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QUITTING...smoking (1 MONTH!!!) and my job (tomorrow).

So after some careful consideration I'm taking another "leap of faith"...mostly in myself and my instincts...and not returning to work tomorrow.

Why? Because the job is a toxic environment in too many ways. Since November, I've been in a vicious cycle of getting deathly ill, taking several days off, then returning to work just to get sick again.

Since November I've quit smoking twice, both times because I was just too ill to smoke. Bronchitis, the flu and the worst lupus outbreak I've ever experienced have taken me to the nearest to death I want to be two more times in less than four months.

The physical toxicity is due to a lot of factors: high turn over, people demanding to work sick, poor HVAC maintenance...most recently food rotting in both refrigerators.

I won't even go into some other serious bad management decisions, or lack thereof, (here, anyway) but, since I'm somewhat recovered and able to effectively look for something else it's time to break the cycle. It's better to be destitute than dead.

This is the beginning of my letter of immediate resignation...from the job but, as depressing as things may be, not from life. This is the best forum I have for sharing this...I may even make a long overdue AA visit...but if you have any "strength, experience and hope" tales or advice, now's the time.

Not to worry about me though...I've been in far worse situations...such as the job I'm now leaving!

DangerDave 8 Feb 18

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11 comments

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1

Rehab is for quitters

1

before quitting smoking for good 6 years ago i'd had 4 or 5 attempts over more than 3 decades, every time yielding to the cerebral call of habit after 2 months or so. in 2012 i went to a hypnotherapist, paid an exorbitant price (which included a kind of guarantee: should i ever relapse, i could always come back for another, free, session) for a one-hour session & haven't looked back since. no cravings ever! cigarette smoke actively disgusts me. the $480 i spent then i did save fifteenfold since. why anyone would want to suffer & keep suffering the urge if this option is available, with the sincere intention & a good hypnotherapist, is beyond me.

I'd considered but my first five year quit was the patch. Then I "romanced" tobacco as I did the act lead I had at the time who smoked.

I'm vaping now but it's more to satiate the oral fixation. Juice is cheap and I'm good with that...if the oral cravings continue then I might ween to sugar free hard candy awhile.

good luck, @DangerDave.

1

Sounds like you're not panicking so you are on the right road. Looks like you already have received some excellent advice and support here. To paraphrase an Irish saying "may the breeze stir up the hairs on your chest to beat you a tattoo to Fulfilment, Peace and health!"

3

I have walked from a number of jobs, most of them quite good, but my time was up and felt flat in the job. I understand the leap of faith, but the thing about humans is, we survive, we adapt, we thrive. We make a doubtful situation work.

1

I quit smoking again myself on Friday. I made it 3 and a half weeks last time when I hit an emotional withdrawal effect that no one warned me about, that happens at about 1 month. I kept being told the first week was the hardest, the second week wasn't as hard, and it would be easy enough after that. In reality, the first 10 days were hard for me to refrain from smoking, but got easier and not a real problem after that. Unfortunately there was an emotional trainwreck in slow-motion progress that ended up crossing a line. I'm better prepared this time though.

Best wishes!

Congratulations! We can do this!

Sadly, I had to test the waters after my 10 days of antibiotics for bronchitis. I felt 10 feet tall and bulletproof, the bane of addicts anywhere, so surely I could bum just one. 10 minutes later I was running to the corner store.

Then the flu, followed by the most severe lupus outbreak I feel may have gone from just epidermal to my digestive system. There is no way I could pay for the specialist but there is no need. If they confirmed it there is no cure anyway...anyway...

I live day to day and minute by minute as needed...its worked for drugs and alcohol...now for tobacco as well as the day to day dilemmas.

@DangerDave I can relate to the "just one" fail. Done that a few times. Thanks for the reminder that it is never okay.

Just realized today was day 4. It's going easier this time, but I'd better knock wood real fast.

Best wishes to you.

Get a give up smoking buddy who will talk you out of 3am cravings on day 2!

1

Congrats on quitting smoking and on your decision to leave a toxic job. With having quit smoking and the job, you will hopefully feel immediate positive results!

I already have,,,though I'm kicking myself for not having quit the job a month ago...though I might have not stayed on the cig wagon...I left last Tuesday after two hours after just a week back and I'm finally lucid enough to break the cycle instead of just going in to be to sick to work again in just another week or so! Thanks!

4

You only have one life

that is so true! i use it as a regular mantra, whenever something unpleasant needs to be averted. then people say: oh, i so admire that you are honest about not doing or wanting this or that! all i can answer is: this is my only life - it's all i have. why waste it?

fuck yes and at the very worst waist it as you want to if you want to. its all you really have.

4

Often the hardest thing is to quit something stressful (e.g. a job or relationship) and take a leap of faith. But in my experience removing that stress has immense benefits and you never regret it. Good luck with your new life 🙂

3

Good for you, and good luck to you!

Thanks! I'm working on my professional resume and portfolio today...I have a week before I'll just have to find another dead end job.

I'm going to use that week to recover a bit more...the residual lupus outbreak should be cleared much better by then.

@DangerDave I am 100% serious about this. Before you go any further on your resume go to Askamanager.org and read the advice on resumes, cover letters, job searching, etc. Wonderful site, excellent information.The site owner.blogger is an HR person with loads of experience. Fascinating read. Everything about office culture, management, HR, legal issues. I read it every day and go into withdrawals on the weekends.

I'll check it out...definitely for my occupational resume. Do they have advice for artistic portfolios? Anyway, I'll give it a look over tomorrow but I've got a very different professional artistic portfolio in that I have so many artistic skills.

3

Poor HVAC maintenance could possibly be a OSHA issue. I would contact them. I once filed an OSHA complaint on a business because of noxious fumes coming from them. You may also be able to file workman's comp and cite a hostile work environment.

Thanks for mentioning OSHA. I will be sending my finished "letter of immediate resignation" tomorrow (started above) to several agencies but I hadn't thought of OSHA. That place is a cesspool and its not only the fault of the property managers.

4

If you really think the work environment was worsening your health, sue them for you having to quit. and for your treatment and comp.

I don't have any hope of putting together a lawsuit now but it could happen. I will be sending a much more detailed letter of resignation to several appropriate agencies, however.

I've missed so much work in sick days I have to consider survival first and foremost.

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