Agnostic.com
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Tonight I was talking to a few people at a conference my husband helps run. See background, my husband and I are not straight, we are both bisexual.

Well a guy was talking about his long time ex gf who was married to a man, but divorced him and now she has a wife.

Another person expressed how some people get "disillusioned" with the opposite sex and decide to get with a same sex partner.

I held my tongue from going off completely about this, I wanted to lash out. But instead I simply asked if the woman identified as bi or lesbian. The guy said "we she married a woman." I said that wasn't my question. But before the "discussion" could continue someone else walked up and changed the subject.

After a moment I left. I have had a few drinks and I didn't feel like getting angery. But I'm annoyed. So I'm venting here.

SensualAva 6 June 10
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4 comments

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0

My two cents. I am bi, or pan, if you need to choose titles. I became sexually active at an extremely young age, 100% with adult men and boys....eventually I ended up in bed with a woman, and knew my penis belongs in THAT hole..I will do oral with men and boy, and occasionally anal, BUT I consider myself bi in that I love to fuck women, and love to have men fuck me...can't image a more programmed bi than that...

NormCastle Level 7 June 15, 2018
0

I know this sounds naive, but why is this society so hell-bent on putting labels on other people? It is a manner in which to judge others prior to meeting them face to face. Prejudice. We use labels as points of pride to make ourselves better than the "others".
I think that part of my Agnostic bent. When do adjectives stop helping us identify how we think/act/believe/love/look and start tearing us down? I run from Evangelicals. But I know many who chose that label who don't bother me at all. Hmm , they must be humans too.
I do, however, remember that they chose it. As I have chosen the Agnostic/Athiest label, not the gay one, not the male one, not the white one, not the American one, not the PTSD one, not the Lupus one.......not to mention the ones meant to de-humanize me that others have given me.
When my neice became romantically involved with her female friend, everyone jumped up and tried to label her. I just called her by her name.
When I was testing patients in a psychiatric hospital to get an accurate diagnosis for proper treatment, I stuck a label on them. Not one they chose. It sticks. When I hear those labels, I automatically have a picture of their behavior, and
for certain ones, I oftenn look for the exit....
The current atmosphere of... well... WTF is the current climate? It depends on your zip code and age. No one is burning my house down today. Still, I have a label I am proud of, and despise. it is completely unnecessary.
To rush to judgement over it is the sign of a small, closed mind. It is only good for gossip, and for prejudice.

"Unless you and I are in bed, naked, having sex, it is none of your business who I fuck.". Is the proper response to someone else trying to put a prejudical label on you.

JBradford Level 5 June 10, 2018
0

Most things that are possible are provable by example. Perhaps this other person knows (of) one or more individual(s) who did exactly that.

Do I believe that some women turn lesbian through bad experiences with men or that some men turn gay through bad experiences with women? Yes, absolutely. Do I believe that this is the reason why most gay men and lesbians are same sex attracted? Not at all.

I believe there are gay men and women, who enjoy the straight side of sex depending on the person, and there are straights, who enjoy some gay sex, again, depending on who the other person is....

6

It can be rough. You don't want to jeopardize your husband's work, but you also want to "educate" people. Unfortunately many of them don't want to know. As was discussed on an earlier post. People are narrow minded, and like things in small easily defined boxes. They also confuse innate sexuality with practicing.

Yeah, I just knew I couldn't articulate it reasonably while a bit drunk. And yelling won't educate anyone. I was frustrated, but could have been worse.

@SensualAva At least you were sober enough to realize.

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