According to one of my friends, I’m going to the Christian Hell just because I’m Pro-LGBT.

Budgie comments on Jul 15, 2021:

When some bible thumper in the street came up to me to ask if I believed in god and I told him of course not and refused to engage with him further he said if I didn't accept god into my heart I would burn in the fires of hell. I told him if he didn't get out of my face I would call the police. He...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 15, 2021:

You handled it really well and by the book.

According to one of my friends, I’m going to the Christian Hell just because I’m Pro-LGBT.

SnowyOwl comments on Jul 15, 2021:

I've been threatened with guns, knives, baseball bats and fisticuffs, all of them were more real than hell.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 15, 2021:

It's a longer story than I am willing to even try to share here, but on Mon. I got threatened by another senior citizen around my age with "How about we go outside and I kick your ass?" in front of a full room of people during lunch at my local senior center. It arose out of a conversation I started in the hallway on the way in with one of his Trumper buddies and he was making his threat as a way of bringing the conflict to a head. The pity of it is, that the county organization that funds and oversees the center is probably not going to do anything about the public threat of assault that he shouted at me except talk to him and scold him about it. I got on the phone today with one of the bosses of the county organization and told him in no uncertain terms, that I could have gone to the local cops on Mon. after he threatened me, as I had plenty of witnesses, including staff, but I didn't want to put them in the middle of it with the cops. But I told him that if they go light on the guy that threatened me, and he then does it again, I will go to the cops, file a police report, and go after him for assault charges, and then they WILL be in the middle of it. And if it comes to that, and they try to kick me out or suspend me from the center for standing up for myself and going to the cops for a second threat, I will then go to the ACLU and sue their ass, if they would take my case.

According to one of my friends, I’m going to the Christian Hell just because I’m Pro-LGBT.

Deb57 comments on Jul 15, 2021:

I live in a very Jesus-y rural area. I have been threatened with hell for all kinds of reasons.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 15, 2021:

I feel for you..

These days I mostly just want someone to talk to.

Zster comments on Jul 14, 2021:

My cats and plants might appreciate me finding another human to talk with, now and then! Feel free to drop me a question or topic via messaging, here.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 15, 2021:

You can always talk to me as well...

The Young Turks - Ben Carson: Black Families Better Under Slavery [youtube.com]

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 15, 2021:

I'm sure most of his white friends think most other people would be better under serfdom as well.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 15, 2021:

No doubt. But nowadays, formalized serfdom would lead to periodic revolutions, so the ruling class prefers to stick with our informal form of capitalist serfdom, made of with low wages, no job security, plenty of debt to keep the serfs in line, and the cops to ride herd on the uppity serfs.

let's just call the reasoning payback

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 14, 2021:

I like to say to those who say "it's history, " "Well, ok, then let's put up statues of Sherman all through Georgia because it's history."

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 15, 2021:

@Beowulfsfriend You can't fix stupid or crazy....

let's just call the reasoning payback

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 14, 2021:

I like to say to those who say "it's history, " "Well, ok, then let's put up statues of Sherman all through Georgia because it's history."

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 15, 2021:

@Beowulfsfriend Maybe.

An excellent point

TomMcGiverin comments on Jul 14, 2021:

I have a couple friends who are way different than me on politics, and the only way we can get along is if we leave that topic off limits. One of them is a Libertarian, the other is a very centrist Dem who keeps refusing to recognize the faults and corruption of the Dem Party. But both of them agree...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 15, 2021:

@mischl I have no doubt that is the biggest difference. A system that allows legalized bribery between the pols, the oligarchs, and corporations ensures that the pols will only be responsive to those donors, not the peasants who vote for them. The pols only need to pretend to care about the peasants every four or two years before elections, and with the help of the corporate media, the voters remain conned into thinking they matter to the pols.

let's just call the reasoning payback

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 14, 2021:

I like to say to those who say "it's history, " "Well, ok, then let's put up statues of Sherman all through Georgia because it's history."

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 15, 2021:

A statue of Sherman in Georgia might last one day before being completely destroyed..

The Young Turks - Ben Carson: Black Families Better Under Slavery [youtube.com]

JonnaBononna comments on Jul 15, 2021:

What a fucking lunatic he is.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 15, 2021:

@phxbillcee He belongs on the rice box, same as the other Uncle Ben...

An excellent point

TomMcGiverin comments on Jul 14, 2021:

I have a couple friends who are way different than me on politics, and the only way we can get along is if we leave that topic off limits. One of them is a Libertarian, the other is a very centrist Dem who keeps refusing to recognize the faults and corruption of the Dem Party. But both of them agree...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 15, 2021:

@mischl I am guessing there are two reasons for that. One, is that Germany's parlimentary system, like most governments in Europe, has much greater allowances for third parties and other minor parties to hold power compared to the US federal government system which mostly shuts out third parties. Secondly, Germany's mass media is probably less corporate controlled, or at least has more diversity and balance in coverage of politics than the US corporate owned media which uses either blackouts of coverage or bias and slander against any opponents of the two major parties. And is it also possible that Germany provides real, competitive public financing for national elections to minor party candidates who qualify for it? And are there possibly any effective limits on campaign financing for the major parties in Germany, unlike the legalized bribery practiced in the US for federal elections.?

An excellent point

TomMcGiverin comments on Jul 14, 2021:

I have a couple friends who are way different than me on politics, and the only way we can get along is if we leave that topic off limits. One of them is a Libertarian, the other is a very centrist Dem who keeps refusing to recognize the faults and corruption of the Dem Party. But both of them agree...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 14, 2021:

@mischl I am with your more learned friends, as you say, because even tho I think a third party could possibly fix most of our problems, too many people are and will continue to be brainwashed by our corporate media, and that will not allow a third party to beat the two major parties in DC. And even if a third party could, somehow, win power and control of our government in DC thru elections, our ruling class, together with their military and cops, would never allow that government to take control. It would end up something like Chile in 1973. They would declare martial law and do a crackdown on anyone against the status quo. So, in the final analysis, I think revolution will be necessary, and the ruling class will make sure that it has to be violent. And like you, I have never had a political party on the national level that truly represented my views and had any chance or success in my lifetime of electing someone president or to congress. The Green Party is about as close as any has come in my lifetime.

These days I mostly just want someone to talk to.

Charles1971 comments on Jul 14, 2021:

I know how you feel. I live alone and work from home. My primary human contact is when I go out for groceries and to run errands. I'm introverted but it would be nice to have someone to talk to besides inanimate objects.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 14, 2021:

Your situation is pretty much what mine was for 14 months with Covid. I am so glad to be out and socializing so much more these last couple months, and yet at the same time it is sort of stressful and a big adjustment to get used to.

An excellent point

TomMcGiverin comments on Jul 14, 2021:

I have a couple friends who are way different than me on politics, and the only way we can get along is if we leave that topic off limits. One of them is a Libertarian, the other is a very centrist Dem who keeps refusing to recognize the faults and corruption of the Dem Party. But both of them agree...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 14, 2021:

@mischl I am not always on the side of the ACLU, and I consider the Dem Party as equally corrupt and against the interests of peasants like us as the Repubs. But at least the Dem Party is not openly hostile towards minorities and women, and is also in favor of multiculturalism, but not much more. I hate their being so focused on identity politics and only marginally in favor of any reform regarding war and economics. But I agree with your points. The Repubs are now openly promoting fascism, while the Dems, cowardly as they are, are appearing to put up some opposition to it. I have little faith in them on it, however, as they are owned and serve the same donors as the Repubs, and that ruling class would be fine with fascism, as long as it favored them and the country stayed stable and peaceful enough for them to not have to leave and could continue to make their profits with their businesses.

This is the height of insanity at the hands of the GOP

Sticks48 comments on Jul 14, 2021:

I can hear the dueling banjos in the background.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 14, 2021:

Right on, Larry. That banjo music just makes my skin crawl and scares the bejeezus out of me..

Dating in Arizona: Here's a quote from a woman's profile: "No I haven't gotten.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jul 13, 2021:

I think the profile proves the woman is nuts and someone to take a hard pass on, unless you enjoy crazy with sex and think she's hot enough looking to take the risk for some casual sex. Your call.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 13, 2021:

@lerlo A wise decision, neither do I. I never knowingly date crazy or stupid, the sex is not worth it.

Fauci Says ‘It's Horrifying’ to See CPAC Crowd Cheering Low Vaccination Rates

Sticks48 comments on Jul 12, 2021:

Hopefully this problem will take care of itself, if you get my drift.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 12, 2021:

If only....

Been called that by a few here , I'm proud of it

Pralina1 comments on Jul 12, 2021:

I ll say

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 12, 2021:

Exactly! They can all fuck off and die, as far as I'm concerned.

Fauci Says ‘It's Horrifying’ to See CPAC Crowd Cheering Low Vaccination Rates

TomMcGiverin comments on Jul 12, 2021:

I wish Covid would wipe out a lot of these assholes, if only it didn't hurt other innocent people in the process...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 12, 2021:

@bobwjr So in other words, they are being typical Repub hypocrites....

Gallup agrees with Pew.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jul 11, 2021:

Marx said it long ago, "Religion is the opiate of the masses", and in this case, esp. so for the poorer masses....

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 12, 2021:

@skado I see, that makes sense. I like the original quote even better than the one I posted. It makes me think of MLK's quote about riots being the language of the unheard and oppressed....

Big tip you are wrong

JonnaBononna comments on Jul 11, 2021:

I really really hope that businesses and events will start requiring vaccines for entrance. At the very least concerts and sporting events should.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 11, 2021:

True, but in red states like mine, the governor has already ordered that such requirements are illegal, even schools requiring vaxing for kids 12 and over. I wouldn't count on those requirements being allowed in your state, which is pretty much red in most ways.

Gallup agrees with Pew.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jul 11, 2021:

Marx said it long ago, "Religion is the opiate of the masses", and in this case, esp. so for the poorer masses....

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 11, 2021:

@skado I guess I stand corrected on the wording, thanks.

And When I Die.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jul 10, 2021:

This is one of my classic rock/soul tunes that I sing at karaoke, that always seems to go over big with crowds, even here in the Bible Belt of Iowa.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 11, 2021:

@David1955 Moving to get a better dating pool is easier to say than to do. Esp. when your local friends are your whole support system and you have no family to lean on for emotional support. I am stuck here.

And When I Die.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jul 10, 2021:

This is one of my classic rock/soul tunes that I sing at karaoke, that always seems to go over big with crowds, even here in the Bible Belt of Iowa.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 11, 2021:

@David1955 I used to attend a Meetup.com group for divorced and other single people like me (widowed), and I made the mistake of being honest about this last point when the group was discussing dating site profiles. I mentioned that I was Agnostic, unlike the rest of the group who pretty much all belonged to a Christian Singles Group as well on Meetup, and that I didn't list myself as Agnostic in my profile. I told them that I use the other label I mentioned above. Then one of the women in the group (it was almost all divorced women in the group and there was lots of misandry there, which the female leader of the group did nothing to discourage or confront. It was clear that men were merely to be tolerated in the group) asked me why I didn't list myself as Agnostic in my profile. I flatly told her that in my experience, most people in Iowa were too ignorant or prejudiced to understand and be open-minded about it. She then told me that she was very personally offended by that, and the rest of the women jumped in and bashed me on that. A couple months later, after some more friction, during which the group leader never stood up for me against the obvious misandry and general resentment towards males going on, the leader booted me out of the group by removing or blocking me from the group on Meetup. She was merely protecting her bread and butter, I suppose, since she had a business as a dating and relationship coach and was using the Meetup group to provide her clients and she also charged people for attending her monthly workshop sessions where she presented boilerplate obvious stuff about relationships and dating.

And When I Die.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jul 10, 2021:

This is one of my classic rock/soul tunes that I sing at karaoke, that always seems to go over big with crowds, even here in the Bible Belt of Iowa.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 11, 2021:

@David1955 I know this sounds smug and elitist, but most people in Iowa, where I live, are not smart or educated enough to get any kind of nuance or irony in things. Which is one reason on my dating profile on Batch, I don't list as Agnostic, since most people are too ignorant or prejudiced to get or understand what it means, and my compatible slice of the local dating pool is small enough, that I simply use the category of Spiritual, But Not Religious, even tho I know it's a cop-out.

South Dakota and Vermont have a lot in common.

Sticks48 comments on Jul 10, 2021:

Having spent time in both states l can honestly say it is about education and ignorance. It is not complicated.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 10, 2021:

I suspect that is why people in Vermont elect people like Bernie, because they are not as brainwashed with religion and also are smart enough to understand basic economics and support policies that actually are in their own best interests, instead of voting for the interests of people way richer than them or hoping for a pie in the sky reward after death for being an obedient peasant.

First thing, let's establish I am NOT a genius.

mischl comments on Jul 8, 2021:

Long long ago I gave up trying to "convince" anybody about the non-existence of deities. I found it to be actually counter productive. Because they try to convince me of their beliefs. Instead, I never initiate those kind of conversations. And if necessary, I respond with the lowest-key, fewest ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 8, 2021:

They sure are in Iowa...

First thing, let's establish I am NOT a genius.

xenoview comments on Jul 8, 2021:

Good luck in finding people in your area.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 8, 2021:

@xenoview Figures, and I get your point. My point is, that for me and the OP, the pickings are slim on that front, because of where we live compared to you.

First thing, let's establish I am NOT a genius.

xenoview comments on Jul 8, 2021:

Good luck in finding people in your area.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 8, 2021:

Sheesh, Timothy, you've got it really good compared to me and the OP, at least as far as dating options. There appear to be several attractive, interesting women from Agnostic living in your area, which is more than I can say for me or the OP. I didn't check on whether they are still active on this site, but my guess is most of them aren't. If so, too bad... Yup, most of them have been on here in the last month or so..

I know this is a contentious subject matter but I came across this picture on the web.

mischl comments on Jul 8, 2021:

My translation: If you're not wearing a mask because you think god will protect you, then you are stupid as a fucking rock. Stay away from me.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 8, 2021:

I too have an aversion to stupid people. I am only happy when they and I stay far apart.

I’m here to find my soul mate

TomMcGiverin comments on Jun 9, 2021:

Good luck on that one, Sparky. Esp. since you say "Only God can give you peace of mind" and this is a site for non-believers, lol. I predict a short stay here for you...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 7, 2021:

@Jennifer112 Have to pass on that, first, because you look young enough to be my granddaughter, lol, and secondly, because I suspect your phone number is part of a scam to charge me for a toll call. But if I'm wrong about the latter part, then I'm sure you and our more tech literate members will correct me.

Good thought

azzow2 comments on Jul 6, 2021:

He sure was a great Republican.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 6, 2021:

But nowadays, the party would crucify him or John Lindsay for being on the side of underdogs and for equality or fairness for all.

This has been a lingering thought for quite some time, and it is now being presented here.

dalefvictor comments on Jul 4, 2021:

I listened to a Podcast where the discussion was about the current manner of telling what sex, gender on is. Before this I thought I was a man who had been raised by a caring Mother and who had learned to cook, sew, clean, and do other chores. Now I have no idea what the hell I am. The good thing is...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 4, 2021:

I think you sound like a well-rounded person with good life skills, nothing wrong with any of that.

Searching for the right one is not easy I'm 34 I'm single never married before anyone comes up here ...

twill comments on Jul 4, 2021:

I got married @ 31 ....what a HUGE FUCKING MISTAKE that was. The Devil's Spawn and then to find out that Satan is a SHE, and is the county judge. DUDE ! They whacked me for about 8 years of my life. Tag Teamed. OKAY...I admit, this is all wrong of me to put BeezleBub into the same company as ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 4, 2021:

I agree that single is better than that situation and I'll gladly take your word for it on how bad it was. You sound like a Sam Kinison fan...

Hi—I’ve been close to AWOL for a few months while I focused on rekindling a relationship.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jun 28, 2021:

Yeah, but dogs and cats are much more loyal and reliable than most humans are in romantic relationships, so better to rely on pets.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 4, 2021:

@UUNJ Point well taken...

Searching for the right one is not easy I'm 34 I'm single never married before anyone comes up here ...

Tejas comments on Jul 4, 2021:

You have to forgive most of the people on here, age seems to make people bitter.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 4, 2021:

I mostly agree with you, that this site is mostly older folks and that many of them are bitter, but I don't think that is the reason people are being negative towards the OP's post.

Searching for the right one is not easy I'm 34 I'm single never married before anyone comes up here ...

Paracosm comments on Jul 3, 2021:

It's especially difficult when you open with giant red flags. Good luck in your search.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 4, 2021:

@Joker87 It's not a dating site, man. And as far as I know, it hasn't been for a few years now. It was originally intended to be one, but that didn't work out. And as far as I know, the site's creator quit all advertising for the site at least a year or more ago. So I don't know where you are getting your ideas about advertising saying this is a dating site, etc. I am not being rude, just giving you the truth. I have been on here since the end of 2016, unlike you. And, BTW, my life is not miserable, and it's rude of you to assume that about others just because they disagree with you and don't tell you what you want to hear. Project much?......

Sounds like something I would do

Paracosm comments on Jul 2, 2021:

Cool story but I wish managers would just start kicking the rude customers out.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 3, 2021:

I agree, but they never will, unless the customer assaults or threatens assault on someone. Unfortunately, peon employees are supposed to take all kinds of abuse because the customer is always right, allegedly, and the managers don't want to risk being badmouthed to the public by a customer. Too bad business owners, managers, and corporate America don't realize that some customers ARE worth losing.... My guess is that managers will never kick a customer out for bad behavior unless they direct it towards the manager themself, or another customer, then they might give them the boot.

Stole this from a friend.

itsmedammit comments on Jul 3, 2021:

Addiction is complicated and dealing with an addict is so exhausting. I've had to deal with a few in my life, along with some who also suffered other mental illness. Difficult to watch ones life being given over to the control of some substance. Quite crazy really. But of course there is ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 3, 2021:

I think a recent movie said it well, "You can only save yourself, you can't save someone else on your own (from addiction), and even then, they have to want to save themselves.".

I'm 34 single never married don't have children and I'm looking for a woman that will accept me for ...

Cyklone comments on Jul 1, 2021:

Despite the advertising, this is not a dating site. The only woman on here who does date gives us all a detailed analysis afterwards, but go for it, we all need more laughs 🤣🤣🤣

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 2, 2021:

In truth, there are probably more women from here that date than just her, and I have a good idea who you're referring to, but she is the only one who always posts a detailed analysis of her dates afterwards. But your point is well taken.

A major burn , tough

silverotter11 comments on Jul 1, 2021:

Is melania always scowling or do the photographers only shooting her when she scowls? I don't remember many photos of her where she looks happy.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jul 1, 2021:

I can't imagine any mentally healthy woman with an IQ above room temp that would be happy about being married to Trump, but then, I could be wrong about Melania...

Fundie Family Member: If you are an atheist you will burn in hell for all eternity.

HelenRoseBuck comments on Jun 30, 2021:

Funny but sad that there are so many willingly being duped into a life of waiting to die. They will, of course, die. But what awaits them when they die? The final scene in the Sopranos series is what I assume happens when one dies. Nothing. It’s a blank screen and you aren’t even conscious ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 30, 2021:

That's exactly what my father, a lifelong Catholic, experienced when he cardiac-arrested for a couple minutes many years ago. He said it was just all black. After that, he continued to attend church sometimes, but admitted that he no longer believed in any afterlife.

Somewhere South of France - YouTube

Barnie2years comments on Jun 27, 2021:

Ike give her a hug! I’d give you a hug! I only have my dog to hug.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 29, 2021:

@TheoryNumber3 When cats put their two paws around your finger or lick your nose, that's the same as a hug, from cats.

I met someone on Match a month ago We have started spending weekends together and sometimes see ...

sassygirl3869 comments on Jun 9, 2021:

The great romance that was a platonic friendship. Ended in March of 2021 due to Bob's parkinsons disease pushing me away. Met Larry on Plenty of Fish in May 2021 - going slow despite flowers and champagne. ~~~~

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 29, 2021:

I think it's always best at our age to go slow on new relationships. I think most of us aren't as resilient with loss or disappointment as we were when we were younger.

Structural engineer warned of problems before the collapse

TomMcGiverin comments on Jun 27, 2021:

One reason I live in a three story building in a state where earthquakes are unknown.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 28, 2021:

@NoMagicCookie That sounds like a very scary nightmare to live with, the fear that it might occur again.

Structural engineer warned of problems before the collapse

TomMcGiverin comments on Jun 27, 2021:

One reason I live in a three story building in a state where earthquakes are unknown.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 27, 2021:

@NoMagicCookie Same here, tornadoes and floods are the only things to worry about here, as far as natural disasters. Since I live far away from any rivers, I only have to worry about tornadoes.

Please let it be on the tile..,...

glennlab comments on Jun 26, 2021:

your slippers and you know it

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 27, 2021:

@MichelleGar1 Such polite kitties...

Structural engineer warned of problems before the collapse

JonnaBononna comments on Jun 26, 2021:

Similar to the construction collapse of the Hard Rock Hotel in New Orleans in October 2019- it was reported by several workers that it seemed to be sagging, but things went on until it collapsed. There were three workers killed, and two of the bodies remained in the structure for ten months, until ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 27, 2021:

Gotta love American capitalism. Profit and money over people and human lives every time. Some people just need to learn to get with the program. (sarcasm ended)...

What are your dealbreakers?

Apunzelle comments on Jun 25, 2021:

All the above … plus racist, boring, or bald. I’m trying to work on changing the last one but haven’t succeeded yet.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 25, 2021:

@Sgt_Spanky Tell me about it. I noticed a long time ago how much less attraction women who just met me seemed to have once I got older, became bald, and no longer had an athletic body. It goes both ways.

What are your dealbreakers?

lerlo comments on Jun 25, 2021:

God, guns, motorcycles, trump, and cats

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 25, 2021:

@lerlo I think what you say is true with many women, but certainly not all. So yes, there is a lot of false modesty and dishonesty from some women about whether they want to hear compliments about their looks before they get to know the guy more. So, I have learned since the example I cited for you in my experience and I treat all women the same in online dating since then. I know my place in the pecking order and the game of online dating as an average looking man and simply don't comment on a woman's looks until either she brings it up in messaging or until I have already jumped thru all the hoops and passed all the tests of earning the right to finally meet her in person, at which time I tell her her she looks nice or great and compliment her appropriately on her outfit. As you say, doing anything else as an average looking man, interacting with an average or above average looking woman, will only be held against you if it comes before the in person meeting and will only aid your better looking competition.

What are your dealbreakers?

lerlo comments on Jun 25, 2021:

God, guns, motorcycles, trump, and cats

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 25, 2021:

@lerlo I am aware of that. Dealing with women in online dating does often involve navigating a narrow and ambiguous line of communication, often even having to speak in code about your intentions and your impressions of them. I have been, for example, blown off by a woman simply for mentioning how nice her lips looked in her photos and how much I enjoy kissing. She felt that was inappropriate for a first message, but she likely would have rejected me anyway for not being on her level of looks. She breadcrumbed me by replying to my messages with long gaps, but never giving me a straight answer on whether she was interested in getting to know me or not, making excuses for why she was taking so long to reply, etc. Just another example of a good looking woman knowing her value in the dating game and using it to play games with a man who is interested in dating her.

What are your dealbreakers?

TomMcGiverin comments on Jun 25, 2021:

This topic has been posted before, I really have nothing to add to what has been listed or repeat my previously posted list except, someone who loves country music and has no intellect or is anti-intellectual.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 25, 2021:

@Sgt_Spanky I was not being critical of you bringing up an old topic, but you are entitled to your sarcastic response. I was not trying to provoke that.

What are your dealbreakers?

lerlo comments on Jun 25, 2021:

God, guns, motorcycles, trump, and cats

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 25, 2021:

@lerlo Quite understandable and appropriate for you to avoid cat lovers and their cats. I run into the same sort of problem with most women in my local dating pool, as I have allergies, as do you, only mine are to outdoor seasonal pollens. Most women in my dating pool are outdoors people that will not date a man who won't join them outdoors most of the time in the warmer months of the year, so I lose out on dating any of them.

What are your dealbreakers?

deepeddy comments on Jun 25, 2021:

Do people have different deal breakers for Mr/Ms Right than they do for Mr/Ms Right Now? I have a long list for someone who I’d expect to spend my life with but coming out of a 25 year relationship, the standards are different for someone to re-explore the single world with.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 25, 2021:

I agree. When we are newly single, most of us, and probably men more than women, are not as choosy about who we date compared to those who have been on their own a long time.

What are your dealbreakers?

lerlo comments on Jun 25, 2021:

God, guns, motorcycles, trump, and cats

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 25, 2021:

Wait a second, I resemble the last part of your remark. I love cats and have found that most cat lovers are good people.

What are your dealbreakers?

Apunzelle comments on Jun 25, 2021:

All the above … plus racist, boring, or bald. I’m trying to work on changing the last one but haven’t succeeded yet.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 25, 2021:

At least you admit it about not wanting to date bald men. I think about 40% or more of women share your attitude, which is fine with me, we all have our preferences about appearance and looks. It also pisses me off that Match got rid of listing a member's preferences of what they were looking for in a dating partner. In the past you could see on a profile what they were looking for in race, hair color, including baldness, income level, whether they had kids, etc. Now you just have to guess what their preferences are and waste your time messaging people who already know they aren't interested in you. I guess dating sites thought all that preference stuff was too non-PC or maybe they got rid of it because it was too much work for their IT staff to deal with it. I notice you are way younger than me. By the time you get to my age, over half the men in your dating pool at that age will be bald, so keep working on your attitude, lol. Because, trust me, most of the men in that age range will also mostly be unwilling to date someone their age or a woman who is at all overweight. Unlike most men in my age group, I don't mind dating women my age, as well as women several years older or younger than me, as well as women who are somewhat overweight. It gets pretty brutal for women and men at the older ages in the dating game.

Love to spend time by myself letting my mind paint the pictures and making up the voices

SnowyOwl comments on Jun 24, 2021:

I think that the late, great Bill Hicks put it very succinctly - when we as a people stop reading and just turn on the Tube - we give up so much of what life is worth living for. We give up imagination, we give up freedom of thought and opinion, we give up critical thinking and appreciation of how ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 24, 2021:

Makes sense to me. I also enjoy reading because it helps me focus and center myself, same as meditation works for other people, while for me meditation is boring and makes me sleepy. Along with the dated pastime of reading, I also refuse to buy a smartphone and fall into the seduction of younger folks, along with some Boomers like myself, of wanting to be connected all waking hours to social media and the outside world. I prefer instead, to be consciously choosing what I listen to and who I attend to in connecting with others. For the life of me, I still can't understand those who bring a smartphone to a meeting with someone at a restaurant or coffee shop, or getting together to sing karaoke, all because they either get bored with actual face to face conversation or are afraid to miss out on something more interesting even after they have supposedly committed their time and presence to those they are meeting. I choose to live a life where those I choose as friends and who choose me show up for engagements and commit to attending to and listening to me and vice verso. If that isn't good enough for them, then we shouldn't be friends and getting together isn't worth it for them or me. Cellphones are fine for emergencies like when the car breaks down or when you're away from home and need to make a call, or when you're running late or checking on why someone else is running late, but beyond that, I don't see a purpose, except to act like you're more important than those you're with or to selfishly seek to not miss out on something better than your present company. So I use a simple tracphone when I am away from home or in my car, and it meets my needs just fine. If I want to connect to the internet, it can always wait until I get home and use my laptop. If I need directions somewhere, I can look it up and write it out from home before I go. If I need them after I leave home, I can ask someone how to get somewhere in that town. People survived just fine doing these things before smartphones, but what hasn't survived is face to face conversation and emotional connection between people. Same with attention span.

I spent 32 years learning the lesson

TomMcGiverin comments on Jun 24, 2021:

That's a long time to waste on someone, about a half or a third of a lifetime.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 24, 2021:

@glennlab In that case, I guess it might have been worth it.

I spent 32 years learning the lesson

TomMcGiverin comments on Jun 24, 2021:

That's a long time to waste on someone, about a half or a third of a lifetime.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 24, 2021:

@glennlab I get it, but life is short enough as it is to spend that much time on one lesson with one person.

He who feeds a hungry animal ...

Vipyr82 comments on Jun 23, 2021:

My cat is constantly hungry no matter how many times I feed him. Doesn’t matter if it’s the food from my dinner or the kibble from the dog bowl he nonchalantly steals.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 23, 2021:

A case of feline eating disorder, lol?

"None of these things are happening in any other developed nation.

WayneDalton comments on Jun 22, 2021:

As far as I am concerned, they are complicit,and are responsible as well

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 23, 2021:

@rainmanjr That's a piss poor low bar to settle for. I refuse to do so.

We all want Trump to be held accountable for his multiple crimes and heinous violations against ...

mcgeo52 comments on Jun 22, 2021:

Moving on without holding criminals accountable sends a message that future criminal actions will not have consequences.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 23, 2021:

@mcgeo52 It figures...

"None of these things are happening in any other developed nation.

WayneDalton comments on Jun 22, 2021:

As far as I am concerned, they are complicit,and are responsible as well

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 22, 2021:

I agree. On the things that affect centers of power, as Chris Hedges puts it, like war, taxes, corporate power, etc., the Dems and Repubs are two wings of the same duopoly party, the party of the rich, corporations, and the war machine.

We all want Trump to be held accountable for his multiple crimes and heinous violations against ...

mcgeo52 comments on Jun 22, 2021:

Moving on without holding criminals accountable sends a message that future criminal actions will not have consequences.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 22, 2021:

Exactly! Obama letting Bush, Cheney, and the other war criminals off the hook set the precedent that allowed Trump to commit his crimes.

Seven justices - including two appointed by Donald Trump - rejected, for the third time, a ...

UrsiMajor comments on Jun 22, 2021:

I'm actually one of them. As a consultant, I change contracts a lot. It's easier just to buy my health insurance directly myself. Employment should not be a mandatory requirement for healthcare.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 22, 2021:

Agreed, We need to join the rest of the civilized world, make health care a right, and have single payer healthcare thru the government paying for it thru taxes.

How dare we be so radical.

19dacar52 comments on Jun 22, 2021:

Well, all those points are the first step toward socialism... and you know what comes next. 😏

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 22, 2021:

People openly having sex in the streets and scaring the horses?

Unfortunately not surprised

BufftonBeotch comments on Jun 17, 2021:

And yet making Juneteenth a Federal Holiday was nearly unanimous except for 14 outliers.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 21, 2021:

@BufftonBeotch I grasp the importance of symbolism, but in the long term it is no substitute for real change, such as equalizing power or wealth equality in a society. Continually substituting symbolism for real change or revolution leads to a society of boiled frogs, who don't revolt or jump out of the hot water that keeps getting hotter because symbolism gives them false hope and comfort that they aren't being gradually boiled alive by the system and the ruling class. Right now we have a nation of very cooked frogs who I call sheeple...

Tell me honestly. You've all thought this, right???

TomMcGiverin comments on May 16, 2021:

I must confess I identify a lot with this feeling. It often comes down to hoping their eccentricities match up well with mine.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 21, 2021:

@TheoryNumber3 Yup, setting the bar low is sometimes a good trick...at least if you're just interested in something short term...

Unfortunately not surprised

BufftonBeotch comments on Jun 17, 2021:

And yet making Juneteenth a Federal Holiday was nearly unanimous except for 14 outliers.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 18, 2021:

@BufftonBeotch I respectfully disagree. Symbolic things function as a distraction and substitute for real change, reform, and progress. They lull people into thinking we still have a functioning democracy, that our voices matter, and give false hope about whether the system and the two major parties, as it is, will allow real change. It pacifies the sheeple.

Melania was 'nowhere to be found' as Trump celebrated 75th birthday with family and friends | ...

K9Kohle789 comments on Jun 18, 2021:

She probably had her head stuck up her ass and everyone knows it's really really hard to correct that situation esp. if you have a big head.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 18, 2021:

Good one! That is usually the main malfunction with most people that are assholes. And their problem is usually easily seen by others, but never by them.

Tell me honestly. You've all thought this, right???

Surfpirate comments on May 16, 2021:

So many unique and interesting people in the world, the boring mud people are pretty easy to spot and avoid but you have to be willing to bend a little for the sort of people that are weird like you but not exactly the same sort of weird. I can't imagine how horrible it would be to have a ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 17, 2021:

@TheoryNumber3 Sounds a bit schizophrenic to me, like the old saying, "You're never alone with a schizophrenic"...

Tell me honestly. You've all thought this, right???

TomMcGiverin comments on May 16, 2021:

I must confess I identify a lot with this feeling. It often comes down to hoping their eccentricities match up well with mine.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 17, 2021:

@TheoryNumber3 I've gone thru dry spells where I began to feel the same way. The best, and funniest line on that issue, was one I saw a video clip of a woman saying it on the late nite reality dating show, Blind Date, which I think was on Bravo or We TV network. She said, "I just want to meet and date someone I don't want to kill at the end of the day".....

Unfortunately not surprised

BufftonBeotch comments on Jun 17, 2021:

And yet making Juneteenth a Federal Holiday was nearly unanimous except for 14 outliers.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 17, 2021:

I'm not saying that racial equality doesn't matter, but if passing a federal holiday of that type is all Biden and the Dems can come up with as a win or uniting the congressional Dems around a bill, then that's a pretty piss poor example of progress. Because it does nothing against the plutocracy or corporate rule of the country. It costs the rich and corporate America nothing to add another federal holiday. Identity politics at its worst, posing as real change or progress. And it sure as hell won't be enough to let the Dems win the congressional midterms in a year.

Covid: US death toll passes 600,000 as vaccination rate slows [bbc.com]

CuddyCruiser comments on Jun 17, 2021:

This will take more lives than the Spanish flu pandemic. When all this is said and done over the next year or two there will in all likelihood be over 1 million deaths or maybe more. I hope not, but I’m not hopeful about anything that isn’t in my control.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 17, 2021:

@CuddyCruiser I wish states like that would just secede.

Covid: US death toll passes 600,000 as vaccination rate slows [bbc.com]

CuddyCruiser comments on Jun 17, 2021:

This will take more lives than the Spanish flu pandemic. When all this is said and done over the next year or two there will in all likelihood be over 1 million deaths or maybe more. I hope not, but I’m not hopeful about anything that isn’t in my control.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 17, 2021:

@CuddyCruiser I hear you, and I live in a red state. The latest I heard, tho, is that Iowa is up to about 50 or 60% of adults vaxed. The case numbers are now so low that the state is shutting down its drive thru testing sites about a month from now.

Covid: US death toll passes 600,000 as vaccination rate slows [bbc.com]

CuddyCruiser comments on Jun 17, 2021:

This will take more lives than the Spanish flu pandemic. When all this is said and done over the next year or two there will in all likelihood be over 1 million deaths or maybe more. I hope not, but I’m not hopeful about anything that isn’t in my control.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 17, 2021:

@CuddyCruiser Then I really do hope you're wrong.

Covid: US death toll passes 600,000 as vaccination rate slows [bbc.com]

CuddyCruiser comments on Jun 17, 2021:

This will take more lives than the Spanish flu pandemic. When all this is said and done over the next year or two there will in all likelihood be over 1 million deaths or maybe more. I hope not, but I’m not hopeful about anything that isn’t in my control.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 17, 2021:

You have pretty much spelled out my thinking as well regarding hopefulness, esp. concerning things that involve systems of power, which, as you, I, and Chris Hedges know are presently beyond the control of peons like us, short of some kind of revolution to right the power imbalances. Just curious, are you predicting over 1 Mil deaths in the US, or worldwide?

Covid: US death toll passes 600,000 as vaccination rate slows [bbc.com]

bobwjr comments on Jun 16, 2021:

Most cases now are in the unvaccinated

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 16, 2021:

Good, as long as the vaccinated are protected against these idiots, I say let them get sick and die. My only fear is if they produce variants that I am not protected against with my current vaccination or my future vaccinations.

What 'evidence of vaccination(s)' "nudges" do you favor ? Why/not ?

Deb57 comments on Jun 15, 2021:

I can recall a time when my sons would have been suspended from attending classes in their public elementary schools until they had their inoculations updated. It seems absurd to me right now that people are viewing their ability to infect others with the diseases du jour as some kind of "right."

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 15, 2021:

It is absurd to most of us, but not to conservatives and Libertarians, because, to them, their is no "us" or society, just their own individual selfishness, that matters. They have an alien mindset, as far as I'm concerned, and they are best avoided at the interpersonal level and fought ferociously at the ballot box and in the courts.

What we all know.

HippieChick58 comments on Jun 12, 2021:

Are you sure you mean midwest? That looks pretty southern to me.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 14, 2021:

@CuddyCruiser I live in the Midwest, and they both are Trump country, with the exception of Illinois and maybe Minnesota, but the South is probably more extreme in their Trump worship.

A sticker I would put on my car

Redheadedgammy comments on Jun 14, 2021:

I could probably get away with that here in California without getting my car keyed! 😉

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 14, 2021:

I know that in Iowa, esp. the city I live in, that sticker would be like a "Kick Me" sign. I don't need or want to spend the money on constant vandalism to my car.

A wise man

HippieChick58 comments on Jun 14, 2021:

That is so very true! I know some conservatives just like that.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 14, 2021:

Ditto. I won't waste my time or energy on them.

There is no christian persecution.

Matias comments on Jun 14, 2021:

Sociologists Campbell and Manning diagnosed a "culture of victimhood." It pays to present oneself as a victim. Of course, no one wants to be a real victim, but more and more people want to be perceived that way, because as a victim you have the moral authority.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 14, 2021:

I think that Repubs, as well as conservative Christians, like to claim victimhood.

So, I'm used to some indecent proposals on pof, but today I was offered a "sugar daddy who will ...

Deb57 comments on Jun 11, 2021:

When I was young and cute I once had a married man with an oil fortune offer to "keep" me - in exchange for sex, I'm sure, although that wasn't mentioned. I was a young, poor single mom, and it I won't pretend it wasn't tempting when I was looking at a lifetime of drudgery doing menial work. But I ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 11, 2021:

@Deb57 Don't mention it. I can relate to the experience of being stuck in an endless series of menial jobs, despite my privilege, for a few different reasons in my case. But one of them was that I was never willing to play office politics, kiss up to superiors, or backstab anyone to get ahead. And those things in themselves usually condemn a worker in America to never moving up from menial or dead end jobs. Working hard and following the rules at work, even together, is never enough to get ahead or advance in most workplaces, at least not in my experience.

So, I'm used to some indecent proposals on pof, but today I was offered a "sugar daddy who will ...

racocn8 comments on Jun 11, 2021:

Everyone is a whore. People really need to get over themselves.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 11, 2021:

@UrsiMajor I agree with you on the last sentence. If I really wanted to go on a trip and had no girlfriend to take with me, I would gladly pay the way for a friend, male or female, to go with me if they didn't have the money to pay. But I would not date someone where I had to continually pay for them to afford traveling with me or going to an expensive show or concert. The latter is what I call having to constantly "level up" with someone that is a lot poorer than me. That last sentence would clearly be a transaction of sex and companionship for money.

So, I'm used to some indecent proposals on pof, but today I was offered a "sugar daddy who will ...

racocn8 comments on Jun 11, 2021:

Everyone is a whore. People really need to get over themselves.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 11, 2021:

@UrsiMajor Then I can see why a lot of women would be tempted...Maybe he would pay airfare or limo service for you to visit him, lol....

So, I'm used to some indecent proposals on pof, but today I was offered a "sugar daddy who will ...

Tejas comments on Jun 11, 2021:

Some people would kill for the chance.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 11, 2021:

I have no doubt of that. And I also am well aware that I have mostly lived a life with enough privilege that it was certainly easier for me to practice integrity than it would have been otherwise or than it is for most people who are born poor or aren't able to get a higher education.

So, I'm used to some indecent proposals on pof, but today I was offered a "sugar daddy who will ...

racocn8 comments on Jun 11, 2021:

Everyone is a whore. People really need to get over themselves.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 11, 2021:

I'm not, at least by yours or most people's standards. But what others choose to do is not my business and does not bother me, at least if they are not part of my life. If someone chooses to "be a whore", as you say, they will not be my friend or be part of my life, as I choose only to be involved with people who have integrity. If they don't, I can't respect them enough to be friends with them.

So, I'm used to some indecent proposals on pof, but today I was offered a "sugar daddy who will ...

Deb57 comments on Jun 11, 2021:

When I was young and cute I once had a married man with an oil fortune offer to "keep" me - in exchange for sex, I'm sure, although that wasn't mentioned. I was a young, poor single mom, and it I won't pretend it wasn't tempting when I was looking at a lifetime of drudgery doing menial work. But I ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 11, 2021:

I admire your decision, Deb, and it doesn't surprise me at all. You have beauty on the inside and the outside, along with integrity. Which is why if you lived near me, I would date you in a heartbeat.

So, I'm used to some indecent proposals on pof, but today I was offered a "sugar daddy who will ...

FearlessFly comments on Jun 11, 2021:

I like to think of myself as a feminist. I want an EQUAL partner.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 11, 2021:

@UrsiMajor Melania and Trump are a transaction, as far as I'm concerned. Most healthy couples in a romantic or life relationship are partners, as far as I'm concerned.

So, I'm used to some indecent proposals on pof, but today I was offered a "sugar daddy who will ...

FearlessFly comments on Jun 11, 2021:

I like to think of myself as a feminist. I want an EQUAL partner.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 11, 2021:

I think of myself as a pro-feminist male, and I too want an equal partner in all things. Because I had one in my one marriage, which was my only LTR. I am not willing to settle for less than that in my next LTR, if I get one.

Online dating profile.

HippieChick58 comments on Jun 7, 2021:

There are men like this, and that's just part of the reason I'm not on any dating sites. I don't think I ever will be again, however... I have been wrong before. But... I live in Nebraska and I am such a fish out of water here. The average Nebraska 60ish male is conservative, xian, gun loving, and ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 8, 2021:

@HippieChick58 Glad you enjoy it. Those discussions wouldn't interest me, but they do interest my friend.

The real reason for some of our problems

Gator comments on Jun 8, 2021:

Illegal immigration is a very real problem. I live in Texas and it's very obvious that many of the people working in industries such as restaurants, landscaping, and construction are not citizens. There is an underground railroad in which they use other legal social security numbers. They sleep 4-5 ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 8, 2021:

@Gator Thanks, I try to be accurate.

Online dating profile.

HippieChick58 comments on Jun 7, 2021:

There are men like this, and that's just part of the reason I'm not on any dating sites. I don't think I ever will be again, however... I have been wrong before. But... I live in Nebraska and I am such a fish out of water here. The average Nebraska 60ish male is conservative, xian, gun loving, and ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 8, 2021:

@HippieChick58 I am aware of them and a friend of mine attends them regularly, because, even tho he is happily married, he loves to socialize and discuss things with others, even if it's usually just a repeat of the same old same old. I am not inclined that way and also don't find most discussions of atheism, humanism, or religion very interesting at all. He also has confirmed that I would find few opportunities at the meetings of those groups to meet single women in my age group. So I will stick with Batch, for better or worse.

The real reason for some of our problems

Gator comments on Jun 8, 2021:

Illegal immigration is a very real problem. I live in Texas and it's very obvious that many of the people working in industries such as restaurants, landscaping, and construction are not citizens. There is an underground railroad in which they use other legal social security numbers. They sleep 4-5 ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 8, 2021:

As long as there are jobs here for immigrants to work at, documented or not, "legally" here or not, they will continue to come here. And they will continue to be hired here, to work for less money than citizens who are already here, because employers are greedy and exploitive. Our government supports those employers, not American workers who have been displaced from their jobs by immigrants, so nothing will change for the better with our jobs that are being given to immigrants over native citizens and the wages for those jobs continue to stay low or even drop lower. It's a gradual turn towards restoring slavery thru the interim process of feudalism.

No! Jesus, save me please!

Leelu comments on Jun 7, 2021:

And "axe" for ask.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 7, 2021:

Wait a second, isn't that an acceptable spelling under Ebonics? Cue the PC Police coming to accuse you of being racist.....

Online dating profile.

HippieChick58 comments on Jun 7, 2021:

There are men like this, and that's just part of the reason I'm not on any dating sites. I don't think I ever will be again, however... I have been wrong before. But... I live in Nebraska and I am such a fish out of water here. The average Nebraska 60ish male is conservative, xian, gun loving, and ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 7, 2021:

So maybe you seem to be saying that Nebraska might be her "conservative state" she is wanting to move to, and that there are plenty of matches for her there? What a gruesome thought.....Sheesh, and I thought Iowa was the pits for dating, at least for folks like us....

Online dating profile.

RonWilliam53 comments on Jun 7, 2021:

"I am common sense" And looking for "suiters". Home schooled orphan? Sadly for her-she's looking for goobers who'll only post pictures of themselves in wife-beaters and holding the carp they caught for dinner.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 7, 2021:

She does sound pretty pathetic, at least by my standards...Maybe she will be found appealing by some members of the conservative Atheists group here, depending on if they can overlook her religious belief...

Online dating profile.

itsmedammit comments on Jun 7, 2021:

Well, they say there is someone for everyone.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 7, 2021:

Exactly my philosophy. I am sure she will find her match eventually, and they'll both get who they deserve. Like Angela and Dwight on The Office, there is always a match even for the most loathsome, toxic, dysfunctional people. I'm glad to steer clear of her type in my searching.

Does anybody say "bless you or God bless you" when someone sneezes? Personally I say gesundheit.

Gohan comments on Jun 6, 2021:

I don't say anything. It's a normal bodily function and doesn't require someone's well wishes.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jun 6, 2021:

I feel the same about farting. Why don't people say something after that, lol?