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Does anyone else feel a disconnect in culture in which it feels difficult to meet others?

TjallTjall 7 Feb 22
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Yes, my wife and I feel that, and find it difficult to meet others and develop a social life. We are both introverts and rather withheld and have modest social needs to begin with, which doesn't help.

Neither of us had significant difficulty dating people when we were single, but that's in my view actually an easier scenario for someone who is not socially anxious or unconfident. The bigger problem is in developing "meaningful" / "committed" friendships. People have arbitrary notions who to include / exclude from such considerations. For example there's a nice couple next door to us but he's fixated on people within a few years of his age; he's 71 and I'm 61 so I'm just not "his age". In addition, I don't play his favored sports. I think those are dumb considerations at our age. On the other side of us is a couple who are somewhat the social climber types and they gauge us as Not That Useful to improving their social status because we don't play those kinds of games. And so forth.

mordant Level 8 Feb 22, 2018

Definitely. I don't know what people are talking about when they discuss TV, pop/country music, or the movies at the theater. They don't know what I'm talking about in books or obscure music.

It's lonely. I find I have a lot more in common with people I meet online.

Lysistrata Level 7 Feb 22, 2018

Facebook is my land of misfit toys.

@TjallTjallOUTLK I'd join your FB group, but I don't want to blow anyone's anonymity. I get little pieces of pop culture that I love like "Westworld" and a few Netflix series, but people start talking about "This Is Us" and I'm lost.

But I'm here and I'm an interested audience. What are your hobbies and what do you like to learn about?

I've not seen the original, so I was surprised and delighted by the new version. It's so thought-provoking and so satisfying to imagine the implications of that reality, the distance between now and that future, and the role you'd play. Plus, Ed Harris is fantastic and seedy. I could watch him read jello recipes.

I haven't done much in genealogy and I don't have blue eyes, but I do occasionally beta-read anime for independent authors. Psychology has always been an interest of mine; my 16th birthday gift from my parents was the DSM-3R. lol. They were psych professionals so I heard a lot of shop talk growing up.

I'm currently listening to "Clap Hands" by Tom Waits. I'm not all that into jazz, but I've got my own eclectic tastes. Radiohead, Bjork, Fiona Apple, Okkervil River, 60s, 70s. Not really into anything 50s.

I research a lot for my writing and I learn from editing other authors. Creativity really turns me on. I love reading new stuff that no one's seen before, helping people shape their ideas into books. Actually, my huge thrill for the day is that my favorite Indie author approved my 3-month-old friend request. I'm all fangirl about it. lol

I love old films with great dialog. "Hud" "Who's Afraid of Virginia Wolf" "The Lion in Winter." The language in those scripts was pure poetry. I love to watch the greats like Liz Taylor, Peter O'Toole, or Paul Newman throw themselves so deep into a role you don't even remember you're watching an icon.

I misspelled Woolf. Moving too fast.

Grant is brown-eyed... or at least hazel.

Congratulations on your kinship to Harris. 🙂

@TjallTjallOUTLK "The Idler Wheel..." is one of the best albums ever made, I think. Pure madness. I'm bad with pronunciation. There are so many words I've only ever read and never heard. I guess that speaks to the solitude again.

@TjallTjallOUTLK Oh, what a low and horny race are we. 🙂

I'm not complaining.