My father is dead, if there is an afterlife he would be pretty miserable and quite hot. My mother is a condescending arrogant cow. Her response is, "You believe what you want to believe and I will believe what is right"

I guess I've been lucky with this. If it bothers anyone on my side of the family I wouldn't know, but then again I'm not in your face about it either and they're pretty mellow themselves overall.

In the early days of my coming to reason I'd break into parody songs say when my late grandmother was watching the Jim & Tammy Faye baker story to which she gave me the endearment of being her "sacrilegious little fart".

Actions not words. There are not many words that would convince her otherwise, so prove that you're a better person without it.

Well, I told my Mormon parents that I was goth gay and atheist at the same time. I was particular in mentioning how i thought the bible was just a bunch of made up stories. My intent was to take the scriptures away from them as a tool to be used to in trying to convince me being gay was wrong. For me, it worked out about as well as could be expected.

I am not sure if I mentioned it to my parents or not, but a story I often tell religious persons who try to convert me is about hwo I tried for years to be religious and was miserable, but when I accepted atheism, I became very happy and have been happy ever since. That is how I stop people form trying to convert me. It has the additional benefit of beign true.

Be understanding. They’ll be gone all too soon.

Bring home Church of Satan or Voodoo books and tell her you found your religion.

Seriously, I don't know what to tell you. My father knew, but he was fighting his own religious breakdown, so we actually discussed it (my mother was deceased but I know she would not have cared). Maybe try to just not bring up the subject or tell her you don't want to discuss it.

Figure out a way to agree to disagree.

I told my mom about my beliefs and she and I had an argument. One day, I said to her that I'm not changing and she just told me "fine, I won't argue anymore. I'll just stick with mine. I have nothing to lose and we will see in the end." She wasn't angry, but kind of like it was hard for her to break away from something she held onto for so long. She hasn't talked to me about religion since. My father died before I could tell him, however, I think it would have been easier to tell him because I think he was low key agnostic.

My father and step-mother knew my beliefs and never said a word about it. But my mother knew about my beliefs and at first never said anything but as she got older religion became more prevalent in her life and she started to catechized me for my beliefs. One day we had a very long conversation about our beliefs and in the end we both accepted each other and never said anything about it again. For my that how I do things. I sit down the person and try to communicate what my beliefs are and listen to them and then have a conversation. It may not work for everyone but it works for me, maybe you should try it. Seeing things from their point of view and explaining how you see things may not fix things right away but at least you are talking and listening to each other.

Mine never understood they eventually just gave up and finally accepted it.

With fava beans and a nice Chianti.