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Here's a poem I wrote at school, some sixty plus years ago, using different spellings for the same sound (rhyme)

I find it really quite absurd
That when an Englishman is heard
To say an ordinary word
Its spelling cannot be inferred.
For he follows not the common herd
With gutteral, brogue or vowel, well stirred
His speech, if sober, is not slurred
But rings out clearly, as a bird.

Oh! Pity the foreigner, gaping dumbly,
When he first encounters the name of Cholmondeley.
(For the benefit of foreigners, Cholmondeley is pronounced as "Chum lee".)

Petter 9 May 1
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tioteo Level 8 May 1, 2019

Thank you. I used to be when I was younger.


Very witty! That reminds of the official English accent as per BBC radio and TV. I read somewhere that the main objection to to the regional TV series Coronation Street back in the 60s was the 'objectionable' accent. As it turned out, people loved the series.

brentan Level 8 May 1, 2019

I don't think that it was a common name in the north of England.

With luck we sent them all out to Africa and India.


Dickens created a character called Mr Lorry
My accent and his name made me rue
The ignorance of Mr Prahearne, a worry
Of an English teacher having manners effete.
These days I suppose you'd sue.
The little puff did me loudly and publicly berate
As I read his name in Lancashire accent Mr "Lurry".
My classmates, brown noses one and all, did grin
As Prahearne in southern enunciation said Mr Lorry.
And I responded with "this here is in't north" to their chagrin.
And consenting adults hadn't been passed by then.
©Rjn 2019

@Petter. I've always wanted to rhyme chagrin with something.
A professional poetry writer and performer took up my challenge about 15 years ago and fell flat on his chin when he used chagrin. I don't know if he has now improved his execrable lines containing chagrin and a rhyme!

@FrayedBear Some words, like Worcestershire, correctly pronounced, have no rhyme in "king's/queen's" English, although if spoken with a Northern accent you could find some.

@Petter the town of Worcester rhymes with muster, buster, duster, fluster, lustre, and cluster.
Shire rhymes with spire, mire, tyre, fire, sire, dire, gyre, hire, ire, lyre, pyre to name some.
Now if you had mentioned Hereford called something like Hurfod by the locals, I may have agreed.

@FrayedBear Worcestershire is pronounced as Wooster, the "woo" being pronounced as in "wood".
Therefore your rhymes only work in a North country accent. The "shire" part is ignored by the toffs of "king-speak". Hence, Worcestershire sauce is merely wooster sauce.

@Petter Not in my illiteracy it isn't.

@Petter Do you think I give a brass razoo for how the "toffs of king's speech" pronounce things?
I'm reminded of the company monthly meeting of accountant, sales chief, managing director, production manager and head storeman. They were all, apart from the storeman and production manager berating the newly appointed salesman sent a month previously to the Northern Territory for not having submitted his monthly statistics/sales reports, expense claims, overtime sheets, etc. The storeman chirped up and said "yeah, he's the one who has emptied the stores" and the production manager said, "he has also given us a headache of 9 months of back orders to produce to meet his sales". . . when you are flowing profit who cares about how you spell or that you even do!

@Petter As I suggested perhaps all the Chalmondelays were sent to Africa with their execrable pronunciations and thankfully didn't venture too far north.

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