Today I had someone tell me, " if you don't spank your kids they'll grow up to be brats". I tried to explain to him that statistically speaking, spanking makes them more likely to grow up with problems. He seemed unwilling or unable to understand. Has anyone else experienced this sort of thing?
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7 comments
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.I was spanked as a child, and I’ve never understood the the view of “hit the child to teach them hitting is wrong.” To me it’s lazy and reactive parenting. I’ve had several conversations with my father-in-law about our not choosing to spank our kids, and he’ll never get it.
JojoHuckleberry
Level 3
Mar 21, 2019
0
I was spanked as a child, and I’ve never understood the the view of “hit the child to teach them hitting is wrong.” To me it’s lazy and reactive parenting. I’ve had several conversations with my father-in-law about his son and I choosing to not spank our kids, and he’ll never get it.
JojoHuckleberry
Level 3
Mar 21, 2019
0
MANY of my relatives and people in my geographic area hounded me endlessly about how spoiled rotten my kids would turn out because I did not spank. Mine are now in college and tremendously successful there. Many of theirs have had some pretty huge problems. (not saying there's cause-effect there).
Interestingly, my mother voices no small amount of guilt over having spanked my brother and I so much, only to see my kids turn out so well without it.
Zster
Level 8
Sep 30, 2018
1
Honestly I don’t even bother trying to converse with people about stuff like this.
What gets me though is that people always compliment me on how well my toddler acts and I don’t pop or spank them.
People like that expect kids to be well behaved 100% of the time.
MoonlitLife
Level 5
June 1, 2018
0
Yes. It's so,so difficult to talk people out of this bias! My parents spanked me and that's why I'm not a jerk,is a really common argument I hear. It's always folks who stay with abusers,are abusers, are in and out of jail or have major drug problems too. I have given up trying to talk to them and just don't discuss my kids/have my kids around them. 
OpposingOpposum
Level 9
Apr 7, 2018
2
Pretty much, yeah. It's just so prevalent in the U.S., especially where I live, that it can be hard to even find a sitter.
@DonThiebaut oh yeah
This is a scientific fact and the APA strongly advises against all spanking. I've never found it necessary to hit things that don't do what I want. I'm not a caveman.
Lysistrata
Level 7
Mar 31, 2018
3
Depends on the spanking, how hard, how frequent, etc.
GlyndonD
Level 7
Mar 30, 2018
0
Well, of course there are less bad ways to spank. But this guy didn't even want to hear it. It was all 'beat your kids, it's good for them'.
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