Agnostic.com

7 6

LINK Tony Bourdain- Suicide Hits Again

I cannot believe this. I have loved Tony Bourdain for so many years. He is one of my idols. I have read everything he's ever written and I build my weeknights around his shows, the latest being on CNN.

I had no idea he was suicidal. I mean, I realized he was a haunted man, but I thought he had, in his older years, come away from his darker past and could see his life more... Retrospective... Like many older folks who lived hard lives...I am no different than him having a past in the LA and SF Party Scene full of drugs, booze, Rock n Roll and sex. (although that was the One Thing I avoided: sex AIDS was the new disease on the block and I was not down with that.) Albeit I'm one generation behind Tony. I just figured he was one of the lucky free that made it to the more peaceful years... We are supposed to be coming together, within ourselves, by now. ...I guess I just... Assumed he had and was, too. Seems I was mistaken...

I guess I just... Related to him because understood the type of party past he emerged from. His writings were so thought provoking for me too. He changed me... And he was only a celebrity... Someone I never even knew... I am so heartbroken today.

Bowie and Lou Reed loses fucked me up about as bad as this. 😟

Sadoi 7 June 8
Share

Enjoy being online again!

Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.

Create your free account

7 comments

Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.

1

Depression is a deadly disease, that needs to be taken a lot more serious. Most of the time, you cannot tell if somebody is depressed, because most people tend to hide it - out of shame, or the fear of stigma. I never forget, when I was diagnosed with depression at the age of 17, my mother would tell me that I just needed to get out more and be out in the nature. She still - after 18 years - doesn't understand, that she is asking a cancer patient to just stop having cancer.

Someone with Major Depression, you can't just ask them to exercise more, to go make friends, to just be happy, when the hardest task at hand can be just making it to the bathroom from the bed.

I wish some people would just stop with these "just snap out of it!" bullshit attitude. And post shit on FaceBook, to stop taking pills, because they are poison, all we need is look at the rainbow and the horses running. It makes me so mad. Without my meds, I would not be here today...

Anthony, and many other celebrities, like Chris Cornell, Chester Bennington and recently Kate Spade chose death over asking for help...That's how difficult it is to ask for help and open up about it. People rather die than to uncover their "secret" darkness inside them to the public, to the family, and live with the stigma and the bullshit.
Very sad.

Yes, I just complained about how this is also the norm in the medical field. How we are forced to hide it for fear of being judged, passed up on promotions or blackballing ourselves for future jobs. It is such a fine line.

And, don't worry, you will always have My Support and i will Never judge you on it. I understand and i Respect what you go through. That is something you will Never have to question.

0

I am so thankful Andrew Zimmern is still here. He is my second favorite. He was also such a good friend of Tony's. It is difficult for me to watch one and not to think of the other. For me, at least...

Sadoi Level 7 June 9, 2018
1

It really is quite sad...?

1

Chris Cornell, Avicii, Chester Bennington, Anthony Bourdain! WTF?

1

Yeah this was a shock for family and I; we all enjoyed his programs.

Kate Spade's suicide a few days ago doesn't seem as bad in that it was known she was really struggling with suicidal ideas for a long time. Robin Williams, it's now known, was getting out in front of a physical diagnosis of an unusual type of progressive Parkinson's-like palsy that would have progressively annihilated his ability to pursue an existence he found meaningful. But Bourdain, everyone seems to be saying, has never been happier, so it seems almost spur of the moment. And with a young child in the mix, too. My guess is that he was far more existentially conflicted than pretty much anyone knew. Something triggered him, I guess.

I guess the three suicides I mention here come to mind because they also all went by the same method, self-strangulation, which strikes me as a particularly awful way to do the deed, from the perspective of the person dying anyway. Which makes it even harder for me to process.

Today as I tried and tried to think of reasons, one thing dawned on me... what If he had fallen prey to drugs again, but no one knew, and what if quick on he realized that was the case... and that he couldnt deal with going through addiction again...? I mean, i am grasping at straws here, but i just Cannot understand what is happened...

@Sadoi Possibly. Depression is also stigmatized by society such that people who suffer from it chronically, learn to conceal it very well. So he may have been in tremendous pain and just didn't share it. That seems very plausible; in my experience no one wants to hear about my struggles, or gives a useful fig. After awhile you just quite running your mouth; it doesn't accomplish anything.

Bright people like Bourdain tend to be complex and tormented, and it's hard for them to find therapists that they can respect, who aren't purveyors of bullshit and who can see through the patient's BS, etc. That's a pretty tall order.

@mordant Yeah try being in the medical field while dealing with it. You are almost forced to keep it concealed for fear that your own co-workers will be second guessing you and you can easily be passed up for jobs in this field if they suspect you are "mentally unstable." However, medicine is STRESSFUL. Only a robot could slide by half the shit we see.

Its double drama when you must feel shame over it and you must hide it for fear of losing your job, being passed up for promotions or snagging a future job.

Honestly, it Needs to Stop... the stigma. Its Deadly. It Is killing simply by forcing silence and Shame on to every emotion that Isnt upbeat and cheerful. How many more must die.

2

@Stacey48 had some really good posts about him today too. I will miss his courage and openness to new peoples, cultures, ways of living and of course the food. All that and he was entertaining too... fuck

1

Tough moment!

Write Comment
You can include a link to this post in your posts and comments by including the text q:102456
Agnostic does not evaluate or guarantee the accuracy of any content. Read full disclaimer.