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So I've been thinking about what term I would like to apply to myself as a non-binary transwoman. The term that I identify with the most is shemale, which is considered extremely offensive to the vast majority of binary transwomen. I get why it can be offensive to them but I embrace it. People have been telling me for some time that nobody can define me but me, so that's what I'm going.

Islandgurl 6 May 12
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Gay was once a slur. Homo was a slur. I think if It fits for you that's all you need. We've taken so many of these terms back that I think it's kind of how we evolve as queerfolk. Obviously don't over use it if someone is offended by it but don't worry too much.

Peeves Level 6 May 13, 2018
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Your identity. Run with it. Sometimes I'll refer to myself a tranny, call friends who I know use the term themselves trannies, and refer to a social night out in a dress as trannying. I'm finding myself doing it a lot less than I used to, because that isn't really how I identify these days. But the point is that while I did, it was valid. So is shemale for you.

The only term I take issue with is 'trap.' And I've encountered a few who do identify as traps, and who get a thrill from deceiving men into having sex with them. I believe a lot of transphobia revolves around the trap trope. (The classic couple in bed "I love holding your balls. It reminds me how much I miss mine" gag plays on the awkwardness of this situation.) It doesn't help that there are still people out there who make it a reality.

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That's the term one of my nonbinary transwoman friends wants to use for herself.
I told her that term is considered a slur, but maybe if enough people start using it, it will become acceptable.

birdingnut Level 8 May 12, 2018

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