So, if this is a kink community, what are y'all's favorites? Mine is hypnosis/mind-play.

webbew1 comments on Sep 9, 2018:

Nothing too crazy. I just love great sex and don’t believe in the rules of engagement which western society places upon people regarding their sexuality unless it involves under age or involuntary participation. I despise both feminists and religious fanatics equally in regards to their penchant...

graceylou replies on Sep 9, 2018:

Really? Feminists? That’s a new one. I consider myself a feminist. Feel free to hate me then.

I'm really wondering why it would be anyone else's business whether someone is monogamous or ...

EdEarl comments on Sep 8, 2018:

People fear things they do not understand, and that fear often leads to them not learning about the things they do not understand. Often they invent something awful about the thing they don't understand and decide only malevolent people would be that way. So they become bigots. You have nothing ...

graceylou replies on Sep 9, 2018:

@EdEarl They should exclude themselves from my life I say.

I'm really wondering why it would be anyone else's business whether someone is monogamous or ...

SallyInStitches comments on Sep 8, 2018:

I normally comment on such posts, explaining my experiences & my take on ethical non-monogamy/polyamory. I've not gotten any private messages 1 way or another in response, though I'd find such interesting. My poly relationships tend to be very long lasting & committed; 8 yrs, 17 yrs, 20+yrs & 6...

graceylou replies on Sep 9, 2018:

Mine too: 20 plus years , 10 plus years, 2 years with my newest.

I'm really wondering why it would be anyone else's business whether someone is monogamous or ...

ScottRP comments on Sep 8, 2018:

It sounds like you are getting that kind of judgement on this site which I find it disquieting. If anyone should understand what it means to feel something different than what is considered normal, it should be nonreligious people.

graceylou replies on Sep 9, 2018:

I’ve come across numerous people who are judgemental and closed-minded here. Like you, I expected what you expected.

I'm really wondering why it would be anyone else's business whether someone is monogamous or ...

EdEarl comments on Sep 8, 2018:

People fear things they do not understand, and that fear often leads to them not learning about the things they do not understand. Often they invent something awful about the thing they don't understand and decide only malevolent people would be that way. So they become bigots. You have nothing ...

graceylou replies on Sep 9, 2018:

Thank you but this doesn’t involve my friends or family. I’m talking about members of this site. I feel bitterness in those people who criticize me. It almost feels like they feel it’s not fair they have no one (and are looking) and poly people have several.

I'm really wondering why it would be anyone else's business whether someone is monogamous or ...

seattlepanda comments on Sep 8, 2018:

I find any human society to be inherently judgemental in some aspect...something we all have to deal with...

graceylou replies on Sep 8, 2018:

I do know that. I think I’m just frustrated. Judgy people frustrate me.

Should I get the flu vaccine? What to know before flu season

graceylou comments on Sep 8, 2018:

I won't ever get the flu vaccine. I don't ever get the flu. I don't even get colds. I used to work with kids, and with kids, one or more of them are always sick. I had coworkers who were sick all the time, and some of my friends I hang out with are sick all the time. I never catch their cold or flu ...

graceylou replies on Sep 8, 2018:

@Mike1947 I don't ever rest but my energy level is insane. Stress is hard to manage but I try. The key for me is eating healthy, getting balanced nutrition without eating meat, dairy, egg, and other animal products. I don't eat junk food or fast food. I don't smoke, drink, do drugs. And, I don't go crazy cleaning everything to the point of eliminating all germs so I get exposure to them and develop some level of immunity.

What is something you ate growing up that you never ate again once you became an adult?

graceylou comments on Sep 7, 2018:

Cow tongue. Fried squid. Later on in adulthood: meats, dairy, eggs, anything from animals.

graceylou replies on Sep 8, 2018:

@Shelton I didn’t hate it then but now the thought makes me ill. My mom also forced me to eat/drink things with dairy milk though I’m lactose intolerant. She also made me eat tomato soup (as a kid I called it red soup and I really hated it) though I’m allergic to tomatoes.

How many hours a day do you spend on Agnostics?

graceylou comments on Sep 7, 2018:

I work for myself, and I work everyday, so I might just leave myself logged in during the day (on my laptop or phone) and peek in now and then when I'm not too occupied with other duties.

graceylou replies on Sep 7, 2018:

@TheDoubter I have to be in the office during business hours whether people show up or not. And I'm here sometimes 10-12 hours everyday. When I get everything done that needs to get done, I just poke around the office anyhow.

Speaking of orgies, anyone else here a fan of the TV show Versailles?

Sticks48 comments on Sep 6, 2018:

I have my heard of this show. Where do you get it?

graceylou replies on Sep 6, 2018:

Never mind. It asks you to sign in with a local TV provider account (and for me requires Optik TV for live streaming, but I only have satellite).

Speaking of orgies, anyone else here a fan of the TV show Versailles?

Sticks48 comments on Sep 6, 2018:

I have my heard of this show. Where do you get it?

graceylou replies on Sep 6, 2018:

Apparently it’s on Netflix. There’s an online source to watch it on this local channel’s website but I don’t know if it’s accessible outside of Canada. I will check when I get a chance.

Speaking of orgies, anyone else here a fan of the TV show Versailles?

Wrytyr comments on Sep 6, 2018:

Never heard of it. But the only 'premium' channel I get is Showtime and that's only because it was free with my useless Comcast cable package. I seldom even watch it.

graceylou replies on Sep 6, 2018:

Originally it was broadcast on BBC2 which I don’t get in my satellite tv (I get some other BBC channels). Now it’s playing on a local channel on basic TV.

Speaking of orgies, anyone else here a fan of the TV show Versailles?

Tibert comments on Sep 6, 2018:

What about Louis XIV (Let be somewhat accurate), think about it they did not have Netflix so they had to act it out!

graceylou replies on Sep 6, 2018:

Of course. And no internet porn.

I saw somebody ask if, as religion fades, polyamory will overtake monogamy as the dominant practice.

Heathen1997 comments on Sep 6, 2018:

How many people assumed I meant, "in plain view," when I said, "public?" To quote myself, "A bar that cards people at the door is still called, "public," isn't it?"

graceylou replies on Sep 6, 2018:

@Heathen1997 I seem to recall a lot of non-monogamy in the bible (polygamous marriages). A lot of religions promote or condone polygamy as well.

Speaking of orgies, anyone else here a fan of the TV show Versailles?

Our_existence comments on Sep 6, 2018:

What's a little fun among friends

graceylou replies on Sep 6, 2018:

Nothing to lose your head over for sure.

Speaking of orgies, anyone else here a fan of the TV show Versailles?

zorialoki comments on Sep 6, 2018:

Where is it aired?

graceylou replies on Sep 6, 2018:

@zorialoki That was on Amazon.

Speaking of orgies, anyone else here a fan of the TV show Versailles?

zorialoki comments on Sep 6, 2018:

Where is it aired?

graceylou replies on Sep 6, 2018:

@zorialoki I've been trying to find the DVD or blueray set but all I could find is for Region 2 (not for North America). Sigh.

Speaking of orgies, anyone else here a fan of the TV show Versailles?

zorialoki comments on Sep 6, 2018:

Where is it aired?

graceylou replies on Sep 6, 2018:

@zorialoki May be someone else can find another option for you in the US.

Speaking of orgies, anyone else here a fan of the TV show Versailles?

zorialoki comments on Sep 6, 2018:

Where is it aired?

graceylou replies on Sep 6, 2018:

@zorialoki Episodes are available online for free viewing on the network's website, but I don't know if it's available to viewers in the US. So apparently it is available on Netflix.

Speaking of orgies, anyone else here a fan of the TV show Versailles?

GipsyOfNewSpain comments on Sep 6, 2018:

It was France and it's so Decadent Court. Used to be Athens, Rome... etc.

graceylou replies on Sep 6, 2018:

@GipsyOfNewSpain Oh really? LOL. I did not know Canada would be Forbidden Land. Well, at that time there was no Canada officially.

Speaking of orgies, anyone else here a fan of the TV show Versailles?

zorialoki comments on Sep 6, 2018:

Where is it aired?

graceylou replies on Sep 6, 2018:

I'm in Canada so I'm not sure about the US. It's available on my local network TV. I don't have Netflix and such but may be it's available there? I don't know. The series is a France/Canada collaboration.

Speaking of orgies, anyone else here a fan of the TV show Versailles?

GipsyOfNewSpain comments on Sep 6, 2018:

It was France and it's so Decadent Court. Used to be Athens, Rome... etc.

graceylou replies on Sep 6, 2018:

Yes, it was Louis XIV's France, at that!! I love this time period.

I saw somebody ask if, as religion fades, polyamory will overtake monogamy as the dominant practice.

Heathen1997 comments on Sep 6, 2018:

How many people assumed I meant, "in plain view," when I said, "public?" To quote myself, "A bar that cards people at the door is still called, "public," isn't it?"

graceylou replies on Sep 6, 2018:

Whatever public is supposed to mean, what do orgies have to do with polyamory?

Just before my bedtime my favourite Norwegians, a-ha.

graceylou comments on Sep 5, 2018:

He’s got to be one of the most beautiful men that has ever lived (and extremely talented). The hair is nice but kinda hides his gorgeous face a bit too much.

graceylou replies on Sep 5, 2018:

@Marionville I know hey. I remember the days I had all those posters on my walls. Morten was up there too.

Just before my bedtime my favourite Norwegians, a-ha.

graceylou comments on Sep 5, 2018:

He’s got to be one of the most beautiful men that has ever lived (and extremely talented). The hair is nice but kinda hides his gorgeous face a bit too much.

graceylou replies on Sep 5, 2018:

@Marionville Actually they toured Canada in 2016 and 2017. I think most of North America and other places in the world as well. I was never into Simon back in my teenage years though. John though has been the love of my life for over 30 years. LOL.

Just before my bedtime my favourite Norwegians, a-ha.

graceylou comments on Sep 5, 2018:

He’s got to be one of the most beautiful men that has ever lived (and extremely talented). The hair is nice but kinda hides his gorgeous face a bit too much.

graceylou replies on Sep 5, 2018:

@Marionville Morten looks great. And he is in great shape. I went to see Duran Duran live a couple of years ago. I think Simon is sexier now than way back then.

Just before my bedtime my favourite Norwegians, a-ha.

graceylou comments on Sep 5, 2018:

He’s got to be one of the most beautiful men that has ever lived (and extremely talented). The hair is nice but kinda hides his gorgeous face a bit too much.

graceylou replies on Sep 5, 2018:

@Marionville That is true. I'm a Duran Duran fan (and yes, some people laugh at me), and I currently have 14 of their albums (and that's not all of them). Granted they had many hits but most people think they had died off a long time ago even though they've released many albums since the 80s. I guess it depends on how much of a fan you are. I haven't really followed a-ha and Morten much myself but thank goodness for Facebook it's easier to find them again (and other artists I know from the past).

Just before my bedtime my favourite Norwegians, a-ha.

graceylou comments on Sep 5, 2018:

He’s got to be one of the most beautiful men that has ever lived (and extremely talented). The hair is nice but kinda hides his gorgeous face a bit too much.

graceylou replies on Sep 5, 2018:

@Marionville I just watched the first. I was on my phone so didn't want to watch a tiny screen.

Awww .. let me see.

JeremyTaylor comments on Sep 5, 2018:

@graceylou

graceylou replies on Sep 5, 2018:

You know me too well. Except I wouldn't even say "Cool". May be just shrug.

I think I need this shirt

graceylou comments on Sep 4, 2018:

I think I might qualify for two of those on the list.

graceylou replies on Sep 5, 2018:

@Lukian For the sake of science.

I think I need this shirt

graceylou comments on Sep 4, 2018:

I think I might qualify for two of those on the list.

graceylou replies on Sep 5, 2018:

@JeremyTaylor I don’t think I need this shirt after all. I need a lab coat.

I think I need this shirt

graceylou comments on Sep 4, 2018:

I think I might qualify for two of those on the list.

graceylou replies on Sep 5, 2018:

@JeremyTaylor oh, live video evidence wasn’t enough eh?

I think I need this shirt

graceylou comments on Sep 4, 2018:

I think I might qualify for two of those on the list.

graceylou replies on Sep 4, 2018:

@JeremyTaylor You are one of the privileged few.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Cutiebeauty comments on Sep 4, 2018:

I'm open to meeting men but I get private msgs from all types of people, some from those "here for community ". I don't think men are as intelligent as women in this regard. What can you do?

graceylou replies on Sep 4, 2018:

Not much I guess. If they are nice I will talk to them. If not, I will just block. I don't particularly want to deal with believers and don't know why they are here.

Ethical non-mongamy.

graceylou comments on Sep 3, 2018:

I’m poly. I think I’ve probably always known monogamy is not for me and would be very suffocating if I were stuck in a monogamous relationship. I’m not into open relationships in the sense that I don’t simply look for partners for sex but I’m open to exploring new relationships with new ...

graceylou replies on Sep 4, 2018:

@StrongHappySilly I will look into it. I have a number of books I'm considering for my turn to choose a book. I just found it on Amazon, kindle edition is $6.49. Sweeeeeeeeet!!! I bought it.

Ethical non-mongamy.

graceylou comments on Sep 3, 2018:

I’m poly. I think I’ve probably always known monogamy is not for me and would be very suffocating if I were stuck in a monogamous relationship. I’m not into open relationships in the sense that I don’t simply look for partners for sex but I’m open to exploring new relationships with new ...

graceylou replies on Sep 4, 2018:

@StrongHappySilly LOL. I tend to be open-minded about just about anything as long as it's not hurting others, and I hate judgemental people. Ugh. Always open to making new friends. I just went and read your response to tibert. I don't bother responding to people with those opinions about non-monogamy anymore. It's impossible to change their mind once it's set that way. There are no rules stating that humans have to be monogamous. People who can't differentiate between cheating and sharing/exploring with consenting partners where all parties have knowledge of and are in agreement with one another are simply closed off to the idea that there are more relationship forms than what they have been taught growing up. As someone with a background in Anthropology, I've learned that the majority of the world's cultures have traditionally supported non-monogamous families/relationships. Of course we know of many polygynous cultures but I know of at least one polyandrous one in I believe Thailand where a woman marries a set of brothers. Of course, we don't necessarily want to marry or even have strong bonds with everyone we are in a non-monogamous relationship/situation with but it just shows that monogamy isn't the most prevalent arrangement among humans. And yeah, even in this community of atheists/agnostics, I've found some people are very close-minded and old-fashioned, very conservative, set in old ways, much like believers. Some are against tattoos, especially on women. Many men think women should have long hair and look feminine. That sort of thing. I hardly respond to those posts anymore. It's useless to do so. Why judge others in matters that don't concern them and don't hurt them in any way?

Ethical non-mongamy.

graceylou comments on Sep 3, 2018:

I’m poly. I think I’ve probably always known monogamy is not for me and would be very suffocating if I were stuck in a monogamous relationship. I’m not into open relationships in the sense that I don’t simply look for partners for sex but I’m open to exploring new relationships with new ...

graceylou replies on Sep 4, 2018:

@StrongHappySilly People who don't need to know, really don't need to know. My friends know. My family, some know, some don't live nearby and don't need to know. I don't discuss it at work. My love and sex life is none of their business. I live in rural country Alberta, closest town with population of 2000. I don't really care if people know but I don't exactly announce it to the public. It's not any of their business. I would say even in the bible belt there are still groups of people like you who have meetups locally. May be worth looking into.

Ethical non-mongamy.

graceylou comments on Sep 3, 2018:

I’m poly. I think I’ve probably always known monogamy is not for me and would be very suffocating if I were stuck in a monogamous relationship. I’m not into open relationships in the sense that I don’t simply look for partners for sex but I’m open to exploring new relationships with new ...

graceylou replies on Sep 4, 2018:

@StrongHappySilly Sure why not.

Which are your favourite cities/towns to visit?

genessa comments on Sep 2, 2018:

To visit? not los angeles, but i loved living there! to visit, hmm. magome (in japan). likewise kyoto. portmeirion, wales. dingle, ireland. paris! i loved new orleans both times i visited but i fear it may have changed post-katrina. i have not had a chance to go see. i love looking at the ...

graceylou replies on Sep 4, 2018:

New Orleans has recovered quite well but many areas still have evidence of the devastation. The worst damage avoided the tourist areas like the French Quarter, Canal Street, Garden District, so for the most part tourists won’t notice Katrina damage. You can still have your beignets with cafe au lait at Cafe du Monde in the French Market.

Ethical non-mongamy.

graceylou comments on Sep 3, 2018:

I’m poly. I think I’ve probably always known monogamy is not for me and would be very suffocating if I were stuck in a monogamous relationship. I’m not into open relationships in the sense that I don’t simply look for partners for sex but I’m open to exploring new relationships with new ...

graceylou replies on Sep 4, 2018:

@StrongHappySilly Oh I would never suggest that those who participate in other forms of ethical non-monogamy don’t respect non-amorous sex partners. Many people who are in open relationships, who are swingers, who switch partners, etc. are friends, coworkers, members of clubs, and so on. And I don’t judge. Anyone can have sex with anyone who’s a consenting adult for whatever reason. And by love i don’t mean it’s necessarily romantic love either; it can be a deep bond or friendship. I was simply describing my form of ethical monogamy. I need that strong bond and connection with my partners, with sex not being of primary importance (but still important). Others in ethical monogamous relationships may not or may just have that with one partner, and that’s just fine with me.

Ridiculous Rumors

graceylou comments on Sep 3, 2018:

The rumour mill started early for me. When I was 5 I was hanging around with my younger brother who was 3. We were yapping about kid stuff while leaning on the door to our parents' bedroom (no idea why). Suddenly he ran like an idiot, tripped, and bashed his head on the corner of my parents' bed's ...

graceylou replies on Sep 3, 2018:

@Marionville I’m used to it. I seem to be held responsible for everything even if I’m not even there or didn’t know it happened. My younger brother had a messy room when he lived at home with my parents and my mom would call me, who lived in the next province, telling me that that is my fault because I should tell my brother to clean his room. That’s the kind of family logic I’ve had to deal with. In a lot of Asian families, boys can do no wrong.

Do you "dress your age"?

genessa comments on Sep 3, 2018:

Funny you should ask that -- funny to me, anyway -- because just the other day i was thinking about my decade in japan, and something one of my students said about my habitual attire. since i was a teacher, i was expected not to wear jeans, which would've been comfy, so i dressed in highly ...

graceylou replies on Sep 3, 2018:

Definitely, dress in a way that is comfortable to you and in a style that you like that fits your personality, but still respecting a dress code if it's required. Age shouldn't matter. Most people who don't know me well would guess my age to be in the late 20s or early 30s though I'm much closer to 50. I'm also quite fit, not model type, but pretty good. My sis-in-law is just a year older. To my parents' fiftieth anniversary party, she dressed like a granny. I wore a little black dress with silver sparklies. But I could pull it off without looking like I tried to dress young. I did look like I was half her age. I would look odd in the very conservative pants she wore and her knit cardigan.

Do you "dress your age"?

demifeministgal comments on Sep 1, 2018:

I don't think I dress my age. I dress rather conservatively and covered up. So very rarely can you see skin or even curves if I am wearing loose jeans or dress pants. So because I do not dress like a scantily clad sex worker and do not "flaunt it" people assume I dress older or younger than I ...

graceylou replies on Sep 3, 2018:

You dress however you like, but just because others want to show skin doesn't mean they are dressing like sex workers and want attention from perverts and creepers. The word "conservative" isn't even in my vocabulary.

I have morals and not into just sex or a hook up as some have put it.

OlderMusicGeek comments on Sep 2, 2018:

And why are people who are okay with just sex immoral?

graceylou replies on Sep 2, 2018:

That was my thought too.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Arouet comments on Sep 2, 2018:

One learns something every day. I didn't realise that there is a 'Here for Community' button. This site is laid out as a dating site and often it is hard to answer the questions outside of that context.

graceylou replies on Sep 2, 2018:

It’s a discussion site with a dating option added because people wanted that. Many of us are interested in the discussion and community only. Or at least not interested in dating.

Anyone heard of Tarkan?

LB67 comments on Sep 1, 2018:

I love Turkish pop/ Arabic dance music as well. I enjoy Tarkan’s music. Glad to hear this again. Happy music.There are some wonderful Turkish movies on YouTube, as well, It is an interesting culture.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@LB67 Awesome. And I’m nowhere near close to being Arabic, Egyptian, Lebanese, or Turkish. LOL.

Anyone heard of Tarkan?

LB67 comments on Sep 1, 2018:

I love Turkish pop/ Arabic dance music as well. I enjoy Tarkan’s music. Glad to hear this again. Happy music.There are some wonderful Turkish movies on YouTube, as well, It is an interesting culture.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@LB67 I love Turkish bellydance (and Lebanese) and want to learn more. So much fun.

Anyone heard of Tarkan?

LB67 comments on Sep 1, 2018:

I love Turkish pop/ Arabic dance music as well. I enjoy Tarkan’s music. Glad to hear this again. Happy music.There are some wonderful Turkish movies on YouTube, as well, It is an interesting culture.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

I danced to this song at a performance once (and playing zills as well). It wasn't my choreography, however, and I could have made it a more sultry piece if I were to have choreographed it. I love Arabic pop too!!!

Morten Harket, Norwegian Superstar!.

graceylou comments on Sep 1, 2018:

He hasn’t toured Canada either that I know of. At least not more recently. I can only wish.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@Marionville That is too funny.

Morten Harket, Norwegian Superstar!.

graceylou comments on Sep 1, 2018:

He hasn’t toured Canada either that I know of. At least not more recently. I can only wish.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@LB67 Vancouver is too crowded and depressing, and insanely expensive to live in. As soon as I get to the airport I want to go home. LOL. I was there last June and refused to stay more than 4 days. I love my almost 20 acres of open country living not too far from civilization but far enough.

Morten Harket, Norwegian Superstar!.

graceylou comments on Sep 1, 2018:

He hasn’t toured Canada either that I know of. At least not more recently. I can only wish.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@Marionville, the Rockies are beautiful though I prefer the Jasper area to Banff. I used to live in the Vancouver area and also lived in Kamloops for a bit.

Morten Harket, Norwegian Superstar!.

graceylou comments on Sep 1, 2018:

He hasn’t toured Canada either that I know of. At least not more recently. I can only wish.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@LB67 I was raised in the Vancouver area. Beautiful place yes but now I hate that place. LOL. I hate going back there to see my family.

I've noticed that some people may be curious or confused about a healthy D/s dynamic.

Snickers77 comments on Sep 1, 2018:

I am very open-minded and try to understand all I can. However, it escapes me the whole D/S scene. I am too much of a control freak to allow myself to be so dominated and yet I can't see myself as the dominator. Human sexuality is a complex subject. I'd like to understand the appeal of being either ...

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@coralisthree Great post, coral. And excellent responses. I very much enjoy the submissive position in a D/s relationship although in everyday life I'm a very dominant individual. And you are so right. I too am always in control despite assuming the bottom position. It is MY choice to give my submission to a particular Dominant to begin with. It gives me much pleasure and joy, and arousal, to place myself in this position to the right person. I don't expect everyone to share or understand those sentiments and reactions.

It's Saturday everyone, what you guys doing tonight?

graceylou comments on Sep 1, 2018:

Same thing I do everyday. Work.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@Sticks48 You might find her in New Orleans one of these days.

It's Saturday everyone, what you guys doing tonight?

graceylou comments on Sep 1, 2018:

Same thing I do everyday. Work.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@Sticks48 She’s a slavedriver.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

CalvinJoe comments on Sep 1, 2018:

Men are horny assholes

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@CalvinJoe I think some people are genuinely looking for a life partner. I am not it!!!

It's Saturday everyone, what you guys doing tonight?

graceylou comments on Sep 1, 2018:

Same thing I do everyday. Work.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@Sticks48 Since I own my own business I'm working all the time. I feed, I clean, I do dishes, I let dogs out, I pick up after them, I deal with phones, I deal with customers, I maintain the social media pages and websites, I keep the books, I file taxes, plus I take care of my own household needs. And it's a 24/7 business so I can be required to work any time of the day, week, month, year. My boss is a real bitch.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

CalvinJoe comments on Sep 1, 2018:

Men are horny assholes

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

I don't mind horny men at all. It's the ones wanting a long term monogamous relationship with me that are the problem. LOL.

It's Saturday everyone, what you guys doing tonight?

graceylou comments on Sep 1, 2018:

Same thing I do everyday. Work.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@Sticks48 Nope

Winter warning . … maybe

graceylou comments on Sep 1, 2018:

I could’ve predicted that. Would it be any different any year?

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@Sticks48 We just get used to it. It's the same every year.

Winter warning . … maybe

graceylou comments on Sep 1, 2018:

I could’ve predicted that. Would it be any different any year?

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@Sticks48 Usually it's only in the -20s and -30s though.

Winter warning . … maybe

graceylou comments on Sep 1, 2018:

I could’ve predicted that. Would it be any different any year?

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@Sticks48 So far, -58C.

Morten Harket, Norwegian Superstar!.

graceylou comments on Sep 1, 2018:

He hasn’t toured Canada either that I know of. At least not more recently. I can only wish.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@Marionville Edmonton area, Alberta.

Morten Harket, Norwegian Superstar!.

graceylou comments on Sep 1, 2018:

He hasn’t toured Canada either that I know of. At least not more recently. I can only wish.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@Marionville Sometimes big names might do Toronto or some other place in the east. Unfortunately, if they have few Canadian dates they tend to skip my city.

Morten Harket, Norwegian Superstar!.

graceylou comments on Sep 1, 2018:

He hasn’t toured Canada either that I know of. At least not more recently. I can only wish.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@Marionville I never heard of even a-ha touring here (or at least not where I am) or I would be all over it.

Fanatics I need your help! My new rescue kitty Rigby is giving me trouble.

graceylou comments on Aug 31, 2018:

My groomer does nail trims for $10-15 (and that's Canadian!!!). It might be worth it to save you time and grief, and possible injuries to both parties. For some cats, putting a cloth over their heads (over, not wrapped) might calm them.

graceylou replies on Sep 1, 2018:

@Sticks48 They have this giant hamster ball looking thing that they put on the cat’s head when grooming. It’s more for cats that bite. Groomers can’t risk having their hands injured because they work with their hands.

I see lots of people talk about not liking being alone.

graceylou comments on Aug 29, 2018:

I love being alone too. On occasion I might spend time with others but I enjoy my alone time. I like going shopping alone, and I prefer traveling alone. I don’t have to wait for others, I can go at my pace, I don’t have to do things I don’t want to do.

graceylou replies on Aug 31, 2018:

@Sticks48 there are advantages to going alone and those for going with others. Alone I avoid being out at night especially late. It’s much safer to do with others.

Fanatics I need your help! My new rescue kitty Rigby is giving me trouble.

graceylou comments on Aug 31, 2018:

My groomer does nail trims for $10-15 (and that's Canadian!!!). It might be worth it to save you time and grief, and possible injuries to both parties. For some cats, putting a cloth over their heads (over, not wrapped) might calm them.

graceylou replies on Aug 31, 2018:

@Sticks48 I’ve known a number of groomers where I used to work. I’ve also had to medicate and give injections to cats. We kinda develop a bunch of tricks.

I thought I'd share this with my dirty minded kin folk

graceylou comments on Aug 31, 2018:

My neighbour’s house is a mile away. But their cows are close by. Will they do?

graceylou replies on Aug 31, 2018:

@Fibonacci1618 Well, I actually do have a donkey.

I thought I'd share this with my dirty minded kin folk

graceylou comments on Aug 31, 2018:

My neighbour’s house is a mile away. But their cows are close by. Will they do?

graceylou replies on Aug 31, 2018:

@Fibonacci1618 You get no privacy with cows around. Or with my ass around. And by that I mean my donkey (who is probably louder than me).

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

TX77550 comments on Aug 30, 2018:

If you are not here for dating kindly and politeness i Deliverance of rejection is the only compassionate response. Also early delivery to avoid attachment syndrome.

graceylou replies on Aug 30, 2018:

I’m kind and polite but when they get aggressive I don’t stay nice too long. And if they are a believer they get what they deserve.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Bigwavedave comments on Aug 30, 2018:

What ... stop say what. He prayed for you? Well thats a funny turn.

graceylou replies on Aug 30, 2018:

@Bigwavedave he did yes. And he said he believes in God. I asked what he was doing here.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

AtheistReader comments on Aug 30, 2018:

I think it is how this site is advertised. It said that it was a "dating" site, and when I got here it seemed that is a bit inaccurate. :) This looks more like a forum, which is fine, and if forum members start dating, that's bonus, right.

graceylou replies on Aug 30, 2018:

It’s advertised for dating and for community. People are free not to participate in the dating component. Anyone can easily see if someone is here for community by hovering or visiting their profile.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

TX77550 comments on Aug 30, 2018:

What do you expect when posting on a dating site? People here are interested in finding a real person. To act so haughty is simply bullying men.

graceylou replies on Aug 30, 2018:

It’s a community site that added a dating component at some point. This isn’t a dating site exclusively. A lot of us are here for other purposes.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Bigwavedave comments on Aug 30, 2018:

What ... stop say what. He prayed for you? Well thats a funny turn.

graceylou replies on Aug 30, 2018:

Maybe not for me specifically.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Aquaeyes comments on Aug 30, 2018:

I laughed when I read this. I just visited a page where a woman said she was only here for community then said she liked to be spanked and has always wanted to have sex in a beetle. Some pretty mixed signals. I think your dilemma is not unique to this site. As a man it is always a little confusing ...

graceylou replies on Aug 30, 2018:

@Aquaeyes Wow that is crazy. I talk to everyone here, except the believers. I presume people know to check my profile and look at what I'm here for. Most are very courteous and would ask me first if I would be interested in chatting about certain more "involved" topics. And usually I have no problem, and it's a lot of fun. I do appreciate the majority of the members here.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Mooolah comments on Aug 29, 2018:

Post a pretty thumbnail & that will happen.

graceylou replies on Aug 30, 2018:

That would be like saying if I wear a short skirt I want to be hit on. It’s a picture of me. I can’t be anyone else. I don’t have another face.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

marksam8484 comments on Aug 30, 2018:

I my self am here for both community and the possibility of meeting a like minded, non-delusional individual. Sorry that you have to suffer with individuals who are to lazy to take the time to read your profile. The first thing I do when I see someone I am possibly interested in is read their ...

graceylou replies on Aug 30, 2018:

And you can get a quick summary right at the top of the profile right? Are they interested in dating, dating whom? Are they here just for community? It’s right at the top with the picture. You don’t even have to read the whole biography.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Aquaeyes comments on Aug 30, 2018:

I laughed when I read this. I just visited a page where a woman said she was only here for community then said she liked to be spanked and has always wanted to have sex in a beetle. Some pretty mixed signals. I think your dilemma is not unique to this site. As a man it is always a little confusing ...

graceylou replies on Aug 30, 2018:

My issue is not that I have a problem with being hit on. I don’t have a problem with people who want to chat, flirt, play (I will leave that undefined), whatever. It’s the guys who out of nowhere get serious and desperate, and aggressive when I explain that I’m not here for dating and I’m not looking. I’m pretty easy going and I’m not easily offended by men sending me messages that are a bit risqué or even pics. I get that a lot of people here feel lonely and are really looking for a life companion but getting angry and aggressive at someone who tells them she’s not likely to be what they’re looking for is not acceptable.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Mikeb56 comments on Aug 28, 2018:

I will visit profiles generally as a result of a like or a comment. People visit mine as well. I have sent some messages to a couple of people and have had some wonderful conversations. If I am going to be out and about I have announced that usually If anybody wants to hang out for a bit. I may ask ...

graceylou replies on Aug 29, 2018:

@Mikeb56 I’ve done both but would definitely want to do more of those.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

UrsiMajor comments on Aug 29, 2018:

If you want guys to stop hitting on you, change your profile pic to something hideous - like Church Lady. I'm surprised anyone is talking to me at this point.

graceylou replies on Aug 29, 2018:

Yeah. I’m not going to make changes for or because of other people.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Howitstarts23 comments on Aug 29, 2018:

Playing hard to get eh? Just kidding, that must cheapen an otherwise great site

graceylou replies on Aug 29, 2018:

Yeah, I'm really really into believers and I'm just here to get my rocks off with folks from the dark side.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

maxhyde comments on Aug 29, 2018:

Ha. I guess I obviously can't speak for everyone but yes. Of course I actually don't really view this as a dating site either. Sorry about your unfortunate need to block people but do what you must to make it enjoyable for you. That should be all that counts

graceylou replies on Aug 29, 2018:

@maxhyde If they are aggressive enough we can always flag or report them. I reported a post last night that suggested violence.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Stepmomofdragons comments on Aug 29, 2018:

Must be nice to even get messages, because no one says anything to me.

graceylou replies on Aug 29, 2018:

You do not want some of these messages some men send, trust me. But you're gorgeous. A lot of people are missing out if they don't try to chat with you.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

maxhyde comments on Aug 29, 2018:

Ha. I guess I obviously can't speak for everyone but yes. Of course I actually don't really view this as a dating site either. Sorry about your unfortunate need to block people but do what you must to make it enjoyable for you. That should be all that counts

graceylou replies on Aug 29, 2018:

Most people are nice enough to back off the dating interests when I explain to them why I'm here. It's just the few who get angry and aggressive that I have a real issue with. And the believers. Why are they even here?

Ever spent time around someone who was a perfectionist?

graceylou comments on Aug 28, 2018:

Spent my whole entire life with one. Me. It can be excruciating. Stressful. Everything takes so long to do or it never gets done because it’s not perfect. My parents are perfectionists so I grew up expected to be perfect and was always criticized or humiliated for not being perfect. I never did ...

graceylou replies on Aug 29, 2018:

@Sticks48 Not well but at the same time they make me learn that imperfection is ok.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

CaroleKay comments on Aug 29, 2018:

♥ I have a rant post similar to yours. Lol! A lot of guys don't care what you want or what's in your profile. I sometimes block someone every time I log in. Believers are the worst and you should report them. What makes it worthwhile is once you get the losers blocked and out of the way. You get ...

graceylou replies on Aug 29, 2018:

Most people are great. I don’t have too many blocked. If I can politely explain that I’m not looking to date I would choose that. If they bring out god or get aggressive they are gone.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Shelton comments on Aug 29, 2018:

I think he is a troll in Nigeria that doesn't know the definition of agnostic or here for community. Block him.

graceylou replies on Aug 29, 2018:

Possibly. But who knows. The god thing was enough for a block.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

escapetypist comments on Aug 28, 2018:

I am here for community with benefits

graceylou replies on Aug 28, 2018:

That’s awesome.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

David1955 comments on Aug 28, 2018:

I've always had the view that 'here for community' just means not actively looking for "love" or whatever, but that doesn't exclude making friends or connections with others. I think it would be mistake to assume that here for community-ers are secretly looking for a relationship or some affair of ...

graceylou replies on Aug 28, 2018:

Exactly. And people can choose whichever option they like without judgement from others or assumptions. Most people are great whatever they choose. Some people though....

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Mikeb56 comments on Aug 28, 2018:

I will visit profiles generally as a result of a like or a comment. People visit mine as well. I have sent some messages to a couple of people and have had some wonderful conversations. If I am going to be out and about I have announced that usually If anybody wants to hang out for a bit. I may ask ...

graceylou replies on Aug 28, 2018:

May be I won’t ever go fishing in the ocean but I might go whale watching or swim with sharks.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Lisl comments on Aug 28, 2018:

Gross. I posted the other day about my experience here, but the guy wasn't a creeper about it. He said he was open to dating and relocation and I got sucked into that bullshit. We started out as friends talking and got attracted intellectually. Then we decided to meet and that's when problems ...

graceylou replies on Aug 28, 2018:

I saw that. Sorry that happened to you.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

BlueWave comments on Aug 28, 2018:

There was a post earlier today that I am guessing was talking about the same person. Apparently, he has said that exact thing to several women on this site. I doubt he will be here much longer. He definitely wouldn’t be here if people reported and/or blocked. My profile is pretty clear about my...

graceylou replies on Aug 28, 2018:

@BlueWave yup. Likely same guy.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

BlueWave comments on Aug 28, 2018:

There was a post earlier today that I am guessing was talking about the same person. Apparently, he has said that exact thing to several women on this site. I doubt he will be here much longer. He definitely wouldn’t be here if people reported and/or blocked. My profile is pretty clear about my...

graceylou replies on Aug 28, 2018:

@BlueWave hmm. I don’t think it was. I think it started with a K.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

BlueWave comments on Aug 28, 2018:

There was a post earlier today that I am guessing was talking about the same person. Apparently, he has said that exact thing to several women on this site. I doubt he will be here much longer. He definitely wouldn’t be here if people reported and/or blocked. My profile is pretty clear about my...

graceylou replies on Aug 28, 2018:

I will try to look for that earlier post to see if that might be from the same guy. Then the person might need to get reported.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Piece2YourPuzzle comments on Aug 28, 2018:

What about one night stands or flings? Lol

graceylou replies on Aug 28, 2018:

I don’t think so.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Charity comments on Aug 28, 2018:

I get the aggravation, most of my time on this app has been for community only. And still, I've had dumb asses with whom I've had little to no communication with on this site come on strong with their very first message to me. Even if I were open to dating, I still don't think it's smart to ...

graceylou replies on Aug 28, 2018:

@Charity I try to be nice and talk to them then later on they tell me I wasted their time. Oh well. Can’t win.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

Charity comments on Aug 28, 2018:

I get the aggravation, most of my time on this app has been for community only. And still, I've had dumb asses with whom I've had little to no communication with on this site come on strong with their very first message to me. Even if I were open to dating, I still don't think it's smart to ...

graceylou replies on Aug 28, 2018:

Right?

CHOICES LIMIT US Every time we make a choice, we're giving up the other choices.

graceylou comments on Aug 28, 2018:

I own a standard donkey and two Arabian horses. My donkey is very easy to care for compared to my horses. She does have a tendency to break out of the fencing but she's easy to catch as she's like a dog and wants to be with people. She's easy with hoof trims, unlike my crazy horses. She can be ...

graceylou replies on Aug 28, 2018:

@birdingnut No. I don’t ride my donkey. I don’t know anyone who does either. I don’t ride my horses either though. Most people here have donkeys for protection from predators, mostly coyotes. My donkey protects my equine herd although generally single coyotes won’t attack a horse.

Do people take "Here for community" seriously?

AMGT comments on Aug 28, 2018:

“I got messages from someone telling me I'm a beautiful angel and exactly what he prayed to God for!!!!!“ How would you have reacted to this if it happened face to face in public?

graceylou replies on Aug 28, 2018:

I have had someone driving past me on the street and he went around the corner and parked. He then came towards me as I walked closer to the corner. He said he would never forgive himself if he didn’t try to get to know me. Uuuummmm. Whaaaaa? At the very least he didn’t know anything about me and didn’t have a profile to look at. I just told him I wasn’t available though it took awhile to have that really sink in.