Spouses Who Have This 1 View of Their Partner are Twice as Happy in Life
"Those whose spouse or partner is also considered their best friend get almost twice as much additional life satisfaction from marriage or cohabitation as do others --- even when controlling for pre-marital well-being levels.
The scientists controlled for age, gender, income, health status, and previous life satisfaction.
A best friend has your back. A best friend supports your dreams. A best friend is someone you can call anytime, anywhere, without feeling like they'll resent you for it. They're the person you put as an emergency contact and the first person you think about when something wonderful happens at work.
They know all your quirks (and love you anyway). They can challenge you in deep ways because they know the ins and outs of your psyche (and love you anyway). They're the kind of person who'll make soup and draw you a bath when you're sick, even if they're busy, because they genuinely want you to feel better.
If you're looking for a way to examine the status of your current or future romantic relationship, it's probably wise to keep this in mind."
The study is linked in the article. As I've always said on this forum when posters have asked what's the most important thing you're looking for in a partner' --- it's friendship -- a best friend.
"It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages." - Friedrich Nietzsche
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My husband and I are best friends, and we have been married for 22 years. I don't know if it works for everyone else, but it certainly has worked for us.
Browneyedlady
Level 7
Mar 26, 2018
1
i knew it! which is the reason why i'd first have to become friends with a man i consider becoming my partner - it doesn't work the other way around for me.
walklightly
Level 8
Mar 25, 2018
2
"They can challenge you in deep ways because they know the ins and outs of your psyche (and love you anyway)."
We recently had a discussion on loyalty. My partner let me know her loyality was limited and setting boundaries is important for both in a relationship. You have an obligation to take care of yourself first. Best friend part is correct and I would have it no other way. Even though we were polar opposites on personality we were 95% aligned on beliefs about life.
Thaks for quoting Nietzche.
JackPedigo
Level 9
Mar 25, 2018
2
This points out my biggest mistake; I didn't marry my best friend.
I_dont_know
Level 7
Mar 25, 2018
2
I'm a believer. My husband and I met as coworkers, became friends and then lovers ... ultimately, married and were business partners. The hardest part is, when he died, I felt his loss on so many planes. Overwhelming, but I don't regret a bit of it.
Lauren
Level 8
Mar 24, 2018
2
@VictoriaNotes Thank you, Victoria. We were married for a little over ten years.
I dunno...if Nietzsche's statement is true, I've divorced two 'best friends'.
Highway-Starr
Level 7
Mar 24, 2018
1
The f/m relationship that has eluded me so far and that I search for still is the one where we are both each other's shoulder to cry on.
ImmortalVegan
Level 4
Mar 24, 2018
2
I totally get that. I have recently decided (accepted?) that my "picker" has been broken from birth. 
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