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Seven lines over limit. Sorry.

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It's that time of the year again, folks. Time to support all those needy corporations and the poor cashiers and floor people who work for them by pushing through crowds with elbows held at solar plexus height to get to those precious sale items on Aisle 5, you know, the Blue Light Specials.

To that end, I give you a song I dashed off for the occasion:

JINGLE SALES

Shopping craze
Hectic days
Dashing through the maze
Told my shrink I need a drink
And a year with double pay

Running through the mall
Causing hearts to fibrilate
To the sales we go
Hoping we’re not late

Standing in the lines
Counting bills I have not paid
Taking out my card
Spending more than’s made

Shopping craze
Hectic days
Dashing through the maze
Told my shrink I need a drink
And a year with double pay

Wishing I were home
Lying in a quiet place
Chucking down cold beer
Punching Santa’s face

Headache’s growing strong
Humor fades and temper flares
Shucking all my grace
Running for the stairs

Shopping craze
Hectic days
Dashing through the maze
Told my shrink I need a drink
And a year with double pay

Exit from the mall
Cooling breezes on my face
Start the car and go
Throttle opened wide
Oh, what fun it is to go
And find a place to hide

Shopping craze
Hectic days
Dashing through the maze
Told my shrink I need a drink
And a year with double pay

evidentialist 8 Dec 11
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2 comments

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1

It's still hilarious and I'm glad you posted it here.

pixiedust Level 8 Dec 11, 2018
2

The chaos of the season. Good write

azzow2 Level 9 Dec 11, 2018

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