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Why is so difficult to find a woman to date as an atheist?

kkocur89 2 Sep 25
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0

From a biological standpoint, women are looking for men who can support them and their children and not leave. A religious man may be seen as meeting more of that criteria. None of this is in the conscious mind, you understand, so I am not being misogynistic.

The fact that you felt it necessary to point out this isn't misogynistic makes me think you already know it is.

@Neverjenny No, I simply understand that some will see it that way when I am saying it from a biological and especially human-evolutionary point of view.

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I live in California and have no problem dating non religious men. It is not a topic I bring up, Im kind of on the down low with my views on religion. I will say that I was raised Catholic but started questioning their teachings as a teenager. I only recently came to realize that I don't believe in God and it was a cathartic moment, I cried but felt relief as well. I no longer feel guilty for my lack of faith, but I also don't feel the need to deny others their joy in sharing their love of Jesus. Different strokes, I guess.

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Depends on the problems you are running into. There are obviously very few openly atheistic women compared to those who are religious which limits the total available in the dating pool. With that in mind do you have a problem dating theists or do they have a problem dating you? I have been an atheist since the age of 10 and I have never been in a relationship with someone who has the same lack of belief that I do, and as much as I cannot help the fact that I think those who follow any specific religion are gullibly ignorant I have learned to focus on the other parts of life that I find more important. I do not live my life constantly focusing on the fact that I am an atheist and a lot of people do not live their life constantly focusing on the fact they are religious so in the big scheme of things the most important quality I look for is whether or not they are good people and I have found that to be what most women are looking for if you can intelligently and passionately voice your beliefs and morals.

1

It is just as difficult for men to find an another without religion...

3

because it is also difficult to find a non religious man to date with

unfortunately that is true on both sides.

2

I'm in Austin, Texas -- and I find it hard to find atheist men to date. I've tried dating believers and it doesn't end well. I thought that there would be a bigger pool of candidates in a place such as Austin but after years of dating, the odds seem to be against me.

1

Dunno. I know a lot of atheist females. Of course, everyone's already dating someone else, so I guess that says something.

1

I don't think it hard that all ive ever dated. Now im tired of have to deal with there beliefs. Most of them knew i was an athiest and still dated me

I wish I could find an atheist man, preferably black. Black Americans are very religious and when I reveal to someone I'm dating that I'm Atheist, they act as if I have 4 heads! LOL

I'm what you call a hard atheist or ant-theist not only do i not believe in a god im sure there isnt one...

10

I live in the south. As a woman, I just gave up on dating unless I know they aren't religious. Too many bad things come with religion in the southern U.S.

TeeJae Level 3 Sep 28, 2017

I feel for you. I've heard, but now I am getting first hand experience; somewhat. Where I work, there is a very vocal religious woman from Texas, and a less vocal, but very religious man from Florida. This is not a big problem, but the fact that she talks loudly, and freely expresses her thoughts on the bible, and everything else religious, and political. I'm considering filing a report, because in my view, she is creating a hostile work environment.

Also in the South. I feel like nearly everyone around me is religious. This is a problem, not just for dating reasons. If there's anything I miss about church, it's the sense of community.

North Alabama here. I'm also surrounded by religious zealots. Finding a likeminded person here is like searching for that proverbial needle in the haystack.

Perks of living in the bible belt. I have given up on dating.

4

Well overall there are fewer female non-theists then males making the pool a lot smaller if you are looking for someone of the same "religious" belief. If they don't have to be non-theist in particular, then your pool widens. There is a growing population of Nones (most are spiritual but not religious) and people who have low religiosity (but are still believers). However, women are still more likely to be religious/believers and have high religiosity compared to men.

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Generally, I think it depends in part on your expectations, socialization, search parameters, and presentation, among other things. Additionally, I agree with paul1967.

I 100% agree

7

To find someone who is right for you is hard enough but when you're in such a minority as atheists are finding the right atheist for you is next to impossible. I have a theist wife and I just do my best to bite my tongue every time she asserts she knows God is real. She will ask me why I'm incapable of accepting Jesus into my heart. I once made the mistake of asking her why she didn't accept Thor into her heart. She sniped because he's not real. I said then you have your answer to why I can't accept Jesus into my heart.

My parents are in the same situation, my Mom is religious, my Dad is not. They just don't discuss religion with each other, ever. My whole life I've never heard my Dad make a single mention about religion or religious beliefs. My Mom did try and raise my brother and I as Christians, but she didn't force us to keep going to church, so our religious brain-washing was incomplete, and we both ended up becoming atheists.

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