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Has being introvert affected your social life style?

I mean I am an introvert so I do not feel comfortable when I am at a crowed place with too many people, like party, wedding party or birthday party, and I am less talkative individual who talks as less as possible, all these affected my social life style, for example I never had a girl friend and I am 27 years old, every time a girl approached me, found me being boring and finally gave up.

NR92 6 Nov 6
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1

It's okay to be introverted, unless you feel like it's getting in the way of your personal growth... Which I get the sense you feel it is.

First is all, as others here have noted, you are not alone. As an introvert, I can relate -- I've skipped countless events because the anxiety of having to deal with groups was simply overwhelming.

Have you considered talking with a professional? An experienced counselor or therapist can help with teaching you techniques on how to deal with social anxiety... my therapist has been a huge help, and has provided me with a set of tricks or tools to help dealing with people in settings like weddings and other group gatherings.

1

When I did have a partner I felt comfortable going out. Never stay anywhere vary long if on my own though.

Jeff26 Level 6 Nov 11, 2019
1

It has in the past and still does to a certain extent. At my 'stage of life' I have experienced a lot and that plus living in a very extroverted community helps a lot. When there is a gathering there is usually several people I know.

2

Yes, being an introvert affects my social life. I get very uncomfortable at large parties, festivals, or events where I'm expected to interact with tons of people for long stretches of time, particularly if I only know one or two other people there. And sometimes, things set in the future will sound fun but when the day arrives, the idea of being stuck in a crowd of strangers for hours is overwhelming, so I'll just cancel the plans.

At nearly twice your age, all I can offer is that you keep trying to put yourself out there, it does improve with practice. Try to schedule quality "recovery time" for yourself after any event you know will be stressful, to help find balance. And don't be afraid to discuss anxiety with a doctor or counselor. I've found helpful information and advice from both over the years.

2

As far as having a social life, sure, being introverted affects that. What I've learned is how to be sociable in a way that I find comfortable. I enjoy gaming, and not computer gaming on line (people can be such dicks when they have anonymity), I enjoy sitting down at a table with people. D&D/pathfinder, and other role playing games are always good. Board games and card games can be fun, but I avoid those that pit the players against each other (which really limits the options). The Arkham Horror board game is a good example of a board game that doesn't pit the players against each other, instead it has a mechanic that pits the players against the board itself. If the game is silly enough, player competition becomes secondary. Cards Against Humanity is fantastic, Uno (while also known as "screw your neighbor" ) doesn't make me feel as though I'm constantly at odds with the other players, and my Mom raised us kids playing solitare together. And yes, I know, a game intended to be played alone? How do you play that with others? Everyone has their own deck, you lay out your hands as usual, but any ace that goes up can be played on by everyone. The aim is to run out of your hand first. What's really fun about this is that while it is competitive, it's also cooperative. We can still get stuck, and that's when you start looking around and helping others out to open up some way you can move on yourself. It makes for a fantastic time, and the only limit to number of players is number of decks available.

I know how to function in these sorts of settings, because the game rules are laid out for me ahead of time. Without that structure, I clam up. But while the game is running, I can talk with the others and be open. I can joke, I can engage in light conversation, I can be sociable.

As far as having companionship... yea, being introverted affects that as well. I don't know how to meet people, and I've never been invited to a party, much less out to the bar or for drinks or anything. I had a hell of a time trying to get a gaming group together, took me 3 years to get it started, and we still struggled with only a few people for a long time. Recently we've managed to get some more players and things have kinda taken off. It's allowed me to meet people in a way that I couldn't before. And while I still haven't met anyone that wants to date me, I'm at least meeting people.

Look into Uwe Rosenberg games. His games are amazing and most aren't PvP at all. Caverna, A Feast for Odin, Le Havre all great and they're all also solo friendly, too.

@Orly Thank you for the recommendation, I'll have to look those up.

0

Don't get out much

bobwjr Level 10 Nov 6, 2019
4

I hate parties, weddings, any social events. Having to talk to people I don't know, don't care about, and will probably never see again is pretty stressful for me. I decline whenever possible. If I can't decline, I go for a brief time and leave early. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

4

Yep - introversion very much affects my social life. There’s lots of events I avoid because of it - social anxiety is also a factor.
From one flaming introvert to another, welcome!

Haemish1 Level 8 Nov 6, 2019
2

Welcome to the club . Before you worry about not having a girlfriend , you may want to ask yourself , do you want one ? Do you want a girlfriend , or are you just feeling you ought to have one because that's what other guys do ? If you do truly want to be with someone , then it's time you sat yourself down and reviewed how you're approaching the matter . What are your interests , that you can share with someone else ? What do you do that you enjoy ? OK , let's say , you enjoy reading and spend a lot of your time on the internet . Those are things introverts do . Perhaps you could join book clubs , join on line clubs related to your interests . Find events on line that interest you and go to those . Let's say you enjoy reading about Sci/fantasy/animae . Find Sci/Fantasy/animae conventions on line and go to those . That's where you'll meet woman who share your common interests .

Cast1es Level 9 Nov 6, 2019
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