I was told by my family that I was stupid. I was told by the kids at school that I was too short, fat, and wore rag clothes. I was told by my husband that my idea for a business could never happen, because I was female. I was brutalized and left for dead by the next mate. [He did do some jail time for it. The police did make his stay in jail a living hell for him] I finally got an education to be a social worker, but didn't know how to play nicely with others by then. That is, I wasn't good at conforming so late in my life. I stay in my home where my walls can keep danger out. I jump every single time my cuckoo clock starts and make sure the closet doors are latched closed and the shower curtain is open all the way. I'm a bit lonely, but safe.
8
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6 comments
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.You are incredibly strong. I would not have survived all of that. I can relate to your caution about keeping your home very secure. Being a survivor of stalking, I can relate to that. I bought a condo on seventh floor. My building has cameras over every door and a 24/7 desk attendant at the main door. You could not pay me to live in a house. I agree with the person who said get rid of the cuckoo clock. You are made of tough stuff.
SKH78
Level 8
May 20, 2018
0
That’s a horrible situation. One easy thing you could do is get rid of that damn cukoo clock.
Hermit
Level 7
May 19, 2018
4
ha ha ha...I love you. that was good .
As I read your post I thought we are the ones that end up in prison for life. There are no words that can ease your pain or erase the horror from your mind but I do hope you will continue to speak up and maybe begin to feel safe to interact more. I hope you heal and find the love and kindness you deserve.
CreativelyMe
Level 7
May 19, 2018
6
Today is the first day of the rest of your life. Make it the one you want.
My upbringing was horrific, my father was a monster. But that was him, not me. Nor is your past you.
Mitch07102
Level 8
May 19, 2018
4
Wow. I am sorry you are so fearful. Perhaps a dog would make you feel safer. Even a small dog makes for a great alarm. Ever vigilant they are. Hypervigilance is a survival skill. Might I suggest counseling & medication to alleviate some of your fears. After all it is just brain chemistry. It helped me. I too did not play nicely having been imprinted by boys my 1st 7 years. I hope you find some peace. Best wished to you.
Mooolah
Level 8
May 19, 2018
2
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