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Relatable...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 6, 2019:
## It brings a tear to my eye how short the life span is for a heated, padded toilet seat is. That and getting down on the bathroom floor to bolt those things down for the third time. It is one of the few times it is appropriate to say "shitt...."
You can reason but it goes over their heads, as does subtle humour.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 6, 2019:
## Just another excuse to use a common vulgarity.
GANCH.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 6, 2019:
## It's a word used when discussing misplaced oral sex. "Ganch: The stretch of skin between the anus and the testicles. See also 'chode' or 'grendela' --https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=ganch Now aren't you ashamed you brought it up?
mumpsimus noun adherence to or persistence in an erroneous use of language, memorization, ...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 6, 2019:
## Word of the week group strikes!
The untold story.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 6, 2019:
Reminds me of the ant eater on the ark: "What? You only brought two ants?"
The further adventures of our stable genius...aka "Meteorologist-in-Chief"
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 6, 2019:
## Donald knows weather. Now if he could figure out how to close an umbrella.
What to do with your last moments on earth:?
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 5, 2019:
>What to do with your last moments on earth:? Over charge my credit cards.
Well that's rude!
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 5, 2019:
## Stolen because Petunia likes to hear dirty jokes on the weekend.
Smile.... Friday's coming! :)
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 5, 2019:
## I love the first meme. Think it would work?
Former Trump supporter tells “Moscow Mitch” McConnell, “If you don’t like this nickname, do ...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 5, 2019:
## Consider Mitch also fights gun legislation, he could be called Mass Murder Mitch.
Good morning.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 5, 2019:
>Could anyone kindly explain it to me. That could be an epic book. I see it as an excuse to watch America's largest athletes get brain damaged. Demolition derby for big guys in tight uniforms patting each other's butts. Why women's wrestling isn't more popular instead baffles me.
He's at it again.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 5, 2019:
## Europeans buy the old style bulbs as "heating devices" because that's where most of the energy goes instead of making light. Somebody is using their E-Z Bake Oven.
The terrible graphed truth.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 5, 2019:
I like the one that says "What tips mean."
Remember these type ads?
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 5, 2019:
## When I was a teen and buggy whips were a thing, I see these types of ads broadcast on late night TV with the question of "do you know where your teenager is tonight?" Instead of being out living the wild life, I'd be sitting there watching TV and feeling shamed I wasn't worrying my parents instead. πŸ˜–πŸ˜«πŸ•Ί
FANDANGO.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 5, 2019:
## My home town, Pensacola, FL, is also called the city of five flags. It's because they've have five different countries rule the city. In their annual celebration they look for people who can dance the wild fandango. They never find them. πŸ˜•πŸ™β˜ΉοΈπŸ˜£πŸ˜–πŸ˜« As a result, I keep promising potential female traveling companions "Come away with me and we'll dance the wild fandango." That's never worked either.
It all makes sense now.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 5, 2019:
## I have grown to hate food containers sans lids.
Yes, but does she do windows, too?
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 5, 2019:
## It appears the grass has already been cut. My lawn mower doesn't stay shiny and clean once it has been used to cut grass. What is this, a lawn mower ad? Here the first sign of spring is shapely young woman on a ridding lawn mower. While she's jiggling all the way in her bikini, the stud muffins start wondering if they should offer to take her to Myrtle Beach. It's the nearest party, party beach in my area. I prefer secluded beaches on the California coast line to watch the sunset. It's more romantic.
I don't want to try those new flavors.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 5, 2019:
## It could be the name of the corporate name of family. In Germany, it's common to have the last name of Butt. Petunia's mother's maiden name was Betty Butts. Petunia claims Betty got married just for a name change. As unlikely as it sounds, once a year I go to Butts family reunion.
Ok.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## . . . and be a shining beacon in a land of hopeless ninnies.
Community Senate The literal meaning of the word "senate" is Assembly of Elders.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
>Bias, judgment, ignorance, self-righteousness, sexism, racism ## That's my boys! Granted you'll have that in any diverse group. Everybody wants other people to agree with them, which is why it's not uncommon to find the thread you've been followed has been deleted. Sometimes I get deleted from groups for amazingly stupid reasons or for no reason at all. It's Thursday, let's show the Warthog the door. It's social media. Don't take it seriously. I'm just here for fun. I remember Frank Zappa was critiqued for writing sexist songs. Frank said "Let 'em write their own songs." Sounds right to me.
Good News! The Adult Adventure is On!!!😈😈😈
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## You mean we get to discuss high risk investment plans, like penny stocks?
This isn't a meme but sadly its real .
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## Ya! Let's question the weather service where Alabama is.
First picture of the earth from space.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## We all live on the back of a turtle?
I get it!
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## In dog years, I'm dead. ☠️☠️🐢🐢
Keeping it positive.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## That's a rather idealistic list.
Why we can't have nice things
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## On American speedometers, there are both kilometers **and** miles. They can't look at the dial without figuring out which is shorter.
Well...I...um...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## Goofy is a dog. He owns a dog named Pluto. Dogs owning dogs? That's just wrong.
Good morning Girls and Boys!!!
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## Nuk, nuk, nuk.
Just another day!!!
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## Lights are on. Nobody home.
They're lying.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## Only nine billion Scoville units.
Hard to argue
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## If I had a child, it'd be working in the fields.
Ballmer peak.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## Best excuse for a three martini ever!
Good morning from Amsterdam! And now we wait ...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## Okay. What's the wait all about? For the check to arrive?
Nature is beautiful
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 4, 2019:
## The future of leather.
Dinner at the Cafe in Amsterdam.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 3, 2019:
## Too bad those pictures don't have a description of what kind of food it is.
A present for ME?
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 3, 2019:
## More like "Oh boy! I can play with the wrapping."
Bad time to be in Florida
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 3, 2019:
## Ohh -- sugary goodness on the horizon.
I'm wondering.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 3, 2019:
## First wife said if she couldn't provide me with sex, she'd hunt down another gal for me. "No telling what you'd bring home," she said.
Trump says his “real opponent” in 2020 election isn’t Democrats, it’s the “fake news ...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 3, 2019:
## Fact checking fills him with dread.
One Love me...honk
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 3, 2019:
## I'm stealing it and sending it abroad -- to a cute broad. πŸ˜›πŸ€ͺ⛹️‍♀️
Some of my favorite escapes Viceroy Tiger Swallowtail Monarch Tiger Swallowtail Amato Shrimp ...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 3, 2019:
## The first four are flying though my yard this week. I'm waiting for the sulfur butterflies next. A few of those are fish.
My extended family and I made it to the last day of the State Fair in Pueblo.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 3, 2019:
## Any hash brownie stands?
Trump+pancreatic cancer=justice
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 3, 2019:
## That's a longing to see him suffer, not justice.
1937 Himsl Zeppelin Roadliner Labatts streamliner trailer 1947 Just some trippy rigs
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 3, 2019:
## Which country was the factory located in?
Well...It's TRUE!!!!
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 3, 2019:
## As a child, I'd go "What's *that*?" That was the start of many a dumb question that was richly rewarded. Today I'm shameless enough to keep asking the dumb question.
It happens.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## Took longer than five minutes.
How @metalhead222 caught me! Lol
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## Somebody tell me what *all* those things are. I know what the beer and the cheetos are but the rest leaves me flat.
Hi in the chatroom if anyone is around.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## A prissy woman drug me away from the chat room, lest I be led astray by the wicked.
Interesting...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## The ideal present for those who want to give a fuck.
Pinterest Trailer Park Shit ...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## It's an upgrade from the snooty Yankee hot dish: dry white bread toast.
Good Morning Everyone. Cool and rainy here What about small acts?
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
>Cool and rainy here At dawn it was the lower 60's and heated up rapidly. Because of violent union busting in Dixie, joining a union is next to impossible.
Giggles.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## Doves are good eats. Until you have a bird feeder, you won't know those "peaceful" doves take names and kick the asses of other birds. Doves are mean little snits.
I love punning in Python....
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## Hecky durn. You got the Vikings singing the spam chorus.
sun tzu, the art of war, "if your enemy is arrogant or vain, you have the advantage.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## Sounds like Trump to me.
She was a blond.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## Before he was yanked off of NPR, Garrison Keeler had a parody detective series on his radio show. Garrison had more take offs on that line than anyone.
CELICE.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## Sounds like it would make one of the top ten of dumb things humans have done.
Life is an Illusion, a Dream, a Bubble, a Shadow.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## "Time is an illusion. Lunch time doubly so." -- Douglas Adams.
Connie and I made it safely to Amsterdam. Resting and drinking coffee before we explore!
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## What have you seen/done so far?
Just sharing the love..
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## Ah's a young innocent, ah is.
Ya Danial, we don't like rug burn either.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## Wait until he finds a sweet little thing that wants to shave his tasty bits. Thar me buckos are tales to tell that cross eyes.
Anally didn't get this one at first....
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 2, 2019:
## Scatological humor strikes!
Not her best...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 1, 2019:
## Before and after I've slept with her.
Who remembers these metal lunchboxes?
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 1, 2019:
The reason they're collector's items is they were given to children who banged them up and tore 'em up. Cheap thin metal.
Went to a reunion in Louisiana.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 1, 2019:
>The Old Testament is pre-Christian. Jesus didn't show up until the New Testament, that being mostly about him. Not entirely. A couple of the Old Testament books included defining which house the messiah would come from and other things to look for. Jesus failed on several of those descriptions, which rabbis will gladly tell you about.
No need for salt and pepper, seasoning are built right in.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 1, 2019:
## Because cannibals refer to eating their tribal enemies as "long pig" I'd recommend BBQ sauce.
Connie and I made it safely to Amsterdam. Resting and drinking coffee before we explore!
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 1, 2019:
## Watch out for tall women on bicycles.
Is the consumption of pork taboo you?
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 1, 2019:
## I'm looking for a nearby deli. Not Jewish.
[jta.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 1, 2019:
It means they **can** be charged and damages **can** be sought from his victims. If and when are in the wait and see group.
The kids know the score
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 1, 2019:
## Toot, toot, you snoot.
All they need now is banjos playing in the background... [youtu.be]
WonderWartHog99 comments on Sep 1, 2019:
## Sounds like bullshit to me.
To preface this, I'm not opposed to dating, I just think I'm not necessarily looking to date right ...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 31, 2019:
WWF? World Wildlife Federation?
Yesterday's forecast
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 31, 2019:
Last I hear it might come aground in South Carolina. Not that I know anybody living there. πŸ˜‰πŸ€£
Well.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 31, 2019:
## Petunia was disappointed she couldn't order a breakfast in a coffee shop in Amsterdam. She had hoped it'd be like a Starbucks instead of all that smoke.
Good Morning People - all the people.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 31, 2019:
Just got back from the grand tour of farmer's markets and second hand stores. Didn't run across anyone holding a yard sale. Among several other things, I got a salad shooter. Now I can blindfold and execute salads at dawn. πŸ˜‰πŸ€£
Really hoping that Hurricane Dorian demolishes all Trump's FL properties this weekend.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 31, 2019:
## Hecky durn. Petunia says the hurricane has changed course and may miss Florida entirely.
words of wisdom
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 31, 2019:
## Most people figure even the most complex machinery doesn't need any directions, especially if they have to assemble it.
How's your knowledge of medical terminology?
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 30, 2019:
## It'd be much better with captions.
Robert Crumb did a cartoon on the Trumps way back when! 1989 [dangerousminds.net]
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 30, 2019:
## Love Crumb but I haven't found an underground comic book store in a very long time.
Oh well.... I guess god doesn't agree [youtube.com]
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 30, 2019:
## When Petunia hears me comment about things religious, she steps away from me. She figures when God throws the lighting bolts, His aim might be off.
This is us!
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 30, 2019:
## Tim likes to say "fuck." That's because he thinks it will draw the sexually active to him. Tim has been mislead. We're going to kill him and have him for dinner.
Maybe they should put his claims to the test
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 30, 2019:
## Come on, you king of the Jews -- J.C. Superstar.
Just when you were thinking that the Christian far right could get more stupid they up their game ...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 30, 2019:
## It looked like three guys at the service, one of which bounced his balls off of a tomb stone. Two of them gave each other a French kiss over the tomb stone. Meh. Slow day in a small town.
Hey tRump, we're coming for you!
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 30, 2019:
## Just yesterday, I convinced myself not to replace the rusted and rotting Tiki torches I had been using in previous summers.
Harvested my crop of coriander seeds - already have a lare bag of frozen cilantro from the plants - ...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 30, 2019:
## Looks like enough seeds to plant an acre. With that kind of cooking, there ought to be some friendly women coming over for dinner.
Thank you everyone for your support on my blocking a member here who just kept coming after me.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 30, 2019:
## If only the American natives had blocked all those white people at the border....
Well Dorian missed Puerto Rico​ completely and is now headed directly for Mira Lard-go.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 30, 2019:
## Want to bet he's over insured?
Good Afternoon Everyone! I've been busy all morning organizing my now busy schedule on Google ...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 29, 2019:
> A local move is so much easier than a cross-country one. It's also way, way cheaper especially if you've got furniture.
[vice.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 29, 2019:
## Sounds like they're right.
I really liked @Marionville 's word this morning - "autodidactic" so I thought I'd go along with ...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 29, 2019:
Pedagogue sounds too much like a child molester with a diary.
Internet dating, what not to do (like definitely the one thing you absolutely don't do).
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 29, 2019:
## I try not to think too long on why guys do that. It never works, even if it's hot, throbbing and purple.
Know your knives.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 29, 2019:
The Chinese cleaver is identified as a fillet knife. A fillet knife is a long thin knife used to delicately to remove the bones from meat whereas a cleaver is used to cut both meat and bones into hunks. A cleaver is used with fearsome force. A fillet knife is used with a delicate feel. Worlds apart. Pass me that cutlass for the growling cusses. A Bowie knife would do.
Can't wait to ditch this caliginous state of the union.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 29, 2019:
## It sounds like fog at night, dark and clammy.
Welcome to the feels bar. What's bothering you?
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 28, 2019:
## I had a hummingbird feeder that got trashed by high winds. I promptly replaced it with a different, prettier feeder that the birds are ignoring. It's important to me because the hummers also eat small bugs like gnats and house flies. They move so fast, you'll never catch them doing it.
The smart one
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 28, 2019:
## Engineer: I think we have a glass problem here.
Eco-Viking
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 28, 2019:
## Skulls don't hold anyway near as much liquid as cheap plastic cups. They tend to be leaky. As a drinking vessel they're disappointing. Don't quote me. I don't want law enforcement darkening my door step and asking "Where did you get all those skulls?"
Mores - Pronunciation is moray - but please don't confuse it with the tropical eels which have no ...
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 28, 2019:
## When I look back at my youth, I'm prone to say "The times! The mores! They will never come again!" After that I start singing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QptZ8tYZAkE
I can't stop laughing!
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 28, 2019:
## I have too many clothes to put all of them in one suitcase.
Question: How many of you got into a bad relationship because of great sex?
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 28, 2019:
## I'm not going to that bar again ever since two women . . . . yea, well I shouldn't give all the details.
ZEPHYR.
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 28, 2019:
## Yesterday the zephyrs bought a light rain and temperatures that didn't go over 80F. We're planning leaf peeping tours in the mountains next month.
Should I get it?????
WonderWartHog99 comments on Aug 28, 2019:
## What's your sop for "God bless you, darling. You want your coffee now?" My sop is "I wanted it 20 minutes ago. Could you do some time travel and bring it to me then?"

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Him and his ilk are my summer companions.
Atheist
Here for community
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