22 2

How do you folks put up with holidays and traditions?

For instance I'm openly atheist... all my family knows this (they think I worship the devil).
I'll show up to a celebration every now and then, just to spend time with my nieces and nephews.
Though I love spending time with them, I hate myself for allowing myself to get involved in the festivities I don't believe nor care for.
And when I tell my family I don't want to show up nor participate.... I get so much flack and they guilt me into it.
Ps I do enjoy some Xmas parties mostly cause stupid ppl use it as an excuse to have a party.... ha!
How do you guys put up with such nonsense???

Vico 5 Nov 30

Enjoy being online again!

Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.

Create your free account


Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.


Just enjoy them. Make it a happy time. Think of it as celebrating the Winter Solstice.

It is celebrating the stolstice. 😉

I make sure everyone hears about it. I like to tell the kids about how the Earth has reached its height and how we are now going back towards the sun.

Yes, doesn’t matter really matter how traditions originated. Humans have rituals and traditions. It turns out that they may have actually originated in a different way that we were raised to believe. Doesn’t matter, just take advantage that there is some kind of thing that brings people together.

In the northern hemisphere, we are being tilted up and back away from the suns direct rays and have been tilting up and back since June 21. On September 21(fall)we reached an equinox and the earth is not really tilted at all- straight up and down-. Earth continues to tilt up until about dec 20 (my birthday) or 21st where it reaches its maximum tilt and it’s the shortest day of the year.. from that point on the earth begins to tilt its northern hemisphere down and towards the suns direct rays.


Wait, you don't worship the devil?! What kind of lackadaisical atheist are you? All praise be unto Satan!

Honestly, I don't mind the festivities. Christmas is largely secularized anyway, and I hear a few "birth of Jesus" references but I tend to hear that much religiosity from family whenever we gather. I have to ignore it or it would eat away at me too much.


I think you need to be more specific - what elements of your festivities require you to be a "believer"? In my experience, most traditions (e.g. Xmas) are simply an excuse to get bladdered and are nothing to do with beliefs etc. In fact, Jesus is never discussed and, when he is, it's simply an exclamation because the children's toy batteries aren't working 🙂



godef Level 7 Nov 30, 2017



That's a hard one. I would love to participate, but my family's christmas activities are almost exclusively religious. I take my younger siblings out for crafts, parades, and tree lighting events, but mostly stay away for the rest. No point in awkwardly staring at the wall while they discuss the latest christian books, or "miracles," or church happenings.


My family expects me to be around, but not to do anything religiony. I believe they secretly think I’m just agnostic and being rebellious, but will come around. I’m fortunate they don’t bother me. My daughter is agnostic, she asks me stuff sometimes. I know my mothers faith is very important to her, and I will ask her about her bible group people and church whatnot. I treat it as it were a fan club. They pray at dinner, I eat.


I was raised Christian. I know how early indoctrination works. I remember the struggle I had. So I don't blame them. Holidays are for family gatherings of what is left of us. Religion never comes up, at least not when I'm around. Christmas is for gift giving and Easter is for egg hunts. I don't worry about what they do when I'm not around. I guess I'm just lucky that nobody is in my face with the silliness.


Happy, knowing i am doing it to help us grow some kind of relationship.


I simply say Happy Gift Giving day. Years ago I spent Christmas in Singapore and it being a country that consists of Buddhism, Islam, Hinduism and Christianity it was surprising to see every single shopping mall that we found was decked out like the malls here. Full of lights, decorated trees and most of what you see in a "christian" community. Let me say it again, THE MALLS were decorated as if everyone was a Christian but not many homes we ran across were decorated. So I say Happy Gift Giving day. I have to admit I do enjoy giving gifts and it is fun when I find that gift for a loved one that I know they will really like and I know I "nailed it". So to me its not about any fictitious character. Its just time off from work, seeing family, friends and finding that perfect gift. I don't care when Happy Gift Giving day takes place it could take place in March, October wait not October that is for Halloween. Well any month that we can take time off from work a see family and give gifts. 🙂


Christmas is Yule. No problem there. It’s the beginning of a new cycle.


This'll be my first year. Some things will change...I won't feel guilty for not going to church on Christmas, but I really don't see any reason to raise too much of an issue with it. If somebody asks me to go to church, I'll just tell them 'no.' My daughter has to sing Silent Night in her public school. That upsets me more than all the rest of it. 😀


I live 800 miles away from everyone else, and I use my week off to work on home improvements lol.


I don't get involved with any of it. My small family knows where I stand and they don't really do much with it either so I lucked out there. We do something in January where we exchange little gifts between my daughter and the grandkids. We call it the January blues giving. So I don't put up with any of the nonsense either like most people.


Food, football, gifts, family. Look on the bright side!!!!


I love holidays! So much so, in fact, that I invented my own, as adaptations of the Pagan wheel of the year.

You have some kind of problem with fun? People need to celebrate, and be silly, and enjoy one another's company. It's a human thing.


I am happy to participate. I was raised in a musically talented family (met my sons father when I was 15 at All-State choir), I love most Christmas music. I go to midnight mass almost every year because I love Handel’s Messiah and if there’s a sing along anywhere I leap at the opportunity. I’m an “old soul” so any tradition connecting me to the past is like seeing old friends.
I do not decorate, I put up a tree once when my son was 3 or 4 and all my gift giving is making donations in the receivers name. I ask every year which they want and if I get no response, I choose for them.

I’ve posted these pics before, but quite possibly the best season to date was my daughter playing Jesus in the nativity at her gay dads (plural) church. My first college roommate kept the card I sent like 15 years ago.


Don't recognise it or them. Every day is a cause for celebration, even if it is a bad one. Birthdays come everyday.


if its family and you care I guess you should bite the bullet like funerals or weddings. make the most of it as it doesn't change who you are.


I simply ask them what they're going to do for a holy day from another religion.


Hey its for your family and their kids to let them decide.... I know I was in the closet for so many years..Stil not sure if they except it.. Be tolerant and you will wake up with a present under ur pillow..


Well i have 3 adult children who grew up never in organized religion and we celebrated Christmas as mostly a family get together-with way too much"gifting" from my well to do in-laws and Santa when they were young. Now we kind of celebrate Winter Solstice as the focus. I'm not sure what I'll think if grandchildren appear. I grew up Protestant, going to Sunday school, candlelight services, choir, baptized. My kids did not(maybe a couple of candlelight Christmas Eves) It's an interesting phenomenon. Plus we are all vegan which changes the menu quite a bit.

Ya my earlier xmas was only a get together and exchange gifts.. If that day had a different name we would still celebrate the time together..


I charish and enjoy my time with my family. I am grateful for the time I get and that what Christmas is really about to me. Not some woman who lied about her virginity.

Write Comment
You can include a link to this post in your posts and comments by including the text q:5992
Agnostic does not evaluate or guarantee the accuracy of any content. Read full disclaimer.