so passive and shy about it that the woman would likely make the first move anyway. So this would not be as much of an issue with me as with most men. Of course here, I am discussing how it is with me and someone new. After breaking the ice, I am more confident and comfortable initiating.
Okay ... I've posted about this or something similar in the past... I think. When I started ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 4, 2019:
I visited your profile and looked at your pics. Based on the last one in the array, you have easily above average looks, which in online dating is all you need to get lots of interest from men. Out of all those opportunities, all you need to do is keep your head on straight about the qualities and type of man you want and continue sorting thru them to find ones that fit you and feel as interested and attracted to you as you are to them. I hate to sound jealous and envious, but I would be happier to be you and getting lots of chances to date from interested people rather than just sitting on the sidelines and almost never meeting anyone because my looks are only average and my lifestyle and cultural traits are too offbeat to attract anyone in my area on a paid site, where almost everyone is much more mainstream in their thinking, culture and lifestyle than here on Agnostic. I can't change my identity, cultural preferences, and lifestyle traits to attract women any more than I can change my baldness or find the will and motivation at my age to turn my average body type into muscled and toned. I am average in appearance and will never be more than that the rest of my life. And I can't take the risk of relocating for someone I meet online because I need my friends here too much to help me cope and hold me together. I won't risk leaving them and having it fall apart later. Guess we're both feeling stuck in our situations.
Something I haven’t seen posted (not that it hasn’t been but I don’t live on this site so I ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 3, 2019:
Some people are just mean, others don't know or want to know how to disagree with others without being mean. I have had little experience with scammers on Agnostic, but I have had a lot of encounters with people on these boards who are either trolls or just plain intolerant people who are unable or unwilling to disagree without turning it into a personal criticism or attack on me. I do have strong opinions, but I really do try to not attack or criticize others just for disagreeing with me. I have blocked 9 people so far and there probably will be more. I will try to be respectful of others, but if they use snark or sarcasm, for example, when I am discussing something that is serious or important with me, I see that as being mean and attacking as it is really just an indirect way of demeaning, belittling, or making fun of me when I am being sincere or serious about an issue or experiencing. All of which is actually a form of bullying, whether most people here are aware enough to recognize that or not. That type of behavior is a way of saying, " Your feelings are either overblown or don't really matter anyway" and for that matter neither do you........
I am the eldest son of a Austrian father and German mother and I have two younger sisters. Both my ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 3, 2019:
When people have the opportunity to cheat someone else for a lot of money, you find out who they really are, sometimes surprisingly, sometimes not. Until they face that kind of temptation, lots of people seem to be something other than that. I am glad that my father has made his bank's trust advisor the executor of his estate so there will be no favoritism or opportunity for this sort of thing when he dies. I and my siblings will all receive an equal share of the estate as he has informed us all of this. I'm lucky that he has always cared about seeming fair to all his children, so he will want that reputation to follow him after his death. I'm lucky my father was a judge and so he's always been very organized and prepared for things. So sorry you went thru this shit. Your sibling's behavior is the kind of thing that sometimes makes me wish there was a hell so people like that can get what they deserve eventually even if they don't get it from the legal system in this life.
I love how socially progressive the Dutch are. How does the U.S. still claim to be "the best ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 3, 2019:
I think that is a great piece of social engineering, but kind of ironic. Because at the assisted living facility that my father lives in, located in a university town, almost all the direct care staff are college students. They don't live there, but they are a bit like an extended family for the residents, which is what the Dutch program is giving them, as well as neighbors.
-> Lucy Flores. Comments? Do you believe she knows what happened at the back of her head? Does ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 3, 2019:
If this is true, I hope it sinks Biden and he doesn't run. Even if it's not true, I hope it sinks him so the Dem leaders can't stick us with another corrupt corporate Dem who will lose to Trump. If Biden goes down, then they will have to use Beto or Harris to force down the throats of progressives like me so they can lose again to Trump. Only rubes and the naive still think that the Dem establishment cares more about winning a prez election than making sure that a progressive candidate never becomes prez.
"Medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 3, 2019:
Look where it got him at the end of the movie. Sad, but inspiring movie.
Gracie is beggggging for food. She is about to starve to death. p.s. She is free fed and only ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 2, 2019:
Why not just one bowl? She obviously is not going to end up just skin and bones...
Update on my last post In case you havent read it, basically i had a potential opportunity to ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 2, 2019:
I dunno, I personally would feel weird about trying to meet up with her on the trail. Odds are you would have to go back several times to show up when she was there. I say go back to the restaurant and try again. Life is short, it's worth the risk. Good luck.
The paid dating site I'm on-rhymes with Batch-just removed 4 traits from its checklist of member ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 2, 2019:
Meant to say in my above post, which won't let me edit it, that I have no illusions that many women do not have an issue with dating bald men.
The paid dating site I'm on-rhymes with Batch-just removed 4 traits from its checklist of member ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 1, 2019:
What about the other traits of income level or occupational category? Would you want to know what the person was looking for in those trait categories? As well as what income level they were at?
The paid dating site I'm on-rhymes with Batch-just removed 4 traits from its checklist of member ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 1, 2019:
Tried to edit the post, so here I'll do it here. Wanted to add that there must be a great number of women that won't date bald men or the hair growth/restoration industry would not have so many TV commercials and such a profitable industry.
Rigby here created a menace earlier. Violently rubbing up on me, on my lap he knocked my coffee cup...
TomMcGiverin comments on Apr 1, 2019:
"Tired now....he needs a nap...." Now that his work is done, lol. He even looks naughty.
Karen? ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 27, 2019:
Kitty gets the last laugh on hooman....
Croby Stills and Nash made some awesome music. What are your favorite tunes? I have so many.
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 27, 2019:
Wooden Ships, which was a collaboration with the Jefferson Airplane.
Had a date tonight with a significantly younger man. Tell me about your experiences in older ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 27, 2019:
I had my only LTR with my late wife who was 16 years older than me. We were together 22 years, married for 20. It was the best years of my adult life. Neither of us had kids or were very close to our families. We liked most of the same things and had a very healthy balance of friends and time together as a couple, little time with family. I never thought that after her death it would be so hard to find anyone compatible or much like her to date, but it sure is. I'm not willing to date more than 8 years older than me now because I am now much older than when I met her and am in an age group where anyone's health can change drastically in a short time no matter how healthy they are when you meet them and I also have no desire to be widowed again soon. What I have learned from my marriage to my late wife is that large age differences can work, as mine did, if you really have the right things compatible between you and are committed to compromise and trying new activities as you spend time together and get older together. We didn't just keep doing the same things together the whole time we knew each other.
Are women aware of being played by a charming, subtle flirt?
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 25, 2019:
You're absolutely right and the worst ones in my book are the guys who use lots of totally phony, calculated humor around women that consists of very corny, self-deprecating humor so they look as non-threatening as possible to women. Some women just eat this up even tho other guys can spot this in a minute and later after the guy has got the woman hooked then he will start letting out some of his real mean-spirited and sarcastic humor. I first saw this demonstrated by guys in support groups long ago and then recently in a group for widowed people.
The terror!
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 25, 2019:
That is so funny, cute and appropo to the movie.
Snowballs. Today's cheese. ???
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 23, 2019:
Poor cat was scared...
If America has known peace for only 17 years since 1776, does that make them the most aggressive ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 22, 2019:
In a word, yes. The other top nation for that would probably be England, for the same reason as the US. Both countries have very involved in building empires around the world. England got out of that decades ago, but the US continues to expand its empire to this day.
NOT SARCASM, GENUINELY CURIOUS: Reading through the posts here it has been suggested by some to rate...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 22, 2019:
I think I know what you are asking, but I don't want all the drama it would cause if I answered you here on the boards. If you are truly interested in rating yourself or getting a rating from others so you can try to only pursue those at your own level or rating for looks, PM me and I will try to explain my understanding of it. Unless you are serious about trying to do this only for the purpose of online dating thru a paid site, I wouldn't bother with the exercise as it would have no other value, at least in my mind. The short answer would be that everything goes into the rating, all the factors you listed above. Your profile has no photos and you don't even list your age. I am skeptical that you are actually interested in learning about this.
Could you date someone that looks like someone you despise...enough that every time you look at them...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 21, 2019:
Probably not. I once ran into a woman on Batch that had a pic that looked way too much like one of my sisters. It creeped me out and I didn't even bother looking at her profile.
[cnn.com] Pete Buttigieg is the hottest candidate in the 2020 race right now
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 21, 2019:
Yawn. Yet another example of a Dem whose whole appeal is about identity politics. Nothing that will change the status quo. No wonder Joe Scarborough likes him.
In my online (dating site) profile I have stated what I hope to convey is polite caution... Women - ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 21, 2019:
I totally agree. I usually don't give out my phone number until at least the second or third in person meeting, about the same with my personal e-mail. However, to make sure I can stay in touch until then, I ask the woman how soon their membership runs out so we don't end up disconnected too soon from the paid dating site. I would also wait til the third meeting to give them my last name or address. By the same token, I would not ask the woman for her info until after the third meeting. Until then, we could communicate thru messages on the dating site.
Beto's Campaign pulled in $6.1 million in 24 hrs. His campaign released some additional detail ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 20, 2019:
Doesn't surprise me at all. Bernie's donors are almost all small amount donors, while I bet lots of Beto's gave much bigger donations than Bernie's donors. I bet the average $ amount per donor was much higher with Beto's bunch. I don't trust him at all. Along with Biden and Harris, he is being set up to be one of the annointed Dems that the party leaders and establishment, along with the huge donors, will try to shove down the throats of true progressives like me and Bernie's supporters. Just another sellout corporate Dem, people. Don't be fooled....
I have been having to style my hair in a 1962 middle aged matronly hairdo while playing Benjamin's ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 20, 2019:
Could you say some things about how the stage version differs from the well known movie version? I know that in the film version Ben's parents didn't have that much screen time, maybe about three scenes or so. From how you describe the hairstyle, it reminds me of Tammy Fae Bakker, or some other Pentacostal TV preacher type.
How could I not get my boy a bowl that has his name in it? ?
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 20, 2019:
If I had Munchie it would be so easy to spoil him.
Today I really contemplated opening up a standard dating profile (ie: pof or okcupid) again. Then i ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 20, 2019:
I can so relate, but I am determined to not die alone. I suffered enough watching my late wife lose her mind and die for several years. I know I deserve better than dying alone after what I've been thru.
When you show a friend (and I use that term loosely now) a photo of your new beau and she tells you ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 20, 2019:
Unfortunately, people with her values are in the majority of the world at large, even if they aren't the majority on Agnostic.com. I know from my experience on Batch that it appears the majority of women on there seem to care more about looks, money, and the status of a man's job than about his character and personality. But people with those values are not someone I want as a friend, family member or someone to date. No wonder so many of those women I see on Batch who seem to have these values are divorced, probably because they married based on looks and how much the man would impress their friends and family with his looks, job, or money rather than compatibility and heart. Let me preemptively say that all this goes both ways..... When I met my late wife, I knew that my family would not be favorably impressed by her because she was much older than me, so I took my time in introducing her to my family, because my family cares more about appearances than what is in people's hearts. They later came to really like her, of course. I had no such hesitation about introducing her to my friends because they share my values, unlike my family. My friends immediately liked and accepted her, no surprise. I often think both men and women make this mistake of caring too much what others, who don't share their values or really care that much about them, think about a potential partner instead of listening to their hearts and being true to themselves. As my friends said, if you pick the wrong person, you're the one will have to live with the mistake, not your family or even your friends, so you better listen to yourself more than them. Much as the Carrie Underwood song Before He Cheats is popular with the redneck, country crowd, I loathe that attitude of endorsing violence for any personal grievance. One of countless examples of what I hate about country music. Please don't lower yourself to that and instead just kick this "friend" to the curb.....
My almost 17 year old cat was sort of lethargic and hiding away until I put out this boot box. She ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 20, 2019:
My neighbor's cat is pretty lethargic except that she loves playing with tissues also.
Anyone having any luck out there?
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 19, 2019:
None at all. In fact, during the last two weeks I haven't even seen any new members on Batch that seemed worth messaging and had almost no views either of my profile in that time.
CJ when the movie I watching is not good enough for him
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 19, 2019:
Cats can be tough and picky critics of entertainment. Maybe something with birds or squirrels would be more of interest.
I'm posting this picture of Munchie being funny as he's annoying Mazie and generally just acting ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 19, 2019:
Munchie likes sharing food....
What's an album you would recommend everyone listen to once in their lifetime?
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 19, 2019:
The Velvet Underground And Nico-1967. Also known as " The banana album" because of the album cover having a banana that peeled off the album cover. Lou Reed's masterpiece.
So, l work with this 23 year old virgin Mormon kid, and l was asking him why he hasn't had sex yet. ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 19, 2019:
Sounds like a pretty weird kink, but then again, we're talking Mormons...
I haven’t seen anything here about Alabama being the first state to introduce Sharia law. ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
The more I look at the white nationalists in the Repub party, the more I see them as a mirror of the Islamic extremists, like the Taliban, Al-Queda, and ISIS. Reminds me a lot of what Carl Jung, the great psychologist said about the shadow self, in which individuals end up hating others that represent the other side or shadow of themselves that they are in denial about and can't consciously accept. A lot of spooky stuff that occurs at the unconscious level of the mind.... Which is why I fear these assholes more than the Islamic terrorists as these fucks have power over me and others in this country...
Rep. Steve King shares violent meme about Civil War
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
See my comment on the other thread here about King. King stays in congress because, like Trump, he really does represent the bigotry of his supporters. King's district here in Iowa is mostly made up of western Iowa, which, trust me as a lifelong resident of Iowa, is just as conservative as Nebraska, its neighbor to the west. A state (Nebraska) in which its congressional delegation continued to support Nixon all the way to his impeachment. These people are not rational or very smart. They are all white, religious, very conservative and have never had a personal relationship with anyone different from that. So they keep voting for King.
Rep Steve King R-Iowa posts meme about new civil war. Why is he still there? I [m.huffpost.com]...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
I have lived in Iowa all my life and I know exactly why he is still in congress. His gerrymandered district, which is mostly western Iowa, is the reason this state is nicknamed North Mississippi among liberals. These people in Western Iowa are all white, religious conservatives who have never had any personal relationships with anyone different from themselves. King, like Trump, reflects the bigotry of his supporters. But there are Repubs in other parts of the state who are getting tired of King's outrageous behavior that embarrasses the rest of the party in Iowa. There is a lot of talk here in Iowa among Repubs that they would like to see him primaried and beaten there.
Are we going to allow Far-right apologists or possibly even agitators a forum here? Or?
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
I hope one doesn't start, but I'm not in favor of censorship on this site of any sincere political viewpoints. We already have enough of that in the corporate media. Let the site's members see the whole range of poli viewpoints and vote their support with their keyboards. At the same time, I don't have any optimism or really care if they learn anything from those who disagree with them, I just want all viewpoints to be allowed as long as there is not continued harrassment or bullying allowed on the forums on the part of anyone. I'm not afraid of them, I can always block....
Has profanity become the normal way to communicate? I was around sailors and union workers when I ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
I remember the first time I watched The Sopranos and was awed at how many F-bombs I was hearing. I heard the record for number of F-words in a movie was The Wolf Of Wall Street with Leonardo Di Caprio with 500 uses.
How to succeed without really trying ?
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
Very naughty cute kittie.....
Cats on St Pattys Day-not mine
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
I'd gladly do whatever these two green- Irish-eyed cats wanted me to do. They are both so cute...
Has profanity become the normal way to communicate? I was around sailors and union workers when I ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
It depends. I probably have a vocabulary of 10K that I can use, but at the same time I will usually curse when I am angry about something, because I want to. It's an over simplification to say that most people curse because they don't have other words to express themselves.I guess cursing doesn't, by itself, bother me. What does bother me at times is the attitude or intent of what some others say, like if it is insulting towards someone who doesn't deserve it or if they are being dishonest about something. It's not the wording, it's the message or content that matters to me. I don't like cursing when it is clearly being used solely for shock value or to look hip. In those cases it comes off as lazy or unintelligent. Last week a friend and I attended a spoken word poetry event that was mostly attended by black folks. The performers were about evenly split between black and white. The founder of the program was the host for the event and he led off the evening by talking some about the program and then reading/reciting a couple of his poems. I admit that I am probably not that qualified to judge the performers since I am not experienced at observing this stuff nor am I part of that scene. But after listening to this guy and then the later performers who were much better at both writing and performing this stuff, it seemed like the host was cursing out of a need to look hip and make up for his lack of writing ability compared to the other performers. And that is something that I do find annoying or offensive when I encounter it regarding profanity. Maybe I'm just too much of a snob when it comes to performing arts.
New high score!
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
Fat and sassy!
I was only one when Woodstock happened. I always felt like I was born in the wrong era, I have a ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
I feel the same way. I was 11 when Woodstock happened, but my late wife was 27 and she was there. No wonder we got along so well and were a great match. I still miss her and wish I could find another old hippie gal in my area that's in her 60s today. This song was the theme song to that wonderful TV series The Wonder Years. During the 60s I was the same age as the Kevin Arnold character was all thru the show so I share many of the same memories as his. On the silly side of this, the SNL parody of this performance with John Belushi as Joe Cocker having an epileptic fit/seizure during the song is priceless......
I have been having to style my hair in a 1962 middle aged matronly hairdo while playing Benjamin's ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
Glad you are still active with and enjoying theater. It is both sad and true that by age 60 all the female stage roles are no longer romantic leads. On the plus side, there are still cool, juicy roles like Martha in Who's Afraid Of Virginia Wolf? or the lead in August: Osage County.
What does the “H.” in “Jesus H. Christ” stand for? (Be creative— this is intended to be...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
I don't know. I've just always enjoyed using the expression "Jesus H. Christ on a goddamned crutch!" as a way to express my ultimate disgust and feeling flabbergasted at some absurd situation....
Well, after some discussions with the lead artist, my boss chose to fire me instead of getting rid ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
The few times I was forced out of a job it was the same story each time. Namely that the workplace was dysfunctional and that the way management dealt with conflict in the workplace was to get rid of the person who was speaking up about the problems and was the newest person there rather than deal with person who was the source of most of the problems there who had more power and had been there longer. That is the way office politics goes at most jobs and I learned to accept that that is the way it is. I got older and learned to pick my battles at work, keep my head down, and try to avoid the bullies who would give me the kind of problems that got me forced out of the jobs I mentioned when I was younger. I learned that most workplaces are not open to change and most managers do not have the insight and guts needed to fix chronic problems in their workplace by standing up to the bullies and toxic people in their workplace for reasons that make sense to them even if not to anyone else.
AmeriKKKan Justice... you steal 2.8 millions... you go to jail... if the unpresident does it and ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
In the words of the bard, Bob Dylan, " They say patriotism is the last refuge. To which a scoundrel clings. Steal a little and they'll throw you in jail. Steal a lot and they'll make you king....".
This is directly from Quora: How much does Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez know about economics in the ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
I wish she was old enough to run for prez, because even tho she is new to politics she is clearly a hell of a lot more real and honest than Obama ever was. And he was not that experienced in politics when he ran either. If she was old enough to run now I would support her even over Bernie. If she's still in politics by the time she's 35 and her opponents, in both the major parties haven't been able to discredit her, look for her to be assassinated if she runs for prez. Her ideas are just too dangerous to the status quo.
Too young:
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
What is an SAT?
In a paragraph describe yourself, your passions and what you’re looking for in a partner, but also...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 18, 2019:
Doesn't talk about or identify as being family-oriented, has several or more common interests with me, doesn't talk about how they enjoy social drinking, doesn't list a lot of outdoor activities, doesn't talk about how much they love college sports, doesn't identify as religious, doesn't mention liking country music. Non-smoker.
I have a close friend in my professional field whose intellect and wit are sexy to me, and we can ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 15, 2019:
No, and I am very skeptical that it happens more than once in a blue moon. To me it seems more like an urban legend that some women, not men, like to believe in so they won't feel guilty about rejecting a man who doesn't sexually attract them. I have heard a few women, not many, on Agnostic say they've experienced this, but never anyone that I have known IRL or from a paid dating site. I have heard of this from a few women IRL who were acquainted with a man while he or they were involved with someone and the woman felt no attraction then, for good reason, but not when both of them were single and available later on. At that time, the attraction was clear and immediate... In my experience, if I and the woman meet for the first one or two times and I'm not feeling any physical attraction, it's not going to happen later on, even if I ended up wishing it would happen...
Date 3: I thought that I posted this last night, but I don't see it. I'm sorry if I'm making a ...
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 15, 2019:
I wish you well. You are doing better than I ever have with a paid site. The most times I ever went out with anyone outside of a clear mutual friendzone with anyone from a paid site was three times, with a woman who stood me up on what would have been the fourth time we met, for a movie. We chatted online later, after I got home and she had messaged me that she forgot about the meeting, but later she admitted that she had no physical attraction for me. Wish she had told me that earlier in the process.... I'm sure that in the coming months you will get together more than three times with someone and that in that process you will have more enthusiasm than you had with this guy. I've been on Batch for 18 months and this experience with the woman I mentioned is the only one I met more than twice outside of a mutual friendzone, out of 6 women I have met.
This cat is prettier than I'll ever be. ?
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 15, 2019:
Ah, Persians are so cute to me, even when they have scrunched up faces.....
This is when i ask my daughter to do anything
TomMcGiverin comments on Mar 15, 2019:
Poor whiny kitty is so overworked with just having to look cute all the time....

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Agnostic, Atheist, Humanist, Secularist, Freethinker, Spiritual
Open to meeting women
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