Drag queen or king are cabaret entertainers transgenderism is life or death realities.

It can be seen as a mockery, sure. It can also be seen as another color of the rainbow--
I am just getting started @56yo-- I would not like that kind of energy from queen
behavior toward transwomen--
There are levels of "dishevelment" as well.- Tra la la..

I still cannot wrap my head around the levels of competition or dislike in our community. Yes it is a large community of many shapes, colors and stories but we are always stronger and safer in numbers. If nothing else I have learned, that much is clearer should be. I am truly sorry to hear any stories like yours.

Until I know the particulars of situations, it’s hard to pinpoint what exactly is going on but my experienced guess is that it is insecurity or isolation, or both . I’m of two minds on my feelings on this.

One is to say fuck ‘em all and just keep moving forward. Leaving the haters behind and standing in your own truth and strength. My other thought is trying to be gracious towards the haters and extending an olive branch. There’s no shame in being decent. But if they don’t respect you after trying , then you can always say you at least tried.

I no longer believe forgiveness is steeped in religion or necessarily weakness on anyone’s part. The opposite is true; It’s a real sign of strength, maturity and a wiser move than many people realize because they are just caught up in drama. And it goes back to defensive motives stemming from insecurity or past personal injuries.

If you think about it, isn’t that true of everything in life wherever there is conflict?
Each situation is different but It doesn’t matter. The common denominator is insecurity.

I applaud all bravery and courage too. Be authentic. My case in point is my own coming out to my parents at the age of 35. It was tremendously freeing to have finally come out of the closet.

Our truth sets us free and our struggles trip us up while weighing heavily. I don’t advocate broadcasting our sexual identity unnecessarily. Especially not in this fractious political climate of Trump. Hate crime is up, violence is up. Just look at the news. Safety is more important than self disclosure.

But within our own community, especially in clubs and local bars or venues, we are always happier and stronger as one family.
I’m not sure if any of this helps you but my goal is always to help, advocate and teach. I hope something I have expressed here helps everyone who reads it in some small way. It doesn’t matter who you are, Gay, straight, bisexual, questioning or something else,we are all struggling with something and we all share the same wants and needs. Be kind to yourself, especially in using your own inner voice. Positive self talk is extremely helpful and healthy.

Drag queens are mocking feminity. The exaggerated eyebrows and lashes. The lips. Breasts. Then the female impersonators with their intense focus on truly feminine structure, real breasts, weight loss and body sculpting. Then the CDs and TVs. Who just identify with feminine. Dress in the clothing. Occasionally go out dressed up.
I embrace it all. I empathize and enjoy as appropriate.
My fem side is strong - cost me my first wife (and lots of $!!!). Second wife was cool. Understood. Said she did...she was even more expensive to split from...
... it's complicated.

I support Drag Queens, transgendered, cross-dressers.
Life and our expression of our own is spectral. A gradient.
To shoe-horn everyone into male or female is ludicrous in the extreme.

I reject simplistic systems. I reject minds subscribing thereunto.

It's fun. Period.

First of all, thank you for your candor and I always appreciate others stories. As a Gay man, I have evolved from being very uneasy with Drag Queens who always would come to me in almost every venue I would visit. Back then I was uneasy. I now see how my struggle was stemming from judging all kinds of ways and my own insecurities. I believe insecurity is what drives conflict and it probably stems from religion. I think everyone is conditioned to be judgemental if you’re raised in any kind of the worlds religious settings.

Today, I have learned to appreciate the hard work that goes into drag. The reasons drag artists can give for their performances, styles and attractions to it are certainly individual choices. Where I am living, drag has been a hugely successful fundraiser for good causes like Mercy Flight funding for helping sick children and adults. So as to why drag is a choice, I can’t speak to that but I respect the efforts in spite of the abuse they endure from homophobic haters and all of it; including within our large LGBT community. Hate is intimidating, and drag and Trans people do their thing anyway. That’s huge courage. My understanding and respect for Trans people is equally strong. I’m very passionate about defending a persons rights to expression even if I don’t agree or like it. But those points are for another post in the future. And for the record, I would definitely date a Trans person because I know I can learn them as well as encourage and support him or her. We all have so much yet to teach and learn.

All of the hostility I've seen has been the other way round: trans women (or people who feel they're supporting trans women) speaking out against drag. We've had a few pride events in the UK talk about banning it, so as to provide a less threatening environment for transgender people. But drag is central to the LGBT community, even if it is more G than T.

I suspect a lot of trans women don't like the cross over between the two worlds. It's true that most drag queens are cisgender (usually gay) men who like presenting as 'femininity on steroids.' Absolutely, it's a caricature of femininity. What it isn't, specifically, is a caricature of trans femininity, just because it's men that are doing it.

Every once in a while, a drag performer realises it just isn't enough and ends up identifying as transgender. Many who do end up going down the surgical route. Again, I think this rattles a few purist cages amongst people who believe that 'true trans' is something you figure out way before puberty sets in, and that the late onsetters don't really belong.

As for my opinions of drag itself? I don't love it. I don't hate it. I enjoyed Priscilla. I've never watched a single episode of Drag Race. But the moment we start policing which AMAB individuals are allowed to wear GirlyClothes (TM) and which aren't, I get very uncomfortable. I'll defend anyone's right to dress as they please, unless someone can give me a damned good reason why they shouldn't. Not covering your face while entering a bank? Good reason. "I think the way you are dressed is wrong and/or offensive to somebody somewhere?" No, not good enough.

It has roots in mockery and nonconformity, but it's more about beauty and performance these days. I wouldn't do it and still don't want to be mistaken for a Drag Queen (who generally identifies as a gender different than their performance persona), but I support friends who do it.

I've met a few queens (and, though not as many, kings) over the years. The main thing I've learned is they're exactly the same as everyone else on the LGBTQ+ scene and in wider society - some of them are lovely, kind, supportive people and some of them are assholes.

Drag is a part of who you are, what you're comfortable with. Don't let intolerance get you down.

I've had similar intolerance from lesbians because I'm bi. At first it really bugged me. Now I just let it roll right off