Was I too hard on him?

For five years, Greg has mistaken my intensity for anger. After I countered his racist statements, he said I was “ranting before, during and after .” I’m still laughing about that.

“I realize you mistake my intensity for anger,” I replied. “If you think I felt angry before, during and after s-x, you are sorely mistaken. S-x with you was delicious. It appears my intensity, intelligence and strength scare you. This has been a problem since we met.“

Greg is on his best behavior before s-x. Afterwards, he often starts a fight to push me away because he’s terrified of feeling vulnerable. When I challenge him, it gives him an excuse to stomp out.

Mocking "I can't breathe" signs

“I can’t breathe’ signs are wrong because if people can talk, they can breathe,” he said smugly during pillow talk the last time I saw him.

“’I can’t breathe’ signs are powerful and moving,” I replied. “With fear and panic, people take shallow breaths. Feels like we can’t breathe. Black people being strangled by police can’t breathe. No one says ‘You are stopping 98.6 percent of my breath.’ People don’t talk like that. They say, ‘I can’t breathe.’ The sign is eloquent and powerful.”

“I disagree with removing Confederate statues because it destroys history,” he said.
“WHOSE history?” I replied. “ supremacist history. You are siding with supremacists. How would you feel growing up as a black , seeing statues that exalt men who fought to keep ?”

“I don’t know,” he replied. “You need to develop empathy,” I said.

men are being discriminated against

Affirmative action discriminates against men,” Greg said a few years ago. "Unqualified minorities and women got promoted over more qualified men.” Previously, he worked for the FBI.

“Come on!” I replied. "Affirmative action is to correct long-standing discrimination against minorities, women and disabled people in hiring, promotion and other employment practices. Not to mention the fact that women average 72% of mens' in commensurate jobs, and black people are 66% less than men on average. Your attitudes are way behind the times.”

Now he’s mad at me. “You’re not the arbitrator of what is racist,” he texted. If it quacks like a duck and looks like a duck, it’s a duck.

I plan to dump Greg for good. FLUSH.