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What do you want? How hard are you trying? Or you don't need to try hard to get what you want because you know where to find it.

Saint Valentine Day is Over... VD day to some... Valentine day to others. Many here Bashed the day. And yet many here will love to have what the day represent.... a "Sweetheart". So, how hard are you trying? Do you know what you want? Had you give up on having what you want? Do you understand that you don't need to try hard if you look in the right place? Some simply hate the concept. Hate The Day, because they put "value" on the money spent. I am just wired different I guess... I had never met a Bad Woman. Never experienced a bad break up. And I understand that some people may Hate to Fall in Love... because they had never understood what it is. I don't give a Fuck if hallmark made millions on cards. Is not about the cards, flowers or chocolates. It is more... Did you ever had a "Sweetheart"? Is your Life Better with one or without one? Be Honest. If you never had one... said so. If you did, tell me you did. What life is better? Which you prefer? Are you Man or Woman enough to Share all moment of your life with another? Or simply you are an independent unit unable to connect. Because having a Sweetheart is having a connection with another being.

GipsyOfNewSpain 9 Feb 15

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It took me 8 years after my divorce to find someone I connected with. I was fine on my own, and was becoming quite set in my ways before he came along. I was swayed to take a chance on a man who adored me, and I am happy that I did. Unfortunately, I lost him recently. I am prepared to wait another 8 years, or more if I have to, to find that again. I don't NEED to have someone in my life. I would prefer to be alone rather than settle.

I'm very recently divorced. At first I just wanted/needed someone to care about me and for me to feel the same about them. I think I was just starved for affection. I'm finally really happy being single. I'm not going to settle again. I did that in my marriage and ended up divorced after a lot of miserable years. I know myself better now and know what I seek in a mate. Definitely prepared to wait to find him. In the meantime I'm going to have fun dating and meeting new people!


My two options are to share every moment of my life or share none of it?

How about just someone I exchange a smile with every time I see them. Someone I can watch a show with, meet for coffee, smoke some weed, and have sex with sometimes.

I don't need all his moments, and I'm not giving him all mine.

What you mentioned is not a sweetheart is a part time relationship, not a companion.

@GipsyOfNewSpain I disagree.

@Lysistrata I respect you for disagreeing. My point expressed stays the same. You never answered the question though.

@GipsyOfNewSpain Would I rather be alone than in a suffocating, codependent relationship? Yes. Do I think that makes me less of a woman? No. I think it makes me more of a grownup.

@Lysistrata A Soulmate is Not Codependent situation. Those hurt by love are the worse to ever find it again. I am sorry you were hurt to the point you rather be alone. To me a partner is not codependent situation. Is a witness to share moments. No reason to argue you just don't understand that Not All Love will Hurt You. 'Wish you Luck.


I would love to be in love again. Thought I'd found the one to build a lovely loving life with. It did not work and I am over it but don't know exactly why it went south.
I'm not the woman I once was as far as my physical abilities and that seems to be a deal breaker. The good news is I have always played well alone so I don't get down or feel lonely. I don't even know if I share well. lol

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