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The Funniest Tweets from Parents This Week

From HenpeckedHal

Parenting is easy as long as you:

  • can name every species of bug
  • pull snacks out of thin air
  • crave ill-informed feedback
  • always bring the 'right' toy
  • despise sleep

From Maryfairyboberry

If two toddlers, both tying their own shoes, begin leaving the house at 7AM, traveling approximately 0.000000001MPH in different directions, at what time should their mother begin drinking?

[huffpost.com]

LiterateHiker 9 Sep 22
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4 comments

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2

I was teaching 6th grade Science class and I complained to the class that their absentee rate was too high. A student raised her hand and said "Well, our teacher makes us sick.".
Sometime later, I was talking to a plant in the classroom trying to make the point that we exhale CO2 which is what plants need to grow. I said "what am I trying to do by blowing my breath on the plant?" A student replied "kill it". I asked the class class if I had bad breath, a student replied yes, but it's OK "all teachers do".

2

"There is truth in wine and children." Plato quoting Socrates.

1

There is nothing faster than a toddler that was just asked "What's in you mouth?"

2

Kids do say the funniest things and though provocking lol

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