Grew up Catholic. During a health crisis in 97 I joined Knights of Columbus and attended church 5-6x/week. In Feb 2000 my died and I was told by KofC that my family couldn’t use council hall (we have priority for family death) because my had addiction issues. During another meeting we were told we HAD to actively promote anti-gay, anti-porn and anti-abortion messaging. I’m gay and was targeting, but sitting next to me at the meeting was a member who was convicted of molestation of his granddaughters and their little friends. Hypocrisy made me quit, and when priest was forcing parishioners to sign petition against gay marriage was last draw (priest was dating my male roommate at the time).
Was more angry at god. I have been watching Christopher Hitchens, Richard Dawkins, ... on YouTube in last 2 months and they convinced me 0% against all religions.
The irony is I have recently identified as atheist and I’m terminal. I was given a year to live Feb.20 and know that it’s now a question of weeks (hope to see Trump lose election) and I’ve made peace with idea of being extinguished at death. I keep fighting to stay at home to the end instead of a nursing home. I’m only 52 - can’t see myself in a nursing home. My pain is mostly controlled so I really want to die at home. I spend my time chatting online to pass the time.