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Which emotion is your greatest asset?
William_Mary comments on Feb 8, 2018:
My abrupt outburst. I call it passion. Especially happens when I'm working on one of my bikes or switching out the mower deck to the snow blade, and vice versa, on the John Deere. I have no patience for the mechanical aspects of life when it comes to especially tight areas with my big hands and ...
paul1967 replies on Feb 8, 2018:
But we know inside our ladies are laughing at us just a little.
The afterlife is such a bizarre concept.
AxeElf comments on Feb 7, 2018:
I believe that an afterlife is probable because I believe that God exists. I believe that God exists because of my personal experiences and the experiences of people I trust. (Obviously, my reasons for belief apply only to myself, and are not intended to be the reasons for anyone else's belief.)
paul1967 replies on Feb 8, 2018:
@AxeElf My intent is not to be rude but to debate the merit of your rationale for your belief. Faith is, in my opinion, a terrible, useless and damaging concept. It gives one the idea that accepting anything without evidence is a rational and acceptable thing to do. It's not sensible nor agreeable, and it's allowing you and others to accept a dogma that influences your life. It's telling you that this life is just a test for the life to come. People who allow their lives to be lead by faith live their only life for the promise of a next life, which will in all likelihood never come. I find that troublesome and irresponsible because the decision you're making not only affect the choices you make in your life, but it changes, the world I live in, and in a negative way. People who are willing to believe in a God are far more likely to reject global warming, far more likely to deny medical research, far more likely to pray for help and far less likely to do the things that make help possible. You asked, "How many omnipotent beings can logically, possibly exist?" None logically exists and logically exist is different than possibly exists. The question, could purple pigs logically exist on the moon? It is not enough that the question is askable for there to be a logical foundation to believe they do exist. Why? There is no evidence, and there is no known requirement that would necessitate that they do exist. Is it "possible" that purple pigs live on the moon? Yes. Is it "logical" that purple pigs live on the moon? No. The same is true for God. I could have faith that purple pigs live on the moon and that's what you do with God. Regarding Hell, The statement you made about Hell is yet another faith-based position. You accept what you have been taught while others have faith that you're wrong and that I will be joining the devil in hell. This should clarify to you why faith is the worst means to judge the truth of any claim. Let the evidence be your guide and throw faith to the wind. If a God exists that would throw you away and destroy you for not believing in him then let it be so, don't worship that monster.
Which emotion is your greatest asset?
icolan comments on Feb 7, 2018:
Emotions only guide our decision making process when we allow them to. We are fully capable of making decisions based on logic.
paul1967 replies on Feb 8, 2018:
I respect you, but I think you underestimate the subtlety of emotions and the role it plays in all decisions. We are an emotional species we couldn't function well if we were capable of pure emotionless logic. Any decision we make has an emotional attachment to it.
Which emotion is your greatest asset?
TerriCity comments on Feb 7, 2018:
Emotion has often been an obstacle to my feeling successful at work and in relationships as I have had depression most of my life. It seems like I feel many things too deeply, but that can often be a gift as well.
paul1967 replies on Feb 8, 2018:
I don't know if this will help or pertains to you, but this is something I read that hit home for me. When we feel negative emotions, it’s a message that what we are currently doing is not working. It could be the way we perceive the situation, or it could be the situation itself. If we cannot change our perception, then we will naturally move away from the painful emotions that we have linked to that situation. When we feel positive emotions it’s a message that what we are currently doing is probably something we should move toward or cultivate.
The afterlife is such a bizarre concept.
walklightly comments on Feb 7, 2018:
i believe nothing. it is possible that there is a transference of life energy into the next existence, & so on, but i have no evidence of energy surviving physical death (except for two separate experiences were this seemed to be the case). i live this moment, which more than suffices.
paul1967 replies on Feb 8, 2018:
I agree it's something that until we can investigate we are best admitting it's an unknown and then existing as if we only get this one life. If it turns out after we die we live again we get a bonus and if not, at least we didn't waste our lives living for a life that never came.
Which is your favorite black mirror episode?
paul1967 comments on Feb 7, 2018:
I've never heard of the black mirror.
paul1967 replies on Feb 8, 2018:
@Michaelx7 I did it was a Star Trekish episode. I am hooked.
The afterlife is such a bizarre concept.
AxeElf comments on Feb 7, 2018:
I believe that an afterlife is probable because I believe that God exists. I believe that God exists because of my personal experiences and the experiences of people I trust. (Obviously, my reasons for belief apply only to myself, and are not intended to be the reasons for anyone else's belief.)
paul1967 replies on Feb 8, 2018:
It's possible that you're personal experience is a valid reason for your beliefs. I've heard you say it before and you have acknowledged that it serves no purpose beyond your purpose. I suspect that you have convinced yourself as have the others that the evidence you seem to believe is solid enough proof to justify your acceptance of this one particular God Yahweh. I would only say that if I were offered this same particular form of unsharable and unexaminable evidence, I would be more inclined to reject it as delusional. I would recognize the self-serving aspect of my personal imagined God who picks me, and a select group to hold the wisdom of his divine existence. I would also recognize that other people from other cultures claim the same evidence about an entirely different God and this would cause me considerable doubt. I know that this intangible evidence of a God is more likely my mind searching for an answer that I have no means of answering. This trust you place on this personal testimony of things you think are real is not rational and is highly likely to be of your minds creation than an actual God. I know you well enough to know you will reject this, but I share it with you anyways in the hope that you might one day think to yourself that your living this one life, your only life accepting something that is at best a flimsy reason for believing something so significant. If your God doesn't get that and punishes you for all eternity, he is a monster not worthy of worship.
Which emotion is your greatest asset?
wordywalt comments on Feb 7, 2018:
You overestimate the role of emotions. If we are truly intelligent people, our greatest asset is the ability to derive meaning from experience and learning -- the ability to build and use patterns of meaning which we cab use to interpret and respond effectively to the world we encounter. Emotions ...
paul1967 replies on Feb 7, 2018:
I disagree with respect. If I understand you correctly, you're saying that a higher form of meaning is found when we place, experience and learning before emotions. I would argue that there is no meaning without emotion and being driven to achieve these things only happens through emotion. If I have misunderstood you or if you think I'm incorrect, please explain. I would be interested in seeing your logic.
Which emotion is your greatest asset?
AnneWimsey comments on Feb 7, 2018:
Empathy and anger...i feel others distress & anger makes me try & do something about it.
paul1967 replies on Feb 7, 2018:
I'm pleasantly surprised to see someone recognize anger in a positive light. I think most people view anger as a negative emotion, and it can be, but it doesn't have to be. I encourage it when it's under control as a very positive motivator. It's motivated me more than most other emotions
Which is your favorite black mirror episode?
paul1967 comments on Feb 7, 2018:
I've never heard of the black mirror.
paul1967 replies on Feb 7, 2018:
@LucifersPen thank you I'll check it out
What would make you believe in a God?
Mooolah comments on Feb 7, 2018:
First god would have to perform a miracle. Like getting those Trumpty Dumpty voters to admit their egregious error in casting that vote. Then god would have to eliminate suffering. Then god would have to reduce overpopulation of the "virus with shoes." Then god would have to make me a nice lady.
paul1967 replies on Feb 7, 2018:
LMAO those would be an indication that a miracle did happen, all except making you a nice lady, that I'm sure you already are.
[youtube.com] & here's another atheist lullaby, sweets :)
paul1967 comments on Feb 6, 2018:
Logic DUSTY! I like Dusty I really do but this last election allowed me to see him for who he is. A flawed thinking human just like the rest of us. I know Dusty would agree and take no offense. That's what I like about him.
paul1967 replies on Feb 7, 2018:
@walklightly So true.
What are your thoughts on Secular Pro-Life?
Hellbent comments on Oct 20, 2017:
I don't like the terms "pro life" or "pro choice": they are both tendentious propaganda slogans. I would prefer it if people who disapproved of abortion were, in general, also those who disapproved of the death penalty - but they're not. I would prefer it if those who approve of abortion were, in ...
paul1967 replies on Feb 7, 2018:
@Hellbent I think you said it much better, by adding to it. That topic would make an interesting post. I would like to see if people recognize their lack of the willingness to practice this in themselves. I view myself as having some capacity for reflection, inquiry, self-analysis and a readiness to concede. I also recognize through reading some of my old post where I failed to do that. I think it's a mental muscle that we all need to try and flex more often. I often think of my high school chemistry professor who said the greatest among us are just as excited to find out that we are wrong as we are when we find out we are right. The meaning behind that to me was, in either case, we still advanced our understanding.
Should religion be taught in schools?
MARDUK comments on Feb 7, 2018:
No
paul1967 replies on Feb 7, 2018:
What about theology, can you see any value in that? A solid understanding of the religions of the world can be an essential tool in the better understanding of the literature of the world.
The afterlife is such a bizarre concept.
Skyfacer comments on Feb 7, 2018:
The more you think about it the more irrational the whole idea becomes. Do you go straight to a 'better place' or does you 'soul' 'sleep' in the grave until the 'resurrection' ? Perhaps you are reborn as another person ? The whole idea is ridiculous the more you try and reason it out. It seems that ...
paul1967 replies on Feb 7, 2018:
You touched on reincarnation which is of particular interest to me. If I'm remade into another being, but I don't retain any knowledge of my past self, how is that previous life any more meaningful than being dead without having been reincarnated?
What are your thoughts on Secular Pro-Life?
Hellbent comments on Oct 20, 2017:
I don't like the terms "pro life" or "pro choice": they are both tendentious propaganda slogans. I would prefer it if people who disapproved of abortion were, in general, also those who disapproved of the death penalty - but they're not. I would prefer it if those who approve of abortion were, in ...
paul1967 replies on Feb 7, 2018:
@Hellbent You spoke of something I feel very strongly about, and I want to get your input. What you said is correct, and I value this group of people. We have a diverse community of like-minded people on a single subject, "Does God exist?" and we discuss the difference in the degree to which we say I don't believe in a God. A healthy percentage of our community are keen and competent listeners, which is an essential trait for anyone that is engaged in understanding anything. There are, however, two things I do find troubling, which are closely related. The first is how many people in our community just want to be heard and recognized. I don't mean it in a disrespectful way, but I do regard it as something we as a group need to strive to avoid. I want individuals to say what they want to say, and then I want everyone else to take a minute and think to themselves, do I comprehend the message before they respond. If we fail to take the time to understand the only thing we've accomplished is adding frustration and resentment in the community. The other concern I have is a willingness of many to follow the consciences opinion without taking the time to understand fully what the opposing point is saying. I think we should take a few minutes before we respond to do some research before arriving at a decision, and then see if there is any common ground.
[youtube.com] & here's another atheist lullaby, sweets :)
paul1967 comments on Feb 6, 2018:
Logic DUSTY! I like Dusty I really do but this last election allowed me to see him for who he is. A flawed thinking human just like the rest of us. I know Dusty would agree and take no offense. That's what I like about him.
paul1967 replies on Feb 7, 2018:
@walklightly His youtube show is called "The Cult of Dusty" I sent you a link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Ti0AnNHIwk
Why do religious organizations get away with not paying taxes or even need to open their books?
Annaleda comments on Dec 13, 2017:
It is disgusting what religion gets away with. https://www.premierchristianity.com/Blog/Should-churches-pay-tax
paul1967 replies on Feb 7, 2018:
It's something that would require an influential politician to take a stand, and I think it will happen someday but not anytime soon.
Truth be told.. can you tell the difference..
paul1967 comments on Feb 6, 2018:
@mistymoon you know I have a lot of respect for you and I value your post. I know your intent was good, but this post is misleading and unfair in my opinion. Not all conservatives and not all Muslims buy into all or any of those listed, and much of what is contained here is misleading ...
paul1967 replies on Feb 6, 2018:
@mistymoon77 fair enough
What are your thoughts on Secular Pro-Life?
Hellbent comments on Oct 20, 2017:
I don't like the terms "pro life" or "pro choice": they are both tendentious propaganda slogans. I would prefer it if people who disapproved of abortion were, in general, also those who disapproved of the death penalty - but they're not. I would prefer it if those who approve of abortion were, in ...
paul1967 replies on Feb 6, 2018:
I enjoyed reading that well thought out and convincing post. That was an impressive piece of commentary that organized what many of us were thinking but didn't articulate as well as you did.
Are you an open or closet agnostic/atheist, and why?
paul1967 comments on Sep 26, 2017:
Loud and proud. I get nasty looks from people when I walk around with my I DON"T BELIEVE IN GOD! T-shirt. I get stopped from time to time and asked, why do you advertise my Atheism, it's obnoxious. You got to love how hypocritical they are, and it's a little sad they can't see it. I had one person ...
paul1967 replies on Feb 6, 2018:
@tonia I can say that I respect you for being smart and not risking your life. You are far too valuable to risk having some idiot come along and kill you for wearing a t-shirt. You have my respect.
Today - as every monday - I am fasting.
paul1967 comments on Feb 5, 2018:
I have been working hard for the last six months dropping from 277 lbs down to 215 lbs. My goal is 175 which is were I have always been before I gained my depression wait. I rarely workout but I have gone back to drinking loads of water and healthier food.
paul1967 replies on Feb 6, 2018:
@HippieChick58 @walklightly Thank you, both and walklightly, I have no doubt you can drop 5 kilos, but I will say this in a non-flirty way, you look amazing just the way you are.
Should religion be taught in schools?
Bloodypeace comments on Feb 6, 2018:
I think theology can be offered as a separate class that students may choose. I also believe that religion and its effects on human/societal development should be taught in history, sociology and psychology classes.
paul1967 replies on Feb 6, 2018:
I absolutely 100% agree. I took theology in school, and I was raised by an atheist father and a non-religious mother who encouraged me to take that class, it was neither pro-religion nor anti-religion. All it did was talk about the religions of the world, it's a class I would recommend all kids take.
Truth be told.. can you tell the difference..
paul1967 comments on Feb 6, 2018:
@mistymoon you know I have a lot of respect for you and I value your post. I know your intent was good, but this post is misleading and unfair in my opinion. Not all conservatives and not all Muslims buy into all or any of those listed, and much of what is contained here is misleading ...
paul1967 replies on Feb 6, 2018:
@mistymoon77 I hear you but look at some of the posts that praise this post. They're all taking you very seriously. It's as Jacques Abbadie once said, "One can fool some men, or fool all men in some places and times, but one cannot fool all men in all places and ages." And non-believers are no different.
Epistemolgy is the study of what we can know to be factual.
AxeElf comments on Jan 27, 2018:
All facts are based in faith.
paul1967 replies on Feb 5, 2018:
@AxeElf If you want to say that one penny is equal to a dollars by redefining what each of those things is, you can make that statement supportable. The modern form of apologetics is at its core, a think tank geared toward redefining facts to offer reasons for distrusting science whenever science shows people facts that conflict with a spiritual belief system. An aspect to this is to wedge doubt in all things science in every inconspicuous way possible. Or if it can't provide distrust due to the overwhelming evidence, it's backup is to find a way to alter the meaning of scripture to fit the science. A declaration is as true or false as to one's definition of a word. God created the Heavens and the Earth in 6 days. Overwhelming evidence shows this not to be true. Apologetic think tank comes to the rescue: First, add doubt; Radiometric dating is unreliable. Ok, that worked on some but not all so redefine and segment the belief. Young Earthers accepted doubt so there over here old Earthers will be over there with a redefined meaning; A day might be a week, a month, or millennia. You accept your belief in the statement "All facts are based on faith as a factual statement, but your faith in that position doesn't add credit to its validity nor have you demonstrated it to be accurate Remember ALL FACT are based on Faith this was your post. Your use of a mathematical abstract of two parallel lines does not fit the definition of faith. It allows for evidence, and it can be used reliably in the real world. The facts that surround it and work with it support its validity, and it is open to being disproven. Again how you define a thing is essential to assess its worth in reality. My definition of faith: An unaltering acceptance of any proposed idea based on zero supporting evidence. There is nothing in science that is unaltering; there is nothing in science that would stand on a foundation without a well thought and reasoned bases. If I am wrong, you should be able to give me example after example of science taking a fact-based position on faith pointing directly at the core of what it is that science accepts on faith. As in the statement, frozen water expands. This is a fact-based statement. It does not ask that you know the temperature of frozen water, nor does it ask for a tool to measure change from one state to another. If I said water freezes at 32' F, I would be making another fact-based statement. If you point to the instrument for taking the temperature as being the thing that we take on faith to be accurate, I will point out that it is not faith in the device or all the other instruments that gave the same result before it. Science would happily change its mind if you could demonstrate a rational argument that supports reality better than this ...
Epistemolgy is the study of what we can know to be factual.
AxeElf comments on Jan 27, 2018:
All facts are based in faith.
paul1967 replies on Feb 4, 2018:
@DwayneHicks What we know and don't know isn't the point of this. I agree what is unknown almost reaches 100% of what is knowable, but what we know with science has never been based on faith. We can be wrong about what we thought was accurate, and it still wasn't based on faith. I stopped responding to this thread because it turned into an excuse to believe anything based on faith propaganda campaign. I suspect that nonbelievers have done a fantastic job of demonstrating how useless faith actually is and the apologists are doing what they do best; muddying the water to justify faith as a means of knowing something. I suspect @AxeElf knows what he's doing and why he's doing it, he doesn't strike me as an unintelligent, blind fool. He strikes me as an apologist preaching passive Christianity. I support him being here because the willingness to be challenged is the cornerstone of science. It's why science has given us everything we have and religion just hasn't.
@BeeHappy posted a ten-minute video on the topic "The Bible Is Mostly Not Factual" in which a ...
paul1967 comments on Feb 1, 2018:
My question is more requisite than the point you're making. To be rational, we need reasonable evidence that the Bible holds the truth about the existence of its primary character, God. The Bible in itself isn't evidence of jack, and I find deeper meaning in many other publications that have nothing...
paul1967 replies on Feb 4, 2018:
@AxeElf That classification comes with a lot of baggage. Much you might reject, but being accepting of Christianity also means you allow for all the things Jesus taught to be true, which was the entirety of the Torah. This belief would include things we know are untrue, starting with Adam and Eve, the story of Noah, and then you need also to accept that God didn't condemn Slavery, abuse of women and that God interacted with humans in alarming ways.
@BeeHappy posted a ten-minute video on the topic "The Bible Is Mostly Not Factual" in which a ...
paul1967 comments on Feb 1, 2018:
My question is more requisite than the point you're making. To be rational, we need reasonable evidence that the Bible holds the truth about the existence of its primary character, God. The Bible in itself isn't evidence of jack, and I find deeper meaning in many other publications that have nothing...
paul1967 replies on Feb 4, 2018:
@AxeElf I respect your well-considered response. May I ask, do you consider yourself a Christian. I know you don't take every story in the Bible to be the word of God and that you believe much of what is written to be the creation of man's interpretation of Gods message, but given that is the fundamental narrative in the Bible something you follow?
@BeeHappy posted a ten-minute video on the topic "The Bible Is Mostly Not Factual" in which a ...
paul1967 comments on Feb 1, 2018:
My question is more requisite than the point you're making. To be rational, we need reasonable evidence that the Bible holds the truth about the existence of its primary character, God. The Bible in itself isn't evidence of jack, and I find deeper meaning in many other publications that have nothing...
paul1967 replies on Feb 3, 2018:
@AxeElf I have a question for you, and I respect that you may not want to share this information in a public forum so just disregard if that's the case, I'll take no offense. In your opinion is it more rational to accept that a physically undetectable and a completely unprovable, all powerful, all knowing, all loving, supernatural God is interacting with you and is the explanations for those experiences you had? Should you ever accept a supernatural cause? Shouldn't you exhaust all other nonsupernatural possibilities? If nothing else supports a natural claim and you have no access to the supernatural, isn't it a more rational position to say, I don't know what the cause of this event was and then wait for more evidence? For example, when I saw a UFO (Unidentified flying object) swerving up and down, right and left at incredible speeds and then split in two and fly out of sight, I said to myself; I don't know what that was, whatever it was, that was pretty cool. What I didn't do was say I saw an alien spacecraft. To this day I put the likelihood of extraterrestrial spacecraft as a far-fetched possibility.
@BeeHappy posted a ten-minute video on the topic "The Bible Is Mostly Not Factual" in which a ...
paul1967 comments on Feb 1, 2018:
My question is more requisite than the point you're making. To be rational, we need reasonable evidence that the Bible holds the truth about the existence of its primary character, God. The Bible in itself isn't evidence of jack, and I find deeper meaning in many other publications that have nothing...
paul1967 replies on Feb 2, 2018:
@AxeElf You are of course entitled to accept your private evidence of God although you might want to think about how much stock you put into that belief. Here the facts on personal evidence, it's not reliable, it's self-fulfilling. I want eternal life, I want an all-powerful all-loving force watching over me, I want help....oh I got help, I want love .... wow God loves me....I want hope.....Well guess what God gives me hope......I'm not feeling great but when I think of God I feel better.....I wanted all this and there it is, therefore God is real. Wow! it's all true God is in my life. I don't know what your proof is but this most of what I have heard from Christians. It's fine for them to accept this line of evidence, they won't get any disrespect from me. I'm only pointing out to you why personal evidence is bad evidence because you're posting your position. I will add that I am happy to see you here doing that too, you seem reasonable and I appreciate that.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
kmdskit3 comments on Jan 30, 2018:
Really liked the Attenborough and tree posts. Didn't have kids partly for environmental reasons but mostly because I recognized how fucked up I was and didn't want to pass that on like my parents passed it on to me. Lately have realized that I don't need children to pass on something of myself.
paul1967 replies on Jan 31, 2018:
That's one major reason I didn't want them.My three major reasons I didn't have kids are, first I'm just too damn selfish and second I'm too damn selfish and third I'm too damn selfish. The bonus reason is, I like spending money on things I want which makes me too damn selfish to have kids.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
GipsyOfNewSpain comments on Jan 30, 2018:
Your Choice. But your own flesh and bone one day will accomplish something that will make everything worthwhile. I am into dancing. My son finds it cool that he can go out to dance to a salsa club and if his parents are in town even if not together... his parents throw down in the dance floor too. ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 31, 2018:
@GipsyOfNewSpain Ah yeah I wasn't very clear. You said; "Your own flesh and bone one day will accomplish something that will make everything worthwhile." and I was saying yes they might, but they could also turn out to be a terrible person. I was being hyperbolic and not very clear when I said; "or maybe he/she will be the cause of the destruction of the universe." My point is that not everyone is built to parent and even if you are you can still have kids that don't function well in society. I'm not a bad guy, at least I don't think I am, but I'm a bit more selfish than a parent needs to be. I don't know if that would change if I ever had a child, but knowing myself the way I do, I wouldn't want to risk it. It wouldn't be fair to my potential son or daughter.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
Clare comments on Jan 30, 2018:
I have one son and that was it, I got my vasectomy back in the mid 80s to save my wife from a lifetime of misery with the problems she was having taking birth control pills. Those things really messed her system up. As far as kids go? They're okay, as long as they belong to someone else. As a ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 31, 2018:
LMAO yes, as long as I can send them home I enjoy having kids around from time to time.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
kiramea comments on Jan 30, 2018:
My oldest son and his wife have never wanted kids, besides my daughter-in-law has a disorder that having children could kill her. Even with that, no doctor in their bohunk Texas town would do a tubal on her. My youngest son really doesn't want children either. I have told all my children that I'm...
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
I agree with @RavenCT, but I would also bring a lawsuit against them. They can't deny you medical treatment in life-threatening situations like hers. Look up The Emergency Medical Treatment and Active Labor Act. It states; The Federal Emergency Medical Treatment and Active Labor Act (EMTALA), is part of the Consolidated Omnibus Reconciliation Act (COBRA). EMTALA.com offers a summary of its provisions. The Act applies to all hospitals in the United States and its territories. It sets out the laws governing facilities that provide emergency medical care. The EMTALA requires hospital E.R. staff to provide medical treatment to all people with real emergency medical conditions, regardless of the person’s ability to pay (or offer medical insurance). Illegal denial of treatment may subject the medical provider to disciplinary action. There is more to it than immediate medical emergencies. It extends to all the stuff she's dealing with and more.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
Rugglesby comments on Jan 30, 2018:
I never wanted kids, got married on condition of no kids, exs had a biological clock go off, and I agreed. Kids are the greatest thing that ever happened to me. I tried to have a vasectomy after my son was born, but as I was under 30 they refused. Since then it hasn't been necessary as any women I ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
@RavenCT I was ok with the therapy. I've been going since I was five years old, so it was old hat for me. The insanity was that they think it's ok to send me to war at 18 to kill people I have no issue with, but I need a year of therapy to get a vasectomy, and I told them that. All I got was a shoulder shrug which I found to be insulting.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
GipsyOfNewSpain comments on Jan 30, 2018:
Your Choice. But your own flesh and bone one day will accomplish something that will make everything worthwhile. I am into dancing. My son finds it cool that he can go out to dance to a salsa club and if his parents are in town even if not together... his parents throw down in the dance floor too. ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
@GipsyOfNewSpain I think you might have misunderstood me, I'm not critical of anyone who wants kids. I think it's great and probably very rewarding. Humankind will survive just fine with or without my offspring. I would protect that button (as you put it) with my life. I would freely sacrifice myself to protect the world from its demise. So I'm not clear on what you meant by that.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
Vic47 comments on Jan 30, 2018:
I work with children - that's enough. I enjoy working with kids but the joy is I can hand them back at the end of the day.
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
I use to many years ago, and it was rewarding and fun, but that never translated in my head to I want one for myself.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
twshield comments on Jan 30, 2018:
same for me. i am gay and its still possible but i am way too selfish and love nice things. those little people are too expensive!
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
That's so true and I'm with you on being way too selfish to sacrifice my life willingly or not to raise a child in a world full of unwanted children. Oh and being able to take a week off work climb aboard a plane and fly to some distant paradise Island out in the middle of nowhere is a perk I just can't,,,,wont give up.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
Rugglesby comments on Jan 30, 2018:
I never wanted kids, got married on condition of no kids, exs had a biological clock go off, and I agreed. Kids are the greatest thing that ever happened to me. I tried to have a vasectomy after my son was born, but as I was under 30 they refused. Since then it hasn't been necessary as any women I ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
Just to be clear for someone who might read this, they can't refuse but they can force you to have a year of therapy before they do it.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
PeppermintDreads comments on Jan 30, 2018:
I’ve never wanted kids, I can’t stand them. To me they are vile, disgusting, disease-riddled parasites. With that said, if I was ever forced into it, I’d adopt and I’d take the shelter dog approach about it...like dogs, there’s so many kids sitting in in foster homes, I’d adopt an older ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
I need to apologize, at first, I thought you meant you would kennel them like a dog, I thought this lady is freaking scary nuts!, but then you explained it, and I think to myself, yeah that makes sense, and I get her.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
wanderartist comments on Jan 30, 2018:
Right there with you. I never felt the urge to reproduce. I got a vasectomy a decade ago...then I married a woman with two kids. Go fig. I believe in nurture more than nature.
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
I'm involved and I will likely marry a woman with three kids, I think stepdad is something I can handle.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
Dida comments on Jan 30, 2018:
Is it weird that you never wanted children? NOPE! I think it is weird to live in a society that believes every single "unique" individual does want them. I cannot say if I missed out on not having one. Mine is an amazing person but I ave no way of knowing what my life would look like now had I not ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
You are the first parent I've ever met to word it in a way that makes sense. Smart people are so much more fun to talk to. To be clear, I'm not saying everyone else is dumb, but everyone else has said simple-minded things about parenting and how I should reconsider. People posting here seem to get it.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
loisgh61 comments on Jan 30, 2018:
No its not weird. I felt the same way and I still do. I'm past the point of being able to have them. Everyone said I'd regret this. They were wrong. I feel like I dodged a bullet.
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
LMFAO I heard those same exact words, and I feel the same way you do everytime I'm in a department store I thank that none existent God that I was spared the kid bullet.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
GipsyOfNewSpain comments on Jan 30, 2018:
Your Choice. But your own flesh and bone one day will accomplish something that will make everything worthwhile. I am into dancing. My son finds it cool that he can go out to dance to a salsa club and if his parents are in town even if not together... his parents throw down in the dance floor too. ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
You might be right, or maybe he/she will be the cause of the destruction of the universe. My point is this world is full of parents who had kids thinking they would grow up to be successful, independent, wonderful adults. I look around, and I don't see much of that. I will say that had no part in my decision not to have kids
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
Betty comments on Jan 30, 2018:
Not everyone wants or needs to be a parent. I suspect you may have been subjected to the stories of the wonders of parenthood and a lot of teasing. You made a choice that was good for you and you have no regrets so it was the right choice. Much respect. :)
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
Well the thing that did it for me is that my mother put a curse on me (being hyperbolic.) When I was about 16 my mother said, "Just wait, one day you will have a kid just like you and you will be in my shoes dealing with a person just the way you are now." She said that tongue and cheek and not in a mean way. I immediately said "Oh no I won't," She laughed thinking I was kidding but I was completely serious.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
LeighShelton comments on Jan 30, 2018:
no im 56 and haven't had any that I made. I don't think this is a great earth we are leaving kids to sort out.
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
Agreed, which is one reason of many for my decision not to have kids. I will say that it's a lesser reason, but still an important one.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
UrsiMajor comments on Jan 30, 2018:
Thanks so much for your post. I know exactly how you feel. Most people around me are having rivers of babies and sometimes I feel like a freak for having zero interest in kids. My marriage is ending because he thought I would change my mind.
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
It's funny you said that. Part of my reason for posting this is that I'm starting a serious relationship with someone who has three teen kids. Oh dear lord what have I done lol. I know for the first time in my life what it means to be "IN LOVE" a concept I always thought I understood, but I recognize now what the difference is between being in love and loving someone. With Christine, I am in love with her, I love her and like her, as my best friend, so there's no doubt she's worth it.
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
ReadyforaChange comments on Jan 30, 2018:
Not at all weird. What's weird is when people have babies because other people think they should.
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
Thank you! It's genuinely not that I don't like kids I just don't want the responsibility that NEEDS to be there when you make that commitment. I think it parenthood was forced on me I'd be a good father, but given the choice, I would rather be an excellent uncle
I never wanted to have kids, is that weird?
orange_girl comments on Jan 30, 2018:
I remember telling my mom I wasn't going to have kids when I was 12. Actually, I thought I was supposed to be a nun, because I knew I didn't want to have kids or to get married. I couldn't reconcile that with the fact that I didn't believe in god either, so I did not become a nun. Luckily, my ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 30, 2018:
LMAO, Those are the only type o kids I want.
Tattoos
RavenCT comments on Jan 29, 2018:
Also if you see someone with art you like on them? Ask! Seeing a finished product after healing is always good. - Remember to eat a good meal before you go for work. (Not kidding). I went hypoglycemic on my first tat. That wasn't embarrassing at all. - Be really sure this is the tat you want as ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 29, 2018:
Another good idea.
"Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man -- living in the sky -- who ...
jeffy comments on Jan 24, 2018:
It's programing. When people who want to control others establish a system from cradle to grave that requires the suspension of disbelief to earn eternal rewards - the believers become quite docile and easy to control - like a well planned cattle chute going into a slaughter house.
paul1967 replies on Jan 29, 2018:
If you could shorten that statement somehow, it would be a very useful meme.
"Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man -- living in the sky -- who ...
paul1967 comments on Jan 24, 2018:
I loved George on religion because he makes it so clear that religion is "Bullshit." My religious friends can't stand him. I have always wondered if I believed in something that was clearly not true and someone pointed out why it's obviously not true, would I accept it or would I hate the messenger?
paul1967 replies on Jan 29, 2018:
@SACatWalker I have concluded that I accept the new more accurate information. I'm wrong all the time, and I admit being wrong and I am usually pretty thankful to the person correcting me. But then again I'm not losing a promised eternity in heaven when I'm wrong. I usually just feel embarrassed.
Incest: Immoral or Moral?
Waco2017 comments on Jan 29, 2018:
More men will vote for moral than women. This question was probably brought to you by a male, which is why people are on here trying to hook up.
paul1967 replies on Jan 29, 2018:
It is true that I am a male, but I have no desire to sleep with my sister. Never have, never would, and she's adopted, so there isn't even the biological incompatibility problem. I'm like most people here; I was raised thinking it was icky at the very least. My question and that is all that it is, was to examine why the act itself of (non-procreating) sex between two related people is considered so abhorrent in so many cultures. Unfortunately, I must have done a lousy job of communicating that, because I received an uncomfortable amount of shaming from the community. I'll try harder in the future to post my question more clearly.
Tattoos
AMGT comments on Jan 29, 2018:
Ah man.. there’s an artist here who would do that serious justice. His name is Woo, and he does perfect single needle work. Look up tattoo artists in your area and see if they have an Instagram so you can check their work.
paul1967 replies on Jan 29, 2018:
Thank you so much. Woo is amazing.
Tattoos
twshield comments on Jan 29, 2018:
i want one https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZCYhgcM87x4
paul1967 replies on Jan 29, 2018:
Very funny
Tattoos
IAMGROOT comments on Jan 29, 2018:
I got my first tat a few years ago. Now have two. One is a custom piece and the other is Groot. (Surprise!). I found my artist by Googling and viewing samples of their work. Found stuff I liked and met with the guy. He did an awesome job of collaborating with me and helping to evolve my idea into ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 29, 2018:
Those are both very cool.My type of art too
Tattoos
evergreen comments on Jan 29, 2018:
Ask around locally. And I've suggested this to a few. Get some temporary tattoos that you like, and try out different locations for a few weeks. Examine how you feel seeing it there every day. How it blends with the kinds of clothes you wear. If you're in the work world - think about ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 29, 2018:
That does sound like a great idea thank you
Tattoos
Freedompath comments on Jan 29, 2018:
Do you mind my asking why? Your first, is this a joke? What happened to the rose?
paul1967 replies on Jan 29, 2018:
The rose is tiny. This is going to be my first major tattoo that encompasses about half of my back. or possibly my shoulder and upper arm.
Incest: Immoral or Moral?
walklightly comments on Jan 28, 2018:
If consenting adult siblings decide to have sex, it is only their business - as long as they don't procreate. it supports the freedom of choice, not harming a third party.
paul1967 replies on Jan 29, 2018:
@walklightly You are my type of people. You understand the simple and the complex and you have my respect and friendship.
Broken?
birdingnut comments on Jan 29, 2018:
I qualify for the demisexual label, so feel no sexual attraction for either gender, or even individuals, unless there's been a prolonged courtship of over a year. But I do enjoy friendship with people of like interests, and, even though I see men as pals, from having a lot of male traits myself,...
paul1967 replies on Jan 29, 2018:
Sexuality is a confusing topic. You have a sexual identity (what gender you feel you are or if you even have a gender) and sexual orientation (how you feel sexually toward others) This field of study is mind bendingly complicated and it's easy for me to confuse orientation and identity, but I'm trying.
Epistemolgy is the study of what we can know to be factual.
AxeElf comments on Jan 27, 2018:
All facts are based in faith.
paul1967 replies on Jan 29, 2018:
@AxeElf No, I understand what you're trying to say. You've made yourself clear, but saying something doesn't make it valid. You apparently believe in faith, and you support the idea of faith, so I suspect that you're attempting to twist a philosophical position in a way that promotes an unsupportable position. Faith is the belief in anything without evidence, up to and including believing something regardless of evidence that suggests it's not true. You have faith in Jesus being the son of God. You are shown by nonbelievers just how useless faith is, and that leaves you with no reason to believe so you want to show that all facts are based on faith. By doing that you can regain a reason to have faith. You're using a philosophical position of fallibilism to make the assertion that all facts are based on faith which is a position designed by apologists to muddy the water so that people of faith like yourself feel justified accepting faith as a reasoned means of knowledge. Faith fails the test. A Muslim has 100% faith that Allah is God and that Jesus was just a profit. A Christian has %100 faith that Yahweh is God, and the Jesus was his son, and at the same time was God himself along with the holy ghost. (That's mental gymnastics at it's finest.) Which religion is correct? How do you know? They could both be wrong, but they can't both be correct. What would help to determine which faith if either is worth following? The answer isn't faith because both religious followers hold the opposing faith. So faith cant get us to the truth of any claim. The best solution is to withhold your belief. Don't accept either proposition is true until a time comes when there is a valid reason to believe. Now doesn't that just make more sense to you? Don't you see how not having faith is a better way of knowing if you're justified in your belief?
Epistemolgy is the study of what we can know to be factual.
AxeElf comments on Jan 27, 2018:
All facts are based in faith.
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
@AxeElf So you're a supporter of fallibilism, that makes sense. Could it all be, that nothing can really be known? Sure it could be, but you would need to demonstrate that to me, can you do that? Faries and unicorns could be real too, but I don't claim they are until we find one. I can't test the existence of a unicorn, but I can test to see the volume of water with great accuracy. It seems like your argument is designed to make people feel secure in accepting faith as a reliable source of knowledge. By saying all facts are based on faith what you are saying is faith must be used for us to feel secure in what we know.
Epistemolgy is the study of what we can know to be factual.
AxeElf comments on Jan 27, 2018:
All facts are based in faith.
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
@AxeElf I'm an Atheist because I lack a belief in God and that's not the same as saying I do believe there is no God. I am also agnostic I have no knowledge of a God, but again that's not the same as saying I know no God exists. Atheism is a belief statement. Agnosticism is a knowledge statement. As to your other statement about all facts are based on faith, that is a bold statement. Let's test that. Water expands when it freezes. What part of that is based on faith? We know it does because we can test it, There is no faith in that scientific statement. So I still profoundly disagree with you, and moreover, I think you disagree with it too. The way I see it, your use of the word faith is, in my opinion, a sloppy and provocative way to make yourself look superior. People who lack a strong understanding of science might be convinced, but I'm not. If you said sometimes science needs to be based on, currently, untestable assumption to advance, I wouldn't disagree with you. I still wouldn't use a loaded word like faith unless my goal was to antagonize the reader which I believe is your motive. The goal here isn't to antagonize it's to advance an understanding of reality.
Incest: Immoral or Moral?
walklightly comments on Jan 28, 2018:
If consenting adult siblings decide to have sex, it is only their business - as long as they don't procreate. it supports the freedom of choice, not harming a third party.
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
@walklightly I love you lol. I honestly appreciate your recognition of my question. I was shocked and a little disappointed at some of the responses. The response that got the most likes accused me of supporting child rape, and I found that to be incredibly insulting. Again I appreciate your comment and support.
Epistemolgy is the study of what we can know to be factual.
AxeElf comments on Jan 27, 2018:
All facts are based in faith.
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
@AxeElf I know this is a lot to read, but if you skip anything don't skip the last paragraph because it is the crux of why I think you are historically wrong. I say "historically wrong" because it is how faith is used and how science is different. Oh, but they do test, and I will tell you how we check them. First, I want to deal with your statement about God because it points at an assumption. I'm an Atheist, and as one I don't NOT believe in a God. To make that more clear and to avoid a double negative, I do not know either way as to whether a God exists. I live my life as if one doesn't exist because I see no evidence of a God. If I did assert that there is no God you would be correct to say I take that on faith because to my knowledge there is no way to test the supernatural. Before I go on, I will admit that I do sometimes say, "I don't believe a God exists" which is a lazy faith-based position. I do occasionally partake in faith statements, but the difference is I know that I'm lazy and unclear when I say that. It's my shortcut to saying I have no evidence that would convince me that one does exist. I allow myself that. Foundational assumptions and how we test them: I'm going to use what I know the best, Gravity. The foundational premise of Gravity was that it was a force. Almost all the evidence supported that assumption. We used it convincingly to find the planet Neptune, and we still incorporate it today into many things because it's still a reliable tool. However, that assumption that gravity is a force was proven wrong by Einstien. We noticed that Mercury's orbit didn't fit into Newtonian calculations and for many years we thought it was an explainable anomaly that was yet unknown. Einstein's gift was his ability to imagine in the abstract. Many people falsely assume Einstein was a great mathematician, but in reality, he wasn't, he got a lot of help from his peers, but that's beside the point. The general theory of relativity explains gravity as a distortion of space (or more precisely, spacetime) caused by the presence of matter or energy. A massive object generates a gravitational field by warping the geometry of the surrounding spacetime, hence not a force. Are we taking this on faith? Could Einstein be wrong? No, we're not assigning an absolute to Einstines theory, as some future method could potentially provide an even better explanation, but for now, we use what works best. So how is my last statement not a statement of faith? It's not faith because with faith you stick to the foundational whether or not there is any reason to support it. Science will adapt by tossing out things that are shown to be inaccurate. Faith adapts by explaining away any evidence that contradicts its foundation. This is the core problem with faith; it ...
Broken?
taemaria27 comments on Jan 27, 2018:
you first.
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
@ChrisCamper I appreciate that very much. I'm not worried about her being unfaithful, well I guess it's possible, but it's the least of my concerns. I'm worried more about what the day in day out dynamic is going to be. A weekend here and there is very different than day after day month after month. I'm giving up a lot to make this move, and I'm trying to be cautious without letting my caution be the thing that destroys the relationship.
Broken?
JoelLefkowitz comments on Jan 27, 2018:
I had just turned 17. I came home from school and walked in our home. I started to walk to my bedroom and standing in my sisters room talking to my sister was a magnificent young lady. I was thunderstruck, smitten. What ever you want to call it, I was in love. My sister said, Joel this is my ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
That's a life story worth telling. Thanks for sharing it.
Broken?
hankster comments on Jan 27, 2018:
when i was in second grade i contracted cooties from this redheaded darling. i was hers in my eyes. just for a moment, i stepped off base. then, i was given cooties by another....cooties ain't that bad really.
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
Not bad? Cooties are what love is all about lol.
Broken?
Rugglesby comments on Jan 27, 2018:
I have an ex from 1999 that I still chat to online a few times a week, I don't doubt that she did love me once, and maybe still does in some way, she cheated on me almost 18 years ago, and still with him,but it took me a long time to get over her.
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
@Rugglesby You're a truly good man, and I give you all the respect I can offer.
Broken?
hlfsousa comments on Jan 27, 2018:
I wish I could thank a former classmate, Cintia (spelled like that in BR). I was just 14 at the time and we never really dated, but what she did saved me more than a decade after we parted ways. Sadly, I never found a way to locate her.
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
Life's not over yet, so you might years down the road, or she might find you.
Broken?
Labratthecattron comments on Jan 27, 2018:
I was hung up on one girl for years. We dated off and on, because I'm an idiot. She went on letting me believe that she cared about me in the same way I did for her. One day a couple months ago, she told me point blank that she has no romantic feelings towards me. Turns out, I was a toy. A bandaid ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
That's been me more than once. It never gets easier.
Broken?
Jnei comments on Jan 27, 2018:
Her name was Anja, and I won't get over losing her for as long as I live.
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
As long as life isn't over you never know what will come of it.
Broken?
Donotbelieve comments on Jan 27, 2018:
Nope
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
Fair enough.
Broken?
Freedompath comments on Jan 27, 2018:
Well, I want to share my story about several that I loved and lost...but, I got over all of them in time! There were times that I wanted to die over them, but I got over that too! Funny, thing, I feel an abundance of love now, from many sources! And, if one of those other situation presents ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
That's a great attitude, and the willingness to keep yourself open to the possibility of love is also essential.
Broken?
BucketlistBob comments on Jan 27, 2018:
Paul... for some reason with all the luck in the world, I got the one that really compliments me. All those unanswers prayers was dumb luck that got me here. It all turned out the way it was suppose to be.
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
That's awesome! I am inspired to know that sometimes it does happen.
Broken?
MrLizard comments on Jan 27, 2018:
This story happened this past October. I met a woman i'd chatted with on J-Date. I figured if the woman was Jewish, at least we'd have some culture in common. We hit it off immediately and she and I went on dates every other night. We both seemed to feel that difficult to explain connection and...
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
My imagination is running wild about what that thing is. I'm not asking you to reveal it, but I can't help but wonder what would scare her off like that. I will say this; it was the right thing to do whatever it was.
Broken?
KKGator comments on Jan 27, 2018:
Sometimes, you just don't get "closure". That's a hard lesson to learn. It is, however, possible to learn it. We don't always get to understand the 'why' of things.
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
I might sound cold, but I've been in those relationships where I don't care about closure I just want out. I guess it's selfish not to concern myself with the other person needs or wants.
Broken?
HippieChick58 comments on Jan 27, 2018:
I thought I had one once, but looking back on it there were lots of lies., and some of them were really huge lies. He wanted to change me in many ways. He was supposed to move from California to Nebraska, but he couldn't get rid of his baggage to do that. In the end he loved his stuff more than me, ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 28, 2018:
I agree, and that is something I'm doing myself right now. I'm leaving a job I love and friends and family I care for to be with the person I love. She has kids and can't move to me, so I'm moving to be with her. So it can be done if you care enough.
Broken?
jayneonacobb comments on Jan 27, 2018:
I bought a house, car and ring for a woman. She had been cheating on me for the previous six months ( I had no idea). When she left the only thing she didn't take was a positive pregnancy test and a receipt for the abortion. She left them on the floor in the middle of my empty living room. She spent...
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
Dear lord man! That's a terrifyingly messed up human. That's got to be one of the worst experiences with a woman I've ever heard. I'm so sorry you had to endure that.
Broken?
Funandfondles comments on Jan 27, 2018:
My ex girlfriend and I have been together for the last 3 years and had a child together. Much of the situation I’m in is no where next to ideal, we broke up months ago and she still lives with me, the date she leaves keeps getting pushed back, and is now set for February 5th (don’t judge, you ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
I never had children, so I can only imagine the additional pain of a family breakup would be. You lose the dynamic of a family environment along with someone you have feelings for and on top of all that she's in your life forever.
Broken?
Jack-of-scythes comments on Jan 27, 2018:
What good will it do to lament about it? My tale is my own masochism. I chose the illusion of wealth and power over the smile, laughter, and warmth of a wonderful woman. I dove into the bottle for a year. I raged. I adapted.
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
This might be a selfish reason on my part, but I'm getting myself into something that scares the crap out of me, and it helps me hear these stories.
Broken?
Rugglesby comments on Jan 27, 2018:
I have an ex from 1999 that I still chat to online a few times a week, I don't doubt that she did love me once, and maybe still does in some way, she cheated on me almost 18 years ago, and still with him,but it took me a long time to get over her.
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
I hope I'm open to ask you this and you can ignore it if it's asking too much but what does she offer you? This isn't just a matter of unfair circumstance, she cheated on you.
Broken?
buck1977 comments on Jan 27, 2018:
There's one girlfriend from my past that I would drop everything to be with, if she ever said yes. I hadn't spoken to her in 8 years and I found her on FB and said hello a couple weeks ago on her birthday. We've been casually texting since. I've tried to repeat the process it took to fall in love ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
You didn't ask for advice, but I'm offering it anyway. Keep trying, even if it fails it's worth the effort. Anyone who has that kind of impact on you is worth the effort.
Broken?
ChrisCamper comments on Jan 27, 2018:
I don't know if it's been long enough to qualify as a "never got over" but I had a break up about 6 months ago that I'm not over. Great relationship, 4 years, thought about marriage, but she mentioned she didn't know if she'd be as happy with someone who she wouldn't get to go to heaven with. I ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
I got married to someone who said those exact words to me. I could be wrong to say this, but I'll say it anyway, you may have dodged a bullet on that one. There's such a crazy dynamic that manifests later in a married relationship when one believes you are deserving of that sort of punishment. The resentment builds over the years knowing that this person feels justified in worshiping a God that put's a gun in your mouth and says love me, or I'll blow your brains out for an eternity.
Broken?
Sarahroo29 comments on Jan 27, 2018:
I cared too much for my exes that didn't care for me.
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
It sounds like your former boyfriends used you, and that can be very hard to get over. I'm embarrassed to say that I've been on both sides of that. I strive not to be that to anyone ever again.
Epistemolgy is the study of what we can know to be factual.
AxeElf comments on Jan 27, 2018:
All facts are based in faith.
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
@AxeElf Honestly, I don't mean to be rude or come across as a jerk. It's just that you are entirely wrong about this and it may be that our definition of faith is vastly different. Faith tells you nothing about what is true or not true. It sounds to me like what you're saying is that at the core of all things we need to make basic assumptions. I don't disagree with that. Most fact stand on the foundation of assumptions, however, those assumptions are put to the test which is the primary difference between faith and evidence. With faith, you either can't or don't test to see if that belief is true. Or if you can and do a test, and it turns out not to be true you disregard that data and trust your "knowledge" despite the data that contradicts those beliefs.
Broken?
taemaria27 comments on Jan 27, 2018:
you first.
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
My story is different than most, very different. My story isn't about a sudden end to a great relationship; it was a gradual fade. I met the love of my life when I was 15 years old. Christine and I had that extraordinary summer of love, the type you typically see in a Hollywood story of two kids in love. She was my first lover, she listened to me, and she never judged me. I wasn't a particularly bright student, my reading and writing skills were far below my grade level, but instead of demeaning me she encouraged me. I was shown a level of care and support that I had never before received. I found out that at the end of that summer Christine's Mom was moving out of state taking her away from me which was incredibly painful. We did the long-distance relationship for two years and during that time Christine got pregnant. I wasn't angry I was very supportive, I even saved up my money to fly out and spend time and meet her daughter. As more time went by we gradually started writing to one another less and less and then eventually nothing, and the relationship just vanished. I thought about Christine thousands of times over the course of 34 years. I tried finding her on facebook, never having any success. Christine has always been that love that I compared all my other lovers to and nobody ever measured up. Recently she found me, and as fate would have it, we were both going through divorces. We talked to each other every day several times a day, and it's like those 34 years never happened, it feels like absolutely no time has passed and we are kids again. I've gone to visit her a few times, and our chemistry is as strong as the day we first fell in love. I just quit my job I sold most of my stuff, and I found an apartment near to her. Most of my friends and family are saying I'm nuts, and all I can say is if I am, and everything fails then I'll pick myself up and move forward but if I don't try I will always regret it. I have fears, of course, I'm giving up a lucrative job, walking away from friends and family, but it keeps coming down to if I don't try....?
Broken?
Condor5 comments on Jan 27, 2018:
My first real love, in high school, Paula. Stole my heart, then one day I went over to her house and she said she couldn't see me anymore. No reason given. I was devastated; didn't get over her for years. I never actually found out why she ended it, but I'm pretty sure it was because she was a "good...
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
I'm sure you were kidding, but I'm sure you were no worse than any other high school boy.
Broken?
Akfishlady comments on Jan 27, 2018:
I think the most recent 'love' was the hardest for me. I thought we had something amazing. I was finally in with someone who had similar interests, values, and just felt good to be with. I think for the first time in my life I was loving unconditionally and that is saying something. There must have...
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
I understand the pain you experienced I've been there a time or two myself. I even paid a girlfriend to go to Paris to supposedly see her family, but it was really a trip to be with her former boyfriend. I only found out because I showed up to surprise her. I'm sure every time we lose someone the pain is different the amount of time it takes to heal is different. I'm sorry you had to go through that, but I am glad to hear you're willing to try again.
Broken?
AMGT comments on Jan 27, 2018:
Only my son. When you lose a child, no lost romantic loves matter anymore. Nothing really matters anymore. It puts all things into a perspective that cannot happen any other way. Even the trauma I endured growing up doesn’t matter anymore.
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
I can't begin to imagine.
Broken?
JustLuAnn comments on Jan 27, 2018:
I am but a jagged piece of stained glass, put together by my own determination, and free will. I shared one story of My Tim. The other one that left me broken was not my husband but a man I loved and still will love for the rest of my days. His name is Michael. That story is for another day. As ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
Sounds like a story other people could identify with and possibly help mend old painful wounds.
If you could go back in time and undo something in your past, would you?
NooYawkGurrl comments on Jan 27, 2018:
Definitely. I would go back to the night in 1995 when my brother was murdered and chain him to something so he couldn't leave the house.
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
Wow, that hit me. I would give my one trip to you so you could do that.
Epistemolgy is the study of what we can know to be factual.
AxeElf comments on Jan 27, 2018:
All facts are based in faith.
paul1967 replies on Jan 27, 2018:
No no no. No. All "facts" are evidence-based. Faith is trusting in something that has no evidence or has evidence that contradicts that belief.
Best fictional TV show that features Atheism?
paul1967 comments on Jan 26, 2018:
My first exposed to atheism on TV was Star Trek S2 E2 "Who Mourns For Adonais?" In this episode, it is made clear Scotty doesn't believe in God(s) I was shocked that a TV network would allow a protagonist character to be an atheist in the late 60s. Since then I have seen more exposure on the subject...
paul1967 replies on Jan 26, 2018:
@David1955 "Balance of Terror" S1 E15 is my all time favorite TOS. Mark Lenard (who also played Spock's father) was a great actor, and he set the bar far too high for any other actor playing a Romulan in TOS. John Colicos as Commander Kor did the best Klingon in TOS. Most of the others "villains" were too generic lacking substance and cunning.
I turned a guy down for a date - busy at work and decided not to date.
Qualia comments on Jan 26, 2018:
Coffee.....riiiiight ..... just coffee....and chatting.... uh huh. LOL Going out for just coffee hasn't meant just that in 20+ years, if ever.
paul1967 replies on Jan 26, 2018:
@Qualia I get what you're saying, and I think your comment is more accurate on the whole than I gave it credit. I just know that it isn't always accurate, at least not for me. I just started drinking coffee myself, and I've only gone to a coffee house a handful of times, but the few times I've gone, I've never had anyone romantically approach me. However, that may have more to do with my gender than anything else. I'm too oblivious to people around me to even think about approaching a woman I've never met and firing up a conversation with her with the motivation of romantic intentions. It would feel weird, but I'm not a numbers guy who thinks the more I approach, the better my odds.
Work work work. I am on a 12 year plan to live the life I dream. What do you dream?
Rugglesby comments on Jan 26, 2018:
Hey man, I hope it works out for you. I think I am too old to have dreams now, life is pretty much under control.
paul1967 replies on Jan 26, 2018:
I get what you're saying and when you get a bit older dreams lose their magic. I've dreamed enough, and it's time to stop and if there is something worth dreaming about it's also worth doing something about it. I look at dream like I look at prayer. It's a beautiful thought, but thoughts are just thoughts. If I want anything, I'll do something to make it happen.
Best fictional TV show that features Atheism?
paul1967 comments on Jan 26, 2018:
My first exposed to atheism on TV was Star Trek S2 E2 "Who Mourns For Adonais?" In this episode, it is made clear Scotty doesn't believe in God(s) I was shocked that a TV network would allow a protagonist character to be an atheist in the late 60s. Since then I have seen more exposure on the subject...
paul1967 replies on Jan 26, 2018:
@David1955 I entirely do agree and I didn't know about the line substitution from "Mankind has no need of Gods" to "We find one God sufficient." It would have been such a powerful statement had CBS allowed that line to stay as it was written, but I have no doubt they would have lost sponsors had they done that. @birdingnut Believe it or not I don't own a TV anymore. I got tired of TV and it feels great. I still watch shows but way fewer and they're only the shows I can find on the CBS website or Hulu.
I turned a guy down for a date - busy at work and decided not to date.
Qualia comments on Jan 26, 2018:
Coffee.....riiiiight ..... just coffee....and chatting.... uh huh. LOL Going out for just coffee hasn't meant just that in 20+ years, if ever.
paul1967 replies on Jan 26, 2018:
I disagree, I enjoy talking to women, and I've taken plenty out for a cup of coffee without any desire or intention of romance. I bring one of my female coworkers a cookie from a coffee shop every morning, and we've never had any desire to be romantic with one another. I can't speak for this guy's intentions because the circumstances seem a bit weird but to say that a guy asking out a woman for coffee or lunch means they want in your pants is just not valid. At least not for me, I hope it's not true of all other men.
Would you want a Christian God to be real?
france18 comments on Jan 23, 2018:
Yes, a Christian believes that God as you say is real. I am glad that he is, he is someone who is powerful ie created the heavens and the earth. I am also glad that he does not use his power to be at the use of us pressing a button and hey presto he has compiled with our wishes, painful that may ...
paul1967 replies on Jan 23, 2018:
That's super interesting, so if I understand you correctly you believe in a God, and you reject the scientific data that shows that we did, in fact, evolve from one species into another, species repeatably over 100s of millions of years. I respect your beliefs, and I definitely disagree, but I don't think you're wrong for believing what you believe. I do have a question for you if you don't mind? Is your belief in a God based on the fact that you don't want to accept the data that shows evolution to be true or is your belief in a God just a personal conclusion that it must be true? If it's a little of both or something entirely different would you please explain. I would be super interested in hearing your response. I want to assure you that I'm not judgmental and I have no feelings of being intellectually superior, or otherwise. I just find this subject to be fascinating.
Do you trust that what you believe to be true, is true?
MsOliver comments on Jan 2, 2018:
Most of us are freethinkers, not brainless drones. We research, question each other, and back up our claims with science and research. If you want to hang with the folks that just believe what sounds correct, you should check out the ones relying on a book of questionable history to tell them what...
paul1967 replies on Jan 3, 2018:
It's not that I want to believe what sounds good, in fact, I fight that urge all the time. Things pop up all the time that I just accept because I read it or heard it in the news. Just tonight I was reading that parts of the US are going to be colder than Mars. Well, that statement may be correct or it might not be? Do I believe it just because CNN is reporting it? Do I feel like researching that fact? Not really, but most of the time I'll accept what I read as valid without verifying it. I think we all do that. I think most people here are guilty of doing that. I image I believe all sorts of things that aren't true and I imagine you do too.

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Agnostic, Atheist, Humanist, Secularist, Skeptic, Freethinker
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