Praise the Lord

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 18, 2019:

I've had this conversation: If you can't explain it, call it mysterious. Hey, I love a mystery. Why don't we solve it? Go away

I really do hate small talk...this made me laugh

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

Don't forget the hot dripping wonder dong of a dick flowing with head cheese. I think I can hear someone cringing at that thought.

The fuckening.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

I stay confused. I know too well what a fuck is and love to do it. So why would fuck be referred to something bad? If a gal says "Let's fuck" I figure she likes me. It's rare for me to turn down an offer to spend the day fucking. I've done it and it's rare that I'll say "no thanks." Fuck gets used to mean **so many things** it doesn't seem to mean all that much.

Ok folks, back from 2 weeks on the Appalachian trail through Pennsylvania.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

Links just wannta go crappy. At what mile marker to you depart from?

A dog and his smiley ball

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

Logically, the alignment of the ball would random. That would mean the teeth would run from to top to bottom as often as side to side.

Funny true story from work.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

Dude, did 'ya get it in writing?

LOL...sigh...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

I've yet to get a discount for having a female doctor.

A young lady blogger whom I follow recently wrote the following: "Life is supposed to be fun, you ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

I've given up being rotated by sex goddesses who pay the maid.

Today's 🧀🧀🧀🧀 is blonde....

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

Why are blonde jokes so short? So the brunettes can remember them.

Mom says okay, if you got hold a riot.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

How sweet. She even packed him a lunch.

Required reading.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

Oh, daddy aren't you the serious one? Lizards just wanta have fun.

How it works.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

Percy reconsidered if he ought adopt me after he hid in a storage closet three days after I brought him home.

McMiracle.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

Like Ronald, none of the brick wall he's leaning on burned.

Good Morning All.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

>My daughter's appeal got rejected by NH Supreme Court, I''m amazed it got that far. In the meantime, now the final move is approaching, I wonder how many side trips you made to charitable groups (i.e. Goodwill) and to the dump you've made.

Have a nice day?

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

Don't mind me. I'm just passing through.

KAKIDROSIS.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

Sounds like my armpits after a week long hike on the trail without a shower.

People really do this

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

When I discover while she was visiting, she helped herself to a couple of rolls of coins in my change jar.

So made another little leap forward tonight in my growth post divorce.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

I didn't hear from my ex for two decades. When I did hear from her, her husband was breathing down her neck trying to get her to sell me Amway. When that didn't work, he gave me a follow up call. Two months later, they were both dead. It made the papers. Best divorce ever!

Emma gets it.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

Sounds like a plan. More tacos!

“Green” gas

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

Pump the OJ out of the orange handle.

Say it ain't so!

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 17, 2019:

# I can hear Doctor Trump now # The best, the greatest, most qualified snakes.......every bottle! Cures everything ........you get tired being healthy......... squzed right. Strained......poopified......approved by 10 out of 10 doctors.....850 quacks agree! Believe me.

I am confused! How can we meet anyone single on this group site, all I see are comments, so am I ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 16, 2019:

Disclaimer: Not looking. Old grumpy people living in the city they dare not mention living far away from each other might have something to do it. Yea, I could take the next north bound bus to Fuckaduck Canada from Big Dangle, Florida to see Ahoogasue.

Well just what the hell, Alabama? [patheos.com]

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 16, 2019:

Police are loyal to whoever pays them as long as it's **legal.** They won't be passing Father Bill cans of gasoline to burn down the church because that would make them accessories to the crime.

another waitress joke

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 16, 2019:

Moan.

Who goes by north & south???

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 16, 2019:

Once I had a theory: to have a navigator on trips, they'd need a compass to relate to the map. I didn't want to keep pulling over to the side of the road to read the map. Got a compass on the dashboard. Got a traveling companions who promised to play navigator. Gave them the map with a high lighted route. Showed them the compass. Got lost anyway. Once on a trip, I circled Baton Rouge, La., three times because I depended on my navigator. Theory #2: GPS will guide me there and back. That was followed by lost signal and a navigator who constantly argues with it when it has a signal. Theory #3: a map wouldn't lie.

That’s a fact, Jack

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 16, 2019:

We will always have alcohol poisoning to console us

It might not be but.......DRAGONS!

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 16, 2019:

Going into the arson report, fur sure, fur sure.

On a serious note...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 16, 2019:

People with a ball point pen can steal more than a bank robber. Want to see my water front property at low tide?

The Birth of Philosophy

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 16, 2019:

I think that I think, therefore I am, I think.

Let me introduce you to Danielle Knudson, Canadian Model ! ❤

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 16, 2019:

Got to go to Canada? Might be worth the trip.

He should have sent Rake Force

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

Don't think I'll ever visit that place again.

I don’t think we could honk loud enough

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

Ah hooga!

There's white and then there's white....

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

Don't know why anyone would consider this meme racist.

It took me a second...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

The power jack vanishes beneath the waves. (It refers to a movie about an icy ship wreck).

It's a never ending cycle!

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

In Louisiana, the fatal cycle is peel a hot, spicy crayfish (aka mud bug). Eat the tail, suck the head, notice it is so hot you could use a beer. Repeat.

I've gotten to know an older guy from my dance class.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

>Do I ask his intentions? You first -- you tell him your intentions. Here in Dixie "you sexy thing" is flattery. It doesn't mean humping their bones with wild abandon is an optional extra.

They found a cure

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

One of the problems with stealing this meme is I don't know anyone **personally** that reads enough about Trump that gets the joke. I'm in Seneca, SC, a half horse town of Trump supporters. It's not the half of the horse that eats.

EROTIC, SEXY, CLASSY ... were her names!

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

She tended to play roles that demanded a wiggle and a giggle.

Bed time guys, good night!

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

She looks rather coy in her pjs.

She's looking for the bus while I'm looking at her.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

Is LiterateHiker (the gal who complained about objectifying women) still a member of this group? She hasn't made any replies in this group. I keep waiting for someone to add "She's such cute bitch." There's no way I am going to say it. Mystery #2: I've been wondering why my notifications to new posts seems to be turned off. I've checked my settings and it didn't change anything.

Poor Pee Wee. Never live it down

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

Do porno movie houses still exist?

In your best feminine voice

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

Dam those Canadians! I've had arguments on line with Brits who don't consider the American version of bacon, bacon. Their version is ham as well. The gringo version is fried pig belly, almost completely fried fat. It's part of our grand plan to die from heart blockages and/or strokes.

We have a tornado warning on , we have lemon cake in bed , we have a night off AND still no sleep , ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

>we have dogs . . . . Who says single is bad # We? How many people are you?

How long into dating someone, do you wait to ask their religious preference?

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

Jesus freaks and Jews tell people immediately. You don't have to ask.

TWITTER URGED TO SUSPEND DONALD TRUMP AFTER PRESIDENT ACCUSED OF ‘SHARING PROPAGANDA VIDEOS ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

Not going to happen. It's an account that draws people to twitter that otherwise would ignore Twitter. Trump's account is a major draw for customers, most of whom assume they will be having a conversation with the President. On the positive side, Twitter no longer allows him to block people who don't give him positive feed back. No longer can people boast "I was blocked by the President of the US on Twitter." We should have given awards for that.

Just a few more steps towards an American Dictatorship.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 15, 2019:

There are always have been a significant personage of Americans who'd prefer a dictatorship. They got to vote.

According to statistics, the average person over 18 consumes 3 alcoholic drinks a week.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 14, 2019:

I'm covered until April 3, 3456

Like most people my age, I'm 20.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 14, 2019:

In dog years, I'm dead.

Ok.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 14, 2019:

It reminds me of a gal who told me a dating site guy that promised to hunt her down and *force* her to go out with him. Here's your sign:

Wonder if they cook in there

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 14, 2019:

They stole the hub cabs!

UNPOPULAR OPINIONS! What’s something you love that everyone else hates?

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 14, 2019:

When I make my own pizza from scratch and add five cans of anchovies, it clears the room. I haven't seen an anchovie pizza offered anywhere. Throw in a pitcher of **dark** beer and I'm happy. Same thing for cooking liver, kidneys and menudo (aka menudito). Although it's Mexican hang over helper, Mexican restaurants keep menudo off the menu. If they put it on the menu, it's off the menu the next weekend. I love jazz, an original American music form that accounts for under 1% of all music sales. Overseas, it's another story. Best gringo export we've got. Now let's have brainyactress give us the tour of Atlanta's south side funky town.

My older brother was a devout JW elder and bought himself a huge 8' tall telescope to explore the ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 14, 2019:

Tell him it's the third black hole on the left. ;-)

Ghost hunters

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 14, 2019:

I would try to watch those shows until I started laughing that they'd take **anything** as proof of a haunting. Hey, there's a cold draft here! Haunts, I tell 'ya!

got to change my approach !

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 14, 2019:

I used to know a guy who'd get laid by asking random women if he could fuck 'em. Of course, he got in trouble 99% of the time. After that, he'd get laid. Key phrase: used to know. He maybe laying in an unmarked grave now.

Lol, can't even, it's just funny.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 14, 2019:

It's next to the any key on the keyboard.

The good old days

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 14, 2019:

Back when men where men, women were women and horses were hamburger helper.

Whee! I got a rainbow on my private mail page. Bring in the dancing girls.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 14, 2019:

Once again, if the words in the post and the ones in the meme don't agree, they'll go with the meme every time. I that I was happy to see a new feature in the software. Everybody else went along with a funny meme on serious drinking.

Good Morning All.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 13, 2019:

I came dangerously close to meeting this cat. He's on a couple of my coffee cups.

Hate it when that happens

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 13, 2019:

If you want your own seat on the bus, wear a shirt that says "Ask me about Jesus."

William Barr Obliterated the DOJ’s Standard for Defending Laws Because Donald Trump Asked By ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 13, 2019:

Trump care is called sicken and die. Remember repeal and replace? It is never a **good** replacement plan.

Always looking for the right person.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 13, 2019:

Gomez : [as he helps Morticia out of a trap] Leather straps, red-hot pokers! Morticia : Later, my dearest.

Keeping up with the Jones.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 13, 2019:

Film at 11.

I know i've been gone a few days, i had an accident monday night.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 13, 2019:

You got my sympathy. Here's your tea (_)?

Made me laugh, even though I'm not sure I want to open this can of worms....

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 13, 2019:

Ohhh . . . . worms. Let's all go fishing.

@CaroleKay is our new Mod.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 13, 2019:

>I have my reasons. That is **your problem.

Now that the button is fixed.....

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 13, 2019:

Naughty, naughty Kirby.

This is epic! ???

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 13, 2019:

Who are you people?

Smart kid. They claims he is all seeing, bullshit.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 12, 2019:

Stealing, printing and hanging high on the wall.

Ok, I brought this up once and thought I had a solution, but I don’t.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 12, 2019:

I've seen my share of posts on Trump Pinata this morning. I've seen **too many** duplicate notices for the same person making the same post.

White House proposed releasing immigrant detainees in sanctuary cities, targeting political foes ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 12, 2019:

I've posted about this today using a different source. Mine said that at first ICE thought it was a joke.

Bluffton SC, about a half hour from Savannah, GA roughly an hour and a 1/2 from Charleston.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 12, 2019:

Buffton, SC is for those who can't afford Hilton Head, which is almost next door.

????....

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 12, 2019:

Screw it. Where's my beer? I figure Pepsi is just a sweeter, flat version of Coke. Overall on the soda front, how come almost nobody gives you the two cents plain (carbonated water)?

And around and around we go...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

That explains it.

CHROMOSOMES(to help understand zygote and the new 6 week fertilized zygote as human).

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

Bevis and Butthead are real.

CHROMOSOMES(to help understand zygote and the new 6 week fertilized zygote as human).

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

What? You've never heard of the phrase "fucking idiots?" I can't see them visiting this site to enlarge their vocabulary.

So, how does it feel now that we now live under a dictatorship since tRump has decapitated our ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

Like I ought deport myself.

Why am I not surprised?

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

To me, the big thing is among the major survivors was their cats. The cats kept rodents away. The rodents were the disease vector. However, the numb nuts figured if you didn't get sick **and** had a cat, you must be a witch. As we all know, witches are put to death. That's one of the reasons Petunia has a grudge against my Tom cat, Percy.

I have set myself the goal of completing the Triple Crown of American through-hiking.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

Like most people I've hiked **sections** of the PCT and AT but not the whole thing. The most difficult part of the AT runs through the Smoky Mountains National Park.

Good morning and happy Thursday, all you lovely people!

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

Here in Seneca, SC, it's happy Thursday **evening.** Today they have *Jazz on Ram Cat Alley.* It's almost never jazz, there are no fur covered cats because people bring their dogs and it's on a two lane street -- not an alley. They're not too good about telling lies in this town. Good deal: it's free to hear the band. However, they overcharge you for the optional food and drinks. Last week I took Petunia and she was angry because we found a table in the street with Yankees that moved here. This morning she was telling me we shouldn't go if they're going to have Yankees, those evil people responsible for the war of northern aggression. ??? If I go alone, she claims I'll need a designated drive after one beer. Volunteer and I'll buy you a beer.

Definitely not the same

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

I prefer the Mexican restaurant game of "It's on the menu but we don't have it." It takes three to nine picks later to find out what they do have. You think they'd cross a few things off the menu but noooooo. The gringo version is "We got beer but we don't know what kind of beer we got." The deluxe version comes when I say I want a dark draft and they start to rattle off the IPA (Indian **pale** ale) "beers" in bottles. The Chinese version is "we got the **authentic** good stuff but it's not on the menu. This is the round eye menu."

Teach your children well:

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

8: I brought you into this world and I can take you out of it.

North Dakota may be the least visited state in the Union, but there are pretty sunrises here.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

It's the 46th least visited state. Least visited state is Nebraska, next (shockingly) is Delware and Iowa. Where the population density is less than one per acre with freezing wind and featureless great plains, I can see nobody wanting to visit. If high point of the day is the sun rise . . .? What's the deal with Delware?

I had a scammer call my cell phone for the umpteenth time wanting my insurance numbers for a ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

I always ask scammers "Where are you physically located? If I wanted to talk to you **in person** at your work place, where you are **right now** where would I go? What is your street address?" It's so much fun to hear 'em squirm and tell you they don't know. "What the fuck over? They blind fold you and dump you off at work every day? What kind of fuck head doesn't know where he works?"

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez calls out GOP “rhetoric” after Ohio group calls her a “domestic ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

Get out the baby Trump blimp and call him bat shit crazy.

Laughter is yadda, yadda, here we are.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

Jiggling joggers, of course.

What is your Confederate nickname?

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

One of the stranger theories is because so many rust belt companies relocated in Dixie, they may have won the war. Additionally **real** confederate currency is worth more than current US dollars. Ergo the slogan *Save your confederate money. The South shall rise again!"

This is a honey bee.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

I'm a beekeeper and I endorse this message. Under most conditions bees have no interest in stinging anything. I've had them working hard in the yard and ran the lawn mower over them. They never stung me because I mowed the yard. Now if you want to start tearing the hive apart to get the honey, they will have issues with you. However, if your want to stick your arm **inside** the hive, 99% of them will ignore you. You can't get anywhere near a wasp's home without getting the holy who ha's stung out of you.

Ain't it the truth

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

I've never been drunk enough to think I can dance without people laughing at me. ??????

You may be cool ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

I'm so cool, you could store meat inside of me -- A former president of the galaxy, Zaphod Beeblebrox.

Past loves can be to memorable! Flower Face - Angela. [youtube.com]

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

I only had one brief fling with a Playboy bunny. My first wife pointed her out in the magazine to me. It made me smile.

This would be a good feature to have.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

I belong to the erotic memes group. Mostly pictures hot women and once in a while the hot women swap a picture of a hot dude. Trans do whatever. Out of the middle of nowhere a gal posts we should stop objectifying women. I replied that we're enjoying views of the best a human body can get. This is one of the frequent goals of artists for eons. I'm an ugly looking old fart and when Mr. Stud Bunny with the washboard abs shows up, it doesn't depress me one bit. Her links claim ugly women are driven into suicidal depressions over Miss High Bust to Waist Ratio with the flawless skin (and often photo shopped). She had no concern about the guys getting objectified. After I'd explained it to her, I never heard a reply or another post from her. Sometimes I wonder if I've been blocked or she ran away in terror that somebody didn't agree with and **gave reasons.** I can be dangerous when I'm making sense.

Please Excuse my Language! How does this fucking media keep covering this lying deceitful ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

>How does this fucking media . . . . . Yousa boss! All fucking all the the time. Ah's crotches stay wet and sore all the time. With all those orgies, we hardly have any time to write anything. > . . . keep covering this lying deceitful criminal traitor know as the president! Let me 'span something to you, Lucy. Most powerful leader of the free world, head of most powerful military the planet has ever seen, able to render our planet lifeless for an eon or two . . . . He bears watching.

Good morning all, I also have apparently been reported as acting in some subversive way on the ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

I don't know how anyone would be offended by something along the lines of "Hey, you friendless crazy shit . . ." Maybe it's my personal density.

How many of us Hikers have been instructed in, or practice orienteering? @Literatehiker?

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

I studied marine navigation while in the US Navy. That was because I started noticing their navigators spent a lot of time arguing where they were and which way they were going. With just a map, you'll get creative about getting loss.

How many of us Hikers have been instructed in, or practice orienteering? @Literatehiker?

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

Moss grows on the shady side of the tree.

different shit

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

Sometimes it's a revolving door.

Another one of those days

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

Fur sure, fur sure.

Inside Trump’s ‘truly bizarre’ visit to Mt.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

The site cited says "A recent survey conducted by the Woodrow Wilson National Fellowship Foundation found that just four in 10 Americans today can pass the country's citizenship exam, which is comprised of several multiple-choice questions about the Constitution and American history, such as "Who did the United States fight during World War II?" and "What is one right granted under the First Amendment to the Constitution?" Consider what elected him.

This is what happens when you let government legislate anything and everything. :)

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

Ah's too young and innocent to ask what 'cha smoking.

Unless your ancestry were living, breathing, working, loving and dying on this land prior to ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

The problem with native Americans is their border patrol.